


Take A Chance

by Kiiesaa



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Crushes, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-06
Updated: 2017-08-10
Packaged: 2018-08-13 10:27:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 88,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7973479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiiesaa/pseuds/Kiiesaa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Life has always been a constant cycle for Lee Jeno; always the same thing everyday. But as he caught sight of a boy who was around his age one fateful day, he knew right then and there that everything was going to change.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Collaborated work between me and my room mate cause acads are stressing us out and we need an outlet to let it all out. We posted this on wattpad and aff cause why not, right? - kiiesaa & axidreinn

The day began with nothing but just the old, pure silence that he was already used to by now. It's not so big of a deal anymore since he likes silence more than the senseless noises that he doesn't wish to hear. He has oddly grown fond to it.

As he was about to take a shower, he heard his phone ring, indicating that he had received a text message.

>>   _Hey man, you comin' to school today right?_

Smiling for the reason that his best friend kept on checking up on him to see if he was fine, he replied:

<<  _I'm fine already, so yeah._

He threw his phone lightly on his bed and went on to the bathroom. After preparing himself, he left the house in silence with a smile on his face.

On his way, a lot of people from his university greeted him, asking if he was okay and how he was feeling. He responded with a soft smile and thanked them for even asking.

When he arrived in front of the school gate, he found his best friend slightly leaning his back on the gate wall, knee bent, one hand on his pocket, looking so cool while talking to someone he knows.

He smiled while looking at them, showing his usual eye smile that practically hides his eyes to everybody who's watching him. Many were looking at him yet chose to not interrupt and just head on to their classroom instead.

When he was about to walk past them, he heard someone shout his name.

"Jeno!"

He turned his head to where the voice had came from and saw Mark come running towards him which made Jeno smile once more.

"Why'd you didn't come near us? If Yuta-hyung hadn't mentioned that you've arrived when he saw you, I'd be there all day, waiting for you," he ranted as he was now in front of Jeno.

"I was afraid I might disturb the both of you if I did, Mark," he simply replied.

"You know you won't. Stop saying stuff like that all the time," and Mark had his usual poker face on, earning a chuckle from Jeno.

“Alright.”

“C’mon, let’s go,” Mark said, motioning the other to go inside.

Jeno nodded, adjusting the backpack’s strap that he had on one of his shoulders as he followed behind Mark.

Both were now headed inside the school building. It was a little early compared to the usual days they went to their first class so they took their time.

As both made their way, Mark was talking about something to Jeno; some movie he and his older brother had watched the night before. It might not look like it but Jeno wasn’t listening. He was smiling at the other, occasionally nodding if the situation where Mark needed a reaction from  his slightly younger friend arises, but yeah, he wasn’t paying attention, not at the slightest.

Mark knew but wasn’t exactly fazed and continued talking even though the other wasn’t listening.

Jeno not listening was something Mark was very much used to by now for all the years that they’ve known each other. The other was easily distracted by his own thoughts and had the attention span of an infant after all.

Jeno and Mark have been friends for as long as both of them could remember. Their parents have been friends before either of them was born and even if Mark lived at Canada for most of his life.

They were pretty fond of each other. They share the same interest in music and sports, so they became friends easily.

Mark was an easy going type kind of person, he was friends with a lot of people, but Jeno would always be the closest friend he has.

Jeno knows him the best even though the latter doesn’t say much but yeah, he does.

And same goes for Jeno when it concerns Mark.

When they arrived at their classroom, every person that was already there welcomed the both of them especially Jeno who had been absent for a week since he was out sick.

“Good to see you back, hyung,” said Chenle, one of their friends and Jeno’s seat mate as the latter settled down on the seat besides the former. “I swear, you were gone for a week and the girls couldn’t stop making a fuss about it.”

Jeno greeted the younger male with a smile. Chenle was a year younger than Jeno, he skipped a grade. He was a genius. “Thanks, I’m fine now.”

“Don’t be fooled, he secretly likes the attention he gets,” it was Mark who answered, seating down on Chenle’s desk. “Jeno likes it when people are making a fuss because of him.”

“No, I don’t.”

“But you are doing a good job at it though, everyone was worried,” Chenle said, not bothering to listen to Jeno disagreeing. 

“Except me,” Mark injected with a slight smug tone on his voice, quiet proud, a smirk plastered on his face. “Wasn’t worried even the slightest.”

Jeno turned to his best friend, wanting to question him but was beaten to it.

“Nice try Mark,” Winwin, another one of their friends, snorted at the other as he neared the three and joined in the conversation.  “You were tensed most the time when he wasn’t here.”

“Yeah. I’d say you were the most worried,” Chenle started, turning to the older. “Mark wouldn’t stop pacing back and forth when you didn’t reply to any of us when we texted you on the first day that you got sick,” the younger explained. “I got dizzy just from watching him.”

Winwin agreed, nodding. “It was burdensome.”

“I did not. And yah! Chenle, I’m older, it’s hyung to you,” Mark complained at the two who were teaming up on him.

“We’re on the same grade, I don’t think that counts,” Chenle reasoned.

“Of course it counts!” Mark argued. “I call Winwin ‘hyung’ don’t I? We’re on the same grade yet he’s older by a year, so you should do the same.”

“I was behind a year because of medical reasons so we became classmates but Chenle is here because of his brains and that proves, he’s older than you in terms of intelligence,” explained Winwin, sporting a smirk as he was looking at Mark, who was now frowning.  

 “Yah hyung, you should be on my side, not on his!”

“I don’t think so Mark.”

Jeno chuckled at the sight of Mark being flustered at the teasing he got from Winwin and Chenle.

It wasn’t every day that one gets to see the usual calm and composed Mark Lee be agitated at something.

Jeno finds it secretly amusing.

The teacher suddenly arrived; Winwin and Mark went back to their seats while Jeno and Chenle straighten themselves up and class began.

\--

 

Morning classes ended in a blink of an eye, it was now their lunch break.

As the bell rang, everyone started leaving the room to head to the cafeteria to get lunch. Everyone left except for Mark and Jeno.

Mark got something from his bag, stood up and sat down besides Jeno; where Chenle sat earlier, placing two lunchboxes wrapped with a handkerchief on the table.

“Jaehyun-hyung outdid his self for today’s lunch.”

“Tell him I said thank you.”

“Will do.” 

Mark gave one lunch box to Jeno. “Let’s eat,” the latter said and both started eating.

As tasty as the food they had in the cafeteria, Mark still preferred eating homemade food for lunch so he would always bring two lunch boxes prepared by his older brother, Jaehyun; one for his self and one for Jeno.

Mark was finished eating first. After cleaning up, he excused himself to go somewhere.

It was always like this every day; Mark would usually go somewhere after eating lunch to one of his other friends, maybe, leaving Jeno all alone to himself until the end of lunch break.

But the latter doesn’t mind.

He had finished eating the lunchbox Mark had brought for him and wrapped it back with the handkerchief, planning on returning it to latter when he comes back from who knows where.

Jeno stood up and headed for the window. No one was in the classroom except for him so he decided to do something.

The latter was at a daze, staring at nothing in particular.

As Jeno was looking outside the window, he saw some kids of their age having fun at the field, playing football.

He had found himself unconsciously observing them for a while.

Watching them made him smile unintentionally. They seemed to be enjoying so much that their happiness seemed to reach him too.

"Hey. You look like a fool. What are you smiling at?" said a voice from behind him. But knowing fully who the owner was, he didn’t turn his head to look back.

"Huh?" Jeno was confused when Mark came near to the window, besides him, to see what the younger was looking at.

"You wanna play?" his best friend asked while pointing at the boys still at the field below.

He just looked at him in response.

"Let's go. There's still time before lunch break ends." Mark wasted no time, turned his heel and was about to walk out but Jeno stopped him by holding him on his wrist.

Mark gave him a questioning look, “What?”

"I can't. I don't wanna lie down again in bed, sick." he explained easily.

"Oh yeah," nodding as his best friend's words were still digesting inside Mark’s mind, quiet out of it and not fully understanding what he meant by that.

Jeno was in the verge of laughing but tried containing it at his best friend's somewhat confused face.

"Oh yeah! You just got well!" the latter exclaimed when he finally realized what Jeno was pointing out.

Unable to suppress it anymore, Jeno burst out laughing. Muffling his laughs with his palm as he covered his mouth with it, trying to stop from laughing but failed.

Frowning because Jeno's laughing at him, Mark sat down at the closest seat he could get his hands on and waited until the former finishes doing so.

"You done?" looking at his best friend who's showing his eye smile at him

Jeno nodded as an answer which made Mark sigh.

The latter stood up. "Let's play with them once you're fully recovered," he stated out of the blue, knowing fully that Jeno is bummed out by the thought of not being able to play sports just because he was out sick for a few days. “I’d beat you then for sure. Yuta-hyung has been giving me tips.”

“Sure, game on,” he smiled at Mark’s encouraging words.

Mark is pretty bad at showing emotions. Yeah, very bad at it.

But he definitely tries to when his friends are in need of his  _very helpful_ advice slash pep talk.

Jeno is thankful he has a friend like Mark to look after him.

And all of a sudden, the school bell rang, indicating that lunch break was already finished. Mark got back to his own seat as other students came flooding back into their classroom.

\--

 

When the afternoon classes started, it seemed like all of their teachers were just passing by for neither of them both were really listening to the class discussions from time to time even if they seemed to be so attentive.

The instructors would sometimes not look at Jeno's side. He would usually smile at them if he catches their eye and honestly, Jeno’s smile was very distracting.

Mark was a whole other story.

Usually Mark would always get asked about the topics being discussed by their teachers since he occasionally falls asleep at some of their classes unintentionally. Winwin, who was sitting behind him, would nudge his back to wake him up if the teacher calls his name but even if he does, he always manages an answer, leaving their instructors somewhat satisfied.

Mark was pretty smart too.

The lessons went on and on, until the bell rang for the teachers, telling them that they have an emergency meeting to attend to.

"Well, this is uncalled for. Then, I will let you off with just a reading assignment for the next meeting," their teacher said.

“Yes,” all of the students in the class answered in unison.

When the instructor finally got out of the room, Jeno came to where Mark is sitting and woke him up before saying goodbye to Winwin and Chenle as they left.

"Hey sleepy head,” he shook Mark’s shoulder lightly to wake him up. “Class ended."

The other stirred and slightly lifted his head, rubbing his eyes to chase away the sleepiness he felt. When Mark finally woke up, he saw that their room is almost empty.

"Where'd everybody go? And why is your backpack with you already? It ain't time yet," he questioned.

Jeno shook his head. "We were dismissed early because of an emergency meeting. Fix your things already," he said.

"Okay. Cool." He stood up to fix his things before the both of them decided to leave.

As he was about to close his notebook and put it back in his bag, Jeno caught a glance on what Mark might have possibly doodled on it before he dozed off in the middle of class.

“Nice doodle,” Jeno said as he was trying to give off a smirk but failed at it and ended up as a smile instead. “I didn’t know you could draw other people like that.”

Mark’s eye widened slightly at the younger’s remark for a second but regained his composure immediately after that.

“Thanks man,” he replied as he showed Jeno what a true smirk looks like.

When they got out of the classroom to head on home, they found Ten and Johnny walking towards them from across the corridor, hand in hand.

“Hyung, what made you come all the way here?” Mark asked Johnny as the distance between them shortened and both older boys were now in front of them.

Being ignored by Mark, Ten pouted, earning a quiet chuckle from Jeno when he saw the older’s cute reaction at Mark overlooking him and focusing only on his cousin.

Ten turned when he heard the sound Jeno made and smiled at him. Jeno had that effect on everyone. His smile was very contagious.

“Eh, nothing much.” Johnny replied and turned his attention to Ten, motioning him to answer instead since the slightly younger male was the reason why both of them went over to the high school department of their university to talk to their younger friends in the first place.

“Oh right!” He fished out two black and white envelopes from his bag. “We’re just handling out invitations for the party.” The latter said while giving both Mark and Jeno an invitation for an event they do not know of. “We already gave Winwin and Chenle theirs when we met them at the hall.”

“What is this for?” Jeno can’t help but be curious at what the said invitation was for as he flipped it around.

“Looks cool,” Mark said.

“Well it’s for my birthday, it’s next week,” Ten said in a voice that hinted happiness and excitement in it.

Jeno smiled as heard the tone Ten had used. “So you were planning on throwing a party, hyung?” but it was Mark who asked.

He nodded eagerly. “I’ve always wanted to but Johnny was against the whole idea of it,” he replied as he pointed to Johnny who has besides him.

“I wasn’t,” Johnny argued, slightly frowning.

Johnny is pretty protective when it comes to Ten but shows it in the most oddest ways.

Ten was known to be a flirt around the university before they got together. He liked Johnny immediately after they were introduced to one another since they had the same group of friends even though the latter was a year above him.

Getting Johnny to like him back was a whole different story meant to be told some other day.

Ten changed the image he was grown known of but still, Johnny couldn’t help feeling a bit agitated sometimes when random guys and girls would start flirting with Ten again, thinking that he was still the same old Ten and haven’t changed a bit.

And throwing a party on his birthday would be another outlet for those people to flirt with him again openly. Why can’t they just understand that Ten was already taken and has a boyfriend?

It took a lot of pep talk from his best friend, Hansol, before Johnny agreed to Ten’s wishes.

Ten understands the elder’s intentions entirely. He really does. He knows Johnny more than people give him credit for but never fails to tease the older about it sometimes.

“No, he definitely was,” the younger argued back. “Hansol-hyung persuaded him to allow me to.”

“He did not.”

“Did too.”

Jeno couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight of two bickering infront of him while Mark was only watching them in silence.

“Yeah, so come, okay? Everyone will be there,” Ten said after realizing that they were keeping the two from leaving just because he was joking around with Johnny. “And I’ll expect you to be there too,” he said with a hint of finality and gave them a smile that they can never say no to.

Both of them nodded and the couple left after saying goodbye and exchanged a few smiles and hugs.

As Mark and Jeno were now walking out of the building and into the school grounds, Mark began blurting out something about the cause of his straight cousin turning gay, making Jeno just listen to him as he did.

“I still can’t believe Ten-hyung is the reason why Johnny-hyung turned gay.”

“What’s wrong with that?” Jeno asked as he was still unconsciously eyeing the two figures whom had their backs turned at them since they were also heading the same direction as they were, talking with each other. “They look fine together.”

“I know, I’m not against them or anything like that,” Mark didn’t even bother lower his voice, knowing fully that the couple wouldn’t be able to hear him since they were already far away.

“Of course you’re not, Mark.”

“Hey,” his voice was an octave lower than usual, looking at his best friend, searching for any sign of judgement but sees none.

“I was just stating a fact.” Jeno gave the other another genuine smile, encouraging the other to continue.

He sighed. “It’s just that I thought he was straight until he told me that he’s in a relationship with Ten-hyung.” Mark explained. “And I never really liked him for my cousin at that time.”

“Yeah. I understand. Don’t worry.”

“You don’t. Well you see I never really expected it and it just happened.”

“I told you, I understand.”

“No, you don’t. Listen, he never showed any signs of being gay that’s why I never really thought he was!” he explained further, trying to be as coherent as possible.

“So, you mean that you’re gay?”

“Oh my god, you’re so impossible!” Mark finally gave up from convincing an already convinced Jeno.

Why did he even bother trying anyway?

“You know what, you’re taking everything too seriously,” Jeno started. “I already told you I understand…” as he said these words, his voice came off soft and almost cannot be heard for his attention was caught by something else, making him stop from his tracks.

“Hey, why’d you stop?” Mark asked, also stopping to look back at Jeno.

He was looking at something, unconsciously smiling at it as he did. “Cute,” he said quietly but it was loud enough for the former to hear that Mark raised a questioning brow at his best friend.

“What? What’s cute?” Mark asked as he went to where Jeno is standing, to see what he was looking at.

“Nothing really.” Then Jeno continued walking, leaving Mark glued to the spot to find out what caught the younger’s interest to actually make him stop and give it a second glance.

“Oh! You mean the cat?” Mark quickened his pace to catch up with the other and walk besides him.

Jeno only replied with a soft hum while taking a mental note of what he saw and thinking if there is someone who owns it.

There might be, because someone came to pick it up  _again_ as the two had their backs turned


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Exams are done and was finally able to update. Sorry for the long wait. Thanks for reading this btw. Deeply appreciate it. -kiiesaa, axidreinn

The alarm had been ringing for a few minutes for the 5th time already and the body lying comfortably on the bed still doesn’t want to get up. He did wake up eventually, but solely for the reason that he’d snooze his digital clock and go back to sleep again.

Unintentionally, he looked at the time while he’s still half asleep with drowsy eyes and what he saw woke him up completely and made him nervous. To make sure that his clock was right, he reached out for his phone, then it doomed into him.

He was 20 minutes late!

He got out of bed as quickly as he could, tossing his blanket unto the floor as he did, and went straight to open the door to shout for his mom to hear him.

“MOM! WHY DIDN’T YOU WAKE ME UP?” after doing so, he went back inside to prepare the fastest he can and by that, it means a preparation under 5 minutes.

As he was changing into his school uniform, he kept on telling himself how stupid he was.

“Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why did you even let yourself get tempted? Why did you watch those things even though you know that will keep you up at night? Why did you do that, you stupid human being?” he ranted to himself.

Okay, he wasn’t like this most of the time. Really, he wasn’t. He usually is sane. Trust me.

After looking into the mirror and deciding he was decent _enough_ , he went downstairs, dashing, only to argue with his mom when he saw her at the kitchen counter.

“I am not the one who watched anime ‘til morning, Na Jaemin,” was his mother’s reply to his statement earlier.

“I am your son! Why didn’t you do me the favour of waking me up?” he defended as he hurriedly prepares a sandwich for himself. Even though he was late, going to school in an empty stomach just seemed like a bad idea.

“For you to take responsibility of your actions last night,” his mother simply added as she took a sip from her coffee.

“Oh my god, mom! Are you happy I look like trash right now? You could have woken me up and just let me reflect on my actions later on tonight!”

“I told your brother to wake you up,” she asserted as she went near him to at least soften his hair that’s all over the place.

“So now you’re telling me you did your part? Wow mom. You’re such a good person,” he replied with a tone of sarcasm.

“You’re welcome,” she smiled, dismissing her son’s attempt of picking a fight with her entirely. “Now, go already. The driver’s waiting for you; I already gave him instructions to drive you as fast as he could. Let’s just continue this argument later. Bye sweetheart.”

“Can’t you take sarcasm?” disbelief can be heard on his voice.

“I do. But not taking you seriously is the best way of disregarding your sarcasms,” she explained. “Just go already, time’s ticking, you know.”

“I hate you mom,” was what he said yet he slightly bended down and gave his mother a soft kiss on her cheeks before he went outside.

There were only the three of them living on this big house of theirs at the moment, Jaemin’s dad works overseas and isn’t usually home most of the time, well, except during holidays. It may not seem like it but Jaemin really loves his mother very much, more than anything, more than his anime!

“I love you too. Be safe on your way to school,” he heard his mother tell him but he wasn’t able to answer back since he was running towards the car that been waiting for him.

Jaemin walks to school most of the time so he would usually wake up early to do so since his house had quite a distance from their university. But today wasn’t like one of those days.

Even though the car ride was fast; so fast that it had Jaemin silently praying that they won’t hit anyone walking on the streets – the driver was a speed maniac today, it still wasn’t fast enough for him as he kept looking at his wrist watch, watching the time tick as if it was slipping away from him.

When they arrived at the now almost isolated entrance of the university, he let out a very relieved sigh; he could finally breathe properly as he got out of the car. He made it out alive!

After he thanked their driver, he sprinted with high-speed inside the halls of the high school department of the said university, not caring if he was already out of breath.

He dashed through the halls, ran as fast as he could while skilfully dodging other people who weren’t in their classes as he passed by them, making sure to not hit anyone. And since his classroom was on the third floor, it was physically taxing.

Jaemin was panting heavily as he was in front of his classroom. He peeked through the transparent window of the room to see where their teacher was.

Apparently, classes had started since his classmates all had their attention focused on the one who has in front.

He first conditioned himself because he was nervous and definitely out of breath.

_Do I even look decent enough?_

Because from what he knows, the teacher they had for their first period was not only a strict one but rumors has it that she hates late comers more than anything as well.

“Ok, Na Jaemin. You can do this,” he told himself. “You will enter the classroom without your teacher noticing you. You will be as quiet as a cat stealing food. You will be able to sit down in your seat as if you’ve been there all the time. You can do this!”

He opened the door slowly but surely, trying to make no sound. He crept inside, walking carefully.

Some of his classmates saw him as he went inside. They gave him looks that clearly says he needed to move faster before their teacher catches him. He nodded at them and smiled, making a mental note to thank them later for their concern.

Donghyuck noticed him from his seat and grimaced when he gave Jaemin a look.

“Na Jaemin, you know I don’t tolerate tardiness in my class,” said a feminine voice yet held this tone that was full of authority, coming from the front.

Jaemin froze on the spot from where he stood, caught by surprised. Did he just get caught? How was that possible? He was so sure he didn’t made a sound as he crept inside.

He turned to look at her only to realize that the teacher was still facing the board and is currently in the midst of writing something and had her back turned from him. How did she know that someone had entered the room if she wasn’t even looking in the first place?

_She’s psychic._

Jaemin straightened himself before bowing apologetically. “I’m so sorry Miss. It won’t happen again.”

“It better won’t,” the teacher sternly said, not bothering to look around and continued writing what it is she is supposed to be writing. “Go to your seat.”

Jaemin didn’t need to be told twice. The latter rushed towards his seat at the backmost part of the room, conveniently besides his best friend. He almost tripped when he did - it was a good thing that he caught his self before he could actually fell down.

“You look like a mess,” was the first thing Donghyuck had said when Jaemin settled down on his seat beside him. “Didn’t bother tidying up, did you?”

“Well, good morning to you too,” Jaemin greeted his so-called _best friend._

Trust Lee Donghyuck to criticize his appearance before even attempting to greet him first.

But the latter just shrugged, leaning back into his seat. “I’m serious.”

“Thank you for reminding me,” Jaemin rolled his eyes as he took out a notebook from his backpack and placed it on his desk. “Didn’t have time to - had been running ever since I got inside the campus.”

“What happened anyway?”

“I overslept,” he reasoned. “I was up all night doing something.”

“You were up all night doing ….” He faked a surprised gasp, even covering his mouth with both his hands in an exaggerated manner. “Ya! Na Jaemin, does your hyung even know you watch that stuff?”

“What?!!” Jaemin smacked the slightly older male’s hand that was on their shared desk. “Ewww. No! I was up watching anime.”

 “Aren’t you too old to wat--”

“LEE DONGHYUCK, NA JAEMIN, IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE THROWN OUT FROM THIS CLASS, I SUGGEST THAT THE BOTH OF YOU TO KEEP QUIET!”

Jaemin flinched as their teacher raised her voice at them.

_That woman is scary._

Both boys immediately ducked their head, momentarily looking at each other, making this mental message to not talk to each other anymore unless classes are over before their homeroom teacher kills them alive.

\--

 

“She scared the hell out of me,” Donghyuck said when the bell rang and their teacher went out of the room. “I swear, one day, I’m gonna get a heart attack because of her.”

“Yeah. That sure was intense. I’ve been waiting for the bell to ring since the moment I arrived here,” Jaemin said as he tried, yet again, to fix his unruly hair.

“You’re always waiting for the bell, Na Jaemin,” the other stated and did an eye roll.

“I am not!” the former denied.

“Duh, who looks at his wrist watch almost every minute that passes?”

“Hey! You’re exaggerating it. I only look when I think class is taking too long!” he defended himself.

“See? You even admitted it yourself,” Donghyuck said, making his point.

“You! You cheater!” Jaemin exclaimed when he realized he took the trap set out by the slightly older male.

“What? I’m still right about it.”

“Don’t try to act like you love classes so much. You watch the time pass by as much as I do!” he argued back.

“Well, I don’t deny that I do it occasionally, unlike you,” the other stated, dismissing the conversation entirely, trying to not be the one talked about. “And you know what? Stop trying to comb your hair with your fingers,” Donghyuck pointed out. “You’ll be running at the field and we both know that that won’t make you look any nicer.”

“You’re clearly evading the topic.” Jaemin frowned at the other but then followed what had he been told.

“I’m not, and come on already, I know you’re itching to be at the field right now,” he stood up and started walking towards door, which was shortly followed by Jaemin.

“Am I really?” his tone seemed to be curious and teasing at the same time.

Donghyuck gave him a glare which only made Jaemin giggle.

Arriving at the field, to their usual spot just close to the bleachers, Donghyuck, as Jaemin has noticed, can’t keep his eyes still; it was as if he simply looking around for _something_ in particular.

“He’s here,” Jaemin said as he spotted a certain familiar figure not far from where they were.

“Who?” the older asked as he looked at Jaemin questioningly.

“Who else?”

Donghyuck then turned his head to where Jaemin was looking at and he saw Mark waving at them, coming their way.

However, not watching where he was going, Mark stumbled upon a girl which caused the said girl to trip on her feet, the books that she was holding all fell down to the ground.

Jaemin and Donghyuck both watched in silence as Mark helped the girl up and bowed, showing how sorry he was. The girl just waved him off with a small smile, telling him that he doesn’t need to be sorry and that she was alright but Mark just won’t stop and kept apologizing.

“You seem irritated,”Jaemin amusedly stated as he caught a glance of his best friend’s darkened demeanour as he was still the watching the sight infront of him.

“Stop being a bitch Jaemin and just shut your mouth up,” the other said through knitted eyebrows.

He was irritated alright.

Jaemin snorted, not really affected by what Donghyuck had said. The latter was like that most of the time. “You really are irritated,” he seemed to be enjoying himself, seeing the other pissed at him.

Donghyuck was the one usually annoying Jaemin, so now, being the one teasing the former, Jaemin liked it. Mixing it up a bit is nice.

“I am not, okay? And what would have made me irritated huh?” the other dared him.

“Well, you do know that I know you pretty well, and you only say those kind of words when you really are irritated, and I don’t know, but maybe it has something to do with what had just happened,” he talked so fast that Donghyuck didn’t almost caught a single word he had said. Jaemin had to be fast for he knows that they won’t be able to bicker as much as they would like to once Mark is near them.

“What? What do you mean by ‘what happened’?”

“Oh, nothing really. It depends on how you interpret it,” he shrugged and did this dismissive gesture with his hand. “Hey, he’s coming this way now,” Jaemin said to cut the topic off, motioning that the other was close.

When Mark was just a few paces from where they were, Jaemin decided to greet him. “Hey hyung,” he waved at him.

“Hey Jae,” the slightly older male greeted back with a nod as he neared them. “What are you up to?” he asked, seeing that the other was wearing a t-shirt rather than their school uniform.

“Gonna play football with some guys, wanna join?”

“Nah, I’ll pass.” Mark smiled, rejecting the offer without second thoughts.

“Oh. I really wanted to see how well hyung has taught you.” Jaemin seemed like he wanted to confirm something when he said it. “Hyung told me you’ve been asking him how to play.”

“Uhh,” he lagged and was somehow looking for an alibi but couldn’t think of one.

“It’s okay hyung if you really don’t want to. I won’t hold grudges,” Jaemin laughed at what he said.

Mark scratched the back of his neck and laughed along, awkwardly.  “I’m really sorry that I can’t right now, but how about next time? I’ll play next time. I’ll even bring a friend along if you want me too.”

 _“Is he trying to please me or is he just trying to compensate for not being able to play today? Oh well. I’ll think it’s the former,”_ Jaemin said in his thoughts as he smiled at older one before he said, “Okay hyung. I’ll count on that.”

Suddenly, a classmate of Jaemin and Donghyuck’s went to where the three were and had a chat with Jaemin about the game that they’ll be having, making Mark having no one to talk to besides Donghyuck.

 “What are you doing here?” Donghyuck said in an almost ‘trying to be irritated’ tone when he noticed that the other has now turned his attention to him.

“You ask that almost every day.”

“Cause you keep following us during lunch every day,” he stated in a matter of fact, like it was already an obvious thing and Mark just didn’t get it.

“I have my reasons,” Mark answered easily as he shrugged and settled down to sit beside Donghyuck.

Donghyuck then moved away from Mark, trying to keep a distance between them.

Jaemin raised a bemused brow at the two when he saw what had just occurred.

He wished that his classmate won’t leave him alone but he knew it won’t happen since the other guy already left and went to talk to their opponents. He didn’t have a choice left; he sat down at Donghyuck’s right side, preventing him from ever moving if Mark would move closer to him.

This didn’t seem like a bad idea, Jaemin thought as he saw Donghyuck struggling to keep himself away from the older.

“So I heard he's back,” he heard Donghyuck told Mark when the former finally gave up on his pathetic attempt of avoiding the latter. How do you even avoid someone who sits just besides you?

_Huh? Who’s back?_

He knows he might be probably eavesdropping on a conversation he has no business on whatsoever but who cares? Only he knows of it anyway.

“Yup. I’m glad he is,” Mark replied easily.

_Who the hell is ‘he’?_

“Was he the reason why you can’t play with Jaemin?” he heard curiosity in his best friend’s voice as he asked.

“So you were eavesdropping on us?” non-belief is evident in the elder’s voice, he resisted the urge to smile but failed terribly.

“What?” Donghyuck looked at Mark like he did absolutely nothing wrong. “I had nothing to do! Of course I’ll eavesdrop!”

“Why are you being so defensive all of a sudden?”

_Oh, they’re starting at it again._

“What? I was only explaining why I did so!” the younger retorted.

“Okay, okay. C’mon, I was only teasing. Relax,” Mark reassuringly said, trying to calm the other down before he turns all diva-ish on him again like he usually does.

Then there came that silence Jaemin has encountered a lot of times when he is with these two. But he knows fully that it isn’t an awkward one though, not one bit.

“Well, I could name a few reasons why I don’t want to play and would prefer to just stay _here,_ ” he heard Mark continue his explanation.

And this made Jaemin look at the both of them, only to be shocked by what he saw.

_Mark-hyung is smiling while looking far away and Donghyuck, this guy is actually blushing?!_

Jaemin wanted to sigh out loud, he really did.

He can’t keep being with these two every lunch time, he just couldn’t. He feels like he is intruding on something and it isn’t nice.

“Jaemin! The game is starting!” someone from the field called for him.

_Yes! Saved just in time._

“Okay,” he immediately stood up and stretched in place, conditioning his body for another strenuous game he was bound to be part of.

And he is well aware that Donghyuck is giving him glares at the moment.

 _“I’m doing this for you, Donghyuck-sshi. I know I’m just being in the way.”_ He wanted to tell his best friend this but he knows it will be the end of Lee Donghyuck if he did so he chose not to.

“I’m heading off now. Enjoy yourselves,” he said the very second he finished his usual stretching procedures.

 “Na Jaemin, don’t you dare leave me here!” the older threatened, not wanting to be left alone with Mark the moment he leaves.

However, he didn’t listen and only gave him a teasing look. Jaemin then jogged towards the field and left the two fools to themselves.

\--

 

It will not be an easy game like the previous ones he has played in. Jaemin knows that pretty well. One can tell by how the game is going that things are getting more serious than it should have been a few minutes ago.

He is mindful of the fact that his opponents all belong to their high school division football team but he and his team would not back down from them even for a fraction of a second. The atmosphere was getting heavy, tension rising, each team won’t give the other a chance to score.

A minute is left before the game is called to an end and the ball is in the possession of Jaemin. He is now being pursued by two of their opponents as he ran across the field.

_“Darn it people. Get out of my way!”_

Although caught in the adrenalin that their game had given him, Jaemin didn’t lose focus and saw a hole in their 2-man defence against him and took the chance immediately to pass it to his teammate, who also happens to be a regular for their high school football team.

It was not in vain for their team scored a point just before the whistle was blown and the game ended.

Jaemin’s team ran to where the scorer was and crashed into him for a group hug. Their opponents then came to where they are to congratulate them for a job well done.

“Congrats guys!”

“Good game!”

And such was told to them.

 “I know I’ve already said this but you gotta join the football team, man. You’re good,” said the team captain of their university’s high school football team who apparently, was the one Jaemin’s team had won over in a short match a while ago.

Jaemin smirked. Truth be told, he likes it when other people praise him for the way that he plays. “You know my answer to that already.”

This wasn’t the first time that someone has asked him to play officially for their school. However, whenever he does, Jaemin always declines every offer he gets.

“It’s such a waste. Our school team could go far if we have you as our forward.”

“Thanks but I think I’ll pass.” Football was fun for Jaemin, true. But playing it competitively, he didn’t want that.

“I heard that your brother also plays for the collegiate team,” another added.

Jaemin nodded, quiet proud. “He does.”

Yuta, Jamin’s brother is one of the forwarders for their university football collegiate team. A lot of people have said that he was one of the best in the bunch, but Yuta just won’t let that get into his head, instead it pushes him to practice more thoroughly each day, making him better at the sport than he already is.

“We played with the collegiate team three days ago, and man! Your brother is so good at football!” exclaimed by the one who scored.

“Yeah, we didn’t even stand a chance to them!” said by one of the guys who pursued him at the last minute of the game.

“Don’t worry guys. We’ll be like them too,” encouraged the team captain to his members.

“Of course you will. Just practice diligently every day and you will be like them too in the near future.” Jaemin told them which made them all cheer.

After saying goodbye to the people he had played with and promising to meet again for another game some other day, Jaemin headed back to where he had left Mark and Donghyuck a while ago. But Mark wasn’t with Donghyuck anymore when Jaemin looked over to the spot they were at.

As he was crossing the field, he saw Mark from where he was standing, slightly waving at him as the latter headed off the school grounds. Jaemin waved back at him and then Mark disappeared inside the building, probably going back to his classroom.

“Done flirting with him?” was what Jaemin had said when he finally reached where Donghyuck was, reaching for his discarded bag that was beside the other who was busy with his phone.

Donghyuck looked up from his cellular phone just in time to glare at his best friend, “I wasn’t flirting with him, Na Jaemin!”

“You could have fooled me,” he said as he got a bottle of water and a towel from the contents of his bag.

“Okay now what’s that supposed to mean?!”

But instead of answering, he just gave him a dismissing wave as he took a sip from his water bottle. “Why did he leave early anyway? Usually he stays until the bell rings.”

Donghyuck sighed. “His best friend came back after missing school for being out sick. He wants to check up on him.”

“Well, isn’t that _nice_ of Mark-hyung.”

He stared at Jaemin, brows furrowed. “Why do I get this feeling that you’re implying something there? And don’t call him ‘hyung’, it’s weird.”

“I’m not. You’re just paranoid, Donghyuck. And it’s not weird. He _is_ older than us.”

“Then call me hyung too then since I’m older than you are,” demanded the other.

“Not happening. I lost my respect to you way back then,” he shrugged.

“What do you mean Na Jaemin?” he earned another glare from Donghyuck.

“Eh, nothing really. Depends on your way of interpreting it,” Jaemin answered back as he smirked at his best friend.

“Remind me to tell your mom not to let you leave the house if you lack sleep since you’re becoming ruder.” Donghyuck turned his attention back to his phone and didn’t mind Jaemin anymore.

“Not doing that,” the younger replied as he sat down beside Donghyuck making the other grimace.

“Ya! Change your clothes, you smell of sweat. It’s disgusting.”

Jaemin could only sigh. “Why am I friends with you again?”

“Cause Na Jaemin would be nothing without Lee Donghyuck,” the other proudly said. “And…. I blame your brother.”

Jaemin laughed as a certain memory came flooding back to his mind.

Back in 1st grade, an unexpected incident happened between Jaemin and Donghyuck which caused them their friendship as of the moment.

Yuta left his brother to a playground inside the university since the driver has still not arrived to pick them up and he needed to get his books which he forgot inside his locker.

Jaemin went to the sand box and noticed a boy already playing there before him yet he didn’t mind him and continued playing on his own. Apparently, that other boy was Donghyuck.

Boys, slightly bigger than them then came to where they were, and Jaemin being the one nearest to them, they tried to get him out of the sand box so they could have it for their own. But Jaemin, being the hard headed little kid that he is, won’t budge.

“You don’t own this, so why would I leave, you bullies!”

His brother often told him that he has to be capable of standing up for himself ‘cause Yuta wouldn’t always be there to help him out if he gets into trouble. Jaemin knew, at a small age, that he needs to be tough in front of bullies, like the ones in front of him, so they know they can’t mess up with him even though he was still a 1st grader.

His rather loud statement earlier caught Donghyuck’s attention from across the sand box, which made the older go to where Jaemin was, standing infront of him and shielding him from the bullies.

The big boys and Jaemin where confused as to what he was doing but it was answered immediately by his actions.

He started making faces in front of them, turned his back and slapped his butt, and then he spread his mouth with both fingers on either ends as he made another face, showing his tongue out as he said, “Bleehhh!!!!”

He then grabbed Jaemin’s arm and they ran for their lives while the big bullies were in hot pursuit after them.

Both were laughing as they run until their path crossed with Yuta and as soon as the bullies saw Yuta hugging Jaemin, who was so much bigger than them, they decided to not chase the both of them anymore.

Remembering this made the both of them laugh since Donghyuck claims that Jaemin clearly made a fool out of himself back then but the other knows that the one that really made a fool out of himself between the two of them was Donghyuck.

After the laugh that they had, they sat together in silence for a while.

“I think I might really need to take a shower right now,” Jaemin stated which broke the silence. “I reek.”

“I’m so glad you thought of it.”

And they laughed once again.

\--

 

After a quick detour to the shower room to have a quick shower - to take the repulsive smell of sweat off his body, to change back into his uniform and probably also to tidy himself up, Jaemin, alongside Donghyuck, were now headed back to their classroom.

“Jaemin!” called a voice from behind them.

And Jaemin knows that voice too well. He turned around and saw his ‘favorite hyung’ running happily towards him.

“Ten-hyung!”

Ten immediately enveloped the other in a bone crushing hug when he approached him. Well, it has been awhile since they last saw each other, who could blame him?

“Hello, I’m Donghyuck and I’m here as well,” Donghyuck said as he waving his hand infront of Ten, trying to get the elder’s attention.

But neither one of the two boys answered.

Donghyuck had his hands on his hips, staring with disbelief at the two males for not noticing him. “Well that’s just rude.”

But still, no answer came.

The two were on their own world, not caring about the people around them – not caring that they were being stared at by students who were passing by. Because what’s more weirder than seeing two guys hugging each other in the middle of the hallway, right?

_Nothing._

“Now you’re being mean.” Donghyuck sighed, giving up and decided to just stare at them. “You two act like you’re father and son.”

“Tell me about it,” Johnny, who was obviously with Ten but was left behind when he made a run for Jaemin, stood beside Donghyuck. “Jaemin is Ten’s favorite dongsaeng afterall.”

Donghyuck looked up at the latter – since there was a major height difference between them, before snorting, “And I don’t see the reason why.”

No matter how big the age gap they all share, all four boys belong in the same group of friends in the university, one way or another.

Donghyuck and Ten were family friends. Their parents would usual force them to hang out with each other if they had the chance a lot of times before in the past even though they had a slight age gap between them. That’s how Donghyuck had met Johnny and the others; through Ten.

Donghyuck had met Jaemin a little late compared to when he met Ten but they still became best friends nonetheless.

Ten met Jaemin after the latter was with Donghyuck the day the former came over to Donghyuck’s house to visit him. Ten was silently observing the both of the from the living room door when he arrived. The way Jaemin had interacted with Donghyuck, unaware that someone was watching them, the way he was teasing the other, even the way he moved, he reminded Ten of himself in an odd way. Ten liked the younger in an instant. They became very close friends after Donghyuck had properly introduced them to each other.

Yeah, Ten was pretty fond of Jaemin.

Ten patted the younger’s head with affection as he still had him in his embrace. Johnny, who was watching the two males interact in front of him in silence, had a smile slowly painting his face at the gentle gesture the younger had displayed for Jaemin.

It was one of those moments that reminded Johnny why he had liked the former in the first place.

“Nana, why haven’t you answered any of my calls lately? I keep calling you these past few days!” scolded Ten as he let the younger out of his hold.

“Really? Sorry hyung. I don’t give attention to my phone most of the time,” he said as he embarrassingly rubbed the back of his neck.

But the older only pouted at the younger’s explanation.

Jaemin couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight. Ten might be older than they were but he was still childish in many ways than one. And honestly, Jaemin likes that about him.

“Hey, don’t forget that you were supposed to give them something,” Johnny, who also chuckled at Ten’s actions, reminded him of their purpose for coming all the way to the high school department .

The latter looked up at Johnny and remembered. “Oh yeah,” Ten handed both Jaemin and Donghyuck similar envelopes that had taken out from his bag. “I won’t accept an answer other than yes.”

Eagerly opening the envelope he had gotten, Jaemin asked as he scanned through the contents, “Is this for your birthday, hyung?”

“Yeah, it’s next week. You’ll come, right?”

“I’m busy that day, hyung,” Donghyuck interjected.

But Ten rejected the younger’s interruption. “I wasn’t talking to you Donghyuck, I was asking Jaemin,” he snapped at him.

Donghyuck pouted, not amused that Ten wasn’t going along with his jokes. But it was a usual occurrence between the both of them that the latter has surprisingly grown used to.

Ten was a savage in his own way to any living human being that wasn’t Johnny or Jaemin.

Jaemin laughed softly at the sight of his best friend pouting. Only Ten could bluntly deny Donghyuck of his daily need to annoy basically everyone he knows. “Sure hyung. I’ll definitely come.”

Ten’s expression brightened by tenfold at the younger’s answer, making him smile at him. “I’m counting on that.”

Jaemin could only smile back.

“Ya Donghyuck! You better come as well,” he then turned his attention on the still pouting Donghyuck after Jaemin had answered.

“And what if I don’t, hyung?” there was a hint of threatening in his voice.

“I knew you’d say that,” the older shook his head, not entirely surprised with the younger’s usual excuse. They pretty much grew up with each other after all. “I’ll skin you alive if you don’t,” Ten threatened back.

Donghyuck made this somewhat disgusted face and said, “You’re brutal.”

“That’s how much I love you,” Ten said with a smile – which looks more like a smirk in Jaemin’s opinion.

But it’s an evil one, Donghyuck believes.

“And my parents kept reminding me to invite you too,” Ten added.

“That I could believe.”

Ten came to where Johnny is standing; almost forgetting for a second there that he had asked the other to accompany him handing out invitations to their friends at school. The taller one then encircled his arm in a sort of protective manner around Ten’s waist when the younger drew near.

“Be thankful to my parents you’re being invited Donghyuck,” Ten said as he wrapped both of his arms around the taller male’s waist comfortably in response.

“Just be honest hyung, that you, yourself want me to be in your party,” he replied, trying to prove his point and just disregarded the scene in front of them.

“Donghyuck. Really. Be thankful to them.” Ten stated in a monotone, deadpan voice.

Not happy even the slightest that he was losing this fight against Ten yet again, Donghyuck pouted.

Both he and Jaemin saw Johnny leaned down considerably to quickly kiss Ten’s forehead. He then whispered something to Ten, which in return, made the younger give him a soft smile as a reply.

The scene made Jaemin smile even more, while on the other hand, it made Donghyuck want to puke. Don’t get him wrong, he liked them being together. But it was just that, they are so sweet to each other and it was so cute yet cheesy at the same time that one would easily get jealous if you see them being _that_ happy.

But both males know how difficult and how complicated the struggles on which the couple had to experience and endure before they got together.

“The two of you, please stop. You can both flirt once we’re gone, y’know,” Donghyuck stated but then again, it was disregarded by the two.

“Hey babe, you were going to invite him as well, right?” Johnny asked Ten, clearly ignoring Donghyuck on purpose.

 “Him?” clarified Ten, blinking cluelessly at Johnny. But the other just did this thing with his brows that Jaemin and Donghyuck couldn’t understand the meaning of but Ten appears to have understood. “Oh right! _Him_ …”

Jaemin and Donghyuck turned to each other, Donghyuck gave this confused look and Jaemin just shrugged as a reply, not understanding the conversation the couple were having.

It was no mystery to anyone in the university that Ten and Johnny were together. Jaemin had no problems with that, if you were to ask him.

_They look cute after all._

And then, Ten went back to look at Donghyuck, but now he had this weird grin on his face. He was up to something, he had to be. “And by the way, I plan on inviting Johnny’s cousin so it adds to the reasons on why you should be there too.”

The latter’s eyes then widen at what the older had meant with what he said. “You’re inviting him? Why?! Don’t!”

“Well duh, he’s Johnny’s _cousin_ ,” he said in a tone like it was the most obvious thing to ever have been said. “I have to.”

“Why are you all like this to me people? Do you have any problem with me or something?” he ranted out of the blue. His friends were teaming up on him.

Jaemin could only laugh at Donghyuck being hysterical.

_Doesn’t he get it that we are actually helping him out?_

“Oh darling, don’t be mad. I only did it to help you fools,” Ten said in a rather sweet voice which only made Donghyuck frown even more. Ten and ‘being sweet’ just don’t go along in the same sentence together, Donghyuck affirms. 

“Well, just come anyway. It won’t hurt if you do, right?” Johnny encouragingly said, smiling at the younger to get him to agree. What was a party if not all your friends could be there anyway?

“Johnny’s right,” Ten agreed, smiling at his boyfriend for helping him out. “Just don’t do anything foolish which will ruin his cousin’s image of you.” Ten surely likes annoying the hell out younger more than he does to him.

“You know what? Leave us alone already and flirt where we can’t see you,” the younger dismissively said, not taking any more of the playful mocking he got for the day.

“Whatever Donghyuckie. You better come ‘cause I won’t be the only one that’ll be expecting you. And also, take care of Jaemin for me. Bye!” Not more was said and the couple left after making sure that they did everything they can to make Donghyuck come to Ten’s birthday party.

“Told you,” Jaemin said in a teasing voice as they were now left all alone, looking at his best friend all too knowingly.

However, Donghyuck just spared him a small glance before rolling his eyes, “shut up.”

Jaemin chuckled while following behind the other as he headed back to their classroom.

\--

 

After the bell rang as their afternoon classes had finally ended, both boys decided to go on straight home since Jaemin had been nagging about being sleepy and Donghyuck just had enough of it.

On their way out of campus, Donghyuck suddenly stopped on his tracks. “Shoot, I forgot my Math book at my desk!”

Jaemin tilted his head. “I thought we were given homework that we need to pass tomorrow?”

“We were! Aish,” he scratched the back of his neck in a rather frustrated matter before sighing. “I have to go back and get it.”

“Great,” the younger nodded. “Go get it then.”

“Come with me, Jaemin.”

“No way,” Jaemin protested, too lazy to go back and trace their steps. “You go on your own. I’ll just wait here.”

Donghyuck didn’t even bother on arguing with the other since he clearly had made up his mind, instead, the former made a run for it to retrieve his book back as fast as he could.

Jaemin quietly chuckled as he saw his friend hurriedly running back inside the school building.

Honestly, Jaemin hated to be kept waiting more than anything but the thought of going back inside when he was already outside wasn’t as appealing as the earlier choice so decided to just stay behind and let Donghyuck get his book on his own.

Tired from standing, Jaemin saw a tree close to where he was and figured he could sit down under it to shield off the irritating rays of sunlight that has been hitting his face.

The moment he sat down under the tree, he heard scratching sounds coming from above. He looked up to find out what could have cause such noise.

As from where Jaemin had sat on, he saw a tail dangling from the top of the tree.

It was a cat.

“What are you doing up there?” The cat was looking down on him with sparkling eyes, it was so cute! “Are you stuck?”

It meowed at him as a reply before it jumped down on the branch it was earlier sitting on.

 Jaemin stood up and came near the cat to pick it up and carry it like a baby. The cat purred as he held unto it and Jaemin broke into a big smile. The little cat was just so cute!

“You’re a very beautiful kitten,” he cooed. Jaemin was a sucker for such cute animals. “Do you have an owner?” he asked as he softly petted the cat, not wanting it to be afraid of him.

He was about to check its neck to see if it has a collar tied around it but it jumped away from his hold before he could do so.

Jaemin looked at it curiously.

“Why did you jump away from me? Do you not like me?” he asked the small feline.

It wasn’t like Jaemin was expecting an answer of some sort but he honestly didn’t imagine for the cat to just look at him with those pair of soft eyes, like as if it was expecting the male to pick it up and pet it on the head once more.

And so, he did. It was just so small and so cute that Jaemin just couldn’t resist.

He was busy petting the cat that he didn’t notice Donghyuck coming near him until he heard the latter shout.

“I’m back!” Donghyuck’s shout made the cat jolt; it jumped right out of Jaemin’s arms and hid to a place where they can’t see it anymore.

Jaemin glared at Donghyuck for shouting.

“Why are you glaring at me? I didn’t do anything wrong,” said the older, not understanding why his best friend was giving him that look.

Jaemin only sighed in response. Now the cat was gone.

However, something caught his eye that managed to pull him out of his dismay that the small and cute feline was gone and is nowhere to be seen.

“Is that Mark?” he blurted out, pointing at the two figures that where not far from where they stood. One of them clearly resembled to Mark, Jaemin was sure of it.

“You know you can’t fool me, Jaemin.” Donghyuck exclaimed, not believing the younger, thinking that he had too much teasing for one day.

“I’m not kidding, it really is him,” Jaemin tried telling him, he tried.

“Whatever, Na Jaemin. Let’s go.” and his best friend went on ahead him.

The younger male glanced once again to where Mark is walking before going after Donghyuck, punching him lightly on the shoulder for not waiting up for him when he caught up to the older.

The funny thing was; Jaemin wasn’t familiar with who Mark was walking besides with.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An update before exams start kicking in again, enjoy!

 

The moment when every person inside the locker room, except them, had gotten out of the area, immediately, Jaemin and Donghyuck would proceed to their respective lockers and hurriedly change into their physical education class attire.

“Donghyuck, I’m going to kill you if we arrive late just because of this again!” Jaemin exclaimed while putting on the last piece of clothing he needed to wear which were his favorite pair of white rubber shoes.

“Okay! Okay!” the older shouted as a retort, he was now pacing back and forth, trying to get dressed as well.

“Oh my god! Can’t you get any faster?!” the younger snapped.

“I am already moving faster than I should have been, you, you ungrateful person!”

“You’re the ungrateful one since you’re not moving fast enough when you should be since I waited with you for the others to leave the room just so you could change when I _should_ be at the gym right now!” he spoke so fast that Donghyuck swore the younger may have ran out of breath at his sudden outburst. “Whose fault do you think that is?!”

“YA! You should be thankful you’ve seen my body,” he answered back, glaring at the other, trying not to lose this rather irrational fight that they were once again having. “Only my family has seen it and yet here you are, you’ve seen all my glory. You should be proud that you did!”

The younger barely resisted the urge to roll his eyes. What was Donghyuck even saying? He was clearly out of context. “I am not Mark-hyung, so why would I be delighted upon seeing that…” Jaemin paused to spare Donghyuck a somewhat disgusted glance from head to toe, making the other slightly self-conscious of his self all of a sudden “… that body of yours?!” he snorted, arms wide open, gesturing towards the elder’s unimpressive — in Jaemin’s opinion, physique.  “And YA! Why did you stop moving?!”

“I am moving, okay?! And why did Mark’s name got dragged into this?!” he argued back, unfazed by the insults his best friend had thrown at him. If other people had said what Jaemin had in his face, it was going to be ugly, fist fight guaranteed. But it was Jaemin, and Donghyuck knows that the younger doesn’t mean half of what he says most of the time so he could live with that.

“Because you are definitely trying to act dense when you know perfectly well about it already!” Getting Donghyuck to listen was already a tough job on its own, let alone being able to persuade him from being less oblivious than he already is. “And finish changing already! Don’t stop moving slow poke!” Jaemin never failed to notice the elder’s movements as he seemed to have decelerated in the middle of putting on his shirt.

“I already told you I am moving! Are you blind?!”Having difficulty whilst putting on the piece of clothing, with one hand arm raised, Donghyuck tugged on the fabric, pulling it down as he decided to drop the topic about Mark already since he is well aware he’s going to lose both fights if he didn’t and the almighty Lee Donghyuck doesn’t accept defeat from any form of challenge laid out in front of him. “And can you please just shut up now?!”

“What?! You call that moving?! If you call that moving, then you move like a snail, Lee Donghyuck. Try moving faster like a rabbit or cheetah for once, okay?!” Jaemin sure is trying to corner the older in ways he knows that can’t backfire on him. “On a second thought, move like a cheetah instead, rabbits are cute, they don’t suit you.”

“Na Jaemin! Chill, okay? Chill!” It has only been a little under five minutes since they got inside the locker room and all Jaemin had been doing was shouting at him, and honestly, as much as he loves the younger— sometimes, it was deadly irritating. Donghyuck was attempting to somehow make Jaemin relax, to stop him from yelling in any way possible, but it looks like the younger just won’t calm down. “I get it already!”

“How can I chill when it’s taking you forever to tie that darn shoe?! What? Do you want me to tie your other shoe for you?!”

See?

But c’mon, let’s face it, this isn’t something new for them. This scene had become a usual occurrence that would happen every time they have their P.E class. Yeah, really.

Both would always wait for everyone to get out of the locker room because Donghyuck, for some reason, just doesn’t want to be inside a room that’s packed with other people when he gets changed. The moment they get in the said room, they’ll start shouting at each other — with Jaemin’s lead, of course, because P.E has always been a _thing_ for him. The latter just doesn’t want to be late for this class. As in like _never_.

“I can handle myself and I’m hurrying, can’t you see?!” the other roared back right at him, not bothering to look up, eyes fixed on tying the knot of his shoelaces.

“No you aren’t. Move faster!”

“I am almost finished! Stop shouting at me Na Jaemin!”

Jaemin huffed, arms crossed on his chest, annoyed at his turtle-like best friend for moving so freaking slow.

Everybody knows just how much Jaemin loves P.E. It was the only subject that the latter really enjoyed and causes him zero percent of stress, unlike their other subjects, but the very scene displayed in front of him every single time before the said class gives him undeniably huge amount of mental strain instead.

“I’m finished. Now, are you happy?” he asked the younger in an almost grouching way, standing immediately right up when he was done and dusted his shorts.

“Do you really need to ask that?” the younger raised a brow at his best friend before they hurriedly made their way towards the gym.

The moment they arrived, they saw their classmates warming up already at the side.

“See? We’re late!”

“Shut up.”

“This is entirely your fault,” Jaemin stated in a provoking manner, trying to get his best friend into another fight with him.

“I know it’s my fault Na Jaemin, but if you didn’t put me under time pressure, we wouldn’t have been late,” he reasoned. There is absolutely no way in a million years that Lee Donghyuck will back down in a verbal battle with Na Jaemin. Not gonna happen.

“So you’re telling me that it’s my fault that you move so slowly?” the younger asked as they made their way towards their classmates just across the room.

“We both know I have this kind of mechanism in my body that does the exact opposite of what has been asked of me when you’re putting me in a lot of pressure,” he further explained, trying to make his point. “Stop doing that.”

“So all this time you were doing that on purpose?!”

“I told you it’s a mechanism I have no control over; so basically, I’m not doing it on purpose, meaning, it’s mainly your fault we’re late,” he said, plainly putting out that it’s the younger’s responsibility, not his.

This was getting out of hand, and honestly, Jaemin has had enough of it already. As it pained his ego to do so, he slightly raised both of his hands in defeat as he sighed and shook his head, not wanting to continue this banter anymore. Getting into fights with Donghyuck was fine most of the time but on other occasions, it was just fruitless.

The gesture didn’t go unnoticed by older, which in return, made him gave the other a proud smirk as a sign of his victory— much to the younger’s annoyance that he glared right back at his best friend.

“Na Jaemin, what are you waiting for? I thought you hate being late for this class?”

“I hate you more,” was the last words the younger had said before he went straight to his classmates, leaving Donghyuck laughing to himself.

After a minute or so, the older followed where the former went to and stretched right beside him.

“It’s pretty crowded in here,” Donghyuck commented, noticing that there were double the numbers of students inside the gym than it usually has during their class.

Jaemin agreed. There were quite a lot of unfamiliar faces.

“Hey Chan,” he patted their classmate’s shoulder who was to his right, the closest one he could find. “Why are there a lot of people here?”

“Oh, the special class is having their P.E class with us. Their instructor had somewhere to be and our teacher had taken over his class for the day.”

He nodded slowly, digesting what has been said before thanking him.

“What did he say?” asked Jaemin when Donghyuck had finished his conversation with Chan, poking him on the shoulder.

“You didn’t hear what he told me?” he answered when he turned to face the younger, unbelief clear in his tone.

“Well duh, I wouldn’t ask if I did, would I?” with brows knitted together, his best friend stated in a matter of fact.

“Hmm, usually you’d eavesdrop,” Donghyuck shrugged then shortly uttered a silent “ouch” when he received a light punch on his shoulder, courtesy of Jaemin.

“I don’t. Now, tell me what he told you,” demanded the younger.

Donghyuck let out a short breath before resuming his almost forgotten stretching procedures. “Instructor’s out, special class is with us,” he abridged what their classmate told him, knowing fully that Jaemin would get it in an instant.

And he did. “The special class?” the younger asked, earning a nod from the older. Jaemin then broke into a smirk while staring at his best friend who was now on the floor when he finally understood the underlying thought of the statement. “Well isn’t it your lucky day, Donghyuck.”

Donghyuck snorted but not meeting his gaze. “Whatever.”

Every year level in their university had a special class. There isn’t a significant difference between the special and regular class in terms of curriculum or whatever. Well only that they were way smarter than the rest. And Mark was in the special class while Jaemin and Donghyuck were in the regular class.

With nothing left to do after doing some stretching, Jaemin allowed his gaze to travel around the full space of the gymnasium to see if there were other people there that he knew of aside from his classmates and Mark.

_Oh! I see Winwin-hyung and there is Chen Le, the child genius._

He let out a quiet chuckle towards how he labelled the younger— well, he really was undeniably smart for his age, before he continued on scanning the crowd.

“Oh look, it’s Mark-hyung,” the younger suddenly announced, finally spotted the familiar older male who was just across the room with his classmates and friends, chatting happily with them.

“So?” Donghyuck countered, rather uncaring. He didn’t have to know that the older was there. He really didn’t care.

But Jaemin knew better.

He saw the other sparing Mark a small glance in the corner of his eyes before looking right back at him. Jaemin giggled. Donghyuck sucks at acting oblivious. “Stop pretending, I know you care.”

“What are you saying? Do I look like I care?” a simper plastered on the elder’s face.

_Huh! This guy’s ignorance about his feelings is unbelievable!_

Disregarding his friend’s denial words, Jaemin silently observed him and how his eyes would wander around the area where Mark was every now and then before looking away, acting like he wasn’t even caught staring in the first place.

The younger shook his head lightly and snickered at how exceptionally bad the guy was— bad at pretending of ignoring the presence of the older. Seeing all of this happening in front of him, Jaemin made a mental note to lock both of these hopeless lads together in a room one day.

_I’m sure Donghyuck will get angry if I do, but who cares? He’ll be happy anyway._

He then shrugged at the thought while his gaze slowly manoeuvred itself unconsciously and landed on those who were beside the older male, his fellow peers.

Jaemin tilted his head, curiously looking over to where Mark and his friends were. He easily identified Winwin and Chen Le from before, who were engrossed in a conversation with Mark. However, another quite unfamiliar face, which was also with them, caught his attention.

He saw that boy again.

“Hey, Donghyuck,” he called for the older.

“What?” the latter responded.

“Who’s that guy?”

“Where?” he asked again, not knowing where the sudden question came from.

“There, the one besides M— ”

“JAEMIN, DONGHYUCK, THE GAME IS GOING TO BEGIN! WE NEED YOU GUYS OVER HERE!” a rather loud voice from across the room shouted.

Both boys flinched at the mention of their names echoing inside the gym. Seriously, they didn’t need any more attention than they already have, thank you very much. Distracted by the call made, Jaemin just closed his mouth and forgot about his question for a second there.

“What were you asking again?” Donghyuck asked him, curious of what his best friend was being inquisitive about before they were interrupted.

He knows that Jaemin never really throws second looks at people he doesn’t know of or those that have not been introduced to him properly unless he’s curious or interested about them.

“Huh? Uh, never mind that for now, I’ll ask you later,” he answered, disregarding the question thrown at him.

Donghyuck made a quirky expression, following closely behind the younger’s back who was now heading towards the center on the court for he would be playing in the first set of the volleyball match.

“Hmmm…” he searched the multitude around him for prospects, for someone who might have caught his best friend’s attention.

“Maybe it’s him? Hmm… nah! _He’s_ popular, who doesn’t know him? But, maybe it’s really him? I don’t know though… Maybe it’s really him… Aish, who else would it be then? Jaemin, who is it?” Donghyuck mumbled to himself, trying hard to figure out who’s the person that his best friend was asking about.

“DONGHYUCK, GET OVER HERE THIS INSTANT!” their team captain shouted for him when he saw that the former still hasn’t gotten into his position yet since he too would be playing alongside Jaemin and their team.

Pouting because he never got to comprehend fully who’s the guy the younger was talking about, he thought,

  _Eh, he’ll probably ask again later. I’m sure of that._

He fastened his pace and went to the left edge at their side of the court before their good-for-nothing captain blows another fuse at him. What is it with people and why were they shouting at him a lot today? And before they knew it, the whistle was blown and the first serve was made.

For the whole duration of their class period, as they were busy battling in and out to win the game, Jaemin never got the chance to ask Donghyuck again who that boy besides Mark was.

So maybe, just maybe, Jaemin won’t forget to ask Donghyuck a little more about it later.

\--

 

The assumption that smart people preferred studying and rotting in their rooms, reading books rather than playing sports and getting down and dirty on the field was a big lie. The special class that Jeno was in are thrilled at the idea of being able to do sports and recreational activities.

Now, today was one of those very unusual days. Their P.E instructor was on official leave for a week because of an important matter and the special class was forced to share their time allocated for P.E with the regular class that their substitute teacher was also teaching. But they didn’t mind, they liked the company of other people besides the usual presence of their classmates anyway.

After receiving specific instructions, both classes went to the designated place their teacher had put them in line with the activity that they would be doing that day. The regular class would be playing volleyball while Jeno’s class would be playing basketball at the opposite side of the gym. Only the boys on both classes would be playing that day due to their large number that their substitute instructor wouldn’t be able to accommodate them all if the girls would join in.

All the males in their class huddled and began separating themselves into two teams. Mark and Jeno were put into the same team and the younger of the two, who was pretty psyched out of playing again after he got sick but didn’t showed it as much, was picked as one of the starting players for their team. The latter was good at sports too.

“Hey, point guard post is definitely yours,” the younger stated, intended for his best friend who was standing beside him. However a few seconds had passed and he didn’t get a reply from the older. Gazing at his right, he saw that the other wasn’t paying attention and had his head turned. He appears to be looking at something from a distance with a soft smile on his face.

“What are you smiling at?”

Mark seemed to have snapped out of his trance at the sudden question, eyes widen, turning to face the younger beside him. “N-nothing,” he shortly replied, shuttering.

Jeno tilted his head questioningly, watching the older nibble on his lower lip but not one word came out from him after. It was a small habit that the older had but Jeno saw it. Mark was really a terrible liar.

He glanced over where Mark had his sight fixed on and saw a familiar person near the stands just near the volleyball court, across the room. Jeno smiled at what he saw before looking back at Mark, shaking his head at his ridiculous friend. “Can’t you be less predictable?”

“What do you mean man?”

“You wear your emotions on your sleeves.”

“How so?” the other asked, walking down to the basketball court since their appointed team captain had gestured for them to gather at their side because the game was about to begin any time now.

They settled down at a corner, stretching their limbs to condition their body to avoid any possible cramps on court.

Jeno gave him a shrug before crossing his arms in front of his chest to stretch them. “You’re so obvious. Are you aware of that?”

“I know,” Mark mumbled in a soft voice that Jeno almost didn’t caught. Wait, was Mark being conscious all of a sudden?

He looked right at him, Mark had his head bowed. Still the younger waited— waited for the older to meet his gaze, to search the other’s face, looking for a certain emotion trailing in his features, to help the younger comprehend the situation better. And there he saw it; a sudden flicker in the elder’s eyes when he looked up, it was brief and fast as it came and disappeared but Jeno saw it nonetheless. “You’re really serious about this,” another soft smile threatening to break into his face.

“What?”

“Don’t act dumb,” he started. “You know what I mean.”

“What to do think?”

The younger was unsure at first cause being Mark’s friend for a long time, he knows him the best yet there were times when he didn’t.

However, the expression Mark had worn told Jeno otherwise, and without a single word being said, he understood. He gave the older an encouraging nod and in return, Mark’s lips slowly curled upward to form a smirk. That was better.

Sometimes, words weren’t needed to understand.

They continue stretching in silence with smiles both painted on their faces as a sign of complete understanding towards one another.

 _He knows what he is doing, that, I am sure of. He’s Mark anyway,_ said Jeno in his thoughts.

“Hey guys, game’s about to start in a minute, finish what you’re doing and get to your positions,” the team captain announced to the team when everything, including the team’s line up was finally decided.

A minute passed by quickly and both boys got into position, Jeno as the small forward and Mark as the point guard. The whistle from the referee was blown simultaneously as he tossed the ball for the jump ball; signalling the start of the friendly match.

Mark was being obvious because the one he had his sights on was the most oblivious human being to have ever walked the earth and Jeno knew his best friend has his work cut out for him.

\--

 

The lunch bell rang just in the middle of their third set, the game ended just a little too early in Jaemin’s liking. Both teams were tied, one set each, and most to their surprise, Jaemin’s team were behind a few points in the third set and the younger was so confident that they would be able to catch up if they had the time.

After showering, getting dressed and everything else they did to make their selves fresh again after the rather tiring and sweaty game of volleyball, Donghyuck headed straight for the rooftop to look for Jaemin when he noticed that the younger was out of sight. They usually stay at the rooftop if they have spare time to kill and apparently Donghyuck’s earlier guess was right, Jaemin was really there when he opened the usually locked door— since the place was prohibited for students to use during class hours, sulking on the corner, near the railings.

“Good game.” Donghyuck had sat onto the floor besides the younger, handed him a bottle of water he had conveniently brought to cool down his nerves if ever. “You did great out there.”

“Easy for you to say, we lost,” he responded in a dead pan tone without looking up, took the bottle from the older and drank a sip before he snorted; clearly still feeling sour about the game.

“We didn’t. The third set wasn’t done when the bell rang.”

But the younger didn’t listen and let out a snort breathe in frustration instead. “This sucks, if only we had more time.”

Donghyuck sighed as he shook his head; trying to understand the younger’s unreasonable sentiments before he turn to face him. Jaemin has always been the competitive type when it comes to sports. He takes everything too seriously; losing and winning. Sure, after the game, he would still be full of smiles, thanking their team, saying they did a good job. But when they would be alone, just the two of them, like right now, he would sulk to no end. And honestly, Donghyuck’s patience has a limit as well— believe it or not.

“Guess you’re not that good at every sport like you claim to be.”

Jaemin threw him a look of pure disgust. “Gee, that makes me feel a lot better.”

He shrugged dismissively, unaffected. “Only here to help.”

The younger nudged him rather forcefully at the shoulder as a reply. “What would I do _without_ you Donghyuck? You really are my _best friend_.”

Donghyuck wasn’t really cut out for stuff like this.

“Whatever,” the older retorted. “And stop being like this Nana,” he said, in a more serious tone this time. “It’s not your fault. It’s just not your lucky day. And truthfully, one game doesn’t define who you are as a sports junky. Everyone has to be a loser some point in their life, even you, it’s completely normal.”

 Only Lee Donghyuck is capable of voicing out words that could both cheer and piss you at the same time, seriously. He is a pro at it. But nonetheless, Jaemin was astounded. The elder’s word — as weird and rude they may sound at a different circumstance, appeared to have brighten up his mood, even by a little bit.

“Thanks,” he simply replied, a soft smile slowly creeping into his face despite not wanting to show Donghyuck that he appreciated the small pep talk. “But don’t call me Nana, only Ten-hyung is allowed that call me that.”

“Whatever you say, Na Jaemin.”

He playfully made faces while he mimicked Donghyuck’s words which made him laugh softly; releasing the bad vibes he had locked up inside of him earlier.

Donghyuck looked at him in return, quite happy that he had managed to make Jaemin laugh again. Jaemin was more fun to be with when he wasn’t a dickhead most of the time anyway.

But there was this lingering thought that had been bothering Donghyuck to no end as he was staring at the younger’s pleased expression.

_Ask me what you wanted to ask earlier Na Jaemin!_

He wanted to voice out his thoughts but he didn’t since he was waiting for the younger to ask him again instead. Had he forgotten about it already?

Jaemin on the other hand, completely forgetting about his question to Donghyuck, remained quiet with no queries in mind.

Not being able to contain his nosiness to himself, Donghyuck finally probed, “Hey, what was it you were asking earlier?”

“Huh?” Jaemin, lost for a moment, gathered his thoughts.

“You know, that thing before the game?” the older even gestured with his hands, trying to help his best friend recall.

“Oh, that!” the younger exclaimed upon remembering what the older was talking about.

“Yes, that!” the older smiled at first cause finally, he remembered, but immediately redeemed it. “Now, what is it?”

“Who’s the guy—”

“The guy?” Donghyuck, fascinated in every word Jaemin says, cuts him off to ask again.

Not liking the sudden rise of interest in the elder’s voice when he interrupted, Jaemin frowned. “Will you let me finish my question before you say anything else?” the younger asked fast, knowing that he will be cut short if he talked slow and he hates it every time Donghyuck does.

“Yeah, yeah. Sure, go on,” the older waved his hand, urging the younger to continue, excitement unmistakeable on his voice.

Jaemin blinked at the older. _He’s weird today_ , he commented on his best friend’s actions.

“Okay. I was wondering, who was the guy that’s mostly with Mark-hyung earlier?” Jaemin managed to ask without any sign of further hesitation. “You know, at the gym?”

“With Mark? At the gym?”

“Yeah, pretty much.”

 _Mostly. Guy._ Several thoughts started flooding Donghyuck’s mind as he thoughtfully tapped his chin, then a certain person’s face popped out of nowhere and it became clear to the older who the younger was asking about. “Oh, the one with the light brown hair?”

Jaemin nodded, remembering fully that the guy really did have brown silky hair when he saw him.

“You don’t know him?” the older asked, disbelief trailing in his voice.

“Why? Should I?” the younger wondered. Jaemin had a good memory, he had to admit, but however, the guy who was in the center of their conversation was someone he really didn’t know of and honestly, it bugged him. Jaemin was friendly and had a lot of friends, so it was weird he didn’t know who that guy was when he was clearly a close friend of Mark’s.

“Oh my goodness Na Jaemin, everyone knows him!” Donghyuck exclaimed like it was so damn obvious and Jaemin was a fool for not knowing.

“Sorry?” the younger said, unsure why his best friend was acting the way he did. “Is this a big deal?” Was he an important person anyway?

“Not really, it just shocked me.” Giggling, Donghyuck stood up, patted his pants that had dust on them, silently cursing under his breath regrets on sitting on the dirty floor without cleaning it first.

“Where are you going now?” the younger had to ask when the older suddenly rose up.

“Oh, I borrowed Mark’s Math notebook as a guide for our assignment. I promised to return it today,” he easily explained with a shrug. “Just head on back to the classroom without me.”

Jaemin couldn’t believe his ears. “You borrowed Mark-hyung’s notebook?” he clarified, clearly sounded surprised. “For real?”

“Why?” the older titled his head as he asked questioningly. “I couldn’t understand a lot about our previous lessons and luckily, he’s a Math Whiz. What’s wrong with asking a little help?”

“Is that all that you really are going to do Lee Donghyuck? Asking help for homework?” his voice full of mischief as he spoke such words, he even wiggled his brows at the older. “Nothing more?”

The older turned to face his best friend just see a teasing smile ghosting on Jaemin’s face which made him frown in response. The younger was implying something different than what Dnghyuck had in mind here. “What else would I do?”

“Just don’t do anything bad, ok?” Jaemin reminded as the older had taken a few steps forward, attempting to walk away from the conversation that was bound to take place.

 _What would make him shut up?_ Donghyuck, before he left, thought. He ended up slightly turning his head, sparing the younger a smirk before he declared, “By the way, that guy’s name you were asking? His name is Jeno. Lee Jeno.”

And Donghyuck was gone before Jaemin could think of a comeback or something.

Hearing what the older had said, just before he left, the latter’s lips slowly curled up to form a small smile at the thought of a certain brown haired male he now knew the name of.

_Jeno huh? Hmmm._

What a cute name though, he thought.

\--

 

When Donghyuck came into the special class’ room a little before lunch time was over was pretty convenient— since only Jeno and Mark were there, yet still rather peculiar since the younger doesn’t ordinarily does things like that.

“Hey Jeno,” the younger greeted when he entered the room, the older being the first person that he saw as he was inside the area.

The latter was shocked at the younger’s presence at first before giving him a small smile as a reply when he faced him, eyes crinkled up to crescent moon-like shapes like they always do whenever he grins. “Hi Donghyuck. How have you been?”

 _Okay, now I know why Jaemin asked about him in the first place,_ Donghyuck said in his thoughts.

The latter neared the elder’s desk, standing right in front of the wooden table. “Hey don’t give me that kind of smile Jeno. If you keep looking like you’re so happy to see me, I think I might actually fall in love with you,” he said in a rather playful and flirt-ish tenor, followed closely by a sudden smirk he had plastered on his face.

Looking up, Jeno brought his hand to his mouth, muffling out soft chuckles at the rather silly words the other had said. “Please don’t Donghyuck-sshi, somebody might murder me in my sleep if you do fall for me.”

“Who would do that?” he replied, faking trying to sound outraged. “You’re a beauty no one would allow to vanish from this world,” he stated in a matter of fact which only made Jeno laugh completely, who now didn’t resist the impulse to do so.

“Tell Mark that sometimes for me, will you?”

“I think I will.”

Jeno let out another breathy chuckle. Donghyuck smiled in triumphed at the scene in front of him, proud for being able to make the older laugh like he had.

Teasing Jeno has always been this satisfying for Donghyuck, he takes it really well and will only smile or laugh as a response. And the younger would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought that Jeno’s smile was beautiful at some point because it really was. Jeno’s smile was just so contagious and so bright that it could—

“By the way, speaking of Mark, where is he?” the younger suddenly asked, realizing that he hasn’t seen the older male when he entered the room.

“Here,” answered a voice, somewhat cold, from behind him.

Donghyuck literally jumped at the sound. “Do you plan on giving me a heart attack?!” he huffed, turning around, hands clenching the fabric of his shirt that was around the chest area. “Don’t scare me like that!”

Mark only gave him a shrug, was a desk away from where they were, leaning back casually against it. Why hadn’t Donghyuck noticed him when he went inside? “I wasn’t, I’m just only making my presence known to you, that is,” he replied in monotone. The eldest male’s voice didn’t sound as placid as it usually is when conversing with him and it was really out of the ordinary. Something was wrong with Mark but the younger decided to just brush the thought aside.

“Gosh, why do you have your brows knitted together like that? It doesn’t suit you,” he blurted out, noticing that Mark seemed quiet unhappy at the moment. And without beating the bush, he went near to where he stood and reached for the elder’s forehead. “Here, let me straighten that out for you.”

Feeling the younger’s fingertips softly touched his temples, Mark froze. Surprised by Donghyuck’s rather bold actions, he did not move a muscle, every foreign feeling he just felt subsided after a few seconds from the warmth emitted by the former’s fingers at the sudden contact.

“There. That looks better.” Donghyuck took a step back, withdrawing his hands, smiling in satisfaction upon seeing the crease leave Mark’s forehead because of what he did.

Silence then spread all throughout the room.

Jeno shook his head lightly at the rather innocent display of affection shown in front of him. He even saw how their fingers somewhat brushed against each other before they made a small distance away between them.

He saw Donghyuck slightly fidget before handing Mark what seemed like a black school notebook that Jeno easily recognized as the elder’s Math notebook, shoving it in the latter’s chest. “Here’s your notebook. Thanks for letting me borrow it by the way.” The younger shifted his weight from one foot to the other, displaying a sign of embarrassment that Jeno rarely sees in him. This is honestly amusing, Jeno decided.

“Uh, yeah. Sure. No problem at all.” Mark smiled while staring intensely at Donghyuck which honestly made the younger conscious.

The youngest among the three then cleared his throat to throw aside whatever weird feeling he is experiencing at the moment. “Guys, I have something to tell you,” he suddenly said, looking at Mark before sparing Jeno a look as well, grinning widely at the other two. “Some news you would be fascinated in.”

“What news?” Jeno asked with interest, not minding the sudden change of topic.

“The funniest thing had happened today,” Donghyuck started. “Jaemin asked me a very weird question just a few minutes ago.”

“Jaemin?” the eldest asked, sitting on one of the desk nearest to him, arms wrapping around his chest, intrigued at the mention of the younger’s name. “What did he ask?”

“He wanted to know who you were with earlier,” he said, intended for Mark.

“Earlier?” Mark repeated. What kind of question was that? “I wasn’t with anyone else earlier besides Jeno, swear!” he suddenly defended himself because somehow he felt accused of something he didn’t do.

Donghyuck raised a bemused brow at Mark. “Why do you seem like you’re getting defensive out of nowhere?” And Mark grew silent, definitely caught off guard.

Chuckling, Jeno knew the reason why Mark was like that but didn’t add anything since he was disregarded by the two males in front of him. And honestly, he didn’t want to come in between this two. His life was peaceful just the way it was and he preferred it to stay like that.

“I’m not. I’m just, yeah, I’m just saying that I was with Jeno almost all of the time earlier,” the older explained himself a minute later after recovering.

It was Donghyuck’s turn to cross his arms, giving Mark a sceptical glare. “Really?”

“Yeah. So, what’s funny about Jaemin asking who I was with earlier?” the older inquired, dismissing the topic before Donghyuck dug in any deeper than he should have, curious.

Donghyuck sighed. And Mark was thankful that the younger chose to leave it be and said, “Apparently, he doesn’t know who Jeno is.”

“What?” Mark responded in utter suspicion at the assertion. “Seriously?”

The younger nodded. “Weird isn’t it?”

“That’s, that’s actually quite cool and weird all at the same time!” Mark bursted out laughing at probably the most absurd thing he heard for that day, not entirely believing it even though it came from Donghyuck’s mouth. How can he? Who doesn’t know who Jeno is?

“Believe it or not, Jaemin doesn’t know who Jeno was until I told him earlier.”

“Guess you’re not that famous as you thought you are man.” Mark turned to look at his best friend who was still comfortably sitting on his desk, and gave him a mocking look. “Can you believe this?”

Not minding their fuss about his popularity since he doesn’t really care about stuff like that, Jeno only focused on one thing that he clearly heard.

“Who’s Jaemin?” he asked, looking at Mark with innocent and curious eyes.

Both turned to look at the former male who was looking up at them, blinking his eyes that clearly said that Jeno wasn’t lying or anything. Mark sighed while Donghyuck ran a hand down his face.

“Not you too,” mumbled the younger.

Jeno questioningly gave them a look, not comprehending their reactions.

“Jeno, I get the part that you might not know who Jaemin is, but I want you to know that he’s good at sports and he has the looks and is popular with girls too,” explained Donghyuck out of the blue.

“Okay?” was his response. Why was he telling Jeno all of these again?

“And he’s always together with Donghyuck,” understanding where Donghyuck was going with this instantly, Mark added. “Just so you’ll know.”

Kind of lost as to how the conversation went that way, Jeno just took note of what was told of him and nodded to satisfy the two.

“It’s just that, I hear his name sometimes especially when I walk around or play on the field but I haven’t really seen him and how he looks,” Jeno clarifies about what he means by his previous question.

 _He’s even worse than the other. At least, Jaemin knows him now. I gotta let them meet. As in, ASAP!_ Donghyuck thought while he stares at the brown haired male.

“It’s okay,” the youngest said. “You’ll meet him someday soon Jeno, count on that,” Donghyuck then gave him a smile that was roughly in between a cunning and a sincere one. “I have go back to class now, lunch break’s almost ending. Jaemin’s probably looking for me.”

The two just watched Donghyuck’s retreating back as he left the room before saying goodbye and thanking the boys for their time.

“Take care,” Mark managed to say before the younger was completely gone which granted him a soft smile from the latter as a reply.

Mark had a goofy grin on his face after that; even after the bell rang and he went to his seat besides his best friend when their classmates came flooding back to the room since lunch was over.

“What is he smiling about?” was the first thing Winwin asked when he got in the room and saw Mark, finding the whole picture of their friend smiling for no reason whatsoever quiet creepy.

“Has he finally lost it?” Chen Le added as well but went unnoticed by the other and just continued staring into oblivion.

Both boys gave Jeno a questioning look before he gave them a shrug in return, telling them he had no idea why Mark was being like that.

Instead of listening to class like he really should be when their teacher came in, Jeno was looking outside the window, chin resting against his palm, distracted not only by the conversation that they just had with Donghyuck, but also by a sudden realization that came to mind.

Apparently, he had an idea how Jaemin looks like yet he’s not entirely sure of it.

Silently, he’s hoping that the picture he has in mind is the Jaemin that both Mark and Donghyuck were talking about.

Being in one university campus, it’s inevitable to have crossed paths with each other before. But admit it or not, there comes a point in your life when you do not actually ask a question about a person who catches your eye at times; times like these happen to Jeno too.

Then, a smile suddenly crept into his face at the recall of a certain memory he had of a male who he saw petting a cat down at the university grounds a few days ago when he just got back.

_Cute._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

**Acads got us stressed to the point that we don't get decent sleep anymore and we were only able to finish this chapter cause we had a one week break from school, all thanks to our uni's sports fest and halloween. Enjoy and comments are loved! ^^**

 

Jeno leaned back against his chair, a soft huff escaped his lips as he looked up to the ceiling of his room, digesting the fact that he just finished another beautifully written book from his shelf, the imagery of the unforeseen ending still lingering in the back of his mind. He was in peace, in solitude, and surrounded by nothing but the endless pit of possibilities, of fancies he is confronted with when engrossed in reading. The latter really enjoyed quiet moments like this.

But… nothing lasts forever.

After some time, every thought he had about the book, even the most quotable lines the protagonist said immediately left him when a knock coming from outside his door distracted his usual train of thought.

He stared at the wooden door for a while, quite confused as to why would someone disturb him at – he glanced over the part of his room where a wall clock is conveniently hanged– 4:47 on a Saturday afternoon.

Curious for the reason of the sudden intrusion, he sighed.

“Do come in,” he said loud enough to be heard from the other side of his room.

A familiar face of a middle aged man properly dressed in a tuxedo, wearing matching polished black shoes and white gloves on his hands had slowly opened the door and smiled apologetically at Jeno for the younger had an unpleased expression written on his face.

“Jeno, young sir, I’m sorry to disturb you, but you have visitors downstairs,” told the head butler of their household after he bowed as a greeting.

He tilted his head to the side at the statement.

What visitors?

As he was about to speak his reply, he saw his best friend together with Chen Le and Winwin pepping from behind the butler’s back, waving at him with wide smiles on their faces.

Oh, that visitors.

“Actually, we’re already upstairs Mr. Lim. But thank you for going through the trouble of telling Jeno we’re here.” Mark sneered as he dodged the elder’s rather large form and entered Jeno’s room without notice and much care for he already felt at home, patting the older man’s back lightly. Mr. Lim could only return the grin with a nod and a familiar smile. Mark was practically family after all.

Jeno sighed once again, shook his head before he smiled right after.

“Mr. Lim, thank you for informing me about this unannounced visit,” he said, stressing the word ‘unannounced’ for his friends to hear. “Could you be kind enough to prepare some snacks for our guests here?

“Absolutely. I will tell the chef right away.”

Jeno was satisfied. He nodded his head. “Thank you Mr. Lim. You may go now,” he told the man politely, showing his gratitude for what he had done for him.

Mr. Lim bowed again before he took his exit, leaving the four to themselves as he quietly closed the door behind him.

And as by cue, Chen Le rushed and dropped himself into Jeno’s kings’ sized bed in one nook of the room. It was the first thing he saw in the room and was tempted to dump his body on it the minute he laid his sights on it.

“So soft,” the youngest purred as he buried himself into the soft mattress and mountains of pillows that Jeno had.

“Yah Lele, you’ll get your outfit all crooked,” Mark scolded the younger. But Chen Le didn’t listen, enjoying the softness and the apparent vanilla scented fragrance of the sheets beneath him.

“What are you guys doing here this early? The party isn’t until 7 in the evening right?” Jeno felt the necessity to ask after seeing how the three guys who were in his room were currently dressed, not minding what Chen Le was doing to his bed, putting the book he had finished reading on a small table to his right.

One cannot say that what they are wearing is somewhat all over the top but it also isn’t close enough to the usual casual clothes that would typically wear for a plain Saturday afternoon just to pay him a visit.

Mark was wearing a denim jacket above a plain white shirt, tight fitting washed ripped jeans and a pair of the latest Nike Air limited edition white shoes. Winwin was sporting a red camouflage-designed sweatshirt, also in tight jeans— highlighting his slender legs, and a pair of brown timberland combat shoes. Before the youngest dived into his bed, Jeno had caught a quick glance of what Chen Le was wearing. He wore simpler clothes if compared to the two before him. He had put on a white hoodie, black denim shorts and black vans paired off with long white socks. It looked comfortable yet still cool in the way the younger carried his self.

Therefore, Jeno concluded that they were already dressed for Ten’s party that was still hours away.

“Yeah Mark, what are we doing here again?” asked Chen Le when he pushed himself back up from the elder’s bed to turn to them, after realizing that he doesn’t know why they are at Jeno’s in the first place aside from his and Winwin’s own personal reason of being there.

Truth be told, Winwin and Chen Le tagged along with Mark as an excuse only to see where Jeno lived, because even if they’ve been classmates and friends for years already, they’ve never actualy had the chance to see and be inside his house even once. Today was their perfect opportunity.

“I asked the both of you to tag along for a very important reason. We’re here to do this young man a favor,” Mark stated with a smug look on his face as he gestured at his best friend.

Winwin just shrugged when Jeno questioningly turned to him, asking for an explanation since Mark will probably give him none, then the older asked, “So, what do we need to do?”

“We need to make Jeno look good for tonight’s party,” he told them as he walked towards Jeno’s walk in closet.

“But hyung already looks good,” Chen Le said in a matter of fact as stood up and followed behind Mark.

“Better then,” the older corrected. “Better than the usual Jeno.”

“Uh, question. Why does Jeno need to look good anyway? I mean better?” asked the oldest inside room who decided to sit on the bed Chen Le was at earlier, rather than trailing behind to where the other two had went off to.

“Duh, hyung. It’s obviously to impress someone we probably know of since Mark here wants Jeno-hyung dressed up for the party.” The youngest then came out, together with different hanged clothes on his hands that he had hand-picked from the array of clothes Jeno had inside his enormous wardrobe, clearly telling the latter that they had started rummaging inside his closet before he hurriedly went back inside, softly mumbling that he had forgotten something.

“Really? Who’s the lucky one, Jeno?” the eldest had to ask. “Why do we not know anything about it?” Winwin was hyped up all of a sudden; he was honestly surprised at what the youngest had said. Jeno is not really the type to be interested about another person so quickly.

To be honest, Winwin really didn’t like Jeno when he met the latter a few years back unlike Mark and Chen Le. The reason why he thinks like that is because the younger male, with crescent moon-like shaped eyes when he smiles and a timid personality, appeared to be a cold person when they first met. Jeno was reserved and mindful of his words and Winwin wasn’t like that at all, somehow, their personalities seemed to clash.  But as time passed by and he got to know the real Lee Jeno, his impression on him changed. For the older, Jeno was really caring about others, soft spoken and tends to be quite most of the time. But when you stare into his eyes if you got the chance like Winwin had, one will think otherwise. He’s really kind, really. But it still gets to Winwin sometimes how guarded Jeno is, heedful of other people, and that he will only let a few in his defences. And Winwin was glad he was one of them. So it is such a big of a deal and relief to him to know that the younger male was interested in someone. Finally, Jeno was warming to other people aside from his usual group of friends.

This was just his opinion of Jeno though; Winwin can’t really say nor do anything about it.

“Huh?” answered Jeno, not entirely sure what his friends were talking about, their words sounded alien to his ears.

“Come on, there’s no need to be shy Lee Jeno. Just tell us who it is,” pursued Winwin.

The younger opened his mouth to say something but closed it again. He really wasn’t sure what to tell when he himself didn’t even know what they meant.

“Hey Jeno! Come over here!” called Mark from inside his closet, which made the former heave a soft sigh in relief, glad to be able to escape Winwin’s searching gaze and curious questions.

The moment he got in his closet, an arguing Mark and Chen Le in the middle of the room welcomed him.

“This should be the one Jeno-hyung should wear since his style is rather simple yet sophisticated,” retorted Chen Le.

“Then this should be what he’ll wear to catch people’s attention. They’re not used to him wearing this, it’ll catch them off guard,” countered the older.

“No hyung, this should be the one!”

“Listen to me, Lele. THIS is what he should wear.”

“No, THIS!”

“THIS!”

“I SAID, THIS HYUNG!”

“NO LELE, THIS!”

And because Lee Jeno knew that there would be no stop to this nonsense bickering, he went on and grabbed the tops that both had chosen; a zebra skin patterned long-sleeved polo and a not so simple but kind of classy looking black sweatshirt. He then went to a corner where more clothes were hanged and grabbed a pair of black ripped jeans that he thinks will suit the outfit that he has in mind, and proceeded to where his numerous collection of shoes where put, shelves after shelves against a wall and snatched the first pair of white shoes that he saw.

“Can both of you please go out? I’m going to change,” he requested at his still arguing friends to make them stop before they get on each other’s faces.

They stood still for a second, to look at Jeno, blinked cluelessly at him before they went outside and continued arguing in whispers.

He sighed as he watched the two leave the area for him to dress in peace.

_Why do they need to make such effort just to dress me up for the party again? To impress someone? And who could that someone be?_

He sighed once again at the thought and it made him think about how many times he had sighed that day since his friends arrived. Having a normal, noise-free day just seemed impossible if one has friends like those three outside the room. But Jeno didn’t mind, he liked them and was prepared to suffer the consequence of having a non-peaceful life if it means having them around.

 As he finally finished changing into the clothes he had picked, he viewed his reflection in the mirror and judged how he looked.

 _Hmm, not bad and it looks casual enough for a party,_ he said in his mind as he eyed himself in every possible angle.

It’s not that he doesn’t dress up often; he does if it is required of him, but if it doesn’t, he will just simply wear something that he thinks is appropriate for the occasion. He doesn’t really care of what others think of him, and if he does at times, he doesn’t take it to heart unlike other people would. Jeno was his own man; other than Mark, he knew who he was, better than anyone after all.

He studied his outfit one more time, trying to figure out if it really does suit him since he doesn’t want Mark to nag him into changing one more time if the older deemed his attire to be unfitting.

After deciding that it looks fine on him and deciding against the idea of styling his hair since it appears neat just the way as it is, without further ado, he immediately went out of the closet to let his friends see how he looked.

The moment he was out in the open for his friends to see what he had come up with; they suddenly stopped talking to gawk at him.

(A/N: Wtf our kid looks so handsome here asdfghjkl)

And boy was he handsome.

He opened his arms and even bothered to turn around in circles for them to clearly see what he was wearing before he faced the three, spared them a small smile and asked, “How do I look?”

A minute or so had passed but still nobody said anything, they just kept on looking at him. Jeno then cleared his throat to get them back to their senses because he was getting pretty awkward with the gazes they had on him.

After being momentarily amazed at his best friend’s rather surprising transformation, Mark jokingly wolf whistled and said, “Dang man. You look gorgeous. You won’t really get unnoticed by anyone for sure. But if you do, they’re no longer human.”

Jeno was used to being called handsome or attractive by a lot of people before, it wasn’t actually new for him. But he would be lying if he said he still doesn’t get flustered when someone compliments him every now and then. He rubbed the back of his nape embarrassingly, causing Mark to sneer at him. “Thanks?”

“Hyung, can you be my boyfriend instead?” Chen Le blurted out of the blue, still stunned and had his mouth slightly agape, eyes gleaming at the older. “You’re really handsome.”

“No Lele, you already have my cousin,” Jeno chuckled at what the younger was implying before he came to him and ruffled his hair a bit. “He’ll be sad if he heard you say that I was more attractive than he is.”

“But you are,” Chen Le pouted which only made the latter let out another breathy chuckle. “Don’t tell him I said that though.”

“Sleek. Not bad guys,” commented the oldest, who also couldn’t help but admire the younger. Jeno had always been eye-catching, but today, he was dangerously striking and he just changed his clothes! “I’m sure that person you’ve had your eyes on will fall for you immediately after seeing you tonight.”

“No doubt with that hyung,” Mark retorted, a proud grin on his face as he had his arms crossed.

“Uh, so who am I trying to impress again?” Jeno asked, still completely unknowledgeable about what they have been talking about since earlier.

“Really, Jeno? Really?” Mark asked, not entirely sure if he heard his best friend right.

Jeno shrugged, looking rather curious and only nodded which made Mark run a hand down on his face.

“Do you remember the one we talked about last week with—?” before the older could finish, Jeno cut him off.

“Oh, that? Before lunch time was over? The –”

“Yes my friend. That.”

After hearing Mark say those words, a picture of a familiar guy came to his mind which made his lips curl up a little to form a small smile. Even though he does not really know who this Jeamin was that Mark had been talking about and what he really looks like, he still hopes it was the one he saw and imagined to be.

On the other note, Chen Le and Winwin exchanged puzzled looks to each other; both are lost as to what Mark and Jeno are talking about for they gave no chance to finish the other’s sentence. They do not know if they were doing this intentionally or is it because of the deep understanding they share that words don’t need to be said and sentences don’t need to be finished for the both of them to understand what the latter and former meant.

“Well, come on downstairs guys, I’m sure they had prepared something for us to eat already.” Jeno said in a very unusual lively tone. And the sudden boost in his energy and demeanour was clearly evident and noticeable that it made Mark raise an eyebrow, Chen Le’s brows to almost meet, and Winwin’s mouth to form a ‘o’, who immediately understood the reason of this hasty change in Jeno but didn’t voice it out loud.

 _Someone might be in love_ , Winwin thought while looking at the younger’s back as they went out of the latter’s room, amused at the thought.

As they made their way downstairs, Chen Le observed the house with busy eyes, trying to catch every small detail that comes into his attention.

 _It really doesn’t have any significant difference from ours in terms of space aside from the design and how quiet it is in here._ The youngest said in his thoughts and curious as to why it is so hushed despite its scale, he asked Jeno out of a whim. “Jeno-hyung, why is your house really quiet? Where are your parents? I hadn’t seen them at all since we arrived here,” he asked while looking around, searching for some clues on where the elder’s family might be at. Ever since they arrived, all Chen Le saw was the house maids and the butlers— no one else. Everyone knew that Jeno was an only child but it was really weird that there was no one there in his household besides him and the staff.

The younger was waiting for an answer but no reply came. He looked on ahead and saw that the other three seemed to be so engulfed with whatever it is they are talking about that Chen Le’s question was overlooked. 

He pouted, knowing that no one might have heard him, or so he thought.

Jeno, on the other hand, noticed that Chen Le was dismayed which was apparent on the pout he had on his face when he looked back to spare him a glance. He then asked, “Lele, is something wrong? Did you say something?”

Still pouting, Chen Le replied, “No hyung, don’t mind me.”

“I’ll walk with you,” the latter offered as he tugged on behind, standing beside the younger as they made their way down the ridiculous amount of staircases before they reached the living room. “To make sure you’re not lonely here at the back,” and he showed his infamous eye smile to the youngest, Chen Le’s mood instantly lifts.

“Hyung, you are aware that what you just said is too cheesy right?” he asked while urging himself not to laugh at the elder’s choice of words but failed.

“I am now,” Jeno sniggered.

 

When they got situated on the living room, around a rather fancy looking coffee table, in front of the huge flat screen television, snacks were then served by the house staff in trays, which they thanked the moment it was put on the table for them to consume.

“Hey guys, what did you get for Ten-hyung?” Mark asked, who’s now sipping his tea, had his back leaned and legs crossed.

“Designer’s clothes,” the youngest muttered while reaching for some homemade cookies Jeno’s personal chef had made just for them.

“Two pairs of shoes,” the eldest simply said, adding another sugar cube to his coffee to make it taste a little bit sweeter.

“A round trip ticket to Hawaii for two in case he and Johnny-hyung want to get away,” Jeno sighed as he stirred his cup of tea, recalled how he ended up buying tickets instead of getting something more decent as a present since he really didn’t know what to give to the celebrant. He wanted to ask Mark for help but… the older wasn’t good at coming up with ideas as well. “How about you?”

“Me? 2 boxes of condoms and cash,” he said easily, a smirk breaking into his features. “I really do not know what to get for him.”

See what Jeno means?

After saying those words, he got the whole attention of the three with looks of astonishment existent on their faces. Jeno sighed, resisting the urge to face palm himself. Winwin, however, rolled his eyes at the younger. “Seriously Mark?”

“And a voucher for a free three-day stay at any of my family’s hotels anywhere around the country,” he added. “Clever, isn’t it?”

“Oh my goodness Mark, Chen Le’s here too you know,” Winwin scolded, attempting to cover the younger’s ears but it was too late, he already heard everything. Damn Mark for being inconsiderate of Chen Le’s age sometimes.

“So?” he said. “He ain’t that innocent like you think he is hyung.”

The youngest grimaced at that his name being dragged into the conversation when he clearly was just in front of the two, unbelievable.

But Mark wasn’t faze, he just shrugged his shoulders at them, waved his hand in a dismissive manner, brushing the topic away since he doesn’t want to be questioned about his idea of a gift. Little did they know that Mark actually thought long and hard about what to give to Ten before deciding that it was best to give him something he and Johnny would find useful.

And by useful he means… yeah, _useful_.

“Anyway, why can’t I contact you hyung?” Mark suddenly turned his attention to the still unimpressed Winwin, who had his arms crossed and glaring at him. “I tried calling your number for like seven times but no answer came, it just kept on ringing. I had to text Chen Le just to get to you,” he diverted the topic somewhere else.

“Hyung hasn’t told you? He lost his phone.” Chen Le answered for the older as he continued to eat, disregarding what Mark had gotten for Ten even though he knew fully what Mark was up to.

“Mark, tell me honestly. You only wanted me here because of my car right? Cause you don’t want your driver to drive you to the party since it would make you look uncool and I’m the only one who is allowed to drive among the four of us, am I correct?” the eldest asked sceptically.

Jeno giggled, for the reason that what Winwin had just said might be the real reason why Mark called for them.

“Don’t worry hyung, once I’m of legal age, I will bother neither you nor your car anymore,” the younger replied as he smiled sweetly at the eldest. “I could even give you free rides every now and then.”

“This punk,” the eldest muttered which was returned only by a grin from Mark.

“Where did you lose your phone hyung?” it was Jeno who asked this time.

“Probably when we went to the bathroom after lunch,” Winwin explained. “It’s been a week already though.”

“He couldn’t find his phone when we went back to the classroom together,” Chenle added. “I’ve tried calling it a bunch of times but no luck.”

“If it has been a week, someone might have found it.”

“Win-hyung really hopes not,” the youngest said after munching on the last bite of the cookie he had been holding. “He has a lot of secrets inside that phone.”

“Like what?” Mark asked, rather curious. He could use this to blackmail Winwin with!

“Like a lot,” the younger started, enumerating a few things in his mind. “Like a picture of K-”

The younger wasn’t able to finish his sentence for the older, who was sitting just besides him, covered the younger’s mouth with his palm, the latter’s words muffled and gibberish. “Shut up,” Winwin whispered.

Mark and Jeno could only eye the two suspiciously, brows raised.

\--

 

Jaemin and Donghyuck just arrived at the party that had already started about 20 minutes ago. Trust Lee Donghyuck to claim that it was only natural to come fashionably late at a party to stir attention.

Jaemin was supposed to come with his brother, Yuta, since the latter owned a car but Donghyuck came to his house earlier on that day, carried a couple of shopping bags with him, saying that he did some shopping for the younger’s outfit that he would be wearing.

“Don’t you think that this is too much?” Jaemin said when they were inside his room, trying on the clothes that the older had brought with him. He was staring into his reflection in the mirror with a frown ghosting his face. It was the 4th outfit he’d tried on and he was getting tired from all the changing that he has been doing.

“Are you blind? This one looks good on you,” Donghyuck said as he was eyeing the younger from head to toe, admiring his choice of clothes. “It fits you perfectly.”

“Well I personally think it’s too much,” the younger countered.

Jaemin was wearing a loose white and grey striped shirt underneath a matching light grey jacket with white sleeves and a black-colored collar, a pair of black skinny jeans and a pair of white Adidas high cut shoes. Donghyuck even had the courtesy to style his hair to the side, showing off his forehead, much to the younger’s displeasure. 

(A/N: Couldn't find a more decent pic. Sorry.)

“Yah! Na Jaemin, don’t expect me to allow you to just wear a plain t-shirt and jeans to a party where a ton of our friends will also be at.”

“But I like wearing comfy clothes,” the younger reasoned.

“None of that,” the older shot back, leaving him with no room to argue.

Jaemin pouted.

“Trust me, you look good,” the older assured as he stood beside the latter, looking at the mirror, searching for a possible flaw in what the younger was wearing but saw none. “Kind of pretty even. I’m sure he would be shocked if he saw you tonight.”

Jaemin rolled his eyes at his best friend’s statement as he heard him giggle. Ever since that day where he asked Donghyuck on who that guy Mark was always with, he hadn’t stopped teasing him about it and it’s been a week!

At first, it was just plain curiosity; he really wanted to know who that guy was. He held this certain mysterious air around him that got Jaemin interested and curious.

When Donghyuck told him that his name was Jeno, Jaemin felt sort of happy— even though he would never admit it to his best friend. He finally knew something about him, even if it was just his name.

And according to the older, Jeno was also going to the party same as they were since he too was also friends with Ten.

What a small world, Jaemin thought. If Jeno was friends with Ten, how come they’ve never meet before? Weird.

He was really enthusiastic to finally get a chance to meet the latter tonight since Mark told Donghyuck that he planned on introducing them formally later.

But Donghyuck seemed more excited than Jaemin was.

After a few arguments and curses thrown at each other, Jaemin finally surrendered and agreed to what the older wanted him to wear. Bless his soul.

 

When they finally arrived  at Ten’s house, the younger of the two kept retorting about how late they already were but the older gave him no mind, looking for a particular person in the crowd when they went inside. The house was packed with people and Jaemin had a hard time even trying to squeeze his way through. _Ten-hyung really outdid his self for this party._

When Donghyuck had finally who he was looking for after a few moments, he grabbed Jaemin by the wrist immediately and tugged him across the room, music blasting from the speakers in every corner.

“Where are we going?” asked the younger rather loudly with furrowed brows, not liking being handled like that.

“Just come along,” Donghyuck hissed at him.

When they were near to the person that Donghyuck had been searching for, Jaemin snorted when he saw the familiar figure just a few paces from where they were. _I should have known._ “Why are you looking for Mark-hyung? And why are you dragging me along with this?”

But yet again, he was ignored by the older which made Jaemin frown. What is it with Donghyuck tonight and he kept ignoring him? Jaemin wasn’t so sure.

When both boys finally reached where Mark was, Jaemin crossed both his arms on his chest after Donghyuck had loosened his hold on his wrist, being welcomed with a question.

“Where have you guys been?” Mark asked right away when they stood in front of him.

“I know we’re late, but where is he?” Donghyuck managed to ask, having difficulty being heard cause the music was just too loud for his liking.

“No clue,” the older who heard him nevertheless, shrugged. “He disappeared from my sights just now too.”

Donghyuck frowned at the elder’s reply. “Dang, and I really wanted him to meet Jaemin right away.” He was biting his thumbnail, sounding disappointed. 

“He’s just somewhere. He’ll show up later, I’m sure of that.” Mark stated, trying to reassure the younger as he gave him a small smile.

“Excuse me but who are we talking about here?” Jaemin interjected after his presence being ignored yet again, but this time, by Mark. This is ridiculous, he thought.

“Oh, Hi Jae,” the older greeted when he noticed him, sparing him a small nod.

“Hi hyung,” the younger greeted back. “So back to what you were saying…” the urged, wanting the conversation to continue.

“Jeno, of course,” answered his best friend for the older.

“He’s here?” Jaemin asked, his voice hinting both excitement and prying but was unheard of because of the loud bass the speakers emitted. He knew that Jeno was coming alright, but seeing that the mentioned male wasn’t anywhere near Mark, he had his suspicion.

“Yeah, we came together but I lost him in the crowd,” the older explained briefly.

“Oh.” Jaemin nodded, unconsciously looking around the crowd for any signs of the other male. If he was with Mark just a while ago, he hadn’t gone far, Jaemin decided.

Seeing the small action that the younger was doing, Donghyuck’s frown turned into a smirk instantly. “Don’t worry, he’ll turn up eventually.”

After hearing those words from his best friend, he snapped his attention back to him, blinking a few times, “I wasn’t worried.”

“Sure you weren’t,” the elder’s voice trailed before it drifted into the other noises surrounding them.

The younger made faces, mimicking what the older had said, it was clear as day to him that Donghyuck was teasing him.

“You look good by the way,” Mark said in a not-so soft voice to Donghyuck while he was handing them cups of soda he had gotten from the food table, eyed the younger to appreciate what he was wearing.

“Thanks,” the latter replied with a proud grin in his face, evidently happy at the compliment. “You too.”

_Really? They’d do this in front of me?_

Jaemin grimaced before he took a sip from the cup, shielding his reactions. They were flirting in front of him and Jaemin wanted so badly to run away, he felt like he wanted to puke rainbows. Why were they doing this to him? He felt like a third wheel and it wasn’t a nice feeling.

“You look nice too Jae,” Mark also commented on his tonight’s outfit when he turned to look at him. “Pretty even.”

The younger resisted the urge to roll his eyes. _Pretty?_ Was that supposed to be a compliment?

 _You don’t need to do that hyung. Just flirt to Donghyuck all you want._ He so wanted to say this out loud but decided not to, he’ll be murdered right on the spot by his best friend if he did.

“Donghyuck forced me to wear this stuff,” he came up as an answer.

“Well, you’re meeting Jeno, you _have_ to look nice.” Donghyuck explained, emphasizing his point.

The eldest hummed. “Jeno would appreciate that,” Mark smiled while nodding approvingly.

The younger groaned as he face palmed himself, but making sure that it won’t ruin his hair in the process. “Not you too hyung.” He didn’t came all this way to this party, agreed to Donghyuck’s every whim and wore uncomfortable clothes, just to be teased at all night, thankyouverymuch.

\--

 

Being alone at the veranda of Ten’s house while looking at the stars glittering above the night sky for a few minutes had been great for Jeno, he felt refreshed and calm. When they arrived at the elder’s house about two hours ago, they lost Winwin and Chen Le in the swarm of people that was there. Ten was really famous; a lot of people came— no wonder Johnny was against the idea of throwing a party for the former.

He was left with Mark. But during the time when the older went to greet Ten, Jeno had gotten missing on his own and couldn’t find his best friend.

At first, he planned on searching for him, to look for the older, but who was he kidding? With the large number of people and most were even strangers to Jeno’s eyes that were at Ten’s party, he knew he couldn’t find the older even if he tried.

So he just gave up and decided to roam around the house by himself instead. And that’s when he stumbled upon the veranda at the third floor. How he had managed to arrive at such a place, he didn’t know.

If Jeno could remember correctly, this has been the second time he’d been to the elder’s house. The first time was when Mark had forced the younger to come with him last summer for a barbecue party that Johnny and Ten hosted.

A small smile broke into his features at the memory. Moments like those have been considered rare for their group— rare for them to gather in one place at the same time. Taeil, Doyoung, Kun, Hansol, Taeyong, Mark’s brother Jaehyun, even the always-busy-with-football-practice Yuta were there that night. But now that he thinks of it, he did remember that Winwin and Chen Le weren’t with them since they went back to China for their summer vacation. Donghyuck wasn’t able to attend as well, same as Yuta’s younger step brother which Jeno haven’t met yet.

Funny, he thought. They’ve all been friends for a few years now yet he still hasn’t met the elder’s younger brother.

Dismissing the thought aside, he looked at his wrist watch, realizing that it was already a quarter to 9 o’clock, he then decided to go back to where the party was. Some might have already gone home so he thought it wouldn’t be that crowded downstairs anymore. He should look for Mark.

As he made his way back to the garden, for some odd reason, Jeno wasn’t paying attention to where he was going. He had his head hung low; looking at his shoes with every step he took, confident that he won’t bump into somebody with each stride.

_I haven’t seen him at al—_

His thought was suddenly cut off when he collided into another body that was just in front of him yet he didn’t noticed.

_Oh, my bad. I should have looked where I was going._

He heard the person let out an ‘ufff’ then a sound of something being dropped caught his ears.

He gazed beneath, to a spot close to his shoes; a phone had somehow landed on the grass in front of him. Jeno bended slightly to pick it up only to find another hand reach for it as well.

He looked up to see who the owner of the hand was and was met by a pair of beautiful brown orbs staring back at him. Jeno’s breathe was caught in his throat as their eyes made contact. He knew who this person was. This was the guy he saw a few weeks ago! The guy with the kitten.

The male in question also had widened his eyes at the sight of Jeno. Perhaps he knows me? Jeno thought, a wave of hope blossomed in the pit of his stomach.

Jeno, however, couldn’t help but stare at him in awe.

He was dressed nicely and looked awfully pretty up close. They were standing at a safe distance from each other yet he could make out the stunning features the guy in front of him had, he even caught a glance of what the other was wearing. That was quite odd considering that Jeno never really is the type to throw compliments here and there, even if he doesn’t say it out loud.

They both stood for a while, doing nothing other than looking at each other’s eyes.

While doing so, Jeno noticed how the other was a tad taller than he was, barely visible but gave it no mind for he focused his attention somewhere else; he focused on how beautiful this guy’s eyes were.

 _Pretty,_ he thought and smiled a little.

He decided to say something then after, for the other had broken their quite mind-blowing eye-contact, probably feeling uncomfortable under his gazes.

_Was I staring too much?_

“I’m sorry I bumped into you. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going,” Jeno said softly to the other while he handed him his phone back.

The latter looked down to his hand, observing for a few seconds before he reached for his phone, Jeno made a mental note on how the guy’s fingers gently brushed against his own.

“I’m sorry too, and thank you,” he smiled at Jeno.

“It’s oka—” but then again, before he could finish whatever he was about to say, he was immediately cut off by a rather loud shout across from where they were.

“NANA!!!!”

They both looked up, searching the premises to find where the voice had come from and to their surprise; it came from Ten, who was hurriedly running towards them with his signature smile plastered on his face.

The person in front of him looked right back into his eyes once more, muttered a soft ‘thank you once again’ before he left Jeno to meet Ten.

He just stared at this so-called _Nana’s_ back as he was now distancing himself away from Jeno.

Jeno intently watched the both of them from the spot he was still glued at. _Nana_ finally reached Ten and feeling this weird presence that someone was observing him from afar, _Nana_ was about to look his way again, but Jeno broke his gaze before it got any further, looked down onto the ground like it was the most interesting thing he has ever seen that night and walked back to where he came from.

Once more, before completely walking away from them, for he couldn’t resist the urge; he looked back, seeing that they are now heading towards where the party was being held at the moment, he felt something— something he hadn’t felt for a long time now and thought with a frown, s _o he’s not the Jaemin._

\--

 

His eyes were blank, dead even, as he made his way towards the party, spotting Mark at a corner with Donghyuck.  

Mark noticed him and gestured for him to come over to where they were and so he did.

 “Where have you been? I’ve been looking everywhere for you,” was the first thing Mark had said when the latter that approached them. Barely noticing the dull impression the younger possessed, the older frowned and asked, “Are you alright?” voice trailing with concern.

“I called my driver, I’m heading home,” he replied simply, voice low.

The tone of Jeno’s voice didn’t escape Mark’s ears even if the venue was very loud.

He wanted to ask about it, ask what was wrong with him but instead all he came up with was, “Already?”, after deciding to just let it go for now. Something was up with the younger, Mark was sure of that.

“Sorry, I’m not feeling well.” Jeno gave a small smile, trying to reassure him that he was alright after noticing the hint of worry in the elder’s eyes.

“What? No, you can’t leave! You haven’t even met Jaemin yet!” Donghyuck, who was standing beside Mark all this time, interjected after hearing that the older will be leaving the party early than expected. What will become of their plan to make those two meet now?

Jeno glanced at Donghyuck for a second then looked away right after, avoiding his questioning eyes.

_It doesn’t matter, he’s not Jaemin._

“I’m sorry Donghyuck, maybe some other time?” he smiled apologetically to the younger which only made Donghyuck rather unsure.

“Promise me Jeno. Next time. Okay?” he had to ask, he wanted to make sure that the latter will pull through if he promised, his mind telling him to do so.

But instead of answering, Jeno forced a smile that Donghyuck swore he had never seen the former made once in his life.

It was fake, no doubt about it.

Donghyuck turned to Mark, wanting to question the older why Jeno was like that, but the older only shook his head as a reply. _Let him be_ , Mark’s eyes read.

He slowly nodded in understanding, respecting what the older clearly wanted to say. But it doesn’t flatter his curiosity, not one bit. It made him wonder what could have happened to the older before he came to them.

 _What made Jeno that way?_ He thought as he watched the elder’s back as he walk away from them. Even if he had his back turned, he still appeared dejected and it made Donghyuck frown once more.

Seeing Jeno like that made him feel bad.

Jeno, on the other hand, thinks that this foreign feeling that he is feeling at the moment will leave him just like how his thoughts about the book had left him earlier.

However, he still had a frown on his face when he arrived home.

\--

 

Jaemin didn’t know how it happened but it did, he had lost sight of Donghyuck somehow. He was with his best friend and Mark about an hour ago and then suddenly, they were gone.

He wasn’t sure if he really lost them or if they were just hiding from him intentionally.

Jaemin was in the garden of Ten’s house, he had been pacing back and forth the empty space just across the huge fountain for the nth time that night, trying to look for the older. He was holding his mobile phone against his ear, calling his good-for-nothing best friend.

But no one answered; it just kept ringing until an automated voice spoke, directing him to voicemail. This has been his 5th attempt at calling him but just like the first four attempts it was also in vain.

“Darn you Lee Donghyuck, answer the phone!” He didn’t care if his best friend was having the time of his life with his crush or whatever, how dare he leave him alone like that?

But Jaemin didn’t give up; he tried yet again, dialling the elder’s number one last time.

_If he doesn’t answer this, I swear I’ll spill every embarrassing secret he has to Mark-hyung._

And what luck, as the call was about to pull through, a body had bumped into his, causing him to jerk and accidentally dropping his phone on the process.

He hissed under his breathe, but low enough so no one would hear.

He searched for his phone, seeing that it was on ground, he sighed in relief, thankful that the screen hadn’t cracked or anything due to the impact it had to the ground. It was a good thing that the place they were at was surrounded by newly trimmed Bermuda grass.

And then, he saw a hand reach for his phone, out of reflex, he reached for it as well, soft fingers brushed against his before he took his hand back and stared at the person in front of him. He felt shivers run down his spine at the small contact.

When Jaemin was gaping at him face to face, now standing in front of Jeno, the guy he really wanted to meet, being just shocked was an understatement.

He wasn’t sure how he looked at the moment which made him want to get away from the situation, but his eyes, drowning themselves into Jeno’s, who was also staring back at him, prevented him from doing so.

Jaemin doesn’t know why but he just can’t stop himself from sinking deeper into those half-moon shaped eyes and he didn’t really care if this would drag on forever or not.

In many ways than one, he wanted to question himself about numerous things; First, why wasn’t this uncomfortable to him? Second, why was Jeno’s eyes so captivating? And why was he feeling nervous above all things all of a sudden?

Jaemin noticed how a small smile had crept into Jeno’s face, making his breathe hitch at the sight. This made him suddenly self-conscious about himself that even if he didn’t want to, he broke their shared eye-contact.

After doing so and being reeled back into reality, he heard Jeno speak for the very first time.

“I’m sorry I bumped into you. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going,” the older said while he handed him his phone back. Jaemin was secretly surprised at how soft spoken this guy in front of him was.

He managed to utter a timid reply to the other, the faint feeling on his small yet gentle touch lingering in his fingertips.

As he continued staring at the older, he had come up with a decision. He decided right then, at that very moment, after Jeno will say whatever it is he had to say, he will introduce himself to him. He was ready, ready to properly make known to the older that his name is Na Jaemin.

He listened carefully to the other as he spoke, preparing himself for his quite clever introduction he had just made up in his mind.

 

 “NANA!” a sudden shout from a distance called for him.

He didn’t need to look to know who it was, he internally sighed as he thought, _talk about bad timing, Ten-hyung._

He debated with himself whether he should go and meet Ten or to stay and talk to Jeno some more. As much as would have liked to stay, it was Ten’s birthday, and it would be rude if he didn’t greet the older on his special day. What kind of dongsaeng would he be if he did that? So, with a tinge of guilt and slight regret, he excused himself and mouthed a soft thank you to Jeno one more time before he went to where Ten was.

When he reached Ten, they exchanged hugs like they usually do and talked about how his party was going so far but not before the older threw him some couple compliments on how he looked.

“Wasn’t that Jeno?” Ten mentioned in the middle of their conversation after noticing the said male just across where they were and apparently was the one who Jaemin was talking to before he called for him.

Jaemin turned to look back at Jeno but the latter had his gaze somewhere else.

“Yeah, it was.”

“Oh well, come on back to the party. Jeno will come along if he wants to.” Ten knows how the teenager likes solitude rather than being with numerous strangers in a crowded party.

Jaemin was itching to reject the offer, to return to Jeno and finish what he started. But the look that the older gave him made him think otherwise.

 _I’ll get another chance_ , he thought.

Before finally leaving the garden to head on back inside the house where the party was, Jaemin looked back once again to Jeno’s direction, but did it in a way that went unnoticeable by anyone, by the latter and by Ten.

However, it seems like he wasn’t the only one wanting to share that stomach fluttering eye-contact again. Just when he turned his head, Jeno already had his eyes on him. But what he saw made his face and mood drop almost immediately.

It was quick and didn’t last long but he caught it, the look the latter gave him just before he and Ten disappeared into the sea of people that were inside the house.

Jeno looked disappointed while looking at him.

He frowned at the thought.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> School has really been stressful but here's an update. We apologize for some overlooked errors. This chapter is lengthy (11.7K words wtf) and we were too tired (and too lazy) to read it again. Lol.

The day that they were having was one of those very unusual days; their teacher had fallen sick and had taken the week off to recover, leaving the special class with no homeroom teacher, and that could only mean one thing; they were free from their first to second period classes. The heavens seem to have heard the students' prayers of the said class for exam week was coming sooner than they could imagine and they were getting busier by the day and all they wanted was to have a day off or two. They were thankful for every free period that they could get to prevent further deterioration of their brain cells from all the never ending examinations they were pressured on to pass.

To keep themselves preoccupied before their next class, four boys had gathered themselves at the back most part of the room, talking amongst each other. Their conversation ranged from the latest happenings of the series they were watching to the latest music released by their favorite artist. Everything seemed normal.

Okay... so maybe not.

Lee Jeno was his usual self.

This is what everybody will say upon interacting with him, but Mark says he's not, he knew better than to fall for the other's facade. Jeno had his typical smile plastered on his face but if one would look really closely, there was something off; something in the younger's eyes that the older had detected yet could not pinpoint what it is exactly.

This had been bothering Mark for the past three days since the party. The older can still vividly remember that dead look Jeno had on before he left the gathering. This had made Mark want to question the younger about it, to ask him what was bugging him to make him act like that, but for some paramount reason, he just couldn't find the right timing to do so. Mark tried, okay, he did. But some things weren't just working out for him. Jeno has been acting weird and Mark can't live with himself if he allowed his best friend to stay like that.

"Sup Mark? Are you alright? You seem pretty distracted."

His train of thought was interrupted when Winwin had attempted to break him out from his own world and reeled him back into reality.

Mark blinked twice, turning his attention to the older that was to his right. "Uh, sorry. I was just spacing out," he explained shortly.

Winwin looked like he was about to add something, probably to question him more on his unfamiliar behaviour but was beaten to it when they both heard Chen Le say something directed to Mark's best friend.

"Hey Jeno-hyung, I forgot to ask this, but who was it that you were talking on Ten-hyung's house's hallway at the party?" the younger asked with interest.

The question itself did not only perked up Mark's attention and although the latter found the sudden question to be quite rude, he cannot help but be thankful for what the youngest had brought up for it distracted Winwin's attention somewhere else— he doesn't know how to answer the elder's previous query. But on the other hand, it also made him curious on how Jeno would react to the interrogation; it might help Mark solve the mystery beyond that barely unnoticeable, lifeless expression hidden in Jeno's eyes.

The latter hadn't anticipated the sudden shift of interest that the other three males in front of him showed; it made him a little conscious before he managed an answer to fill their curiosity. "I, uh, didn't get his name but, uh we just bumped into each other that's why maybe we seemed like we were talking?" he stuttered with his words.

Mark almost didn't sense it— almost, but he did. Jeno can lie to anyone whoever he wanted— just never Mark. The older immediately noticed those small yet timid movements that Jeno does only when he's agitated; tugging on his left ear, putting both of his hands inside the pockets of his slacks and even the way his lips would slightly tremble for a fraction of a second. Mark was familiar with those gestures— they weren't best friends for nothing after all, and he knew right then and there that Jeno was lying; that the younger is guarding his self from something.

But from what? Mark was curious.

The older then took notice of the sudden change in the younger's demeanour even though he was smiling. Mark was drawing various deductions in his mind on what could have happened. But it would seem like that his best friend would rather not talk about with anybody else, even him, unless he's feeling like it. And maybe, just maybe, it is a part of, or worse, even the whole reason why he appeared to be in a sour mood before leaving the party that night.

Still having his mind diverted to somewhere else, his peripheral vision had somehow caught sight of Chen Le; he noticed the younger mumbling something like _staring intensely_ while he had his brows furrowed. Mark wasn't entirely sure if he read his lips right because the youngest of the four seemed to be in a state of daze, and well, Mark wasn't a master at lip reading.

That night of Ten's birthday, Chen Le and Winwin had gotten themselves separated from both Mark and Jeno. He didn't know how it happened but yeah, they got separated. There were a ton of people there, the whole place was packed and for the same reason, the youngest had gone astray again and lost sight of Winwin as well. Chen Le tried looking for his friends, he tried, but it was hopeless. He was small and there were just a lot of people that he had a difficult time. He came upon the garden at the back most part of Ten's house when he was in the midst of looking for the older Chinese male— thinking that he would be the easiest to find because of his mop of blonde hair, but he didn't saw him there; Chen Le saw someone else.

"Hyung, by the way," Jeno interrupted. "I saw you that night at the party together with Kun-hyung. I was at the veranda on the third floor and accidently saw you talking below. You and hyung seemed lovey-dovey with each other but don't worry, I looked away right after I saw him lean in for a kiss," the latter said in a teasing manner, even wiggling his eyebrows at the oldest which made Winwin blush furiously in return after recalling the memory.

Without paying attention to the possibility that Winwin had managed to have a much more decent love life compared to him, Mark frowned deeply.

 _You're out of character Jeno. You clearly are guarding yourself, trying to get the attention away from you,_ the older thought while observing his best friend with a frown still intact on his features, for he knows that even though he was Jeno's best friend, the latter won't easily tell him everything and that was bugging him. C'mon, they've been friends for years yet how come it feels like Jeno doesn't trust him enough to tell him what was bothering him instead of keeping it all to his self and make the older worry and make a fuss about it?

But don't get Jeno wrong, he wants to tell Mark, he really does. But somehow, he can't think of the right words to say to the older if he did. Telling him that he was still affected by the fact that that Nana guy wasn't _the Jaemin_ that he expected seemed like a pretty lousy reason. He didn't want his best friend to think indifferently of him.

And why was he affected anyway?

 _I just expected that it would be him, nothing more_ , Jeno decided.

"Are you two dating or something?" Jeno continued joshing the older, which would have been joined by the other two immediately– for this spectacular view of their Winwin-hyung blushing was a rare sight– but they didn't since they were too drowned in their own thoughts, making the eldest glad for whatever it is that was keeping the two at bay for not teaming up on him. Even though he had seen this coming, he really can't take all the teasing that was yet to come if they ganged up on him.

Chen Le, on the other hand, who is sure enough that he won't be able to get a proper answer if he asked either Jeno or Winwin, since he was too busy being embarrassed over the fact that they found out that he has now a boyfriend, turned to Mark who seemed lost in his thoughts like he was.

At first, he didn't want to disturb the older— he seemed preoccupied, and the youngest was pretty certain that he'll probably receive a glare of some sort from the older but he needs answers right away. Being glared be damned.

"Uh, hyung, I'm sorry for bothering but I have a question that I've been meaning to ask," after saying these words, he hoped for the best; for the older not to glower at him or be mad.

Chen Le was kind of relieved when Mark turned to him with his usual poker face but with no evidence of a scowl on his features attached, and assumed that it was a clear sign for him to go on and elaborate.

"Would it be possible to stare deeply at a person whom you know nothing of, even his name? For two people who are complete strangers to lock intense gazes?" he asked; voice full of interest and pure curiosity.

Chen Le would be lying if he said that what he saw that night at Ten's garden didn't confuse him even at the slightest. He knew both of them, both were his friends yet why do they seem like they're strangers to one another?

Oh right, maybe because they were.

Chen Le had almost forgotten; Jeno and Jaemin had never met each other before. They belong to the same group of friends, true, and yes, it was weird, but they really haven't met yet. Knowing Jeno, the latter doesn't socialize much and when their older hyungs would arrange a small party or gathering for their group, he usually wouldn't attend and if he did, Jaemin would be the one absent. What a huge coincidence, right?

Mark was quiet for a moment, gathering his words before he retorted, "that depends though. Maybe they were flirting or something or they're awestruck with each other which don't happen usually nowadays, but yeah that's only what I can think of in those cases for strangers."

But still, it doesn't answer Chen Le's previous question; if both Jaemin and Jeno didn't knew each other, why would they look like each other like the way that they did? Their gazes were both intense and gentle at the same time and it was giving the younger mixed signals.

What is it with those two? Chen Le was puzzled.

The younger nodded profusely as if he was enlightened by the elder's reply even though he wasn't completely satisfied and then smiled brightly to the older and said thanks as a sign of gratitude. At least he wasn't that confused anymore.

"But why are you asking anyway?" Mark probed, wanting to make sure if what his intuition was telling him was true; that what Chenle had just asked was something related to a teenager named Lee Jeno.

"About that hyung, it's because—" the bell then rang, signalling the beginning of their third period. It made Mark cuss lowly– not being able to hear fully what the younger was supposed to tell him– when their teacher walked in through the door and the boys scattered to get back to their seats.

\--

Both boys at the other side of the high school department building had just finished eating their lunch and were back to their classroom, seated on their respective chairs, minding their own business, and honestly, Donghyuck is not having a pleasant time at all. A person named Na Jaemin and the subject entitled MATH, namely Trigonometry, being the culprit of it all.

"Tell me. Tell me why would he look at me like that?" Jaemin fumed before he took a rather large bite of the chocolate bar he had in his hand, teeth gritting as he chewed forcefully.

"Jaemin, eat," Donghyuck told him, trying to block out his best friend's annoying voice as he was in the core of solving his math homework that he had forgot to bring home last week which will be passed in today's class. Why of all things that he had forgotten about, it had to be about Math?! And to think that this was his weakest subject!

"I mean, what did I do wrong to deserve that?" his best friend continued, indifferent of what the older was doing since he was already done with his homework and couldn't care less of the elder's struggles. Well, it was his fault for not doing it in the first place, Jaemin decided.

"Just eat quietly please," the older pleaded because he was now starting to get vexed at both the guy seating besides him– who had been doing nothing except rant instead of letting him copy from his own answers– and the notebook that was front of him. Why did Math have to be so hard? (A/N: Fun fact. I'm a Math Major and Axidreiin's a Stat Major so we know what we are talking about here. XD)

"I can't just ignore Ten-hyung because it was his birthday, okay?" but his request seemed to have been ignored by the younger as he continue rumbling about who knows what. "It was not my fault!"

Donghyuck groaned, almost at the peak of his patience.

"I knew that we were doing just fine before that, before I went to meet Ten-hyung. I was even ready to tell him who I was! But then why did he have to look at me like that?"

The older had now covered his ears, to shield himself from the ruckus the younger was making, and to maintain his focus on their assignment since he was almost at the end of it. Once he was done, he could finally relax and shut the hell up of Jaemin.

"I still can't figure him out! I hate it! I hate him! And I hate the fact that I don't know why he gave me that look!"

Okay... Enough was enough.

"Na Jaemin, shut up, okay?! Can't you shut up for a second here?!" he exploded, slamming his hands on the table, causing the younger to jolt on his seat. "Three days! Three days Jaemin! You've been at it for three days already! You've been moping and ranting nonstop and I still have no idea what had happened to you to be like this and who is the person behind it all, so do me a favour by telling me everything about it so that I can understand what you're feeling from your stand point cause I really don't!" Donghyuck cried in one breath as the glared at the younger, unable to contain the obstructive feeling brought about by everything he was handling at the moment. Math was already tough enough, why was Jaemin adding to his misery?

The latter just ogled at him for not less than a minute before dropping his head, feeling guilty for getting Donghyuck furious like that, tightening his grip on the chocolate bar, and spoke, "I'd rather not talk about it." in a quiet voice, then stood up from his seat and transferred to another one at a corner and sulked by his self.

Glaring heatedly at his best friend is the only thing he can do because his knuckles might come in contact with the other's face if he comes any closer. He badly wants to knock some sense into that brain of Na Jaemin.

Donghyuck heaved a loud sigh after staring into the defeated stance that Jaemin had, his back turned to him, avoiding any possible eye contact. The latter's shoulders were hunched and his head was still hung low, he looked so vulnerable and fragile in that sort of position that Donghyuck thinks the younger might break down any moment if comes near him. And if the older wasn't so pissed right now, he would be the protective best friend that he usually is to the younger and try to ask him what was wrong. He knows getting mad at the younger was pretty idiotic of him but he couldn't control it. It was getting on his nerves. And Jaemin won't tell him anything. What could he do if didn't know a thing at what the younger was going through?

Well, he could always ask. Jaemin would tell him anything if he pressures him to. But he knows it was the worst time to do something like that, especially when the younger was in that current state of his.

He needed space, Donghyuck decided.

And he doesn't know why exactly, but he gets this idea that Jaemin is probably reflecting. And strangely enough, the rather cold aura that he had was somewhat alike to the air that Jeno had around him when he went to bid goodbye to both him and Mark before he left the party. The thought made Donghyuck ran an upset palm on his face, clearly telling everyone who was looking at him that he was distraught about something.

Sighing once again, he fished out his phone inside his pocket and texted someone that he thinks might be able to listen to him and understand, resting both his arms on the desk as he typed a short message and pressed send.

_< < We need to talk. Rooftop now before lunch break ends._

After sending the text message, he hadn't said a word to his best friend before he shot to his feet and left the room.

\--

Okay, so maybe he had let his hopes soar up too high this time.

After receiving that text message from Donghyuck, Mark made a quick run towards the rooftop– leaving his friends behind the room without saying anything as to where he was going– only to find out that the said boy merely called him out just to have someone to vent out his frustrations on about his best friend who had been acting completely out of his reach and is way beyond understanding.

Even though Mark came to where they had agreed to meet, the every instant the younger had asked for his presence– with an anticipation of a completely different reason in mind, he was still happy that the younger chose him out of so many people he could discuss it with aside from the older, nonetheless. The idea made him smile, thinking that he was the first above anybody else that came to Donghyuck's mind.

It had to mean something, right?

"He's leaving me completely at the dark and it's not pleasant in any way! I just can't believe him! Ranting about something then when asked what he is talking about, he'll sulk!" he huffed. They were seated beside each other on the rooftop's floor, back leaned against the cold concrete wall.

"He's been like this for three days straight and I think it's no longer healthy for him and for me also! I know he's stressed but why does he drag me into it? Dang! It stresses me out every single day whenever I try to decipher what ancient language he's talking about! That stupid Jaemin!" the younger spoke so fast that it almost sounded gibberish to Mark's ears but the older still decided to hear the other out.

Donghyuck was obviously upset as he continued on raving to the older about what Jaemin had put him through. Mark had noticed that people are less attractive when they are mad since their facial expressions becomes all rough and tends to stiffen but somehow, looking at a frustrated Lee Donghyuck made Mark chuckle softly.

He found the younger to be quite adorable.

"Hey Mark!"

Before he knew it, he was lost in his own thoughts again, and Donghyuck was waving a hand in front of his face, trying to get his attention.

The older looked at him, smiling.

"Why are you smiling? Are you happy that this is all happening to me right now?" the younger asked, brows furrowed while making exaggerated hand gestures to explain how burdened he felt.

"Oh no, it's nothing like that—" the older was about to explain futher but Donghyuck had cut him off even before he could finish.

"Then what? My gosh, Mark! I called you out here to listen to me but yet you are getting all spaced out!" he sounded disappointed.

Okay, he was really getting stressed about it and the older doesn't want him to be.

"It's not that, seriously," the older answered, trying to reassuring him that he was still on the younger's side regardless of anything else. "It's just that, I'm happy that I was the one you wanted to talk to about this out of so many people you know of," he added, then gave Donghyuck what seemed like a sweet and comforting smile before rubbing the back of his neck, embarrassed of what he just said. But he was never gonna take it back, especially when he saw Donghyuck had widen his eyes.

Seeing the younger's reaction, a pink blush spread across his face, even reaching the tips of his ears, Mark was pleased.

"And coincidentally, I'm having the same issues with Jeno right now." The smile Mark previously had slowly turned into a frown at the thought of his best friend.

"Jeno too? Why what happened?" the younger asked, still feeling giddy about the elder's words from earlier but chose to not show too much emotion for he would be found out.

"How should I put it? Remember he went home early on Ten-hyung birthday party right?"

The younger cleared his throat first before answering, "Yeah. What about it?"

"You see—"

"I don't," Donghyuck then smirked and Mark just rolled his eyes at the former's idea of a joke.

Sometimes, Donghyuck was bad at finding the proper timing to pull up a joke or two but Mark doesn't mind. Donghyuck was Donghyuck, nobody could stop him.

"The day after that, Jeno gave the impression that he was fine, like what had happened the night before, whatever it was, didn't occur at all," he explained. "It seemed like he doesn't want to recall what happened then."

Donghyuck tilted his head to the side, trying to comprehend what Mark had just said. "Wait. That sort of thing can happen though. Maybe he's just really not feeling good that night that's why he left?"

"That can't be the reason, Donghyuck," the older countered. "As introverted as he is, Jeno won't just leave a party because he feels sick. And if he did, he would most likely just go to some quiet place where he can rest or where no one he doesn't know of can bother him. I really suspect that something did happen at the party without my knowledge or with any of us knowing for that matter. It has been bugging me since he knows he could tell me anything yet he wasn't told me anything."

Even though it was vibrant as the afternoon sky above them that the older was dismayed, the younger couldn't help but be astounded at how calmly the older let the words out from his mouth even though he had a frown on his face.

"Well, uh, maybe it's not that big of a deal?" he proposed.

Donghyuck may not know much about Jeno but it was a possibility that Mark was just overreacting, same goes for him about Jaemin.

Mark shook his head, disagreeing with the younger. "He's avoiding the attention, passing it to another person whenever the topic of whatever happened in the party is brought up. Meaning, he's guarding himself from everybody else. And it's obvious to me that he doesn't want to talk about it or give it even the slightest thought. You're kind of lucky with Jaemin, at least he's a little vocal with you about not wanting to talk about it. Jeno is just silent and it's killing me not being able to help him out."

Donghyuck was silent the entire duration that Mark was pouring his heart out on him. It would seem like Mark had a lot of worries when it comes to his best friend than more than meets the eye yet he could still managed to form a small smile when he looked over to Donghyuck. He suddenly felt bad. The younger just wish he could do something to ease the discomfort that he was going through, to assure him what everything was doing to be fine.

"Uh, sorry?" He didn't know what to say.

It might have been rude if it were other people that the younger is talking to but Mark understood Donghyuck meant it nonetheless— even if it was just a single word, which made him smile once more.

He shook his head. "Don't be sorry Donghyuck. I'm afraid that this might get out of hand, out Jeno's control and will cause bigger problems to him one day," he sighed, thinking about the possibilities and the short-comings the younger was bound to face if this issue wasn't solved as early as possible. "I just hope that he'll be able to sort it out himself sooner. I'll always be behind him whenever he needs me."

Both were silent for a while, Donghyuck was quietly observing him for a few fleeting seconds, admiring the conviction and love the elder had for his best friend.

"Jeno's so lucky to have you Mark," those words left the younger's lips without much remorse as he stared at the older in awe. Mark was so mature, he knew how to handle the situation about Jeno well unlike he was. Sometimes he questions why Mark had chosen him out of other people who were more compatible with him.

A small smile tugged on Mark's face at the younger's assertion. "So are you," he responded, voice visible with affection as he saw the other flush.

Donghyuck hadn't muttered a reply after that, still dumbstruck at Mark's rather bold statement. Mark really knows how to make a person swoon for him. The younger had his head hung low, both arms wrapped around his knees but his reddened face was still visible for Mark to see nonetheless.

Other people tend to forget that despite Donghyuck's rather blunt and straight forward personality, he was still human, capable of getting embarrassed at various occasions. Mark had known the younger for a few years now and to be honest, this was the first time that Donghyuck hadn't come up with a response, an insult or even just a lame joke. It was quite unusual yet it warms Mark's heart to know that he could leave the usually noisy younger male speechless with his advances.

 _This goes to show that I have a bigger chance at him than I first thought_ , Mark believed.

The older stood up first and dusted his pants off. "Come on, lunch breaks almost over." He held his left hand out, wanting to help the younger get up to his feet so they both could head on back to their respective classrooms.

Without second thought, the younger accepted the hand and was pulled up by the older. Both boys smiled at each other warmly before they went out the door and made their way together towards their classrooms side by side.

Before parting ways as their classrooms were on different directions; he stopped his tracks, an idea suddenly made its way to Mark's mind.

It was brilliant.

Why wasn't he thought of this before?

The younger noticed that the older had stopped walking and halted as well, turned back to face him and asked, "What's wrong?"

"Donghyuck, how about we let those two finally meet today after class?"

"What do you mean?" asked the latter, somewhat confused, not getting the full grasp of what the older is implementing.

"Let Jeno and Jaemin meet today after class. You know, to let the both of them get distracted for a while from whatever is keeping them this way," explained the older further, a knowing grin breaking into his features.

The younger's mouth slowly widened as he gradually understood the elder's plan. "You're right! Wow Mark! You're really a genius!" praised Donghyuck, sounding excited at the spontaneous plan.

"Not really," he shrugged then snorted, sparing the younger another one of his infamous smirks.

"Aish, this person," Donghyuck grimaced at the disgusting— yet _gorgeous_ smirk the older gave him. He shook his head to chase the thought away; he turned back to the older. "Anyway, how are we going to make them meet though?" asked Donghyuck.

"The four of us will walk home altogether," Mark replied.

And they began devising a simple yet fool-proof plan.

\--

Upon entering the classroom with a few minutes to spare before the bell rings, Donghyuck came to a sulking Jaemin in front of his desk, slamming both of his hands together on the wooden table, startling the poor Jaemin.

"Why'd you do that for?!" he nagged at his best friend as he jolted at the harsh sound of flesh coming in contact with wood.

"We're going home together with Mark and Jeno today," the older announced, grinning at the latter.

It took a few seconds before the younger had fully understood what the older was implying with his assertion.

With widened eyes; he looked shocked about the news, internally panicking. He didn't know how to react to what the older had just said.

What he knows for certainty at the moment is that he was still afraid to see Jeno after what had happened at the party. He still wasn't ready for this!

Donghyuck was waiting for his response though; knowing that Jaemin had been pretty psyched about wanting to meet Jeno a few days ago. It would probably cheer him up.

Jaemin looked up at Donghyuck, thinking that perhaps the older was just making it up; playing with him but he appeared serious and Jaemin knew that he was doomed.

He saw how his best friend wiggled both of his eye brows at him making him want to consider the offer— he was almost tempted to accept and just go with it, and he was afraid to disappoint the former, but no, he's not yet ready to face Lee Jeno again. He can't push himself to do it no matter how much he wanted to talk to him one more time, to see him smile again, and to just stare at him for no reason whatsoever.

"I don't want to," he was surprised at how stubborn his voice came out when he said those words but gave it no thought.

Not expecting the sudden decline, with brows knitted together, Donghyuck frowned, glaring at the younger; examining every inch of his face, trying to find traces of a possible reason behind this sudden change of behavior about meeting Jeno.

"Why so? You were so enthusiastic last time about seeing him," the older asked carefully in an eerie way.

"I just don't like to."

"You'll come along whether you like it or not," the older said sternly, finality rich in his voice.

"You can't make me," he challenged.

And they both heard the bell rang, signalling that lunch break was over.

The whole afternoon class had been somehow a slow torture for Na Jaemin; not only was his best friend throwing daggers at him occasionally if he turned to him in the middle of class but also that that memory of Jeno's disappointed look kept replaying in the back of his mind for the nth time. No matter how hard he tries, why can't he forget about that already?

This is frustrating, Jaemin thought.

The latter doesn't know why he was so afraid about meeting the older; maybe it was because he was afraid that Jeno might look at him like that again and dreaded the possibility of it ever happening twice.

His fear doubled, tripled even, upon the sudden mention of Lee Jeno's name earlier and about the thought of having to have to walk with him home when he clearly didn't want to see him for a while. Jaemin blames Donghyuck for all of this. Why the older suddenly came up with the idea of them walking home together was beyond him. What was he playing at?

But Jaemin knew he had no right to be mad at Donghyuck for this. He hadn't told his best friend about what happened with Jeno so he can't really expect him to understand his situation.

 _I can't tell him, I really can't_ , Jaemin chanted repeatedly in his mind.

Jeno and Donghyuck were friends, and Jeno was Mark's best friend, he doesn't want his best friend's view on the older to change just because of that one look Jaemin was fusing about.

 _It could have meant nothing. It could have been just a lazy stare_ ; Jaemin kept telling himself to keep the air positive around him.

But who was he kidding? Jaemin wasn't blind. Even though he couldn't pin point what emotion the older was wearing when he was looking at him but he was sure it wasn't a pleased one.

How could he face Jeno like this?

The promise of meeting Jeno after school kept Jaemin on edge all throughout the duration of his afternoon classes, he was feeling anxious every single time he'd look up to the wall clock, only to see that it was almost about to end. He was being paranoid about this and it wasn't cool.

He can't believe he is thinking of things like this in the middle of class, he silently wishes for class not to end at all, to let their lesson go on forever if it means not meeting the older which was pretty odd since Jaemin never really did like class— except for P.E.

He was having a small countdown inside his head; it was as if the world was coming to an end and that if once the bell rings, he'll fall dead and he didn't want to ignore the time.

As every minute passes by and as the clock goes down, the more nervous he gets. He tries to suppress the feeling but the beating of his heart is erratically fast, allowing him to know just how exactly fretful he really is.

The older besides him sensed how tensed he was; tapping nonstop on their desk, which made him lean in a little closer to the latter and whispered, "Are you that excited that you can't even keep still?"

Jaemin turned to his left, frowning at the all too knowing look his best friend threw at him. "Who said I was excited? I am nowhere near excited at all so leave me alone and just go home with the both of them if you want to spend that much time Mark-hyung!" he whispered back harshly to the former, looking back in front so their teacher wouldn't suspect that they were talking although they were.

"Don't you know that we are doing this for you two in the first place? To give you guys a little distraction from being in this sulking state you both are in!" he whispered back, but it came out louder than he first meant it to be. He was lucky enough that their teacher suddenly went outside when a colleague called for her that she didn't hear the sudden raise in Donghyuck's tone.

"Why? What happened to Jeno?" his curiosity was fired up upon hearing that Jeno needed a distraction. Distraction from what?

"I don't know much but you should really give yourselves a break. What more? Once you get to know him, you can talk to him about a lot of things, ask him questions even if you know the answer to it already, and even ask for his number," Donghyuck enumerated, blurting out obscene things out of nowhere.

Jaemin hates the fact that the older had his way with words, he was good at convincing him yet he knew that Donghyuck was probably right— not about the number part. He does need a break, from all the nonsense he had been letting himself go through just because of the pair of cold yet undeniably beautiful eyes that stared at him in disappointment one night.

And yes. Jaemin was back to considering meeting Lee Jeno once again. He doesn't know where he got this sudden boost of courage from but he would be lying if he would say that he wasn't still afraid about what may happen if they did talk and meet formally.

But if they did talk, Jaemin could finally get the closure that he wanted; he would finally know the reason behind Jeno's actions that night. This might be his chance to know the reason why.

_Damn Donghyuck. If this doesn't go well, I'm blaming you for the rest of my life._

Then when the bell suddenly rang, echoing through the halls of the high school department, informing everyone about the end of today's classes, it was decided.

"I'm coming with you Donghyuck," he said when he turned to his best friend.

The latter smirked in return.

\--

Mark was standing in front of their university gate, back leaned against icy steel bars, waiting for his two companions, who he had promised to meet with, to arrive so they could go home, both hands stuffed in his pockets. With that posture and the air he had around him, honestly, the latter looks like a model in the middle of a photo shoot. Mark had always been attractive. He was multi-talented, handsome and smart. Mark was perfect, in every sense of the word. Everybody in their school knows how fully capable the male is.

No one can deny that the older was oozing with charisma and appeal, making people gawk at him as they pass by. The thing about Mark is that, he doesn't notice the stares they send his way, for maybe he was so used to it and deemed it as something of normal occurrence already. He isn't at all bothered by all the attention he was getting.

 _Why must this guy look like he's modelling while standing there idly?_ Jaemin thought as he clearly made out the elder's form even though they were still at quite a distance. He turned to look at his best friend who was walking beside him who was unusually wearing his poker face.

 _Oh, he's jealous._ The moment was brief but he knew for a fact that he indeed saw Donghyuck bit onto his lower lip, a certain fire sparked in his eyes as he saw a few people spare Mark weird looks as they passed by him. This made the younger smirk at the rather irritated face his best friend had on as they made their way towards the older. _He wants to keep Mark for his eyes only._

"Hey, stop looking at those innocent people like you'd kill them if they stare at him any longer," the younger said in a low voice. "Do you really wanna hide Mark-hyung from everybody's eyes like that?" he asked, teasing Donghyuck.

"Huh?! What are you saying?!" his response only made the latter smile wider, pleased at the irked reaction he got from the older.

"Oh c'mon Donghyuck. You're jealous. You can't deny that."

"What are you saying? Me? Jealous?! As if!"

"You're glaring at almost everyone that's looking at him," the younger pointed out.

"That doesn't mean I'm jealous. I just don't want unnecessary prying eyes on him," he reasoned. Jaemin rolled his eyes as soon as he heard the elder's reply.

_He's so in the in denial stage!_

"You're still jealous," he pressed and then his way quickly to Mark who seems to be waiting for them, leaving the older behind.

 _Where's Jeno though?_ He noticed that Mark was alone _._

When he was close to where the older was, the latter turned to him, sensing his presence.

Mark slightly waved his hand at the younger as a greeting then he paused to look around. "Uh, where's Donghyuck?" he asked.

"Well, hello to you, too, hyung," Jaemin answered back with a snicker, brows raised questioningly at the older male for looking for Donghyuck above anything else.

Mark only replied with an awkward laugh that turned into a shy smile while he rubbed his nape. Jaemin was about to tease the older more but Donghyuck, who was following closely behind him, had finally arrived.

"What did I miss?" he asked.

"Nothing out of the ordinary," Jaemin shrugged.

Mark gave Donghyuck a small smile when their eyes locked which the latter immediately reciprocated, his whole demeanour kaleidoscopic entirely. And of course, Jaemin hadn't escaped the spectacle happening before him. If was like hearts where floating above the two and Jaemin wanted to gag.

_Seriously, how cringe-worthy can this two get?_

"By the way," Jaemin started, interrupting the two from their moment cause if what Donghyuck said earlier still holds, that they were doing this for him and Jeno then those two should stop flirting so discretely like that. "Where's?.." he mumbled but was left unfinished as he looked around, searching for the presence of a certain male but found none in the area to his dismay.

Where was Jeno?

"Oh, about that," Mark muttered, scratching his hair in an awkward manner, eyes glued to his shoes as if it was the most interesting thing he was seen that afternoon, avoiding eye contact. The tone of his voice suggested that something had happened.

What now?

"What about it Mark?" Donghyuck suddenly interjected, had his brows raised, waiting for the older to just drop the bomb and tell him he messed up on something.

"Uhm, I didn't know where he went," the oldest said quietly.

"What do you mean?" the younger asked. "Who? Jeno?"

"Well..." he started off, not knowing where to begin explaining. "Jeno has this habit of disappearing every once in a while, right before we'd both go home. At times like that, he usually likes to be left alone. I would leave him be and head on home first. One time, I waited for him for four hours before he came back. Good thing that there are still night classes cause if not, we would have been locked in for sure."

"What are you even implying?" it was Jaemin's turn to ask. He doesn't know where Mark was going with this.

The eldest of the three heaved a somewhat tired sigh before he blatantly said, "Today is one of those days. He had gone missing."

Jaemin's jaws literally dropped at the statement. What?!

"Wait, so did he just ditch us?" Donghyuck asked, outraged, getting slightly irritated at the thought. How could Jeno do this do them when he knew perfectly that they plan on letting the two today?

"No, that's not really the case," Mark exclaimed with a hint of panic in his voice as he sensed that Donghyuck was in a foul mood once again.

But the younger frowned deeply. "Then wh—"

"Hey now Donghyuck, let's not go into conclusions please," Jaemin intervened, cutting the older off before he would say anything he would regret later, holding into his best friend's arm, trying to calm him down. Jaemin was aware that Donghyuck hated being stood up more than anything after all.

A much unexpected thing happened afterwards.

Mark suddenly bowed regretfully in front of them, a perfect 90 degree angle.

"I'm sorry. It's my entire fault. I wasn't able to tell him earlier that we were going to meet you guys. I planned on telling him after class but he was gone before I even noticed. I never thought that out of all the days he would go missing, it had to be today," the elder explained, head still bowed down as he apologized sincerely.

"Wah! Hyung! You don't need to bow! It's okay, really! We're not mad!" the younger was freaking out seeing the older being like that, he was waving his arms into the air.

No matter what Jaemin said, Mark didn't move an inch, hadn't attempted to stand straight back up. The sight in front of him only made Donghyuck sigh, he reached for the older, shrugging Jaemin's hold off him and grasping into Mark's arms to get him to look at him.

"Stop that Mark. I was insensitive earlier, I'm sorry for acting up like that. I know ditching is not something Jeno would really do." Donghyuck's face softened as he said that, a hand loosely tugging on one sleeve of Mark's school jacket, gave the older an understanding smile. Jaemin made no comments after that. Donghyuck got this.

The older male locked gazes with him, nodded while muttering another sorry before straightening his self before Donghyuck took his hand back.

Truth is, Mark was guilty, but not for the reason that he didn't get to tell Jeno that they were meeting Donghyuck and Jaemin together because he did, he actually did tell the younger about what he and Donghyuck had planned. He was guilty because he had lied to both Donghyuck and Jaemin. Because yeah, apparently, Lee Jeno really did ditch them.

Never in a million years did Mark imagine of this ever happening. He knew that Jeno was shy around strangers and didn't like to interact with people he knew nothing of but this was taking it to a whole other level. Mark was disappointed in his best friend.

He too was shocked at what his best friend had just done, not expecting it in any way possible at first. For all he knows, he told Jeno about letting him and Jaemin meet when he went back to their classroom after talking to Donghyuck, the latter didn't say anything which made Mark assume that he was alright with it but when the bell rang, as Mark was tidying his stuff and putting his books into his bag, he turned around only to see no sign of Jeno around.

He then received message from the said male, saying, "Sorry. I just need to be alone Mark. I hope you understand."

And of course, being the loyal best friend that he is, whatever personal reason the younger has, lead him to lie to both Donghyuck and Jaemin's faces that were unknowing. Mark hated lying but if it keeps his best friend happy, he'd gladly do it even if it means losing Donghyuck's trust.

I'm doing this for a greater cause, Mark thought. Jeno needed him now more than ever.

"Uhm, if you two really want him to go home together with us, he can just look for him, you know. I'm pretty sure he's just around," Jaemin suggested, blurting out of the blue as he thought deeply about what Mark had said.

It appears like Jeno was going through something as well if he really badly needed to be away from his best friend like that. Not sure of this sudden decision of his, but no matter what he had gone through because of the former, Jaemin wasn't gonna just sit there and allow the older male to hollow himself in depression. They have to find him and help him out, one way or another, whether he likes it or not.

"Yes, yes! Then it will seem like Jeno haunting!" Donghyuck said, getting excited at the idea.

"Guys, it will be difficult looking for him." Mark told them as if reminding how big the university is. Jeno had gone missing and the older knew there was no way of finding him unless the latter wanted to be found. If they did try, Mark knew that it would only be in vain. Jeno was really good at hiding and the older had absolutely no clue on where the younger would be.

"Mark, there's three of us! We'll split up," Donghyuck said.

"Yes hyung," Jaemin agreed. "We could find him if we tried."

Mark sighed in defeat which the two considered as an agreement. Both had made up their minds and there was no changing it.

They are on a mission to find Lee Jeno, no matter what it takes.

\--

Jaemin was pathetic.

It had been a few hours already since Mark, Donghyuck and himself had decided to split up in order to look for Jeno, and it was almost getting dark out, but still, there was no sign of Lee Jeno anywhere.

Thinking that all his effort was futile, Jaemin wanted to punch himself after realizing how stupid he was for suggesting something like looking for the older when he clearly had no idea where to start from since he knew nothing about the former. Even Mark, who was Jeno's best friend, didn't know where the latter was, so why did he assume that he could find him on his own? He was ridiculous for even thinking of such a thing.

He almost wanted to give up but he was certain that Jeno was just around the school and hasn't left yet. Why did he seem so sure? Gut feeling.

Jaemin continued on looking for the teen in every nook and cranny of the university by his self, hoping that he might find him sooner because he was getting tired already and it made him look stupid. Sometime, he had decided to take a break from his never ending Jeno-scavenger hunt and rest below a rather familiar tree, somewhere at the grounds of their university.

Minutes after he had seated down, he heard a soft 'meow' from a distance near to where he was. He turned his head, looking around the area to search for where the sound was coming from.

When he finally found the source, a small cat standing just in front of him, licking its paw as it stared at Jaemin with grey wide eyes, he squealed excitedly. Realizing that it was the cat on the tree he saw a few weeks ago that Donghyuck had scared away, he slowly stood up and approached the little creature, being careful not scare it away like last time.

He was in front of the kitten and as it looked like it wasn't afraid of him, he ducked his head, reached for it and carried it securely into his arms like a fragile child.

"Are you lost?" he asked the small feline. "Were you wandering all by yourself?"

The kitten gave soft mew as a reply, it made Jaemin smile.

"I'm looking for someone. I've been looking for him all afternoon yet no luck. I don't know if you've seen him though," he said, directed towards the small creature in his hold. "He's about my height, has brown hair and has the same beautiful pair of eyes as you, only dark brown," he chuckled, remembering the soft pair of eyes the older male has that was very similar to one in his arms. "You haven't seen him, have you?"

It would seem like he had gotten a loose screw, talking to an animal and all that, but Jaemin didn't know what else to do. He didn't know where Jeno was and it was starting to get dark. It was a good thing that the cat was there to keep him company even for a while.

The cat suddenly purred as a reply and buried its face into Jaemin's school jacket, the latter giggled at the adorable action, caressing the back of its ear softly.

Having this sort of contact with the tiny cat, he had suddenly forgot about what it is that he was supposed to be doing and that he was supposed to be finding Jeno, forgetting about the world as he was too indulge with how cute the feline is, not noticing the evident footsteps that was nearing him.

He really didn't noticed and only became aware that he was not alone in the large space when the cat suddenly jumped off him from his arms and went off somewhere like it did last time. Frowning at the feline's sudden departure, Jaemin followed where it was going, his sight landed on a pair of shoes in front of him, the kitten rubbing its head on the intruder's leg, purring at the contact.

When Jaemin lifted up his head to see who the person was, he sucked in a deep breathe, he came face to face with the guy he was looking for!

It took a little time for him to digest that it was Lee Jeno who's in front of him right now, looking just as shocked as he was.

He didn't know how to react, now that he's found him. How was he even supposed to act when he hadn't expected the elder's presence to pop out suddenly when he wasn't prepared?

Jaemin was dumbfounded.

He was left in utter disbelief with what happened next.

The same eyes that looked at him with disappointment that night at Ten's party– that one look that had been stressing him out of a few days– gape deeply into his, but not with the usual displeased expression on it, no, not this time. Jaemin hadn't expected to see the older staring at him, with a certain trace of gentleness, topped off by a soft smile tugging on Jeno's lips, recovering from the momentarily shock he was in a few seconds ago.

Jaemin was confused, wasn't certain with anything that was doing through his mind, but one thing was for sure, upon seeing that genuine smile directed to him, it had melted all his worries away.

"I see, she's got another visitor," mentioned the older, bending down slightly as he picked the cat up.

It was as if time had stood still when Jeno spoke, everything paused, if was like they were stuck in some parallel universe, some place with just the two of them and that was all that mattered.

Jaemin was speechless for a while, tongue tied, unable to come up with any coherent words to say as the guy he had been searching for stood before him. "Is she yours?" he managed to ask, and seriously, what kind of question was that? Idiot.

"Hardly," the older answered back, he shook his head. "I thought she was yours?"

Jaemin doesn't know where Jeno had got that idea from, yet he still answered the question anyway. "She's not mine but I tend to see her here often."

The older hummed as he stroked the kitten's head endearingly. The feline seemed comfortable in Jeno's arms that it made Jaemin smile.

"She likes you," the latter found himself saying.

At the sound of Jaemin's voice, the kitten suddenly meowed.

The older looked up at Jaemin, amazed that the cat had recognized the latter's voice. "I think she likes you too," Jeno said, sparing the younger another smile, reaching his eyes.

Jaemin's breathe hitched at the sight of the older grinning. And damn, was his smile so attractive in his eyes.

 _How can an average human being be able to smile as eye-catching as that?_ Jaemin thought which was not so normal at all; he never really compliments anyone this openly in his mind.

"Y-you think so?"

Jeno nodded. "Yeah. She recognizes you after all."

Both stood just like that, admiring each other silently and the cat in the elder's arms. Jaemin's throat suddenly got dry although he wanted to talk to Jeno some more, to tell him anything just to keep the conversation going.

But before Jaemin could string a few words together, the cat suddenly jumped off the elder's arms, startling both males. They saw the cat head on off somewhere, leaving him behind with nothing to do but follow it as it disappeared from their sights.

When it was really gone, he turned to look back at Jeno, who happen to had been staring at him but they didn't say anything after that.

"It's getting pretty dark out, aren't you heading off home?" the older suddenly asked, clearing his throat before that, trying to continue the dialogue when he deemed it was starting to get awkward with them just eyeing at each other stealthily.

The question made the younger widened his eyes almost instantly.

Oh, shoot. He forgot about Mark and Donghyuk!

"Y-yeah. I am," he retorted, trying not to sound like he was panicking. But in hindsight, he was alarmed. He fished for his phone in his pocket; making sure that Jeno won't notice that something was wrong him, lowly cursing as he saw a dozen angry messages from his best friend as he scrolled down through his cellular device.

_> > Where are you?_

_> > We can't find him anywhere._

_> > Let's call it a day._

_> > Seriously. Where are you?!_

_> > Na Jaemin, have the decency to reply to me even just once!_

_> > Don't be stubborn. We can't find Jeno at this rate._

_> > Whatever. I'm going home._

_> > Call me when you had decided to be rational and went home too._

Damn.

Why hadn't he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket when the older had texted him? Was he really that preoccupied with finding Jeno that he hadn't notice?

He was ready to type back a reply, looking intently into the screen, but the sudden question, "Where do you live, by the way?" from Jeno made him stop half way to turn back to him.

Wait. Was Jeno asking him what he thinks he's saying?

He blanked out for moment there, wasn't sure what to reply. "About 6 blocks away from here," he answered.

The older hummed.

"You?" Jaemin asked back, genuinely curious.

"Around 8, not that far," Jeno replied. "Wanna walk home together?"

Wait what?

And just like that, he forgot to text Donghyuck back.

 _Oh well, he had gone home with Mark-hyung anyway_ , Jaemin thought.

"S-sure." He was stammering like an idiot.

_Nice going, Jaemin._

The walk back home from school was pretty quiet; it wasn't the awkward kind of quiet though, it was just _quiet_. And honestly, even though it was a contrast to his usual hyper personality, Jaemin found the sort of silence they shared to be comforting in a way.

A few minutes being with the older and Jaemin was sure that he preferred being discreet. How the soft spoken Lee Jeno was best friends with the out-going Mark Lee was a big mystery to Na Jaemin. They were the exact opposite of each other in so many ways, how come they are so close?

Guess this goes to show that one shouldn't judge a person discretely like that.

As they walked along the road, the younger would steal quick glances of the older if he had the chance, being extra careful not to be seen. But when he did it again once, he got caught as Jeno was already staring at him before he did. As their eyes locked for a second, Jaemin quickly looked away, embarrassed that he was caught in the act. He heard Jeno let out a breathy chuckle after that, the younger trying his best to resist temptation to look at the older anymore.

 _What is he thinking?_ Jaemin couldn't help but ask himself, given that the guy besides him, with crescent moon-like shaped eyes whenever he threatens to grin, appeared so timid, so secretive.

_It won't seem that I'm too desperate to talk to him once I started talking, right?_

"Jeno," he muttered softly, in hopes of starting another conversation to lift up the sullen mood– not that he has any complains though. But having to talk to Jeno was better compared to just walking beside him. He was curious of a lot of things concerning the older and if this was the only chance he would get of asking him anything then he would gladly obliged.

At the sudden mention of his name, the elder's brows raised out of disbelief. "So, you know my name?" Jeno found it amusing, in a somewhat flattering manner the fact that the younger knows his name, especially when he hasn't even introduced himself yet.

"Yeah. I sort of got it from Donghyuck."

 _So he was a friend of Donghyuck's, what a coincidence_ , Jeno thought.

"I never told you my name though," Jaemin added, remembering that very important detail he still hasn't done. Why hasn't he told him yet? This was his chance!

 _You don't need to._ "Nana, right?" Jeno asked, being suddenly reminded of the sad truth that he wasn't the guy he thought he was before.

It was Jaemin's turn to stare at the other in disbelief. "How come you know my nickname?"

 _Nickname?_ The older male shrugged, hands grasping onto the strap of his backpack out of habit. "At the party, remember? Ten-hyung called you that so I assumed it was your name."

"You're friends with Ten-hyung?"

"Sort of," he responded. Well, they weren't exactly that close in any extent but they belong in the same group of friends. It counts right? "You?" He had been meaning to ask Jaemin this. At the party, as both Ten and the other converse across him, they seem pretty close, a certain air of familiarity prolonged between them and of course, it hadn't escaped Jeno's observing gaze.

"Yeah," the younger nodded. "And Nana is just a nickname, Ten-hyung likes calling me that. I know, it's lame right?" he joked. He never really understood why Ten insisted on calling him Nana instead of just Jaemin though. The older male claimed it was because Nana was cuter but Jaemin was having other thoughts. And yes, Ten always gets what he wants and he wouldn't want it any other way and so, no matter how weird the nickname sounded, the younger didn't argue and let the older use the endearment on him. Oh well, as years passed, Jaemin had gotten used to it.

But Jeno disagreed with the younger's motion. "I think it's pretty cute actually. It suits you," he said, never failing to smile like he usually does. What is it with Jeno and smiling that it just come off naturally and doesn't look forced? If you asked Jeno, he wasn't really sure what had gone into him when he said those words.

Jaemin flushed at the underlying meaning of the assertion. It was a compliment, right?

He looked away again, afraid that the older will notice the blush that had formed across his face and Jaemin would be damned if someone saw him in an embarrassed state.

"Two more right and it would be my house," the older suddenly announced, noticing the street sign in the suburb-area that they were at, surrounded with domestic houses, realizing that they close to their block.

As he took noticed of the same sign board, Jaemin felt pang of sadness which was foreign for him, thinking that Jeno was right, they were almost home. "Oh, okay. My house is in the other direction," he informed.

Jeno nodded, taking into account what he had said.

Jaemin, as they silently made their way, wished that they may be able to talk more but it seemed impossible now knowing that they were nearing to their farewell.

"So I guess we part here," Jeno said when they were at an obvious intersection, which apparently separated their houses in either directions.

"Yeah," Jaemin mumbled, sounding disappointed but low enough for Jeno not to hear. "Nice meeting you by the way Jeno."

"My pleasure. See you tomorrow?" the older asked, trying not to sound too hopeful for the matter.

Jaemin smiled at the request, eagerly nodding his head as a reply. "Sure. I'd love that."

After another round of goodbyes and promises that they'll meet again the day after, they both went on different directions, backs turned on each other, distance slowly increasing with each step. Jeno found it weird that somehow he felt empty with every stride he took away from the other. What was this?

As Jeno made his way down the street, uncaring anymore, he heard someone calling for him from behind, shouting his name.

"Hey Jeno!"

He turned around, confused as to why the younger called for him. From afar it would seem like Jaemin still hadn't left and was looking at him.

"What?" the older had raised his voice a bit to let the younger hear since he was already quite far away, eyes squinting as he couldn't make out the figure anymore.

"I never got the chance to tell you my real name properly!" Jaemin shouted.

Jeno blinked twice, waiting for what he was about to say next.

He was far but Jeno couldn't be mistaken that the other had a bright smile on his face as he blurted out his name for the entire neighbourhood to hear before he fled and left in a hurry, leaving Jeno glued on his feet as the older broke into his signature eye-smile.

"I'm Na Jaemin, don't ever forget that!" the younger's proclamation lingering in the back of his mind as he resumed his steps and made his way home.

\--

Upon arriving at their block, his family's three-storey modern looking polished marble house coming to view, he took note at how early he came home today compared to the other days where he'd preferred being alone and would just walk all the way from school to his house.

 _Past the quarter of seven in the evening. That's new._ Jeno thought as he quickly spared a glance at his wrist watch.

The gate was already open, as if they were expecting him to arrive any moment now. He already knew what to expect when he came home; just as the door went slightly ajar, the household maids and the butlers would all be lined up, bowing, greeting him and telling him that dinner is already served and that they were just waiting for him.

This is what he had grown up to and no matter how much he wished for that usual scenario to change every single day; it just seemed impossible.

Well, what did Jeno expect? It's not like he could do something about it. Besides, he had already gone used it.

The moment he opened the door, the scene he already memorized a million times replayed before him; the maids had lined up, bowed and welcomed him back. He spared all of them a tired smile before he stood face to face with the Lee Family's head butler.

"Young master, welcome home," Mr. Lim greeted, motioning for the maid to his right to take Jeno's back that was loosely slanged on his shoulder. "You're home quiet early today."

Although he didn't want to bother them, he gave his bag to the maid who offered to take it from him. "Yeah. I didn't get to roam around today," Jeno replied simply.

"I see. Then I can assume that you're hungry?" asked the older man, smiling at the younger.

"Oh no Mr. Lim, I am fine," he declined the offer. "I don't feel hungry tonight."

The younger saw the older frowned. "Then we'll have to eat without you once again sir," the butler sighed while giving Jeno an all knowing look.

Jeno felt a tinge of guilt at the disappointed look the older male had on his face when he told him didn't want to eat dinner. Mr. Lim had been working for his family even before he was born, he was practically his second father with the way the older takes care of him; especially that his parents aren't around most of the time.

"Please do Mr. Lim. Have a nice dinner," the teen said kindly before he took his leave and made his way to his bedroom.

After bathing, he immediately started doing his homework, reviewing some of their lessons for exams were fast approaching and he needed to revise as early as possible to get good marks, even finishing reading a book then he started feeling hungry in the middle of it.

He looked at the wall clock inside his room to see that it is already past twelve, meaning everybody inside the house is already asleep or in their own quarters.

Jeno then decided to go the kitchen to cook his own dinner.

And yes. He usually has dinner at this hour.

He quietly made his way out his room, down the stairs and into the kitchen, making sure that he hadn't made a single noise to have woken up the staff.

When he was in the kitchen quarters, he opened the fridge— good thing his personal chef doesn't lock it at night, to look at what would be suitable to eat at such an hour. After deciding on a simple dish to cook that won't be heavy for digestion since he still had to sleep right after for he had 7 o'clock classes in the morning, he went straight to cooking, carefully turning on the electric stove.

As he was in the midst of preparing his food; mixing some sort of soup he had in a pot, a small smile slowly ghosted his face as he recalled what happened just then before he went home.

If someone would see him right now, they'd think he was insane but Jeno couldn't really help it, he was just so happy.

No matter how he tries to, Jeno still can't believe that the Jaemin he had in his mind; the one with the kitten and the Jaemin that Mark and Donghyuck had wanted him to meet and the one Ten called 'Nana' are the same person.

Fate was really funny. It was playing with him somehow.

As he thought about it more, it had been stupid of him to ditch both his best friend and Donghyuck at the party just because he didn't want to meet Jaemin in the first place, thinking he was a whole different person, without giving the latter a chance to get to meet him.

Oh well, all things happen for a good reason, Jeno believes.

He recalled once again how lovely Jaemin looked while he had the small feline in his arms as he stared at him with a pair of equally beautiful dark chocolate orbs and a blinding yet calming smile.

Completely forgetting about the food that he was cooking, he smiled.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been so long since the last update. TT But the sem is done, yey! *dances to firetruck*  
> Get well soon Nana! We miss you. TT

* * *

 

Jeno woke up with a smile ghosting his face as he took off the soft sheets tangled around his body while he pushed himself off his bed and stood up, made his way to the bathroom to prepare for another day in school.

“Would you like some more milk, young sir?” Mr. Lim asked him when he was in front of the dining room table after getting ready, eating his breakfast.

He turned to look at the elder and nodded, “Yes please.”

Calling for one of the maids to get Jeno the dairy drink he had asked for, the older man then stood behind the younger’s chair, watching over him as he ate and declined the offer of joining him when Jeno asked.

“You seem happy today young sir. I take it that something might have happened to put you in such a good mood early in the morning,” he commented, noticing the small yet quite obvious changes in the younger; the slight gleam in his eyes like as if he was enthusiastic about something- it was subtle but it was still there nonetheless.

The statement had caught Jeno off guard, of course, but he didn’t replied, instead, he hid back a smile when he took another bite of the pancakes he was eating and continued on without making much room available for further conversation.

It might appear rude to some, the older man however, hadn’t put much thought into it since he was pretty used to Jeno’s odd behaviour every now and then. The way the younger’s lips curled up definitely didn’t left unnoticed by the head butler of the Lee household yet he decided to not ponder on the topic any longer, allowing his young master to eat in peace and drown himself in thoughts that were bound to be flooding his mind.

After breakfast and saying his goodbyes, Jeno made his way out of the house and headed to school. It was just another usual day- he ate breakfast, walked to school in silence, his schoolmates making small dialogues with him if they happen to pass by and alike.

There was nothing special about that day to be honest. But somehow, it was different for Jeno. It might have been the tinge feeling of excitement he had as he made his way inside their university. He wasn’t sure where that sort of feeling came from but he wasn’t going to complain. Amidst it all, it felt right.

Somehow, everything was perfect.

“What is your problem hyung?!”

Okay.. so maybe it wasn’t.

Jeno had just arrived at their classroom and the sight that welcomed him wasn’t an ideal one, not when it was still early in the morning.

“Shut up or I’ll tell your boyfriend you’re flirting with someone else behind his back,” Mark said through gritted teeth.

“I’m not flirting with anyone,” Chen Le countered, frowning at the older male. “You’re the one making the wrong conclusions here.”

Both stood across one another, getting on each other’s face and both seemed pissed at something, exchanging angry cries.

“What’s going on?” Jeno asked Winwin, who was sitting on his seat which was just behind his, not minding his friends that are fighting in front of him when the younger went to his desk and dropped his bag on the wooden table.

The older spared him a small glance as a greeting when he stared up from his phone, hadn’t even noticed that Jeno already arrived if he hadn’t said anything. “Mark is being bitchy,” Winwin answered with a shrug, uncaring that Mark was even in the same room as him.

The former mentioned then turned to the older when he heard his name. “I’m not!”

“Yes, he is. He has been like that since yesterday.” Winwin rolled his eyes at him, clearly unimpressed, before turning to Jeno when the younger asked for an explanation and clarified, “He was with Donghyuck yesterday and Chen Le and I passed by them at the convenience store when we were on the way home-”

“Wait, you went home with Donghyuck?” Jeno cut the elder’s explanation off to ask, directed to his best friend.

Sensing the younger’s attention on him, Mark snickered when he turned to look back, momentarily forgetting the banter he was having with Chen Le as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Don’t talk to me. I’m still pissed at you for leaving me in the air like that.”

Knowing what Mark was talking about, Jeno frowned; guilt washing over him as he recalls what he did to the older the day before; leaving him behind when Mark clearly told him that they were supposed to meet Donghyuck. “I didn’t mean it. I just wanted to be left alone,” he started off, sounding genuinely sorry for his actions. “I’m sorry for causing you any trouble.”

No matter how hard headed he might seem, everyone knew that Mark will always have a soft spot for Jeno no matter what and would let him get away with anything. And perhaps Jeno was aware with that and is using it to his advantage to not let Mark’s hatred for him linger any further. This bastard, Mark thought.

“You could have texted me where we were, you know,” the older sighed. Even though he knew why Jeno did those things that he did, it wouldn’t change the fact that he was really disappointed with what the younger had done. It wasn’t like Jeno to leave him in such a mess. “I was worried sick and Donghyuck got mad because you ditched us.”

“He did?” Jeno was still frowning.

“At first,” he clarified, sensing that the younger would be sad at the thought of letting other people worry about him, like Mark worrying over him wasn’t enough. “But Jaemin sorted the whole thing out.”

“Jaemin?” His voice sounded different at the mention of the latter’s name.

Mark noticed it of course. He raised a questioning brow at the younger. “Didn’t you receive any of my messages?”

Jeno shook his head. He was aware that he had indeed received a bunch of messages but didn’t have the time to look at them yesterday especially after meeting and talking to Jaemin. Heck, he hadn’t even opened his phone when he got back home.

“Well, we went looking for you,” Mark explained. “It wasn’t my idea ‘cause I know we wouldn’t be able to find you but Jaemin was the one who suggested and insisted it in the first place.”

Jeno didn’t respond, but instead he tilted his head a little, prompting the older to continue talking, the sudden perk of interest showed after hearing Jaemin’s idea of searching for him.

“It was to calm Donghyuck down since he was really pissed,” he paused, “and maybe he did that so the both of you to finally meet? I don’t know, I’m just assuming things.”

Mark only said those words in attempt to make his best friend feel guilty over his actions but the younger’s reaction wasn’t the sort of reaction the older had excepted to see on him.  Instead of seeing eyes visible with regret, Jeno’s mirrored that of being shocked and was boarding close to delight at the same time.

 Bearing the younger’s expression in mind; Mark had his brows knitted together, thoughts getting worked up all of a sudden while looking at his best friend as if he was some kind of experimental subject laid out in front of him.

Jeno, on hence sight, was weirded out by his best friend who was gawking at him with mischievous eyes, as if he had known something that concerned him and that he can use it against Jeno to black mail the younger with it. Okay.. maybe he was being a bit paranoid.

“Jeno, you know what?” he started. “You seem rather more interested in whatever I say whenever Jaemin’s name gets mentioned. Is there something you should be telling me Lee Jeno?” asked Mark with a smirk, wiggling both his eyebrows at the other in a playful manner.

 _What does he want to know?_ Jeno asks himself with a frown as he started enumerating things in his head that Mark possibly wants him to reveal.

 _Does he want me to tell him that I met Jaemin and that I want to know more about him that’s why I seem interested whenever his name gets mentioned? Is that what Mark’s getting worked up for?_ Jeno thought as he avoided the curious gaze of Mark had on him, making him self-conscious.

When he evaded the elder’s looks, he noticed that Chenle was somehow attempting to get away from his best friend’s sight. He too was probably getting tired of their banter already.

“Uh, Mark, had you finished your business with Chenle already?” Jeno couldn’t help but ask, trying to divert the elder’s attention away from him. He wasn’t actually avoiding the question. He just didn’t know how to answer. It was something entirely different, right?

He saw the younger gave him a betrayed look which he returned with an apologetic smile.

_Sorry Le._

After hearing the younger’s name, Mark quickly shifted his attention back to Chenle, forgetting about what he had asked Jeno after remembering how sweet Donghyuck and the said male seemed yesterday afternoon only to fire him up more, getting angry again.

“Are you planning to get away from me Zhong Chenle?” he immediately asked.

“What are you saying hyung? I’m trying to have my peaceful life back here!”

“Huh! We still aren’t finish young man. You still have a lot of explaining to do.”

“What more of an explanation do you need? I already told you everything but you wouldn’t listen!” the younger barked.

And just like that, Jeno got ignored immediately, the two exchanging harsh yet fruitless words. Right after, the former exhaled the air he didn’t know he had been holding in. He turned to look at Winwin who seemed to be in his own world as well, in a daze; sights focused somewhere far, trying to keep the smile that’s forcing its way to the older male’s face.

_Something good must have happened or is he remembering something?_

The younger does not want to break Winwin’s train of thought since the older appeared too engrossed in them, but he can’t help it, Jeno was still curious as to why Mark and Chenle were fighting like cats and dogs. He cleared his throat. “So what you were saying again a while ago hyung?”

“Huh?” He turned to look at Jeno before he remembered. “Ahh, yes. Sorry. Where was I again? Nevermind. As I was saying,” and the older male continued on his story on what had happened that afternoon.

According to Winwin, he offered Mark and Donghyuck a ride home when they saw them walking which the both gladly accepted. Everything was going smoothly until Mark noticed the overly friendly air between Chenle and Donghyuck that he hadn’t seen before through the reflection of the car’s mirror since both were at the back and Mark was riding shotgun besides Winwin and somehow, it made him suspicious.

“We dropped Donghyuck off first and the funny thing is Mark didn’t know that Donghyuck had a huge crush on Chenle when they were still in middle school together if I haven’t told him when he asked why they seemed so close and is chewing him alive right now.”

“Woah, he did?” Jeno widened his eyes slightly. He hadn’t expected this sudden revelation. Donghyuck liked Chenle, who knew?

“Apparently he did,” the older male answered. “He even almost came to the point of wanting to court Lele. You didn’t know?” Winwin asked as if that information was already known to all.

“I didn’t,” he answered truthfully, turning to his best friend, asking for him to elaborate but the older wasn’t looking at him.

The latter snorted, skin crawling at the very thought of Donghyuck liking someone else. “See? Even Jeno didn’t saw it coming!” Mark exclaimed.

 “It’s not my fault I’m adorable,” now it was Chenle who added. “And besides, it was ages ago. Let it go already!”

“I won’t,” the other snapped at him. “That’s it, I’m calling your boyfriend. I’m telling on you.”

“You wish,” the younger answered back with a snicker. “How would you even do that? You don’t even have his contact number or what.”

“But I have Jeno,” Mark pointed out. “And he’s his cousin.”

“Leave Jeno out of this Mark,” Winwin interjected. “Lele’s right, move on already.”

“You’re teaming up on me!” Mark accusingly said as he pointed at the two Chinese males. “Jeno, help me out on this!”

But Jeno wasn’t willing to offer his assistance, he made no reply. Mark was his best friend, true, but fighting a lost battle wasn’t something Jeno was keen on doing. He decided that Mark had to sort this out on his own.

“You are being immature hyung,” the youngest rolled his eyes at the older as he too crossed his arms; staring at him, indifferent. “I don’t like him in that kind of way even before I was still single. Why would you think I’m going after him now?”

“Cause I saw you talking to him and you were smiling!” Mark countered.

“And how does smiling to a friend equal to flirting?”

“Shut up, Jeno. Don’t butt in.” Mark hissed at him.

The latter could only raise his hands in the air in defeat and barely resisted the urge to sigh out loud. Why did he even bother?

“Mark, being in love doesn’t suit you. You’re being stupid.”

Chenle took this as a chance and turned his heel, ready to leave; feeling pissed at what the older had been saying. It was the same damn thing for a few minutes now and his patience was growing thin.

“Where are you going?!” Mark asked when he saw the younger turned his back on him.

“Somewhere away from you before my I.Q drops!” he shouted, not bothering to glance back.

Jeno shook his head in disapproval at the display of unnecessary drama that his friends are presenting inside their classroom. Wasn’t cringe-worthy drama series shown daily on television enough? Are they actually forced to see it first hand and in real life now?

The former was aware that their classmates, who tried their best not to pry but failed, had been staring at their group for quite some time because of Mark and Chenle’s squabble but he paid it no mind at all since Jeno was somehow used to it and just focused at his two arguing friends.

He situated himself on his seat as he also tried to block out the noises the two were making yet it was futile after hearing Chenle shout, “Leave me alone hyung!”

Jeno could only sigh as he stared behind Mark’s back as the latter stalked the younger at the door, not backing out from their argument. He faced Winwin, wanting him to salvage the situation before it turned out bad, but it appeared like the older didn’t care what was going on with the two; too engrossed on typing something on his phone.

_What was he even doing?_

_Texting Kun-hyung? Hmm, maybe. Who else would it be then?_

Jeno rested his chin on his palm for support as he wondered when Mark and Chenle’s useless argument will ever end. Thinking that Mark had the tendency to hold grudges whenever it concerned a certain maroon-haired male, Jeno sighed. The possibility of them, to ever stop fighting, deemed as something impossible in this case.

He continued watching, observing them, until he saw someone enter the room.

“What’s going on?”

It was Donghyuck.

 _It is bound to be more entertaining_ , Jeno thought.

“W-what are you doing here?” Mark managed to ask with widened eyes, not expecting the other’s presence. “Don’t you have class?”

“Oh. Morning classes were cancelled. Haven’t they told you yet?” Donghyuck answered sheepishly before he noticed the situation he had conveniently arrived in. “Anyway, what were you talking about?”

Mark was flustered at the sudden query, Jeno could tell.

“H-huh? No-nothing! We were talking about nothing!” he said defensively.

 “Really?” suspicion rich in Donghyuck’s voice.

Mark nodded vigorously before sparing everyone in the room a short glare, clearing saying that if they ratted him out on Donghyuck and tell the younger what he and Chenle were arguing about moments ago, they were good as dead.

Jeno could care less that Mark was speechless as he covered Chenle’s mouth when the younger attempted to say something- probably to embarrass the older since his crush is here- and that Donghyuck had his brows raised at the two.

Jeno’s entire attention was focused somewhere else.

On someone else.

The person trailing behind Donghyuck’s back had come to view. His head hang low- probably feeling giddy of visiting the special class’ room, both hands stuffed in his pockets and he, too, was firstly observing Mark’s rather weird behaviour when he came in but a second later, he turned to look at Jeno’s direction. The latter’s breath was caught in his throat when the other noticed him and smiled.

He made his way from the door to where Jeno’s desk was without second thoughts. With each step, it was as if time had slowed down and Jeno was entranced, the younger’s dark brown hair bouncing with every eager stride he took from across the room until it fell softly to his eyes. He looked amazing.

It seemed like forever until the younger now stood before him, Jeno looked up and was greeted by a warm yet shy smile. “H-hi.”

It took a lot of self-mastered control before Jeno was able to answer, “hi,” without stuttering.

Both didn’t say anything after that, they were just quietly watching the other, admiring silently. They were with each other yesterday but why did it seem like it had been a long time since Jeno had last glanced the younger’s stunning features this close?

_What is this feeling?_

They were lost in their own world that they hadn’t noticed that the other four people in the four cornered space were gawking at them, in both confusion and shock.

“You know each other?”

The sudden question from Winwin ruptured the invisible bubble they shared.

“W-what?” it was Jaemin who asked, embarrassed for he might or might not have been staring at the light-brown haired male longer than necessary.

_Shit. What would Donghyuck think now?_

It would seem that they had managed to catch their attention. From the corner of his eyes, Jeno was certain he saw Winwin was staring with disbelief at them.

Chenle, after harshly taking Mark’s hand off his mouth, gave the older a heated glare before he turned to the two males across them with a frown of his face, mind filled with thoughts immediately after seeing Jeno and Jaemin greet each other.

_I thought they don’t know each other? Did Jeno-hyung lie at me? But I know he wouldn’t do that. Then how? Aish! This is making my head ache!_

Donghyuck was gaping at the two, jaws dropped as he neared them for further interrogation. Mark, on the other hand, was dumbfounded knowing that the two had managed to know each other without his knowledge, making him unable to move from his spot. Seeing that Chenle also made his way besides Winwin, whose eyes were gleaming with curiosity, Mark followed suit and stood beside Donghyuck.

 “How did,” Donghyuck was looking at Jaemin before he turned to Jeno, “this happen?”

Jeno wasn’t sure how to answer the question. But Mark and Chenle were throwing him looks, demanding an answer to fill their curiosity. “It just did,” he replied.

Jeno knew his answer wasn’t enough to satisfy those questioning looks his friends had on them but he couldn’t think of any other way of telling them how it happened, all he knew is that, it just did. He even couldn’t explain to his self, what more to other people?

“Jaemin, explain.” Donghyuck demanded, knowing that Jeno was useless at this point. He wanted to know and he needed answers and his best friend better tell him what had gone down or he’ll regret it.

The said male flinched when his name was called, he didn’t want to be the one to talk about how he and Jeno met but as soon as he realize that all eyes were on him, he knew there was no escape, especially with that piercing gaze his best friend threw at him. He slowly looked at them first, before glancing at Jeno who also didn’t know what to say.

 _For both of your relief,_ the younger thought and sighed.

“Remember when we were looking for him?” he started. “It was getting dark and I wanted to go home already but somehow, he appeared out of nowhere. We talked and introduced ourselves then went home,” he said easily. It was short and brief but he knew they’d understand.

“So that’s why you didn’t reply to any of my texts,” Donghyuck nodded thoughtfully, one hand on his chin.

Jeno gave him this look. Jaemin was sure it was to question why he didn’t tell them about the cat incident or about them going home together. Jaemin thought it wasn’t needed.

They could live without knowing completely what happened.

“So you found him just like that?” Mark was beyond surprised and impressed. He was never able to find Jeno if he disappeared on him but somehow, Jaemin did.

“Yeah,” he turned to look Jeno when he answered, seeing that the other was also staring back at him, he couldn’t help but smile, “I found him.”

Jeno smiled back.

* * *

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the overlooked errors.   
> MERRY CHRISTMAS! :)

After all the drama and Donghyuck prying on how they met, Jeno and Jaemin became very good friends; they grew close and everyone warmed up to the idea that they would be around each other often. Jaemin and Donghyuck would hang out with them in their classroom after lunch. It had turned into their little routine; even Chenle and Winwin would join them sometimes— if Winwin wasn’t too busy pestering Kun that is.

Every day at school, usually in their last class in the morning, Jeno would notice the palpable longing luminous in Mark’s eyes whenever the latter stares into oblivion, brows slightly twitching for he was deep in thought. But Jeno knew that the older was just excited— excited for the lunch bell to ring, a signal that their two friends from the other class would come by and meet them and Jeno would be lying if he denied he wasn’t eager to see a certain male.

“Has Ten-hyung already told you guys?” Donghyuck asked one day when they had already eaten lunch and were gathered at the back most part of the room, sprawled on the floor, chatting when Donghyuck decided to bring the topic up.

“About?”

“I’m not talking to you,” he snapped at Jaemin when he asked which made the latter snicker.

“Well you didn’t specify who you’re talking to, how was I to know that you’re not talking to me?” he argued back, earning a chuckle from the others, amused by his witty reply.

“Shut up!” Donghyuck glared at all of them, feeling crossed that they were laughing right in front of his face. Talk about lack of decency. Can’t they see that he was at a dilemma here?

Apparently, both had an argument beforehand and weren’t actually keen about hiding it from them at all. “Well, what is it anyway?” Mark asked just in time before Donghyuck exploded— and he would prefer his day to be peaceful rather that coaxing a pissed Donghyuck— reaching for the other’s shoulder, trying to get him to relax.

Feeling the elder’s fingers brush faintly against his shoulder, he flinched, shrugging the elder’s hand off. Mark frowned— feeling rejected— retrieved his hand before Donghyuck cleared his throat, shooing the butterflies fluttering in the pit of his stomach away. “Ehem. As I was saying, he’s planning a small party. He told me a few days ago and wants everyone to come.”

“A party again?” Chenle made a face, insensible of the bizarre way the older was acting around Mark. “No thanks.”

Memories of the Ten’s birthday party flooded Chenle’s mind and his desire of going through the same misery like last time wasn’t profound, thankyouverymuch. Ten’s party just meant trouble for the youngest.

“It’s not the usual type of party that he throws, Le. It’s just a small gathering,” Donghyuck further explained, “just us and the hyungs, this weekend.”

“That sounds fun,” Winwin commented, somehow liking the idea and turned to the youngest, urging him to go with him. “I’m in, so Le’s going with.”

At the sound of Chenle whining at the eldest for making decisions on his own, Mark looked over at Jeno, sanguine that the younger might sit out again just like he had on the prior parties Ten and the others had invited him to. As he felt his best friend’s familiar gaze fixated on him, Jeno stared back, waited for the older to say something; the look Mark gave him made him thought so.

“What?”

“How about it Jeno?” Mark prompted. “Are you gonna come or not?”

He blinked a couple of times, uncertain on how to answer the query.

“You’re thinking of not going?” Jaemin asked, genuinely curious when he regarded him.

“I’m not so sure.”

“Jeno doesn’t really like parties,” Winwin commented. “Are you going?” he asked, referring to Jaemin.

“Well, me and Donghyuck are definitely coming since Ten-hyung has been bugging me nonstop about it,” Jaemin trailed off, scratched the tip of his nose out of habit, sounded a bit shy which made Donghyuck look at him, rather sceptical. “Would you come too?” eyes on Jeno when he questioned again.

Jeno looked up and searched Jaemin’s eyes when he turned. The young lad wasn’t definite on what he was looking for exactly but the tiny gleam in his eyes and the way Jaemin bit his lower lip, hands balled into fists resting against his knees, mindful that the older was staring at him before he diverted his gaze somewhere else other than Jeno’s; it made him assume that probably, _probably,_ Jaemin wanted him to be there.

Or was he being too hopeful?

Jeno sighed, finally decisive.

“Okay then, count me in.”                                                                 

* * *

 

The small gatherings they had as a group weren’t extravagant; it was the simplest kind— dinner, a few games, and barbeque. The younger kids had arrived earlier, were scattered on Ten’s living room floor, playing a video game, Ten had took out from his room, attached to the flat screen television to keep them busy while they wait for the food to be cooked.

“Hey hyung, is Jeno coming?” Chenle asked Donghyuck, both were playing a street fighter game against each other.

“Isn’t he with Mark-hyung?” Jaemin, who was their spectator, sat beside the older and asked.

“I already texted Mark. He said he’s on his way but he didn’t mention if Jeno was with him or not,” the other answered, eyes still focused on the telly, fingers busy pushing too many buttons at the same time.

Jaehyun, Mark’s brother, came early with his boyfriend, Doyoung, in toll and said that the younger would be arriving late since he had something else to do.

Jaemin arrived alongside Yuta and Hansol. He was supposed to go with Donghyuck but the older males insisted he came with them and as much as he wanted to escape their not-so-subtle, shameless flirting, when Hansol— nevermind his brother— asks him anything, Jaemin could never say no.

“Maybe Jeno decided not to come after all,” Winwin, cuddled on the couch with his boyfriend, oblivious that the younger kid’s found the scene disgusting, added. “We all know him.”

Jaemin frowned at the assertion but chose not to believe it and made no comment. Jeno said he would come so he would most definitely be there, he was sure of it. Maybe he was just running in late? Jaemin thought.

But it would have seemed like everyone thought otherwise. Apparently, they had anticipated that Jeno wouldn’t come and hadn’t asked many questions as to where the boy was. They have gotten used that whenever Jaemin is around, Jeno isn’t or vice versa.

So it definitely came as a shock to everyone when Jeno arrived much later on that night, trailing behind Mark, both looking completely handsome when the door was opened for them. Both boys were wearing casual clothes just like the rest of them but somehow the clothes they wore on their backs became unworthy of them, they outshone everything in the vacancy.

Jaemin was awestruck when he saw the two strutting— Mark maybe, Jeno was just pacing quietly, hands stuffed in his pockets— as they walked in when Johnny opened the door. What is it with them and why do they seem dangerously attractive tonight?

And of course, their hyungs noticed. Jaemin heard Johnny blurted out side comments as the two made their way towards them; Kun even wolf whistled, causing the others to break into fits of laughter.

“Hey Mark, why did you dress up? Trying to impress someone?” Seeing that the younger had indeed styled himself up that night, and even did something with his hair that made it look twice as nice as it usually is, Jaehyun teased.

Loving the attention, Mark threw a mischievous smirk their way and Jaemin was sure his best friend was a blushing mess besides him, forgetting about the game that they were playing, gawking at the newly arrived guests.

Ten, who had just got out of the kitchen with Taeyong, after noticing the duo’s arrival, made a beeline for them. Mark greeted the night’s host with a casual smile which the older gladly reciprocated. He then turned to Jeno and immediately caught him in tight embrace, shocking the younger, stumbling backwards before he caught himself.

“Uhh, hyung?” Jeno tried his best not to squirm or show any sign of discomfort but Ten hugging him wasn’t normal and the younger found the whole situation quite odd. Mark hadn’t said anything, just stared at the two with a grin.

“Oh! Sorry Jeno. I’m just so glad you came,” Ten said cheerfully, released the younger, “come this way,” and ushered the two like VIP guests to where the rest were at the living room.

“You’re staring,” a whisper from behind Jaemin came.

“What?” He turned his head faintly and scowled as he saw the other smirk at him, arms rested against the couch, body slightly bended as he followed the younger’s gaze, nevertheless, Jaemin found his sight unconsciously returning to Jeno.

“You _are_ staring,” his older brother, Yuta, repeated, sounded amused. It was a good thing Donghyuck— still staring at Mark—  hadn’t been paying them any attention or he would have heard what Yuta said and Jaemin knew he would be doomed if that happened.

“At?” he asked, not bothering to take his eyes off Jeno as the latter was enveloped in hugs by their hyungs. He smiled unintentionally as he saw the older chuckle when Jaehyun ruffled his hair and Doyoung patting his shoulder.

Yuta saw the way how Jaemin’s eyes tempered for a fraction of a second as it lingered on the other and snorted, “who else?”

“I’m not,” he denied. “You’re imagining things.” But Yuta knew better. He leered at him before he left and went back to Hansol, who was outside with Taeil.

“Sure, say whatever helps you sleep soundly at night.”

* * *

 

Jeno found it kind of awkward at first, being treated differently by the other hyungs, but knowing that they were only acting like that since they hardly see him at school and he seldom hangs out with their group, he decided to just be comfortable around them; laid back and enjoyed his self.

Everyone perceived the evident changes in the younger’s attitude that night; he was more sociable than he had ever been and he talked more than he usually does. He was livelier in some sense and somehow, it made him more handsome than he already was— if that was even possible.

Such thoughts remained unspoken for they fear of voicing them out loud, left Jeno in peace, not wanting the younger to feel like being happy was a crime, they did not dare questioned him.

Well, except for one person.

Taeyong just couldn’t sit still at all, squirming on his seat, feet tapping against the floor excessively and had been eyeing the younger the whole duration of the night— Taeyong was just too nosy for his own good. The other guys gave him weird looks when they caught what he was doing, like he was some sort of creep but paid it no mind and kept of thinking of a way to corner Jeno, to talk to him.

Heaven seemed to have heard his distress and gave him the chance he had been asking for. Everyone was already outside, at the garden. Jeno stood up from his seat silently and went to feast his eyes on the variety of floras on the nearest flower box, close to where the door towards the kitchen was. The younger kids— excluding him— were running around and playing tag while the older hyungs were setting up the tables and grill for the barbeque and yet he chose to admire the plants in silence instead of joining in— typical Lee Jeno.

“Hey kid.”

“Hi hyung,” Jeno greeted the older with a smile as Taeyong stood beside him.

“Uhh, so, why aren’t you joining them?” he asked, referring to the other kids, trying to start a conversation slowly, afraid he might make things awkward between them if he went directly to his point.

“I’m tired.”

“Ahh, I see,” the older scratched his nape uneasily, irresolute on what to say next.

_Damn it Lee Taeyong! Use your mouth and ask him straight! No more side topics!_

“So, uhm,” he stuttered, mentally cursing his self for being nervous. _Pull yourself together Taeyong, he’s just a kid!_

“Is there something you wanna talk about hyung?” the younger pried, sensing the elder’s struggles, wanting to ease his uneasiness.

“Huh? Ah, you see,” he looked around swiftly, in search of an alibi, Jeno waited for him to continue. “So, umhm, well.. Y-Yuta’s been pushing me to ask you this,” he said the first thing that came into his mind. _Why Yuta of all people?_

“Okay?” Jeno was certain that the older was lying but then decided to just play along. “What is it hyung?”

It took a lot of courage before Taeyong managed to blurt out, “are you seeing someone?”

One.

Two.

Three.

Jeno blinked three times, clueless, head trying to process what the older was talking about. “W-what?” The simple question threw him aback; he grew nervous, palms sweating. “N-no hyung. I’m not.”

“Really?” Not quite believing him, the older raised a bemused eyebrow at the younger.

_Where on earth did hyung get that idea from?_

“Really hyung.” Jeno replied, voice low, fearing that someone other than them would hear their conversation. The older nodded hesitantly in reply— still not convinced. “Why did you ask?”

“Yuta wanted to know.” Taeyong said simply but Jeno looked at him in a way like he was waiting for a confession or something. Taeyong couldn’t take it, he gave in. “And I’m also curious,” he finally admitted.

“Why?”

“Cause, you know,” he lagged off. “You seem happier.”

Jeno choked, disbelief clear on his face when he turned to stare at the older. “W-what?”

Almost immediately, the noticeable anxiety washed away and Taeyong grew at ease. He heaved a short breath before he answered, “anyone with eyes could see that you’re happy and this means a lot to us to see you like this.” His eyes relaxed as he spoke and Jeno appreciated the thought. His hyungs really did care so much for him.

“Well, something good might just have happened to me hyung,” he reasoned, hands digging into his pockets, in search of warmth since it was starting to get cold.

“That’s not what the air around you tells me,” the older countered as he shrugged. “It’s different. I could tell that it’s because of someone. Is it?”

The younger’s eyes immediately widened upon hearing his hyung’s other query. “I d-don’t know,” Jeno swore he would be left light headed at all these questions that Yuta, or should we say Taeyong, had for him.

“Awww. Our little Jeno is in love.” The former laughed as he ruffled Jeno’s hair roughly when he extended his arm, satisfied with the reaction the younger showed, and hadn’t snooped on the topic any more than he already had.

“Hyung, I’m not a little kid anymore,” Jeno whined, not liking his hair being messed with.

“I know. You grew up too fast,” the older sighed thoughtfully, gave the other’s head a soft caress, full of affection, before he took a step back.

“Well, every person grows up the same way I did. Some just matures earlier than the others.”

“Whatever you say kid,” Taeyong snorted at the sly remark, pulled his jacket towards his body when a sudden breeze came, body shivered at the sensation. “Well I gotta get back. Taeil-hyung needs help cooking and Doyoung will kill me if something gets burned in the kitchen if Winwin doesn’t stay away.”

Understanding his sentiments, Jeno bid his goodbyes but just when Taeyong was about to turn his heel and leave the younger, he mumbled, “whoever you have your sights on, that person is lucky.” He gave him one of those smiles he rarely shows— cause Taeyong is too cool for that— and left, made his way inside the house and into the kitchen.

“Thanks hyung,” Jeno whispered into thin air, voice inaudible as it drifted into the harsh gust of wind, unheard of.

* * *

 

As everyone was busy doing their own thing, Jaemin decided to help with arranging the tables and chairs outside so they could eat, but eyes never leaving Jeno even when he was doing the chore. The older was engrossed in a shared conversation with Taeyong from across where he was that he hadn’t noticed Jaemin gawking at him all this time.

“Nana, are you listening?” the sound of Ten’s slightly irritated voice brought him back to reality.

“W-what were you saying hyung?”

“You weren’t listening!” the older pouted, arms crossed against his chest, sulky that the younger was ignoring him.

“Sorry,” he apologized sheepishly, flushed crimson red. “I was looking at something.”

“What were you looking …” Ten turned slightly to the direction where Jaemin’s sight was at previously, eyes landing on a familiar figure, “oh…” before he turned back to him.

The tone on the elder’s voice made Jaemin suspicious. What was that supposed to mean?

“Seriously Nana? Lee Jeno?” Ten looked smug, clicking his tongue, sounded proud of what he had just discovered. “I should have known.”

His eyes widened at the underlying thought his hyung had with his assertion. “It’s not like that! We’re friends hyung!”

“I’ve noticed,” the older snorted before he sat down at one of the chairs he had been arranging and motioned the younger to sit beside him which Jaemin immediately complied. “What happened? I remember you two never talk before, I don’t think you’ve even met!” Ten exclaimed, hands in the air. “How come you two look so close right now?”

“I got to meet him properly.”

“And you like him,” the older concluded.

“No I don’t!” Jaemin answered defensively.

But Ten didn’t believe it. “I see nothing wrong with liking him at all. Jeno’s quite handsome if you ask me, tall, athletic just like you and also very smart,” he enumerated. “And I heard from Taeyong that the kid’s an amazing dancer too.”

“He is?”

“He’s the perfect catch, Nana,” then the older winked at Jaemin, wagged his eyebrows for extra effect. Jaemin hadn’t made a comment and Ten was about to tease him more about his profound crush before he saw someone coming towards them, it made Ten grin; he waved at the new comer.

“What’s happening?” asked Johnny when he sat down besides Ten, the younger scooting over to give the older space, after giving the Thai male a soft peck on the forehead and snaked his arm around his waist protectively out of habit which made Ten beam straightaway.

“Nana likes Jeno,” Ten answered nonchalantly, body leaned against the elder’s broad chest while Jaemin had his jaws dropped.

“Hyung!” Jaemin exclaimed, blushing furiously.

“That’s cool,” Johnny said, indifferent as well, “Mark and Donghyuck then you and Jeno.”

“Best friends, isn’t that sweet?” Ten cooed.

Jaemin just couldn’t believe this. “It’s not hyung. Besides, I’m not gay,” he admitted.

But Ten was quick to dismiss the topic, made a dismissive motion with his hand. “I never said you were, Nana.”

“But that doesn’t mean you can’t like guys as well. You could be bi,” Johnny interjected; hand caressing the younger’s hair, hearing him slightly mewl at the touch. If Jaemin wasn’t too shocked right now, he would have found the two to be very adorable.

“Can we not talk about this hyung?” Jaemin proposed, uncomfortable with the conversation.

“Ehh? Why not?”

“Just because,” the younger answered with a pout, reluctant about replying further. If you ask him, Jaemin hadn’t really questioned his sexuality before and now wasn’t really good time to so.

Ten sighed. “Hey listen here Nana. It doesn’t matter if you’re straight, bi, pan, gender fluid, asexual, or whatever. We’re still human beings, capable of feeling things, even those that we don’t want to feel. Remember that we can’t control our feelings but we have a say on what we can do with them. So whether you like Jeno or not, it’s definitely still your call.”

“Why are you telling me all of this hyung?” Jaemin titled his head, confused. “I don’t understand.”

“What Ten’s trying to say here is that,” Johnny answered in his boyfriend’s stead, trying to salvage the situation, “if you really do like him, don’t be idle and just be honest with yourself and him. If he likes you too, that’s good but if he doesn’t, at least you tried and he knows the way you feel about him,” he explained briefly. “Just be yourself.”

Even with Johnny’s help, Jaemin still didn’t get it.

* * *

 

Time passed by like a breeze and the party ended when Taeyong announced that the kids should head on home since they still had classes the next morning, earning numerous protests from Donghyuck and Chenle, saying “we aren’t little kids anymore”. But Taeyong’s resolve was firm and wouldn’t take no for an answer—he was absolute. After cleaning up the mess they made, everybody was on their way home.

Jaemin was at the backseat of his older brother’s car, head resting against his palm while staring afar through the window, his brother too engrossed in a conversation with Hansol that he hadn’t paid him any attention at all the entire ride. But the younger doesn’t mind; whenever those two are together they seem to be entranced in their own world to notice other people besides themselves. He found it disturbing at first— they were so sweet it was sickening— but Jaemin had grown used to it.

He stared at nothing in particular when he heaved a short sigh, turned his body so he could face the road this time. The slight movement caught Hansol’s attention; the older gave him a worried gaze reflected through the car’s mirror, clearly telling the younger that he was concerned, arms tightly gripping on the stirring wheel. The younger saw it and shook his head, gave him a weak smile as to tell the older he was alright. Yuta had fallen asleep, (how did that happened?) head leaned against Hansol’s shoulder while the latter drove the car. Jaemin doesn’t want to distract him anymore than he already has. But somehow, it was inevitable; Jaemin felt burdened, heart heavy, the weight of Ten’s words still lingering in the back on his head.

He might have had reached a conclusion already but Jaemin was still too confused to admit it to himself.

* * *

 

It was hushed, the air outside slightly humid, the sky still obscure, barely dawn when the sound of an old car engine arriving at their garage woke Jeno up from his sleep, disrupting his usual slumber.

At the unwanted noise, he groaned, stirred in his sleep as he pushed his self to slowly open his eyes, sight still dim as he took off the heavy duvet wrapped about his limbs. With heavy feet and an unwilling body, still tired from the party they had last night, he got up with a frown on his face, rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand to chase the drowsiness away, trying to see what sort of thing would have cause such a ruckus at this sort of time. He peered through the curtains of the window as he heard voices downstairs.

“They’re back,” he mumbled, eyes fixed on the moving shadows below. _This is that time of the year again?_

His gaze followed the newly arrived “couple” as they got out of a vintage looking car, being assisted by Butler Lim after the older man had bowed, other maids busy taking their luggage out of the truck. A woman, probably in her early-40s, greeted the head butler with a gentle nod as her male companion engaged in a low conversation with their trusty servant. The woman, whose beauty never aged with time, looked around the vacancy of their home; it had been awhile since they’ve been home, and somehow she found it alien and it was off-putting. Feeling as if she was being stared at from a distance, she turned, her eyes caught Jeno’s, the younger peeking out from his bed room window, watching them. She gently smiled at the teenage boy with a small wave, mouthed “sorry”, certain that he would understand.

 _Perhap, it was because of waking me up?_ But Jeno wasn’t so sure.

He slowly closed the curtains right after she had went inside, following behind the two men in front of her while Jeno headed back to his bed, thoughts of going back to sleep was tempting. As he was about to lie down, he took notice of the wall clock and time. Jeno decided, stood back up onto his feet and started to prepare for another school day.

When he finished getting ready, he perceived that the house was once again quiet, not one sound was made when it should have been noisy considering they were back.

_Maybe they went to sleep to get rid of the jet lag?_

Jeno was light on his feet, making not much noise as he made his way downstairs swiftly, but when he reached the door and was about to open it, he heard a feminine voice call for him from behind.

“Lee Jeno, where do you think you’re going this early in the morning?”

Jeno retrieved his hand from the door knob and turned to face the woman who was standing across him, tapping her shoe onto the carpeted floor impatiently, and one hand on her hip. “School?”

“This early? I believed your class starts at 8? Go back to sleep young man,” her tone held a certain air of authority but still sounded somewhat sweet to his ears.

“I can’t. You woke guys woke me with that old car. How come you still have that? And besides, I’ll be late for school if I sleep again _Mom_ ,” he explained.

“Your dad’s to be blamed for that,” the older tsked. “He said he wanted to go back to the good old times, that’s why he told Mr. Lim to fetch us from the airport with that noisy car.”

_Good old times, eh? If that was even possible._

“But why leave at this hour?” she continued on, the sound her heels made echoing through the walls with every step she took closer to him. “At least leave when your dad’s already awake. He dozed off but he’ll wake up in a bit. He really wants to see you,” her voice was firm and insistent as she reached for him but traces of sadness and remorse caught Jeno’s ear and it made him mortified. Allowing the older to ruffle his hair a bit, he leaned in forward and trapped her between his arms since he was now just as tall as she was and embraced her tightly but careful enough not to hurt her.

“Okay, I’ll stay a little bit more since I haven’t had breakfast yet. Can you cook something for me, mom?”

His mom hadn’t expected the sudden act of affection Jeno had just shown. She was shocked at first, was stiff but gradually relaxed after a few seconds, caressed her son’s head lovingly. Since when was the last time Jeno was like this to her? It’s been so long. “Of course honey,” she paused for a little while, then added with longing on her voice, “I miss you baby.” This made Jeno smile and he felt warm.

“I miss you too mom,” he mumbled. _Please stay._

His mother shifted slightly, Jeno released her from his hold, and the older woman smiled brightly at him when she stared at him, admiring her son’s features. _He’s just as handsome as his father._ She took him by the wrist and pulled him along the kitchen. “Come now, I’m sure you’re hungry.”

As his mom cooks, Jeno silently watches from the counter behind her, admiring her every move, amused by how happy she seems as she took up some utensils in the cupboard, clearly forgetting that they have a personal chef in the house to do those things but Jeno doesn’t complain.

Who could blame him?  He had seen neither his mom nor his dad for almost four months now and they’re rarely home so he really does miss them. Seeing his mom keeping herself busy and servicing him made him happy as well.

His mom was beautiful, she moved with grace as she prepared a simple meal for the young boy. She was detailed and very meticulous that she would even wash the plates again even though Jeno was sure the maids had washed it beforehand. The warm smile his mom gave him when she turned slightly to see what he was doing put him at ease.

Dad was lucky, Jeno thought. If only he hadn’t pushed his luck then everything would have stayed the same. But Jeno knew better than to blame his father. Not when his mother was just as worse.

He listened and laughed to her every story, how her work was, how China was, how she had been in the months that she’s been away, he made no comment, just listened and provided a reaction when necessary so that she wouldn’t see right through him. When he was able to finally taste his mom’s cooking once again, he didn’t think twice to compliment it. He never misses a chance to do so ‘cause sooner or later, he’s sure that he won’t be able to do something like that again. But seeing her, being with her for a few moments could suffice. It was enough; he could never want anything more.

“Hmm, what smells so delicious?” asked a man who looks like he just got out of bed, hair skewed, pointing at different directions, pajamas slightly crinkled. Jeno chuckled at the sight, seeing his dad not being prim and proper was unusual and somehow he found it funny.

The older made his way towards them at the table; Jeno followed him with his eyes as he neared. He was the exact carbon copy of Jeno, only older. He had natural dark brown hair, pointy nose, prominent and full lips, body well-built despite his age and was a tad taller than Jeno was. Many people would say that he got his mother’s eyes but Jeno very much looks like his dad, he was just as handsome and as attractive.

“Welcome back _Dad_. Take a sit and eat. Mom outdid herself for today.” Jeno said before he took another bite of his meal, seeing as the older sat in front of him.

At the mention of food, the elder’s eyes lit up in an instant. “Waah! That looks so delicious!” his dad exclaimed, admiring the dish prepared.

“Eat up then,” his mom then chuckled, handing him a spare plate. “I cooked plenty enough for the two of you.”

Jeno just continued on eating. His dad sighed which made him look at the man with curiosity.

“Somehow we look like a perfect family,” was what he said.

Jeno just smiled in response while his mother commented on it, barely made a joke.

He just let their words drown him and ate quietly with thoughts running wild inside his mind.

_Perfect?_

_If only._

Nevertheless, Jeno likes it this way. The way the table gets noisy whenever his parents are home, them asking Jeno how was school, his dad making cheesy jokes every now and then, and his mom laughing at them even though Jeno doesn’t know what’s funny. Although it seldom happens, it makes the household lively in every way. Well not until they leave again and Jeno will be left alone. It’s the good kind of noise, he decided.

“I’m finished,” he announced when he stood up.

“Already?” his mom asked, looking disappointed when the younger nodded his head.

 “I’ll be leaving now.”

“Bye son, take care of yourself, okay?” his dad told him, sparing him an endearing pat on the back when he reached for him, not bothering to stop the younger male.

“I’ll walk you to the door,” his mom offered which he politely declined, not wanting to burden her, knowing that she was probably tired and needed to rest.

“Oh don’t worry about me, mom. I’ll be fine.” It was brief but he saw something flicker in her eyes when he said no but his mother was quick to compose herself and shook her head, giving him a default smile which took her years trying to master.

“Okay then. Return home safe.”

The smile his mother gave him confirmed his precious assumptions and Jeno could only nod as a reply, gave his mom a soft peck on the cheek and bid goodbye to his father before he made his way outside, the staff lined up at the door to see him off.

As they closed the door behind his back, just before he left to head to the garage— his parents would never allow him to go to school without being driven by his driver— he noticed the evident change of atmosphere in their house; he always does whenever his parents are left alone and are by themselves.

The deafening silence that enveloped their home is back and it made him sick to the bone.

* * *

 

 

Omfg. I imagined Yoona and Donghae as Jeno's parents. staph TT


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cute date at the amusement park, Jaemin's scared of heights and Jeno's family issues brought to light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize if it took us so long to update. TT I have different writing projects going on (namely pentagon fics) and axidreinn has been busy so it took us a while. So yeah, this chapter marks the end of the first half of the story line. We planned on making this last for 15 chapters, so we're almost there. Lol.
> 
> Thank you for being patient with us! TT Comments are loved, of course. :)
> 
> The Dream line is having a comeback and I'm already hyped up! <3

 

* * *

 

“Oh my gosh, it’s packed,” Jaemin exclaimed in awe when he arrived at their arranged meeting place, mouth agape as he saw how many people were scattered at the front entrance of the amusement park, cheerful babble spread unto the air as they waited in cues to get inside. He was alone when he came and stood close to the gate so that his friends would immediately see him, scanning the area with excitement evident in his eyes.

“Exactly. What was Jeno-hyung even thinking, wanting to go to a crowded place when he was awkward in crowds?” said a person who snuck up behind him which startled him.

“Waah!” he shrieked with both of his hands on his chest, stumbled a few steps back, shaken by the other’s sudden presence while the latter only looked at him like a clueless child, blinked innocently through long eyelashes. “Aish! Chenle-ya, you gave me a scare!” he whined at the younger, stomped his foot childishly to the ground, not entertained by the younger’s pranks. “Geez, you should have said something. Don’t creep on me like that!”

“But I was behind your back all this time, hyung,” Chenle replied, tilted his head slightly. “It’s not my fault you can’t feel my presence.”

“Aish this kid.” Jaemin shot him a glare which made the younger chuckled lowly, amused at how the former acted.

“Hyung really haven’t changed at all,” he commented as he shook his head, “still as cranky as ever when caught off guard.”

Jaemin barely resisted the urge to roll his eyes and brush the younger aside before he suggested that they find a place to sit, complained about getting tired from standing. They casually chatted about random things as they sat by a nearby bench, patiently waiting for their friends to arrive. It was a Sunday and they’ve agreed to hang out at the amusement park a few days before. It was Jeno’s idea and Jaemin was confused why the older even suggested it in the first place, knowing Jeno’s personality.

Chenle was an energetic person, he was fully aware of that. As their conversation progressed, the way he talked and brought out topics to discuss on was both engaging and interesting; Jaemin enjoyed his company. Chenle might be lucifer’s spawn and was very naughty and playful, but he was a ball of sunshine nonetheless.

“So hyung, how was it?” the younger’s spontaneous question came which left him to stare at Chenle in confusion, unable to comprehend what he was talking about. “You know,” he prompted, “you, being friends with Jeno-hyung, meeting him. How was it?”

Taken aback, Jaemin was incapable of coming up with an abrupt reply, puzzled as to why the query was brought to light in the first place.

“You sound as if being friends with him is a _bad_  thing.”

“I didn’t mean it like that,” the younger defended, lips puckered into a pout. “You both didn’t know each other before, although you have the same set of friends. I find it intriguing. I find  _you_ very interesting, hyung.”

Hearing Chenle’s answer, the older embraced himself in a protective stance, and immediately scooted a few inches away to put distance between them which resulted into the younger male laughing ridiculously at him.

“You look stupid, hyung,” the latter uttered after calming down from his fit of laughter. “I’m not interested in you  _that way_ ,” he emphasized, tone rather close to mocking. “And besides I already have a boyfriend. I just find you fascinating as a person.” Chenle explained, shrugged his shoulders.

“Wait, can you say that again?”

“What? That I find you interesting as a person?” he repeated. “Is it the first time someone ever told you that, hyung?”

“Not that stupid, before that!” the older huffed.

“That I have a very adorable boyfriend whom I love just as much and will never exchange with anyone else?”

“Too much unnecessary information,” Jaemin grimaced in disinterest at the revelation. “But why is it that this is the first time I’ve heard you got a boyfriend? How come I’ve never seen him before? Who is he?”

“That’s a lot of questions, hyung,” the younger retorted. “You’re pushing your luck.”

“Just answer them,” he hissed, rolled his eyes in exasperation.

Chenle shrugged simply, began talking about his distant lover to the older naturally. There was a tinge of fondness in his voice as he spoke of him and Jaemin found it endearing. Apparently from what the younger said, they had met in China a few years back and the other goes to school here. “I’ve introduced him to the other hyungs when he came to visit last summer but you weren’t there. I don’t think Donghyuck-hyung has met him either.”

“So you’re on a long distance relationship, huh?” he asked, genuinely surprised that the other was willing to compromise in a situation of such. There had been a lot of group gatherings he and his best friend had missed in the past so it was probably inevitable. “I guess you’ve got it tough at times.”

“Yeah, He rarely comes back to hang out with us. We always talk through calls though,” Chenle answered, his expression softened as he lagged off. “I miss him almost every hour of the day. Sometimes, calling him just makes it worse. I just end up missing him more. It’s not the same when we’re far away, I’m seeking for more. That’s why whenever he visits, I never want to let him go.” The latter sighed, heavy with burden, but the undeniable trace of longing was still prominent, as if he’s recalling memories of them being together right then and there, his eyes were luminous with affection when he opened them.

Jaemin smiled in satisfaction at the sight, somehow proud of the younger. Harboring such pure and innocent feelings for another, it overwhelmed the older. Such things were possible after all. “Chenle-ah, how is it to be in love?”

Chenle didn’t answer straight away, even though he already knew what to say. Instead, he slowly turned to look at Jaemin, his eyes were curious, intently observing him, searching his eyes for a concrete reason as to where the sudden probe came from. Jaemin wasn’t sure what he saw in him when the younger opened his mouth and answered:

“Scary, but wonderful. Scary in a sense cause I get paranoid about a lot of things. I can’t help but worry and get anxious about him, myself, and the future. I end up asking vague questions like ‘Will we be together until we get old?’ ‘What if he finds a better man?’ ‘Does he still like me?’ The longing is agonizing. My mom told me once to break up with him since I couldn’t cope with us being apart at first. I get a lot more insecure towards those people around him. How can I not when he’s so amazing? I get jealous so easily,” Chenle smiled bitterly before he heaved a deep sigh, voice lacing with bits of quiet sadness and melancholy. Jaemin almost pitied him.

“But you know what’s wonderful hyung?” he paused to look at Jaemin. Seeing intense emotions reflecting on the younger’s honey hued orbs when he regarded him, the older was at a loss for words. “It’s always wonderful whenever he calls late at night although he’s tired from school, how he jokes around through the other line, telling me how his day is, how much he misses me, how beautiful I am although he hasn’t seen my face in months. And especially when we finally meet again and he immediately embraces me, how he smiles at me like I’m the most important person in his life. It’s… It’s just amazing.”

Jaemin could do nothing but stare at the younger, his tone dropped a few octaves lower as he talked about his boyfriend and it was appealing. To hear the younger say such raw yet sweet words as he spoke of the other, particularly the yearning evident on his facial expression and voice, lulled Jaemin to believe on the younger’s adoration for his lover was beyond an act and he basked in the moment. Amazed.

_Ahh, he’s grown more matured now._

And they fell into a comfortable silence almost instantly when the younger was done, as Jaemin was unsure how to add anything more after that rather personal topic. However, Chenle seemed unfazed as he pestered Jaemin on answering his previous question about meeting Jeno. “C’mon hyung, tell me. How was it?”

“Huh? Ummm, it was cool?” was his answer but the other seemed dissatisfied, demanding him to elaborate further. “But don’t ever dare tell anyone of this, okay?” he asked then bit his lower lip nervously, not wanting other people to know besides the younger what he’ll say if ever.

“Of course! It will only between me and you hyung, I promise!”

Jaemin was hesitant at first, unsure of how to convey such feelings and thoughts into words that the younger would easily understand without thinking that Jaemin has gone insane, struggling to form a coherent sentence.

But as he started speaking after gathering bits and pieces of confidence, he couldn’t stop; words rolled off his tongue naturally as he spoke about Jeno. “Rather than meeting him, getting to know him was the challenge,” he said truthfully. They haven’t been friends for so long, having just met a couple of weeks before, but as the days pass by that they’re together and he got to know who Jeno was, Jaemin can’t help but be left in awe whenever it concerned the older. Jeno was like an ancient riddle— as cheesy as it sounds— mysterious yet so tempting to be solved.

“There are times when I don’t know what he’s thinking of, the way he does things. Heck, even the way he smiles makes me confused! He’s very unreadable,” he sighed in frustration. Jeno was certainly unpredictable, beyond the norm that Jaemin was used to. Jaemin wasn’t sure if it was because of his curiosity that urged him to befriend the other, but Jeno was definitely something else; something intriguing. “I want to know more about him. The meaning behind his stares, that mysterious air he has around him. It may seem so puzzling to you but,” he paused then looked at Chenle, afraid to say what his head is screaming at him to admit, afraid to acknowledge that he had certain feelings for the older, but the younger gave him an encouraging nod, commending him to finish his statement.

“But it always makes my heart hammer against my chest.”

Jaemin was mortified about voicing out such thoughts into words but the younger only smiled upon seeing the expression on the former’s face, it was like as if he knew already and wasn’t going to ask anymore.

“They’re here,” said Chenle suddenly when three approaching figures caught his attention, jerking his head towards their direction.

Jaemin turned to where the younger was staring at and saw Mark, Donghyuck and Jeno together; chatting amongst themselves as they paced towards them, from the looks of it they haven’t noticed the both of them yet and continued talking.

There was nothing special, really, they were all wearing casual clothes since it was a Sunday and they wanted to be comfortable so that they could enjoy their trip to the amusement park. But amongst the three, Jaemin wasn’t definite why he stared at Jeno the longest, why his pulse quickened at the sight of the older in a plain black shirt, tight fitting acid washed jeans, and a pair of black converse. When Jeno met his eyes momentarily when he turned and caught a glimpse of Jaemin, the older grinned at him; his eyes were smiling too, crinkled into crescent moons that hid his dazzling hazelnut orbs that Jaemin has grown fond of lately. His heartbeat fastened and he flushed crimson red.

He timidly returned the same kind of smile Jeno gave, but it was more of a shy one, more nervous and less confident than usual.

“You’re blushing, hyung,” Chenle teased when his peripheral vision caught him red-faced.

“Oh shut it and behave yourself, Chenle,” Jaemin scolded lowly, conscious that other people could hear besides them.

The younger just ignored him and abruptly shot to his feet, met his hyungs half way; leaving behind the confused older on the earlier bench and flashed each of the newcomers a smile. Jaemin couldn’t hear what they were saying since he chose to stay glued onto his seat whilst he watched the four boys.

As they talked, he saw his best friend scowl at the youngest, probably in protest of some sort. Shortly after, Jeno chimed in and added something; his expression was stoic as he spoke. They continued on talking until the youngest waved at them and headed his way, confusing Jaemin as to where he was going while the others neared him.

“Where did that kid go?” Jaemin immediately asked, referring to Chenle, as he saw the younger’s figure disappearing rapidly from a distance.

“He needed to be somewhere, family affairs. Said it was urgent,” Mark explained briefly. “He couldn’t hang out with us.”

That’s funny, Jaemin thought. Why didn’t Chenle tell him anything while they were talking? Had he forgotten?

“Winwin-hyung couldn’t come too.” Jeno added when he went in front of Jaemin, his tone cordial and gentle, “he had something to do with Kun-hyung.” And then he suddenly leaned forward, a hand reached for him, to brush a leaf that had fallen on the younger’s hair, slim fingers caress lightly against chocolate locks. Jaemin felt a shiver run down his spine. “Did you wait long?”

The gesture made the former rattled but was quick to cover his mouth with his hand, cleared his throat to pretend he wasn’t at all affected by the small act. “I-I.. I d-didn’t.”

When he turned to evade Jeno’s eyes, he caught a glimpse of his best friend staring at him, the older was grinning mischievously, probably have seen his bizarre reaction but Donghyuck hadn’t said a word which Jaemin was thankful for.

“Now that we’re all here already, let’s all go have fun!” exclaimed Mark with his right arm held up high, popped up and excited, oblivious to the flustered state Jaemin was in.

Jaemin stood up and they went to get their tickets at the booth close to the gate. As Mark was about reach for his wallet to pay, Jeno beat him to it and gave his credit card to the teller before the oldest had any room to protest, saying it was his responsibility since he was the one who invited them to hang out. Jaemin smiled at Mark whining while Jeno chuckled at him, although the act was relatively small, Jeno was really nice.

Both Donghyuck and Jaemin’s phone started ringing simultaneously, the devices vibrating in the pockets on their jeans before they retrieved it. Their faces turned red almost at the same time upon reading the message they’ve both received from Winwin and Chenle.

_Good luck on the double date! ;)_

Was this even considered a date? Jaemin questioned. They were just friends, right? Friends that were just hanging out, right?

Donghyuck on the other hand grew thoughtful, over thinking about the simple message that their friends probably sent to rile them up.

“What’s wrong?” Mark asked with a frown as Donghyuck suddenly turned quiet as they stalked pass the entrance side by side. Ever since the younger opened his phone a few moments ago, he hadn’t talked much which was very unusual considering Donghyuck had been chattering nonstop when he picked him up at their house so they could go to the park together. “You feeling alright?”

The younger instantly snapped out of it when he heard the elder’s voice and repeatedly shook his head as a reply. As Mark was about to open his mouth to add something, the younger then turned and grabbed a hold of Jaemin’s wrist, much to the younger’s surprise, pulling him forcefully, leaving the two older males lagging a few steps behind.

Although Donghyuck had a tendency to act on pure impulse and be bipolar most of the time, Mark knew there was something wrong with him, especially when the tips of his ears were turning red and his tone sounded slightly irritated yet hesitant when he hard him talk to Jaemin. The blonde wasn’t keen on the idea of the younger not telling him anything, not disclosing his worries and troubles, but the older made no comment and just followed them.

“I’m gonna chew both of them alive tomorrow at school! I swear they’ve planned this!” Donghyuck grumbled, his best friend close by his side— telling Donghyuck to let him go and protesting about not liking being man handled— but Donghyuck paid it no mind and tugged on the sleeves of his shirt, dragged him without remorse.

Jeno and Mark quietly watched the two from behind their backs, following them closely as they made their way across the various attractions and establishments around the park. If it would have been a different circumstance, they would have looked like sophisticated and protective boyfriends, but they were almost indulged in their own world as well, the younger boys clueless as to what they were talking about.

“So why did you want to come here?” Mark asked seriously as their companions were at a safe distance from them, unable to hear their conversation. “And at an amusement park of all places.”

“Is there something wrong with that?” Jeno asked, still not sparing the older a look, busy staring at the two bickering in front of him.

“No, nothing. But it’s not like you,” was his simple reply and he shrugged. “You don’t usually like going to places like these.”

_Every time you act strange, there’s always something wrong._

Mark thought while looking at Jeno with concerned eyes. Mark wasn’t a stranger to the younger’s personal dilemmas at home. He knew the other was avoiding staying at their house by coming home late, avoiding his parents by heading out and hanging out with them. Jeno had always been quite odd but when it comes to his parents, he somehow is on edge most of the time, he looks restless and tired. And Mark wasn’t sure how to help.

“I’m fine,” he answered, trying to coax the elder’s apparent uneasiness. “I just want company, to hang out. And I guess, I wanted to spend some time with you guys.” the younger gave him a smile afterwards— so bright that Mark saw through it and pitied the younger. “I don’t want to be alone.”

Just then, the older couldn’t decipher what was out of place. It is the smile? Or the words which he had spoken?

* * *

 

 

Everyone has hidden fears, certain phobias that triggers their anxieties, fears that they are ashamed of, and well, Jaemin has a not so subtle fear of heights. He has done an excellent job at hiding it though; avoiding any possible rides that made his soul left his body the every second he got on them and suggested to try on some less scary attractions first.

Despite his paranoia, he didn’t want Jeno and Mark to find out— if it wasn’t obvious enough already— about them, making them think differently of him for being afraid of something as vague as heights, which made Donghyuck give him both worried and irritated stares every now and then. Of course Donghyuck knew, he always knew. So what happened next definitely caught Jaemin by surprise.

“Let’s go ride the Ferris wheel next!” Donghyuck announced happily, pointing at the ride with excited eyes. As quickly as Donghyuck mentioned the word 'Ferris wheel', he immediately grabbed Mark’s hand and ran off to where the line is, leaving the younger feeling betrayed as his best friend and Mark swiftly blended into the crowd.

Jaemin looked up to see how high the said ride went and it made his legs go weak, following closely behind Jeno as the latter made his way to the cue as well.

Waiting as the line got shorter and shorter was nerve wrecking for Jaemin, but taking a step inside their cart was even worse than he could have imagined, he felt dreadful.

Goodness, he felt like he was going to die.

He gripped tightly on the safety belt that was attached to his body like his life depended on it, trying to calm his nerves but it wasn’t working. He and Jeno were the only ones inside the cart since it could only accommodate two people at a time. Jeno seemed unaffected by anything so Jaemin tried to keep his cool, tried to salvage his image in the elder’s eyes.

When the cart was slowly moving up, his body jerked up, both of his hands balled into a fist, his breathing went shorter, and he can’t help but shake even if he tried to stop.

“Mommy, mommy, mommy” he whimpers into thin air as he felt their cart slowly lift higher which definitely didn’t go unnoticed by Jeno.

The younger was trembling, his hands visually shaking as he clasped them together on futile effort to steady his frantic beating heart. Jeno grew worried. Jaemin was acting weird. Jeno didn’t know what to do, but he reached to hold one of Jaemin’s clenched fist, just barely hovering above the younger’s before he grasped onto it.

“Hey, hey. What’s the problem?” he asked solemnly—afraid to scare the younger more than he already was.

Hearing the former’s words and feeling his touch, he turned to him, eyes full of fear, not knowing what to say. He should have been shocked, he should have been taken aback, but his apprehensions were hindering him of doing so.

Seeing that the younger is in the verge of tears, Jeno was a lost cause, he didn’t know what to do and how to do it to ease the younger’s agony. He was afraid, Jeno knew that much. All of a sudden, words of comfort suddenly spew out his mouth. Where they came from, he did not know.

“I’m with you, Nana. Don’t be afraid, okay? I won’t leave your side, I promise you. You’re with me and I won’t let anything happen to you. Do you hear me?”

Even though Jaemin was only hearing muffled words slipping from the other’s lips, unaware that the older had called him by his nickname instead, but seeing how worried his eyes were when they met his for a brief moment, he calmed down a little, and he relaxed, knowing that he’ll be alright with Jeno being there. But everything became worse when they’ve reached the peak, the very top of the ride.

His whole body was shaking when their cart swung back and forth, his breath hitched, the only difference from earlier was that Jaemin was crying silently now, petrified to his wit’s end as he heard several creaking noises before the chart slowly descended, gravity aiding it as it went down.

“Mommy, oh my god, I don’t wanna fall, I’m gonna fall, help me mom, help me please, I wanna get down, mommy,” he pleaded repeatedly, now with eyes closed, tears threatening to spill on the corner of his eyes.

He doesn’t care anymore if he looks like a pathetic loser, crying in front of Jeno just because he was afraid, he just can’t stop shivering, his anxiety taking over, feeling light headed as the second passed by, he felt like he was about to lose consciousness.

But he was awoken by a soft voice close by, whispering at him, “It’s okay, it’s okay. I’m here, so please stop crying. You’ll be fine. I’m with you.”

He fluttered his eyes open and was met by Jeno’s soft gaze upon his which melted his worries away bit by bit. He then became aware of how Jeno’s hands were wrapped around his just as tight; the warmth emitted from his hand helped him feel at ease. He was about to let go of the elder’s hands, feeling a wave of embarrassment wash over him, unclenching them but Jeno held them in place before he could let go, leaving him no room to retrieve them.

“I’ll be with you all along this ride, so you don’t have to worry about anything. You can hold my hand as tight you want. If you don’t wanna look below, just look at me. You’ve got nothing to be afraid of because you’re with me,” the older assured him with a firm yet soft and hushed voice, both of his thumb busily caressing the other’s hand, he had leaned slightly close to Jaemin so his lips were close to his ears.

Jaemin just kept on staring at him, the older flashed him another one of his eye heart throbbing smile and he felt his heart swell. He felt so assured upon hearing the latter’s words, he felt safe somehow. He trusted Jeno and knew he wouldn’t turn his back on his words. Why? Because Jeno was different.

“I promise, if something happens, just so you know,  _I’ll fall first before you do._

* * *

 

Jeno went home feeling slightly pleased about himself that he couldn’t stop smiling when he climbed up the stairs which led him to his room. After the Ferris wheel ride and Jaemin had seemingly calmed down, it then suddenly got dark; he offered to take the younger home but the latter turned down the offer nicely, saying his brother will pick him up at Donghyuck’s house instead. They separated when Donghyuck’s driver came to fetch the two, after a round of goodbyes. Mark and Jeno went home together, being driven by Mark’s driver, the older teased him on the way after he had sensed that Jeno was in a bright mood, probably brought about by being alone with Jaemin for a few minutes. Jeno returned the favour and teased him back, seeing Mark blushing after he mentioned about seeing the older holding Donghyuck’s hand when they got out the cart, Jeno deemed it was his victory.

He thanked his best friend when he was dropped off in front of his porch a few minutes later. Recalling the events that had occurred, he still had a small smile plastered across his face, their maids and house staff greeted him when the door was opened for him.

When he entered his room, the door being slightly ajar, he was surprised to see his mom sitting on his bed, her legs crossed, waiting for him.

“Mom? What are you doing here?” he asked, dropping his phone and wallet on the study table just by the door before he approached her.

“Now that isn’t the way to greet your mother,” she retorted as she stood up, opened her arms to give the younger a hug which he immediately did. “Manners, Lee Jeno.”

He let out a breathy chuckle at her subtle scolding and pulled back. “Good evening mom, I’m home.”

“Much better,” she smiled, patting her son’s hair lovingly before she drew him by the thick jacket that he’s wearing so they both could be sitting on the soft and fluffy bed. “I bought you some new clothes when I went shopping earlier. I already asked the maids to arrange them in your closet,” she informed, clapped her hands excitedly and beamed happily at the younger.

“Mom, you didn’t have to.” Jeno whined after thinking that there’s still about a hundred or more of his clothes that he haven’t had worn yet.

“But I want to.”

“Come on, mom, don’t be such a kid.” Sometimes Jeno can’t tell who’s older between them by the way his mother acts around him. “I do believe that you are aware that there are dozens of clothes inside that closet of mine, hundreds even.”

“I can only do this for you from time to time, can you blame me?” his mother immediately answered. It was chase, the sound of sadness in her voice and it made Jeno frown. It was her way of guilt tripping him and he didn’t like it, not when he knew he wasn’t at fault.

Jeno didn’t say anything after that, watched his mother slightly fidget, visually uncomfortable by his gazes before he shook his head and asked, “Where’s Dad by the way?”

Taken aback by how cold the younger’s voice sound when he asked, her lips curled down. Jeno seldom acts like this when around her, being the kind son he had always been and she would be lying if she said she wasn’t expecting that the younger will act like this to her one day. And now it did.

She gathered herself first, composing herself, knowing that it is improbable to show to the boy that his words affected her in any way. Jeno was a bright young man and she shouldn’t underestimate him, he was her son after all.

“He went out,” she reasoned. “He’ll be back by dinner.”

Seeing how his mother avoided looking at him when he stood up, Jeno mentally smirked in triumphed for flustering her, cathcing her off guard.

“Dear, your dad already deposited the money you’d need for next month in your account,” she suddenly added which made Jeno’s mood drop almost immediately. “I already added my share as well.”

Jeno just nodded understanding, wanting to end the topic right then and there.

“Honey, have you already given it a thought on where would you spend Christmas this year with? If you’re gonna come with me to China or spend it with your Dad in France?”

Oh how he wanted to sneer at the statement, to ridicule the proposition but decided against it and chose to keep quiet instead. He made no answer for a while. He hated talking about this, he hated it more than anything else.

“I’ll think about it.”

Insensitive, she thought. The younger wouldn’t meet her eyes, avoiding any possible eye contact. He had always been a distant child, aloof and coy.

When did he grow up like this? When did he become like this? How did he grow up to be so guarded? Was it her fault? The fruit of her selfishness that eventually led to her son’s deterioration?

The room grew silent as both didn’t know what to say after.

Jeno found his voice to speak the words he never wanted to ask, ever. “So, when are you guys going back?”

“Tomorrow. My flight’s at 6 and your father’s is at 6:30 but we’re leaving for the airport at the same time.”

Jeno nodded.

“Are you gonna see us off dear?” she looked over her son, hope blossoming in her eyes but the teenager averted her eyes yet again. She slowly stood up, to reach for him, to hold him in her arms with reservations or the feeling of guilt holding her back, like before, but the younger was quick to dodge her. “Jeno dear, I’m sorry but-”

“We’ll see,” he cut her off before he made his way towards the door and spared her another impassive glance. “Let’s have dinner, mom.”

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since My First and Last MV is out and we miss Nana so much, here's an update. Enjoy~

“I’m sorry, man, but I have plans today,” was what Mark said the next day when Jeno asked his best friend if he could stay with him until he was sure that his parents had left for the airport, hoping that the older would agree. “Teacher Kim has asked me to stay behind later. Something about the dance routine for the festival he’s been pestering me nonstop to choreograph.”

“You could just say that you’re going somewhere with Donghyuck later, I won’t get mad if you tell me the truth,” Jeno answered stoically, shrugged his shoulders and tapped his finger lightly against his wooden desk when he leaned back gradually against the chair, his eyes were fixated on the older seating beside him. No matter how much he tried, Mark was never really a talented liar, the way his lips uncharacteristically quiver as white lies spew from his lips were obvious and Jeno was irresolute on why he even bothered; Jeno was well aware that his best friend had made an agreement with Donghyuck, promising to tutor the younger in Math after class since he desperately needed to pass their next examination.

“I…” being caught red handed, Mark sighed in defeat, looking almost sorry, _almost._ “My bad, man. But I wasn’t lying though. I still have to meet with Mr. Kim later.”

Deep in his head, he was hoping that Mark would say yes, that he’ll give up the chance to be with Donghyuck to be with him. But that would be selfish. Jeno knew that Mark was a busy person, and had a ton of obligations for the school and his dance club, so he shouldn’t expect much from the older. And everything that concerned Donghyuck was a whole other story.

Mark couldn’t be there all the time for him, even if he badly needed him.

“It’s alright, I understand,” melancholy laced through his words and it made Mark frown.

“You could stay at Winwin-hyung’s place, you know,” he proposed but Jeno made a face. “Oh right, Kun-hyung might be there.”

“I don’t want to burden them,” he explained. “And Le’s got cram school later too.” The other two were nowhere to be found, probably went to the cafeteria to buy food which left the both of them by themselves in their classroom.

Mark was contemplating; fingers girthed his chin, brows furrowed in concentration, enumerating possible solutions to Jeno’s distress. Mark knew that Jeno was impassively avoiding his parents— and was doing an excellent job at it. However, the older was completely against it, especially since Jeno rarely sees his parents for they were always away, but he knew the younger has his reasons, so he decided to side with him. But Jeno really shouldn’t avoid them, Mark believed.

Running away from his problems was cowardly, and somehow childish— so unlike Jeno. Nothing good will come out from it.

Noisy chatter then spread into the room, voices coming from outside sounded near and clearer, disrupting Mark’s thoughts and turned around to face the intruders. Donghyuck and Jaemin came striding inside the room side by side, talking; and at the sight of the younger brunette with dishevelled locks and a lively demeanour, a bright idea then stuck Mark, an invisible bulb lighted above his head.

“Hey Jae, you doing anything later?” Mark asked from his seat, noting the frown on Donghyuck’s face as he hadn’t greeted him and directly went to talk to Jaemin instead.

“I don’t have plans. Why?” Jaemin was muddled by the sudden question.

“Great,” he exclaimed idly. He feels bad for doing this, for dragging Jaemin into other people’s business, but desperate situations call for desperate measures. “Can you keep Jeno company after class?” Mark was beating the bush, no remorse in his tone whatsoever. “Keep him company for a few hours?”

The younger, however, was left dumbfounded. “What?”

* * *

 

Despite his carefree nature, Jaemin overthinks too much sometimes and it’s taking its toll on him; mentally, emotionally, and physically. The memory of him crying as they rode the Ferris wheel and Jeno soothing his tears away for he was terrified was still vivid in his mind, and it haunted him to a point that he couldn’t sleep well later on that night. He sported dark circles under his eyes the next day when he went to class and hadn’t dodged insults being flung at him by his friends, Donghyuck’s mostly.

After what had happened between Jeno and him, Jaemin was feeling at edge most of the time. It was the ridiculous. He kept thinking about those warm hands wrapped around his, those slender fingers that perfectly fitted his when they intertwined, those soft and gentle words that tickled his ears when they slipped pass the elder’s lips, and he couldn’t stop thinking about a certain male in particular.

Jaemin was somehow jumpy about seeing him today, his stomach kept fluttering, and he wasn’t sure why. Even as they made their way towards the other classroom across the hall, his heart’s uneven beats were definitely prominent, and he was hoping Donghyuck wouldn’t hear it.

And as he saw Jeno when they entered, it made it even worse. Why was he acting like this though? It was strange.

Jaemin mentally tried to keep his cool as he and Donghyuck made their way towards them, the two being the only ones inside the room. He was half expecting to greet Jeno first but Mark beat him to it and asked him a rather weird question.

Taken aback by the sudden request, Jaemin frowned. “What?” he managed to croak out.

“You know, can he stay at your place like until 7?”

Not quite comprehending the situation at hand, he looked over at Jeno, supposing the other male to add something, to aid Jaemin in fully grasping what was up. But the said male only met his gaze for a second before he smiled apologetically at him.

“He needs somewhere to stay for a bit. I can’t stay with him since I have somewhere to be,” Mark added. “It’s urgent.”

He nodded unknowingly, aware that the older and his best friend were supposed to meet later as Donghyuck had told him earlier. He had been teasing Donghyuck about it all morning when he found out. But Jaemin was sceptical on why Jeno needed to be somewhere, somewhere else when he could just go home like he always does. Jaemin was starting to get nervous from all of this and thought he shouldn’t have come to the special class’ classroom at all. “What’s the catch?”

There had to be something more to this. The wish was bizarre and Mark’s ins and outs don’t justify anything, it doesn’t make any sense at all.

“Personal reasons.” Mark answered and shrugged dismissively, somewhat leaving him with no room to decline, elicited his approval. Donghyuck eyed the eldest, his forehead creased, somewhat against the idea, but also demanding an explanation from the older. Mark gave him a look when he noticed the glare, offered a small smile and a nod, suggesting that they’ll talk about it later when they’re alone. But it doesn’t change the fact that Donghyuck’s still displeased by the notion. “Could he?”

“Mark, you shouldn’t pressure him like that,” Jeno scolded lowly. “I don’t mind if-”

“No! It’s alright!” Jaemin interrupted in staccato, voice slightly too high for his liking which made the three other males look at him. “You could stay with me, have dinner at our house,” Jaemin offered, turning to the older. He wasn’t sure what had gotten over him when he said that.

It was quiet for a minute, either parties contemplating on what to add next, being careful as to not make matters worse.

“You sure?” Jeno asked gravely, not wanting to force the younger into something he didn’t want to do. Although the idea of being with Jaemin for a few hours was almost too tempting to refuse, Jeno doesn’t like to be a burden for him, for anyone else at that matter. “I don’t wanna be a bother.”

“U-uhm, I’m sure, it’s alright,” he retorted, slightly unsure, yet equally definite to aid the older. “I’ll tell my mom about it.”

Jeno’s face instantly brightened, genuinely thankful, and it made Jaemin speechless before he went to run outside, to call his mom. But the mixture of pink and red tinting his cheeks was definitely left unnoticed.

“Meeting the parents already, huh?” Donghyuck snickered when Jaemin was out of earshot, his tone teasing as he gazed at the older and gave him a smirk before he shook his head. “You’re fast, Lee Jeno. Smooth, very smooth.”

* * *

 

As soon as the school bell rang, the sound bouncing off through the walls, Jeno fixed his things in a huff and hid them sensibly inside his bag. He left the room, before saying goodbye to his friends. They gave him encouraging smiles and wished him luck— Jeno wasn’t sure what for— and went hurriedly down the hall to Jaemin’s classroom.

He arrived there just in time for the other to be heading out the door, his friends following closely behind, smiling wide as he conversed him them.

No matter how many times he has seen the younger grin freely ever since they became friends, he would never get tired at seeing him like that. There was something about Jaemin’s smiles that would make one stop, forget about everything else and just admire him quietly, basking at the spectacle. It was different, something that only Jaemin had. It was special.

“Hey,” he greeted in jovial as he made his way towards them, eyes on Jaemin.

The way Jaemin’s orbs widen at the sight of him making his way towards him, before he beamed a few seconds after, at the realization that it was Jeno, a sneer tugging on the corner of his lips, was cute in Jeno’s opinion that he couldn’t resist returning the act. “Hey.”

Jeno was often complimented for his smiles but they were nothing if compared to the younger’s. Jaemin’s smiles were just so beautiful that it appears surreal most of the time, almost fabricated and faux, but it wasn’t. His whole face would brighten by tenfolds if he did and it made him more pretty than he already was, adorable even. Everything about Jaemin was ethereal, worthy of praises.

Then a sudden cough caught their attention, unsettling the other’s train of thought, bursting this invisible bubble they had between them. “Hey Jeno,” a familiar voice said. Jeno was greeted by Donghyuck’s mischievous simper when he turned and heard a couple more of Jaemin’s friends making side comments here and there, entertained grins plastered on their faces as they eyed Jeno thoroughly.

“Wow, so it’s true then? You and Lee Jeno?” their classmate, a boy named Rocky— whom Jeno was acquainted with— said, intended for Jaemin, a sly smirk ghosting his face that could rival Donghyuck’s. “And here I thought Donghyuck was lying.”

“Donghyuck was right then,” Chan— another one of their friends— chimed in gleefully before he slung an arm around Donghyuck’s shoulder. “You should have told us, Jae. You didn’t need to hide this.”

Jeno wasn’t so sure what they were saying but it appeared to have triggered something in Jaemin, the younger punching his friends in the shoulders, the earlier mentioned let out an ‘off’ at the contact.

“Take care of Jaemin for us, Jeno,” Bin, which Jeno recognized as one of Mark’s friends from his dance club, remarked when he regarded Jeno and flashed him a smile that hid his eyes— awfully similar to Jeno’s. “We’ll come after you if you don’t. Right, Hyuck?” he prompted which made the other guys laugh while Jaemin stomped his feet onto the floor ridiculously, throwing angry replies at them.

Was that a threat? Jeno wasn’t sure, uncertain on how to respond to any of what the younger’s friends had stated, so he just simply nodded which earned another round of coos from the bunch, teasing Jaemin when he couldn’t come up with a comeback.

Jeno then heard Jaemin groaned in exasperation in the background before he hung his head low, avoiding his eyes simultaneously. The younger then offered that they should be off now, clearly wanting to escape his friends as soon as possible which Jeno gladly obliged.

Donghyuck kept on cat calling, playfully whistling at them as they made their way down the hall after a few goodbyes, Jaemin cursing under his breath as they took several paces away from the group.

Conversation dies as while they walked to the latter’s house side by side. Jeno hadn’t said anything and neither had Jaemin, they stalked forward in silence and somehow, it was strange. But Jeno hadn’t bothered to breach the issue and just let it be.

Jaemin opened the gate when they arrived and motioned the older to go in first while he closed it behind him. He held onto Jeno’s school jacket before the latter made his way towards the front door, halting him from his steps. “What’s wrong?” Jeno asked, slightly worried as to why the younger was acting this way.

“I have to warn you, my family could be a handful,” he uttered with a deep frown, his face appeared serious.

“I don’t mind,” Jeno answered truthfully. “I’m happy that your mom even allowed me to stay for a while.”

“Don’t tell me I didn’t warn you,” Jaemin sighed and headed for the door, unlocked it and went inside, Jeno closely behind him.

“Mom, I’m home!” Jaemin shouted as he slipped his shoes off and closed the wooden oak door, which the older found odd— like those things one usually sees in Japanese animes— but Jeno followed suit, left his shoes by the side and trailed behind the younger.

“Oh Jaemin,” a tall and beautiful woman came to view and greeted them by the doorway; she was wearing a plain white dress that reached till below her knees, comfy indoor slippers, her brown wavy hair tied into a neat pony tail and walked with grace. Despite her age, she was undeniably beautiful, and Jeno was entranced when she stood before them, smiling at Jaemin’s direction. Then her eyes landed on the boy beside her son, her demeanour became even livelier as her striking hazelnut hue orbs bore on Jeno. “Is this him?” sweetness ringed through her voice and it reminded Jeno of his own mother, somehow.

Jeno straightened himself up and bowed respectfully, “Nice to meet you Ma’am, I’m Lee Jeno.”

“Goodness! Such a handsome young man,” she commented then immediately caught the younger in an embrace which startled Jeno, made him stumble backwards by half a step, it was a good thing the younger managed to regain his balance before they both fell. “He’s a good catch, son.”

“Oh my gosh mom! Stop! Don’t harass him!” Surprised by his mom’s actions, Jaemin immediately removed the older away from his mother, snatching Jeno by his school jacket to escape his mother’s hold and ministrations. “That’s rude.”

“I’m sorry, I got carried away,” she chuckled sheepishly, but not quite apologetic about it since her expression told the younger otherwise.

“You should really stop doing that. You’ll scare him off!”

“Aww, my son’s being a protective boyfriend, isn’t he?” she cooed, hinted the possessive tone her own son used, placed a hand on her hips. “So, who’s the bottom one in this relationship? Is it my son?” she asked excitedly, pointed between the two before she clapped her hands together like a child, eyes glowing.

“Mom!” Jaemin’s face was beet-red, even up till the tips his ears at the inquiry, but Jeno just giggled at the sides unintentionally, which earned a glare from him. “Stop embarrassing me!”

 _Cute._ Jeno thought so.

“Mom, Nana’s right, you’ll scare the poor boy off if you keep being like that,” another voice then came not from afar. Yuta was gradually descending down the stairs, eyeing the three who were still at the doorway. “Jeno won’t come here anymore if that happens.”

“But he’s so handsome, dear. Really attractive,” the older eyes were smiling as she gazed Jeno once again, her words were without malice and full of tenderness.

“And stop it Nana, you’re overreacting.”

“I’m not!” Jaemin protested, pouting disapprovingly. “And hyung, what are you doing here? I thought you’ve got practice?”

“I skipped it today,” the older male answered nonchalantly. “Mom called me earlier, telling that you’re finally bringing your boyfriend home. And I didn’t know you even had one. So, I wanted to see him with my own eyes.” Yuta glanced over to the older boy and turned back to Jaemin, flashing him a shrewd look. “Turns out, it’s Jeno. Why am I _not_ surprised?” His connotation was questionable and Jaemin was mortified by the account.

In contrast to Jaemin’s state, Jeno wasn’t fazed by Yuta’s words at all. The latter quietly stood at the same spot and observed the brothers as they interact. The idea wasn’t as weird as the older made it sound, it wasn’t entirely peculiar, and it made Jeno thoughtful of the very possibility.

“But Jeno-ah,” Yuta added. “Why haven’t you told me you were dating my brother? Does Taeyong even know about this?”

“Cause he’s not!” Jaemin interjected in frustration, maddened. “Stop making up stories, hyung. And stop dragging other people into this!”

“Flustered, Nana?” the older provoked, amusement shone on his features at his younger brother’s reactions. “I can’t wait to tell Hansol about this,” he joked. It was rare for the other to be like this so he wasn’t going to let such an opportunity pass. It was perfect for blackmail.

“Yuta dear, stop teasing your brother,” their mother warned, coming in between the two siblings, which made Yuta raise his arms in mock surrender. “He might have his reasons for not telling us about Jeno.”

“Mom! Don’t start.” Jaemin groaned in protest. Everything was not going well for him today. “Just don’t.”

“What’s all the fuss in here?” an additional voice, unrecognizable to Jeno, then caught their ears. A tall man appeared at the vicinity, exiting from the kitchen, he was wearing an apron, loosely tied around his built body, under a white polo shirt and black slacks. He appeared to be around his 40s and he didn’t seem Korean— traces of foreign features on his face were evident and very noticeable. He was mostly likely to be Yuta’s father since the latter resembled the older so much and was most likely Japanese.

“Jaemin’s boyfriend is here,” Yuta answered which earned a glare from Jaemin but he was left unaffected. “The one mom told us earlier.”

“Will you stop that?!” Jaemin demanded, almost seething. Why were they out to embarrass him in front of Jeno? What will the older think of him now if his family is like this?

_Letting Jeno come here was a bad idea after all._

The younger’s father went from staring at his sons to glancing over at Jeno, his gaze was intimidating and it made Jeno uncomfortable, being the receipt of such stares. However, being reminded of his manners, the said male just bowed his head to the elder, and greeted him formally, never failing to flash with his infamous crescent moon-like eye smile.

After doing so, the man suddenly grabbed both of Jeno’s hand and bowed to him just the same which caught Jeno off guard, shaking the younger’s hands rigorously.

“Welcome to the family, Jeno-sshi,” he said. “Please take care of my son well. I am pleased to have you at our humble home.” He then straightened his back, his hold on Jeno’s hands was firm yet it wasn’t overpowering before he let go.

Although shocked by the action, Jeno nodded his head in stanch. “Thank you, sir.”

“Dad! What are you saying?!” Jaemin whimpered incredulously. Why was his family acting like this? They were ganging up on him. “Ugh! That’s it! I’m out of here!” Jaemin exclaimed, hands held up in the air in defeat, and went to his room while stamping his feet on the ground.

“You don’t have to be flustered about it, son. And come down right after you get changed, dinner’s ready,” his dad called after him for the younger male to hear.

“Copy that!” the younger shouted from his room, leaving the rest of them by the doorway, still glued to their places. “Don’t bother Jeno too much while I’m not there!”

“Come Jeno, have a sit for a minute while Jaemin’s in his room. Don’t worry about him, he’ll be with us in no time at all,” the older woman said with a smile when the other was gone and motioned their guest to follow her.

Jeno couldn’t contain a smile, the older guiding him through the other room and offered him something to drink when he sat comfortably on the couch while Jaemin’s dad went back to the kitchen to finish cooking their dinner; Yuta offered his assistance and followed.

Jaemin’s mom was really accommodating; she kept him company and never failed to ask him if he needed anything. And then, she went to a nearby book self, fishing a few books, photo albums from the looks of it, before she returned to Jeno’s side, eagerly wanting to show him Jaemin’s baby pictures.

Jaemin was cute as a child, Jeno thought as he scanned the pictures the other’s mother would make him observe. His smile was just as bright, cheeks full, and eyes that radiated innocence.

He wasn’t now, though, Jeno believed. Cute was not good enough to describe how the younger was.

However, Jeno was puzzled as to how Jaemin’s last name was Na while Yuta’s was Nakamoto still, when both names were pasted above the album, covered in glitters. He knew that they were half-brothers and that their parents married each other quite late, but it was still confusing. However, he thought it was rude to pry on something personal, so he hadn’t asked and continued watching the older as she happily flipped through page by page, enthusiastically telling stories about how the photo was taken. Her voice was full of fondness and adoration as she talked about his son. Jeno wouldn’t stop smiling at her when she recalled years’ worth of memories intensely like it just happened yesterday. She really loved Jaemin so much. She talked about Yuta, too, but the way she talked about Jaemin overweighs how she talked about her older son.

Jaemin went down from his room after a few more minutes, wearing casual clothes, his hair was wet— he probably took a shower— just in time when his mother was about to reach the second photo album she tucked beside her and snatched the book just before she could open it and hid it somewhere where she wouldn’t get her hands on, nagging about embarrassing him on purpose.

Jeno couldn’t help but giggle at the sight of mother and son bickering like kids.

Dinner was served shortly after, Jaemin’s father telling them to head onto the dining room so they could eat. The two’s disputed ended after that and they shot to their feet to oblige. Jeno was seating beside Jaemin when he got to the table, the younger offering the spot to his left in the first place, while Yuta was in front of him, who threw a knowing smirk at his younger brother’s way when they were situated.

Numerous sumptuous Japanese food were spread on the table, Jeno’s mouth watered at the sight.

The latter’s mother was really kind, she kept offering the younger bits and pieces of food when he reached for them. Same goes for the younger’s father. He kept asking questions and naturally included Jeno in the conversation as the evening wore on, and it was like he belonged in that family already.  It was really endearing.

However, an almost painful pang in his heart made him flinch as he saw the four of them laugh happily at an awful joke Yuta just made. It was bizarre but he suddenly misses his parents.

_Why can’t they be like that too?_

Almost instantly, he felt his phone vibrating through the pocket of his pants; he took it out and checked it from under the table, not wanting to interrupt the family as they were engrossed in talking to notice Jeno lower his head to clearly see the message.

 

 

_From: Dad_

_> > Where are you? Come home._

 

_From Mom:_

_> > Are you alright? We’re leaving in awhile. Aren’t you going to send us off?_

 

_From Mom:_

_> > We’re at the airport. You really aren’t coming?_

 

_From: Dad_

_> > We already left. Message me if anything goes wrong. Take care son._

 

_From: Mom_

_> > Honey, I’m sorry. I know we’ve been neglecting you so much but please don’t push us away. We’re trying our best. Always wear warm clothes when you go out, it’s freezing at this time of year. I’ll call you when I’ve landed. I love you. _

 

Jeno’s mood dropped at the words flashed on his phone’s screen, rereading the messages over and over again until he finally understood, until the reality that his parents had left again doomed on him, and tucked his phone back into his pockets.

_They’re gone._

As he chewed on his food, Yuta’s voice in the background wasn’t even loud enough to divert his attention elsewhere, other than the agonizing throb of his chest, the Japanese delicacy somehow tasted bitter on his tongue and it was strange since Jeno likes sushi the most. A heavy weight on his heart was distracting him, a lump on his throat formed, and it made it hard to act like nothing was wrong when he felt his eyes start to sting. But he refused to acknowledge it, and continued eating, afraid that the family in front of him, happily chatting, would take notice of the abrupt change in his attitude; the desire to impress them and make them like him was so strong that he forced himself to be okay and pushed those emotions at the deepest part of his heart.

The feeling was awful if he thought about it; it was terrible. But he knew it was coming, most likely. It wasn’t something new, it has happened numerous times in the past, so why should he still be affected by this? He was used to it, used to the pain somehow that he should be numb already. Besides, he wanted this. All his actions led up to this. Whatever he’ll do, it’ll always be the same in the end.

What was Jeno expecting anyway if he stayed anyway? That they’ll stay just for him? That they’ll change their minds and cancel their flights at the last minute? That they’ll realize that Jeno was worth it?

They didn’t before, why would they even bother now?

At the back of his mind, his conscience was screaming at him that it was his fault. Why would they even do that if he keeps avoiding them?

And he never really gave them a chance to make it up to him; to make it up for leaving him, leaving him behind when he needed them to stay the most.

Jeno turned discreet from then on till the end of the meal and Jaemin was worried as he noticed. His mother somehow caught on as well, asking him if he was alright, or if he felt sick.

He gave him a smile, also to the younger’s mother, assuring them that he was fine and that Jaemin shouldn’t worry. Convinced that the older was alright, Jaemin returned to his meal, and faced his brother when he asked something.

But as he saw Jeno frown when he brought the spoon to his mouth, the way his eyes glint from the light of the room, a certain kind of sadness in them, quite hurt, he knew something was definitely up. Something was wrong with him.

Jeno was a liar.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Took me awhile but here it is. TT I love emo Nomin

“I don’t mean to sound too nosy but what’s wrong with Jeno?”

“What do you mean?” Mark asked through furrowed eyebrows as he closed the door that lead to the rooftop behind him, not quite understanding Jaemin’s spontaneous question. The younger had texted Mark that he wanted them to meet, a few minutes after the lunch bell rang; telling him that it was urgent and Mark was quick to make up an excuse to his friends and went to meet Jaemin, not even telling Jeno about it. “What’s wrong with him?”

“He’s been acting very strange lately,” Jaemin answered, frowned deeply as he sat down on the floor, crossed his legs. “He became dull and talks less than usual and I know that something’s wrong.”

After that night, when Jeno had dinner at Jaemin’s house, the older had been acting weird, so strange and so unlike him. He was in a daze; his head was in the clouds. And when Jaemin asked him what was wrong as he led him to the gate, he just shook his head and denied the notion, said he was alright, and then left quietly after he bid goodbye. But Jaemin knew he wasn’t, the way he left, that air of dejection as Jaemin stared at the elder’s retreating back was enough as a sign of affirmation to know that something wasn’t right.

Or perhaps, Jaemin was just overacting? Maybe he was. So he decided that he would give Jeno a week, that Jeno will probably get over it by then and tell him what was wrong. But it didn’t. Instead, the older was ignoring him, brushed him aside and avoided him completely like a contagious plague.

Jaemin tried being optimistic, tried thinking on the brighter side; that Jeno was only doing that because he needed space, to think and gather his thoughts. But it had been a week and still no luck; Jeno was still avoiding him. Just him! Jeno acted normal around the others but when it came to Jaemin, it was a whole different story.

Everyone had their breaking point and Jaemin just reached his; enough was enough. Jaemin had enough.

“It’s not really my place to talk about it,” Mark said as he sat beside the younger, leaned his back casually against the wall.

“Is something going on?” Jaemin looked over the older with such a curious gaze, his fringe softly fell to his eyes. “Can I help?”

“No offence, but why do you care so much?” Mark wasn’t trying to be rude, but the look Jaemin had on his face, that sense of urgency that radiated from his orbs, demanding a response, confused the older. “Why do you even care about Jeno so much?”

Jaemin blinked once, twice, thrice, digested the question in his head before he came up with a reply.

“Because I don’t like it when he looks down like this. It’s been a week, hyung. I’m worried. And I know you are too.”

Although taken aback by how honest he sounded, Jaemin knew it was real; that he cared about Jeno, that he dreaded the thought that something awful happened to Jeno that made him act like that.

The younger’s answer was something Mark had already expected.

Mark threw a glance at Jaemin’s direction; the latter had his eyes downcast, biting down his lips, his hands were tightly clutching his slacks, visibly flustered— embarrassed probably. The way he fidget awkwardly made Mark smile in fond, but the latter cleared his throat audibly, brought a hand close to his mouth so the younger wouldn’t see.

_Jeno was lucky to have someone like Jaemin, no doubt,_ Mark thought definitely.

“I really can’t tell you. But you could always ask Jeno yourself,” the older said. “I’m sure he would.”

Jaemin shot his head back up almost too fast. “I don’t think I can,” he mumbled, too soft that Mark hadn’t almost caught.

“Why?” The lack of confidence on his tone and features made Mark frown and question the younger. That wasn’t the Jaemin he knew, Jaemin was never insecure with anything.

He opened his mouth but closed them again, stringing up words to form a coherent explanation to make his sentiments clear was a hard task. “Because…” Jaemin hesitated for a moment, debating with himself if he should tell Mark or not, remorseful at his own thoughts, afraid that the older will think indifferently of him if he knew.

“What is it Jaemin?” Mark has his gaze glued on him still, silently evaluating the younger.

“I just don’t think I can,” he admitted, choosing his words carefully, so anxious and so guarded. It hadn’t escaped Mark’s perceptive nature, of course. It made him thoughtful. The way the younger was acting, the manner of his speech, the way his uncharacteristically timid attitude showed up out of nowhere, it reminded Mark of Jeno in some odd way. His best friend was usually like that, scared and coy; it was almost the same as Jaemin.

_They’re perfect for each other._ Mark didn’t even need to convince himself.

Albeit astounded by that side of Jaemin he hadn’t encountered before, Mark thought it wasn’t fair, to both Jeno and Jaemin, to keep the younger in the dark, to not tell him anything about Jeno. But Mark had his own worries as well.

“Look, don’t take this the wrong way but Jeno’s going through a lot recently, his head is pretty messed up and it has been worrying me as well,” he started. “But I’m his best friend, I hope you understand that and what it is entitled for. I honestly think I’d be betraying his trust if I tell you anything.” He tried being as gentle and as truthful as he can so Jaemin would comprehend easily. However, there was no sugar coating it, no matter how close he and Jaemin were, and even if he was Donghyuck’s best friend, Mark’s loyalty will always be with Jeno.

Jaemin hadn’t made a comeback after the younger was done talking, he was looking at Mark intently, searching his eyes, making sure that Mark was being serious. And he was. When Jaemin’s eyes softened, his shoulders slackened and he gave the older a nod, silently telling him that he understood him entirely, Mark was grateful.

He felt relief wash over his troubled being upon voicing out his distress, letting the younger understand how conflicted he was, torn between helping Jaemin and siding with Jeno. He was Jeno’s best friend, true, but he can’t tell anyone anything about the said boy just because they wanted to. It doesn’t work like that.

“I’m thankful that you’re looking out for Jeno, Jae,” Mark said, smiling as he turned to look at afar, admiring the distance sky, radiant colorful rays that accentuated the clouds, before he continued, “he likes to act cool and be reserved but he’s actually hard headed and I can’t thank you enough for putting up with him. Seriously, thank you.”

“Well, someone has to,” Jaemin joked, making Mark chuckle. “Jeno’s a nice friend. It’s the least I could do.”

_Just a friend? I don’t think so._

“Well it’s nice to know someone else is looking out for him. But if you really want to know what’s going on, ask him. He’ll tell you if you do, knowing him, he will,” Mark asserted before the latter shot up to his feet, dusting his pants as he did.

Jaemin was confused as he watched the older walk away from him and headed towards the door, not bothering on emphasizing his statement; it left the younger curious and unsatisfied.

“Hey, hyung! What do you mean by that? What do you mean by Jeno will tell me if I ask him?” he shouted after him, urging the older to continue, but Mark only gave him a wave as a reply, hadn’t even turned around, his figure slowly disappearing as he left and closed the door with a click, leaving no room for the younger to ask any more questions to satiate his inquisitiveness.

_Seriously, what does he mean by that?_

* * *

  


 

 

It was already pass 7 o’clock in the evening when Jeno decided to go back to the classroom to fetch his bag. Although the school was almost deserted, especially the high school department, he wasn’t afraid, not at the slightest as he made his way through shadowy hallways. He had been walking around campus since dismissal, killing time, trying to calm himself, and straightening out his own diverged thoughts with much effort. He had been on edge lately, his inner demons chewing him alive, and it wasn’t fantastic.

Jeno hated it most when he acted that way, when he becomes detached, when he shuts everybody out irrationally, but it had to be done. He didn’t want to bother anyone; he didn’t want to be a nuisance; he didn’t want to hurt them like they did to him. The easiest way out was to distance himself, quite pitiful, but he’ll get over it, eventually.

Upon entering their classroom, slowing opening the door, careful not to make any noise, an unexpected guest sitting on his desk, holding onto his backpack like it was his own, had welcomed Jeno.

“Jaemin?” he asked, blinked his eyes repetitively to adjust to the murkiness of the space, wasn’t sure if it really was the younger since the room was dark and the lights were turned off. Jeno took several hesitant steps to where the figure was; the light that came from outside that passed through the windowsill was the only source that illuminated the room and when Jeno was finally near did he confirm that it really was Jaemin. The boy turned around and gave him a smile, faint shadows gracefully dancing across his beautiful face. Although it was dim, Jeno could still make out Jaemin’s gorgeous features that Jeno was fond of.

“I’ve been waiting for you,” the younger said softly, as if afraid to break something.

Although it had been awhile since Jeno was last given the chance to be alone with Jaemin like that, the scenario itself wasn’t actually appealing. After all, it was the sort of encounter Jeno wasn’t pleased to have, especially after everything that happened to him lately. Jeno wasn’t ready to face the said boy, not yet when he still hasn’t resolved his own issues; he still had a lot of things to fix before he could even muster the self-courage to talk to Jaemin again, without any reservations unlike before.

Jeno smiled back, rather forced, not like his usual ones. And Jaemin saw right through it. “What are you doing here?” Jeno asked.

The question might seem ordinary, an innocent query, but Jaemin heard it differently. It sounded bitter, somewhat irritated when it passed through Jaemin’s ears. His heart throbbed painfully— it hurt— but Jaemin wasn’t going to deny it, he knew. Jaemin knew that he wasn’t wanted by the boy; Jeno didn’t what him there.

“Mark-hyung told me you’ve gone missing again.” He decided to ignore the pang he felt and just went on with the conversation. “I can’t find you anywhere so I decided to wait for you here instead.”

Fuck his ego, fuck his pride, Jaemin threw everything out the window when he decided to wait for Jeno even when he knew that the older was obviously avoiding him on purpose. He needed to talk to Jeno, they both needed to talk about it, to patch things up, to fix whatever needed to be fixed between them. It was selfish and childish of him, but Jaemin needed the old Jeno back, and if he needed to take a few risks for it to happen, even if it was uncertain, so be it. Jaemin had tough skin after all; Jeno wasn’t the only one who was stubborn.

“You’ve been waiting for me? All this time?” Jeno was surprised even if he knew at the back of his mind that that was what the latter did, it still left him flabbergasted. “What if I didn’t come back? You would have waited for nothing.”

Jeno didn’t mean to make that question sound in the way that it did, it was purely unintentional, but Jaemin did not know that. The younger’s heart was frantically beating in his chest at the underlying meaning in Jeno’s words; it was starting to get painful each passing second.

“I just knew you would,” Jaemin managed to croak out, it almost came out muffled since he was flustered. “That you’d come back and realize that was waiting for you.”

Jeno didn’t say anything, not wanting to show that the younger’s words had an effect on him, and instead went on to fix his things, took his bag from the younger when the latter handed it to him, which only resulted to the uncomfortable stiff silence that hung heavy in the air between them.

Jaemin— who had been thinking of a way to breach the topic to Jeno first as he waited for him— cut to the chase, avoided further more stalling, “Why have you been avoiding me?”

“I haven’t,” the older replied impassively, but the way his body stiffened marginally made Jaemin think otherwise. The younger snorted.

“Stop lying,” Jaemin frankly said, bordering close to a hiss, unimpressed. If Jeno was going to lie, at least he should try a little harder. Did he honestly thought that Jaemin was gonna believe him if he was like this? The bastard. “I hate it when you do that.”

Jeno was about to open his mouth, to defend himself from the younger’s accusations, but Jaemin beat him to it. “If you think I wouldn’t notice then you’re dead wrong. I know something’s up. I asked Mark-hyung but he won’t tell me anything. So I came to talk to you.”

“It’s nothing serious.”

“If it’s not serious then why can’t you look at me in the eye anymore? Why are you forcing yourself to smile whenever I’m around, huh? Why do you look sad? Have I done something wrong? I’m sorry if I did, I had no clue and-”

“It’s not you,” Jeno cut him off. This time, he stared at Jaemin’s eyes directly, holding his ground, and returned the intense glare he had been receiving. “Really. It’s not you.”

Something in Jaemin’s chest ached when he saw how tired Jeno looked, with those bags under his eyes. It was painful to see, but he pushed that feeling aside.

“It’s not me, it’s you, right?” Jaemin cackled lightly, ran a lazy hand through his hair. “Try something better.”

What kind of cliché noon time drama was this anyway? Jaemin thought. That line has been over used too many times. What was Jeno playing at?

“You know you can tell me anything, right?” Jaemin added, but Jeno wouldn’t listen, he was already walking towards the door, planning on leaving him behind again. Jaemin immediately stood up, almost knocking down the chair as he did. “I know we haven’t been friends for that long for you to open up easily but I’ll try to understand.”

No answer.

“I know I’m immature but I could help if you need me to.”

No answer yet again.

Jaemin was desperate. “Please, just give me the chance. Please Jeno.” Jaemin’s voice was starting to crack; tears were welling in the corner of his eyes in frustration. It was pathetic. “Please…”

That particular tone Jaemin used, so frantic and broken, made Jeno stop dead on his tracks. He turned his head to the side, but not actually looking at Jaemin, his back still facing the younger. “You want to come to my house for a while? I’ll tell you everything there,” he proposed.

Jaemin felt like he accomplished something big right then and there.

* * *

  


 

 

The walk to Jeno’s home was quiet, _very quiet_. Jaemin wasn’t so sure on how he was going to survive this type of atmosphere. Sure, he was used to Jeno speaking less than he did but the whole situation was different to those. Only when they arrived at Jeno’s house, when the Lee’s butler opened the front door for them and ushered the young boys inside, did the latter said something. “Want some food or water?”

Still in a daze and at awe at how the elder’s house was, how extravagant it looked, he cluelessly shook his head, telling him he was alright, before slowly taking in the masterpiece that is the interior of the Lee household.

“Where are your parents?” Jaemin asked while they were climbing up the staircase to head onto Jeno’s room. While they were still at the living room earlier, Jaemin had caught a glimpse of several photographs on the table, a couple, which Jaemin suspected to be the elder’s parents, and a little boy, which Jaemin was certain to be Jeno.

Maybe it was the spur of the moment or his eyes were probably playing tricks on him, but he saw Jeno slightly flinch when his parents were brought up into the conversation. “They’re not here. They left,” Jeno answered with an obvious monotone.

“Where to?” Jaemin asked, genuinely curious, although aware that it might be uncomfortable for Jeno. Jaemin just wanted answers, he needed them. It was driving him insane; he can’t stand not being able to know.

“They went home. Mom left for China while Dad’s in France.”

Jaemin was confused at the statement. “But.. doesn’t that mean that …”

“Yeah, we don’t live together,” the older teen answered nonchalantly, sparing the younger a weak smile before he opened the door to his room and gestured with his arm, motioned for Jaemin to go in first.

Now Jaemin wasn’t sure what to say next when they entered the elder’s room, to lessen the tension, the air was awkward again and it was troubling. What should he do?

Jeno dropped his bag on a nearby table before he went to his bed, settled at the edge, patted the empty space on his right, prompted Jaemin to sit beside him which the latter complied. “Maybe you want to have dinner first?”

It was clearly a lousy attempt at evading the talk they were supposed to have but Jaemin wasn’t going to fall for it.

“Jeno …”

“Fine,” the older sighed, hinting the seriousness and insistence in the younger’s timbre. “Where do you want me to start?”

“Start from the beginning. I’m not in a hurry. I’m all ears,” Jaemin said, offered another encouraging smile as he took off his shoes so he could be contented with his position as he climbed on the bed. “Don’t strain yourself.”

* * *

  


 

 

Jeno heaved a few deep breaths to calm himself first, to relax his distraught thoughts, tangled up too tightly that he didn’t know what to voice out. Jaemin was prepared to just silently listen, to not make any side comments if the elder spoke, didn’t want to interrupt him in any way, wanting to hear every word he had to say. Jeno was going to bare his heart out in front of him, dropping his guard for once, be vulnerable, it was the least he could for the older in return.

It was now or never.

“I’m jealous,” Jeno confessed right away, not beating the bush. He sounded guilty when he said it, was ashamed of himself. “Of you and your family. Maybe that’s why I avoided you. When I went to your house and saw them, how you guys got along so well, it was a huge punch in the face. Seeing as though I could never have you guys have.”

Jeno rarely talked about his parents to anyone, it was a taboo topic, a subject he preferred not discussing about, never dreamed on sharing his distress about them to anyone else. Only Taeyong and Mark knew exactly how messed up Jeno’s life was. He detested it sometimes, how sorry Mark was for him, the look on Taeyong’s eyes, full of sympathy and pity, whenever he would stare deeply at Jeno. It’s repulsive and it made him sick to the bones. He doesn’t want anyone to look down on him just because of his family issues. He wasn’t weak.

His parents were never around and Jeno rarely saw them when they come back to Korea. Jeno always tried to see them less, avoided them intentionally if they ever come and visited him. He laughed mockingly at the thought. It was never a difficult chore, considering that they only come back once or twice a year. How could they stand not seeing their son for that long?

“I hate it when they act like nothing’s wrong with us and pretend that we’re still a family even though we’re not. Even if it was some kind of sick joke. I don’t feel like we are, I’ve never felt it before. I hate seeing them sometimes, I hate being reminded of something I once had and yet lost so easily.”

The atmosphere turned heavy again, the strain was over the roof, and Jeno could feel his blood boiling as he recalled those painful memories that were better left forgotten and buried.

“Mom and Dad were forced to marry each other when they were still young,” Jeno continued.

A marriage of convenience, as cliche as it sounded, it did happen. Jeno’s parents were their companies’ respective heirs so an agreement was arranged in order merge their companies together through marriage, to ensure their future and to build an empire that none could easily compete with. The plan was fool proof and flawless, no loophole whatsoever.

When both of them graduated from college, they immediately got married. It was supposed to be the wedding of the year; the internet was in a buzz. The oldest son of the Lee’s, getting married to the youngest daughter of the Lim’s, everyone was envious and excited. Everyone thought that they look good together, that they were perfect for each other. And they were— appearance wise.

“And they had me a year after they got married. My grandparents thought that since they had me, since they had a child, they would learn to get along, learn to love each other, and learn to be one happy family. For my sake,” he trailed off. “But it didn’t turn out that way.”

Jeno turned and smiled lazily for once, but guessing from the frown Jaemin gave him in return suggested that the younger didn’t liked what he saw.

It was a smile that didn’t crinkle till it reached his eyes, it was full of bitterness, it was empty, fake, and it hadn’t been able to mask his anger at all. It was dead and cold, like Jeno was inside.

“They cheated on each other for years.”

His mom was having an affair while she was still carrying Jeno, even after he was born, it continued on through the years. His dad wasn’t any better; he slept around, and fooled with anyone he met in one of his business trips. They were careful with their actions, so careful that no one found out, no one knew that their supposed to be family was already broken from the very beginning. And they were rich beyond imagination; they could buy anyone’s silence.

Although they tried keeping it away from him since he was still an innocent kid then, Jeno was bound to figure everything out when he grew up. And he did. It never took him by surprise, not then, not now.

When his father got his girlfriend pregnant, without much thought, he immediately filed for divorce. His mother was also pregnant that time; it was his boyfriend’s child. It was mutually agreed upon and Jeno felt his world crashing down on him when he realized what separation meant.

“They hated each other somehow.”

They would have, probably, Jeno wasn’t so sure. But if Jeno could remember carefully, his parents never fought, not once. They seldom talk to each other, rarely even greeted the other when they were home. Jeno would have understood if they did, if they brawled just once, if he had caught them shouting at each other or something— anything— but they didn’t, so it was more confusing. It was like as if they were hurting each other silently, wounding up the other in hushed voices, in secrets, and they were hurting Jeno quietly just the same, slowly yet painfully.

“I was still around 4 at that time so I was clueless. All I know is that I rarely see them at home.  Can’t even seem to remember their faces clearly. I was left at home with Mr. Lim, our butler. He became the parent I never felt I had.

It was bittersweet if he thought about it. When his parents failed to provide him with affection a kid like his age desperately needed, the old man was more than willing to compensate for Jeno’s well being, even if it was beyond his job description. The old man cared for Jeno more than his parent ever could, more than his parents ever will.

“I was 7 when they decided to separate for good. And when they did, they packed their bags and asked me to choose on who I’ll go with.”

“And what did you say?” Jaemin felt the need to ask.

“I said I’d stay,” Jeno answered, with much conviction that it shocked even himself. “I stayed here with Mr. Lim and the rest of our staff. They were like family to me, the closest ones I’ve got.”

He paused for a moment. Mentally evaluated himself if he was still fine with continuing. His hands were shaking; he felt light headed, but nothing too serious. Yeah, he was fine. He’ll be fine. Like he had always been.

“They never persuaded me nor begged me to change my mind. They just left.” Jeno chuckled bitterly then, less amusing and more taunting, the words rolled off his tongue with much venom that Jaemin involuntarily shuddered at the iciness intact in his assertion.

“They left me all alone like I was never their son, like I was nothing to them.”

* * *

  


 

 

“Maybe that’s what I’ll always be to them, just nothing.”

The way Jeno spoke hurt Jaemin. It hurt so badly. Those ill words he’d spew without remorse, so straightforwardly, so selfishly… and yet Jaemin could understand why he did it. Jaemin had known Jeno to be the silent type, reserved, kept most to himself, but Jeno was funny if he wanted to be, he liked joking around with Donghyuck, liked teasing Mark, and liked beaming at Jaemin, regarding him like he was the only person that mattered in the world, someone irreplaceable.  Jaemin would have never guessed that he was carrying this much emotional baggage with him all this time. Jeno was so good at hiding it, and Jaemin was insensitive for not noticing. It was tough, it should have been. The burden felt heavy, too heavy to lug all by yourself, it was too much.

“Why are you crying?”

Jeno’s voice brought him back to reality. And only then did he realize that he had his eyes shut tightly and tears were rolling down from his face.

He was?

“I..I-I don’t know…” Jaemin answered but it came out mumbled, his voice was shaky.

He hadn’t noticed he was tearing up. Had it been for awhile now? Jaemin couldn’t remember. He wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeves but they still kept coming, one after the other, dripping down his face like some sort of overflowed dam that finally broke. Jaemin should stop. It was idiotic. Jeno was the one going through a lot, feeling a lot, suffering a lot, and yet it was Jaemin who cried first. It was pathetic. “I’m .. I’m sorry.. I don’t know what’s gone into me.”

Then his breathing became uneven, his sobs turned audible, tears kept falling without his consent, and so he buried his face on the palm of his hands. It was frustrating, embarrassing as hell.

Before he could decipher what was going on, a pair of arms suddenly circled his slender frame, Jaemin was locked inside them and its strong hold. Jeno had enveloped him in an embrace, pulled him close to let Jaemin’s head lean against his chest, shocking the younger. “Jeno?” Jaemin was confused by the act, he felt his cheeks heating. He looked up, tried squirming out of it but the elder won’t bodge. Then he heard it, a small sniffle. “Are you crying?”

A quiet sob followed after that, more distinct this time.

He wasn’t imaging it.

Jeno was indeed crying.

Another snuffle passed straight through his ears and Jaemin relaxed instantly. He had somehow managed to free his other hand and let it slowly snaked on the elder’s back, sluggishly rubbed soothing circles to ease Jeno’s pain even by a bit. He allowed Jeno to stay like that for awhile, allowed him to keep holding unto Jaemin until he calmed down. If only Jaemin could take some of the elder’s burdens and make them his own, he would do it without second thoughts. Seeing Jeno like this, so wounded, so scattered, so unhappy— it was agonizing.

The elder’s hold on him suddenly loosed a few seconds later, both his hands dropped onto Jaemin’s arms and he pulled back marginally. His fringe was sticking on his forehead, and his teary eyes were glistering from the light when Jaemin caught them and it made Jeno appear like he was glowing somehow. When Jeno slowly leaned down, was just a few centimeters away from his face, Jaemin almost forgot how to breathe.

“You know, this is the first time someone has ever cried for me.” Jeno pressed his forehead against Jaemin’s, eyes glued on his, and Jaemin felt everything; their breaths tangled airily at the close proximity, their heart beating rapidly, as if threatening to escape from their chests, and their eyes… especially their eyes. A fusion of black and light chocolate hues erupted before them and it left Jaemin speechless. It was beautiful. “Thank you for caring,” Jeno whispered, so softly, so gently, and so carefully that it warmed Jaemin’s heart and ringed through his ears. Whispers weren’t supposed to be so loud right?

Having bottled everything up until now, never breaking down, continued fighting by himself— Jeno had been so stupidly strong on his own. It was amazing, remarkable and …. it made Jaemin cry again, tears gathering on the corner of his eyes. He was so proud of him. “Anything for you.”

What a sight, Jaemin was weeping like a child, while Jeno was smiling like an idiot as he observed the younger crying for him. “Thank you….”

* * *

  


 

 

After hearing Jeno’s story and after they recomposed themselves, tears now dry yet eyes still swollen and bloodshot, Jaemin felt the need to let the older boy know about him too, something personal about him that only a few people knew of. When Jaemin had managed to escape Jeno’s hold, he straightened himself so they could talk seriously again.

“I never met my dad,” he confessed, pausing to look over at Jeno to see what his reaction will be. The older was calm, hadn’t expected the sudden proclamation, tilted his head to side but nodded nevertheless, urged the younger to go on.

“He died when mom was pregnant with me,” Jaemin continued, “They went for a drive, mom was on the passenger’s seat and something went wrong. Car accident. They were rushed to the hospital, dad was severely injured but he begged the doctors before he lost consciousness to attend to mom first since she was carrying me.”

Jaemin was mindlessly playing with the bed sheets beneath him as a sort of habit, rolling the vanilla scented— which awfully reminded him of Jeno— fabric in between his fingers as the rather painful imagery flashed before him, replaying it all over again until it made him tremble in discomfort.

“Mom was saved and so was I, but dad didn’t make it. He died because of too much blood lost.” Jaemin couldn’t help but sigh as he remembered how hard his mom cried while she told him that tragic story a few years back, when she deemed that he was finally old enough to understand. Nothing pained Jaemin more than to see his mom cry, break down in front of him as she relived her haunting past. Jaemin admired her for telling him though, regardless how difficult and strenuous it was.

“Mom underwent depression after the incident. It lasted for years. She blamed herself for what happened. She was so emotionally unstable that my grandparents had to take me in since she couldn’t take care of me by herself.”

“I’m sorry,” Jeno uttered, not knowing what to say, somehow apologetic for forcing the younger into sharing his troubles when Jaemin could have possibly been sensitive about it. He knew how it felt.

Jaemin immediately shook his head and gave the older a reassuring smile, telling him that he was fine, that he was alright. “Mom met Yuta-hyung’s dad when she went to Japan for a short vacation, to heal some past wounds. The rest is history.”

“Life is messed up,” Jeno commented when Jaemin was done talking. He threw his head back, he had his eyes closed before he stared at the ceiling, and sighed heavily. It was never in Jeno’s nature to complain, but it was too much to bear. “It’s unfair, really unfair.”

“It is. But life ….it’s something you have no control over. It’s the same as falling in love. It just happens unexpectedly,” Jaemin retorted, shrugged certainly. “I don’t know what your parents were thinking, or what they were really going through, but they probably did not feel anything for each other. If they stayed together, you’d most likely suffer more compared to this. Don’t you think so?”

Jeno knew that, he knew that his parents never felt anything for each other and didn’t need to be told otherwise. But couldn’t they at least try? For once? For Jeno? For their son’s sake? Don’t they even care about him?

“I just hate it when they look at me sometimes, the glint in mom’s eyes when she sees me, knowing that I look exactly like my dad, and that they hated each other. I don’t want her to hate me. Same as dad.”

“They don’t,” the younger countered, reached a hand out and patted the elder’s shoulder. “Look, whatever they had going on, it was their fault, not yours. It was their problem and maybe, just maybe, it was that sort of problem that could never be fixed in the first place,” Jaemin paused for a bit, sparing him another smile, squeezing his shoulder endearingly. “But bottomline is, no matter what they did, they’re still your parents. They might not have loved each other, but they loved you.”

“I never wanted to cause anyone any trouble. I just wanted to know what it feels like to have your parents being there for you,” he admitted honorably. “I just want my parents to love me.”

Jaemin contemplated on the previous statement, brought a hand under his chin and answered thoughtfully, “Maybe you just think they never really tried ‘cause you never gave them the chance in the first place to prove you wrong?”

And it hit Jeno like a bullet straight right through his brain. Was it really Jeno’s fault too? Jaemin had a point, he was probably right. The truth really does hurt.

“They had made a ton of mistakes but give them the chance, Jeno. Talk to them, tell them how you feel. They’ll make it up to you if you just tried being honest.”

The older sighed deeply, in both defeat and relief this time. “Yeah. I’ll try,” he promised. “I’ll call them. I’ll do something.”

* * *

  


 

 

“You alright?” Jaemin asked softly, worried after Jeno hadn’t added anything after that. The older was just looking at him, gawking at him, and it made Jaemin conscious. He flushed at the thought of the elder’s gaze fixated on him and prayed that Jeno wouldn’t be able to notice it.

But of course, Jeno saw, saw that hint of pink ghosting the younger’s cheeks, hardly palpable but it was still there. “I am now,” he answered, smiling sincerely, reaching till his eyes. The grin was enough to take Jaemin’s breath away. When was the last time he saw Jeno smiling so freely like this? It seems so long. But it was finally back. “Thank you for listening.”

Jaemin shook his head, returning the smile, not as bright and as beautiful as Jeno’s but it could suffice. “No problem.”

“I’m glad you’re here. I needed somebody to talk to about this for awhile,” Jeno admitted. “I’m sorry for putting you through this.” Jeno apologized once again, more sincerely this time; the thought of making Jaemin go through all the trouble just because he was being childish wasn’t amusing at all. He regretted it.

“Don’t be,” Jaemin replied, reaching for one of the elder’s hand and held it. Jaemin didn’t know where he got the courage from to do something as bold as that, he just did. And for once, it felt right somehow. “It’s not your fault. It’s no one’s fault actually.”

Jeno, after seeing Jaemin smile like that, holding his hand, and hearing him say words that made him feel better, he felt light, like as if all his burdens have been lifted up from his shoulders. Jeno never thought it was even possible; he felt genuinely happy, ecstatic about the idea of talking to Mark about what happened that night, and it was all because of Jaemin. It made him giddy, and he just knew he was smiling like an idiot right now. But Jeno didn’t care. “You’re right. Thank you.” Jaemin was worth taking chances on. “Thank you for eveything.”

“You have friends, Jeno. You have Mark, us, the hyungs, we’ll always be here if you need someone to talk to.”

“They’re different, Mark’s different,” he countered, shook his head in protest. “He knows everything but we never talk about it. But I like it that way. It’s just how Mark and I are. With you ….it’s not the same. I could tell you anything easily,” he said, retrieved his hand and put it on top of Jaemin’s, giving the younger’s hand a gentle squeeze. Jaemin hadn’t expected the gesture, his eyes widened incredibly as he stared at their hands on Jeno’s lap. But just like before, it wasn’t weird. Jeno’s hand was lenient and warm; it felt just right, that his heart did a couple of flips again. But what made him woozy were the words that come out of the elder’s mouth. The way he said it, all meant for him,  lovingly and so endearing, yet wary.

And then it was as if an invisible light had lit up above his head, Mark’s previous statements flooded his mind. Not really knowing how he should react to it, he replied, “So that’s why Mark said ….”

But before he can even finish his sentence, Jeno beat him to it and uttered words that made him blush the moment he heard them. His eyes alight with a familiar emotion Jaemin did not want to acknowledge when he saw them, afraid to know what it would mean for the both of them if he did. Jeno intertwined their hands together, laced his fingers against his, clasping onto them tightly, not wanting to let go. It was overwhelming, how good Jeno’s touch felt, how possessive the gesture might have seemed; it overrode his senses.

“You’re not like the rest. You’re special, Nana.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So instead of studying for my Math and Stat exams, I finished writing this chapter 'cause my majors are stressing me out. TT

“You’ve been in a good mood lately,” Donghyuck commented blatantly, intended for Jaemin as they were on their way to the special class’ room to hang out with Mark and their gang like they had been doing for the past weeks. “It’s kind of strange.”

“Really?” Jaemin asked, not quite comprehending what the older meant precisely. “I don’t feel any different, though.”

But who was he kidding? Jaemin was evidently in a good mood and did a terrible job at concealing how he really felt. The talk he and Jeno had really done its part to lift his sour disposition; they made up and everything went back to normal. After all the emotional yet rather personal confessions they shared in the elder’s room, Jeno had resumed talking to him, like as if nothing happened between them in the first place. Jaemin was thankful that the older had managed to open up his problems and innermost worries to him even though it was difficult in Jeno’s part; at least he tried and Jaemin admired him for his courage. And somehow, Jaemin felt a surge of pride wash over his ego knowing that Jeno trusted him enough to confide such delicate troubles with him.

_He’s never like this to everyone, right?_

“You sure?” Donghyuck pried, raising a questioning brow at his best friend, completely suspicious about his drastic change. “It doesn’t seem like it.”

Jaemin might think he was oblivious but Donghyuck wasn’t _that_ blind. He knew and was well aware that Jaemin had been sulking like a child deprived from sweets just a few days ago, going on about how Jeno was avoiding him, but now he seemed totally fine, very happy even.

_What the hell happened between those two?_

“What do you mean?” Jaemin asked, nose scrunched in curiosity.

“I don’t know. You just seem _really_ different,” the older confessed, couldn’t properly explain his point but his connotation spoke of many things. “Could it possibly be because of Jeno?”

Jaemin might have reacted instantly at the mention of the name since he saw Donghyuck grin in silent triumph, like he already knew, and Jaemin was silently praying that Donghyuck hadn’t misinterpreted the whole ordeal. “Not funny, Hyuck,” Jaemin retorted when he finally managed to calm himself yet continued to struggle keeping his demeanor passive and default, especially when Donghyuck already saw right through his lousy attempt of a facade.

“What? It could be the reason,” Donghyuck insisted.

“Ha, nice try.” Jaemin thought the older would give up right there, especially when he would notice that Jaemin wasn’t going to put up a fight, but it didn’t.

And when Donghyuck was persistent about something, one would never see the end of it. He kept asserting that something was going on between him and Jeno, and that Jaemin was betraying their friendship by not telling him anything, keeping him in the dark.

But what was Jaemin supposed to say when he wasn’t so sure himself? So he did what he knew he had to do, he kept quiet. Donghyuck would get tired of annoying him eventually.

 

* * *

 

 

 

They arrived at Jeno’s classroom shortly after their small banter. Chenle and Winwin weren’t there like they had expected but Mark and Jeno were, by their seats, in the middle of a conversation. They greeted the two and both boys brought their dialogue to a stop and returned the favor to acknowledge their presence. Donghyuck made a beeline straight for Mark and the older stood up and offered his seat to the younger which surprisingly, resulted into a beet-red Lee Donghyuck. Jaemin would have been impressed if he cared or if he was even paying attention but he wasn’t, his eyes and focus were only meant for one person.

When Jeno’s eyes met his briefly, as it glistened against the sunlight that passed through the window, the older easily broke into a smile, the corners of his mouth tugged upward, and Jaemin felt satisfied somehow. The way Jeno smiled at him, without reservations, unlike before where he usually tried to mask out his sadness, was genuinely beautiful. The sight made his heart throb in his chest, almost painfully, and Jaemin was confused why it did.

They talked for a bit when Jaemin sat down, like they usually do. And then they fooled around like 8-year olds, uncaring and naive.

But a sudden bubble of emotion took Jaemin aback and left him clueless as to where it originated from.

Donghyuck had always been playful and found messing with Jeno to be quite humorous in most occasions and Jaemin thought it was just natural so he never told him off because of it. And they were just doing that; teased each other mindlessly, laughed rather audibly without much remorse as Donghyuck cracked a few jokes, but it wasn’t just that.

They were practically flirting with each other, Jaemin believed.

Jaemin didn’t mind it at first; Donghyuck was just naturally funny and fun to be with. Everyone loved him. And that’s what scared Jaemin the most.

_What if Jeno did, too?_

It hadn’t been that case, though. They were all friends; Donghyuck and him were like that most of the time as well, inseparable at some point and always at war. But what changed? Why was there an unsettling feeling sitting at the pit of his stomach as he watched Donghyuck and Jeno interact in front of him? Why did he feel agitated when he saw Jeno smile at Donghyuck the same kind of smile he used when he looked at Jaemin?

Jaemin thought he was just imagining things, that his eyes betrayed him and he was the only one who saw it, but when Jaemin turned to spare Mark a glance, visibly, the other wasn’t amused as well, exasperation clear on his face and he had his seagull-like brows furrowed as he observed the two.

_I guess I’m not the only one then._

 

* * *

 

 

 

Jeno’s phone suddenly lit up while they were in the middle of an intense dialogue about One Piece and football as the afternoon wore on. One gaze at the screen and at the number that appeared was all it took for him to look at Mark, and the older immediately understood what his gaze met.

They stood up to their feet, flattened the creases on their pants and said they had something to do for a bit and would be right back after a few minutes.

Mark had been very quiet ever since Jaemin and Donghyuck arrived at their room and Jeno somehow found it odd. The older looked like he wanted to say something, but was internally debating against it, was at a silent self-conflict. Jeno wanted to ask him what was wrong, but decided on contrary to his previous idea, and waited for Mark to tell him first instead.

And it didn’t take long before Mark breached the topic.

“Look, I’m not being dramatic or anything but you really should be careful with your actions sometimes,” Mark said as they were walking down the hallway to head outside, they were supposed to meet someone, a mutual friend of theirs that was visiting them while he was on vacation. “Especially when fooling around with Donghyuck.”

The timbre in Mark’s tone was stoic, obviously impassive, but the look on the elder’s face gave him away. Jeno stared incredibly at his best friend. “Don’t tell me you’re jealous?” he asked, somewhat amused at the turn of events. “Dude, seriously?”

“I’m not,” the older male responded defensively, swiftly stuffed his hands into his pockets, before he cleared his throat; which made Jeno chuckle. Although he was trying to keep his cool, Mark looked flustered and it made him appear adorable for some peculiar reason. Mark seldom showed that side of him and it made Jeno wonder just how important Donghyuck was, and what he meant to his best friend. _Donghyuck should see this._ “But someone else could be.”

“Okay, I’m sorry if I crossed the line,” Jeno apologized right away, understanding why Mark’s air was suddenly serious. “But believe me dude, I’m just joking with him. I don’t even like him that way. I’ll try to be more careful next time,” he promised. Donghyuck was the sort of person Jeno was genuinely comfortable with, and Jeno was rarely like that to anyone, so he might have gotten carried away a bunch of times when they immaturely fooled around. However, there was never a moment where his platonic affections for his witty friend bordered pass that invisible line of friendship.

It would have seemed like his innocent actions towards the younger male was viewed negatively, seen as something done with hidden intentions attached. But Jeno doesn’t mind it at all; if he was in Mark’s position, he would most likely feel the same thing. “Don’t worry. I won’t sweep him off his feet. That’s your job.”

“You better,” Mark warned, but there wasn’t much bite into his words as he playfully nudged the younger by his shoulder, slightly made Jeno stumble on his feet. “He’s mine, man.”

“I know, and I have someone who’s mine too,” Jeno smirked in return. Both boys laughed at themselves as they managed to get out of the building.

 

* * *

 

 

 

“You know, you couldn’t be any more obvious than you already are,” Donghyuck immediately asserted when the two older boys were out of earshot as they exited the room and the maroon-haired male peered at his best friend, almost accusingly. “You look stupid doing this.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about,” Jaemin was quick to deny whatever it was the older was going to throw at him.

“Oh please, anyone with eyes could see right through you, you’re just so dumb to not notice it for yourself.”

“Notice what?” Jaemin really didn’t get where the whole conversation was leading to.

Donghyuck folded his arms smugly, and attempted to not roll his eyes at him but it was in vain. “That you like Jeno and you were jealous just now.”

Jaemin widened his eyes at the statement. “I-I don’t like him!” Shit, he stuttered.

“You don’t?”

“I-I don’t!”

“You hesitated,” Donghyuck pointed out.

“Shut up,” he barked feverishly. “I don’t, okay? Final.”

“You were never good at lying, Nana. Not then, not now,” Donghyuck snorted, indifferent as he shook his head in disapproval. “And besides, you wear your heart on your sleeves. Only a blind person could not see how your entire face softens when you look at him with heart-shaped eyes, literally. You drool when you see him.”

He does?

“I do?”

“That’s not the point,” Donghyuck waved his hand dismissively. “You like him, Nana. Admit it.”

He frowned deeply, titled his head to the side. Was he always that easy to read?

As Jaemin was about to open his mouth to retort, to come up with a comeback to counter Donghyuck’s irrational and ridiculous claims, a rather loud voice cut him off.

 

 

 

“Jenooooooooooooo!”

 

 

 

The sudden call of the latter’s name had caught both of their attention; they had their heads turned and ears opened as they searched where the source came from in every possible direction. Ultimately, the voice came from outside of the window. They approached the windowsill, the closest one to Jeno’s desk and peeped through it. There they saw Jeno being enveloped in a tight embrace by a boy that came rushing to where the former was standing on, Mark was laughing as he watched the two and Jaemin swore he had never seen that unfamiliar guy before in his life.

“I’ve missed you, Jeno-ah,” the redhead said, loud enough for Jaemin to hear even from the third floor.

The lock lasted for a few seconds more, not that Jaemin was counting or anything.

“Feeling sour, aren’t you?” Donghyuck snorted, sensing the gloom aura looming above Jaemin as he stared intently at the pair, and saw the way his best friend balled his knuckles into a tight fist when he perceived that Jeno lifted the stranger and spun him around while he was still in his arms; the other squeaked in shock at sudden act, which caused the two to engage in a laughing fit when Jeno declined the other’s request to put him down. It looked like one of those romantic scenes in a very well-known drama series, and Jaemin hated it. Jeno looked so happy being with that guy that it irked Jaemin.

“Shut up,” he hissed as he turned his heel and took several strides away from the window, to evade his sight from the display which caused his chest to contract in faint ache.

“Don’t tell me you’re jealous again?”

“I told you I’m not jealous!” Jaemin snapped at his best friend in vexation, arms held up in the air to exaggerate his point. “How many times do I have to tell you that?!”

But Donghyuck wasn’t fazed at all, wasn’t convinced at the slightest. “Who are you trying to fool? C’mon Nana, you’ll lose nothing if you’d just be honest for once.” He frowned, a disappointed look on his face.

“You know what, you’re talking gibberish.” Jaemin had enough of Donghyuck and his accusations already. “Just drop it already. I don’t like him. And I’m not jealous!”

Jaemin was having a good day earlier, he really was, and he didn’t want it to be ruined just because Donghyuck couldn’t keep his thoughts and opinions to himself without pestering Jaemin nonstop. And besides, Donghyuck was wrong.

Jaemin _wasn’t_ jealous, he’ll _never_ be jealous.

 

* * *

 

 

Just like they had promised before they left, Jeno and Mark came back to their classroom after a few minutes, but now accompanied by the same boy Jaemin saw Jeno hugging just awhile ago. Jaemin could feel something toxic crawl repeatedly up and down his skin at the sight of Jeno’s arm slung comfortably around the newcomer’s shoulder.

_Today really isn’t my lucky day._

In contrast to how he was, Donghyuck seemed to be keen on meeting the mysterious stranger. Donghyuck chanced them by the door and introduced himself eagerly, but not before he gave Jaemin a smirk when he spared him a glance. Jaemin desperately wanted to punch that grin off his arrogant face.

“Hey Nana, I’d like you to meet Renjun,” Jeno motioned for him when both males approached him at the other side of the room. “Ren, this is Jaemin.”

He was pretty, really pretty, Jaemin admitted when he saw him clearly for the first time. His eyes were bright, certainly bright, as if something was sparkling within them, innocence radiated from his entire being, and he had the most adorable smile Jaemin was ever seen— second to Jeno’s, of course. Jaemin felt insecure just by looking at him up close.

_How could someone be this beautiful? It’s unfair._

But Jaemin was civilized and had manners, so even though he didn’t seem to like Renjun, he held his hand up and gave the other a rather forced friendly leer. “Nice to meet you. I’m Jaemin.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you, Jaemin,” Renjun beamed as he took his hand and accepted the handshake. His hands were warm, Jaemin noted. “Jeno was told me a lot about you. Really, _a lot._ ”

If Jaemin wasn’t so focused on deciphering the way Renjun turned back slightly to smile at Jeno so sweetly, he would have seen the blush that slowly crept its way up to Jeno’s prominent cheekbones and tinted them until it reached the tip of his ears.

But _no,_ Jaemin was too jealous to notice— not that he would admit it, of course.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sem's done so will try to finish the entire fic before the next one TT  
> P.S: I love Bin, just sayin'

Jaemin was irritated, uncharacteristically fuming and he wasn’t even certain of the exact reason as to why he was acting like that. But his face would heat up and he’d feel ridiculously pissed whenever Jeno would pamper Renjun like as if the other was extremely fragile and would break any second if Jeno didn’t take care of him. They were seated at the table across from where Jaemin chose to stay at, not wanting to disturb their untimely reunion.

It irked Jaemin; they looked like a couple, a happy one. The way Jeno spoke to Renjun was endearing, his voice would be lower, it would sound gentle and Jaemin was close to puking. And the smiles… especially Jeno’s sweet smiles that he gave away. Jaemin was used to being the only one who received that type of affection from the older and seeing as though somebody had taken his place, Jaemin did not like it. He was threatened, and he never expected to feel that way.

What does Renjun even have that Jaemin doesn’t for Jeno to treat him like that?

They were still at the special class’ room, and Jaemin had managed to close himself out from the rest of the group but they didn’t seem to mind at all. They flocked around Renjun like bees on honey and hadn’t noticed the way Jaemin talked less— Donghyuck probably had but he didn’t say a word about it, leaving Jaemin alone with his miserable thoughts.

Renjun’s line of sight caught Jaemin’s for a moment there and the other gave him a smile. Jaemin returned it with a rather forced grin. But no matter how hard he tried, he could not find it in himself to truly dislike Renjun. Sure, his impression of him wasn’t the best and although they had just met, the older male was sweet and kind. It was impossible to hate him.

Maybe that’s the reason why Jeno likes him, Jaemin thought. If that’s the case, Jaemin knew he had lost even before he bothered trying.

Chenle and Winwin arrived a few minutes later. And they were ecstatic about seeing Renjun too, Chenle most especially. He ran to the other the very second he saw a glimpse of him as he entered the room with Winwin in toll and trapped him in a tight embrace, nuzzled his head onto the elder’s neck like a cat. Winwin chuckled at the sight but approached the two slowly and ruffled Renjun’s locks with familiarity. “Glad to see you back, Injun.”

“Glad to be back, ge,” Renjun answered with a smile, circled his arms around Chenle as he freed them and patted Chenle’s back in a soothing manner.

The room turned quiet suddenly, everyone was silently watching the two Chinese males interact before them. Jaemin suddenly turned his head to the side and saw Jeno observing them with a smile on his face.

It took a while before Chenle decided to let the older male out of his hold, somewhat afraid that he’d disappear again if he did. “I thought you’d arrive much later. You gave me shock there.”

“Rebooked my ticket and took the first flight instead. I wanted to see you guys sooner.” Renjun smiled again, much brighter that time. “You most especially.”

And Jaemin had never seen Chenle that happy before in his life.

* * *

 

 

Jaemin could do nothing but stare at them the whole time. There was something about the way they mingled with each other that made Jaemin’s eyes unable to tear away from them. Chenle was holding Renjun’s hands; their right intertwined like they belonged there, swaying it back and forth while the younger was playing with the elder’s slim fingers on the left, rubbing gentle circles on his knuckles. Renjun was smiling at the younger, a soft chuckle escaped his lips at the gesture. Although he was far from where they were, Jaemin saw a noticeable tinge of adoration reflecting on the elder’s orbs as he continued conversing with the younger Chinese male.

Chenle’s melodious laugh was heard from across the room, probably caused by whatever it is the two were talking about. They seemed lost in their own world, uncaring about the rest of them.

“They look happy right?” a voice from beside him said. Jaemin turned to Mark, who also had his gaze on the two, a grin on his face as he watched, quite used to such a sight unlike how Jaemin was. “Both came from China but they met here in Seoul before Renjun moved back. They seldom see each other so they tend to be clingy when they meet. They never fail to make me and Jeno cough off rainbows whenever they do.”

Jaemin nodded his head slowly. He had thought about it for a while, he suddenly remembered a few instances where that he had heard Renjun’s name being mentioned by Taeyong and his brother before.

_No wonder his name sounded familiar._

He knew awhile back that Renjun had gone to their school, same year as they were, but then moved back to China unexpectedly. But Jaemin hadn’t met him before, only just now.

It was a pity, Jaemin thought. If they had met earlier and in a different circumstance then he was sure that he and Renjun would be good friends.

 _And if only he wasn’t trying to take Jeno away that is_.

Then suddenly, completely out of nowhere, Chenle gave the older a quick peck on his cheek when he leaned down. Renjun turned red after the younger took a step back, the reddish hue reached until his ears, his eyes wide in surprise before he hid them with his hand, clearly embarrassed.

The sound of Donghyuck cooing in the background at a flustered Renjun, Winwin chuckling happily, and a beaming Chenle, made Jaemin widen his eyes. And then it doomed on him, the sudden realization flooded his mind.

“Renjun’s Jeno cousin,” Mark said, as if he could read what was on the younger’s mind that very moment, confirming his previous thought.

And he was dating Chenle, the younger of the two thought. It was him; Renjun was the guy Chenle mentioned before when they talked at the amusement park before. Renjun was Chenle’s boyfriend.

_It made perfect sense. Why have I been so dumb not to notice it sooner?_

And Jaemin wasn’t so sure if the universe was playing games or if it was just pure coincidence but when Jaemin went to spare Jeno a glance, the older was already looking at him. His eyes were soft, softer than usual, and he was smiling. Again, that familiar smile that made Jaemin’s breath got caught at the back of his throat.

The sight made Jaemin’s heart skip a beat.

 

 

Wait.

 

 

 

Did his heart just skip a beat?

 

 

 

 

_Oh shit …. This can’t be happening._

* * *

 

 

 

“Hey, what are you spacing out about?”

Jaemin was unconsciously staring into nowhere in particular, cheek resting against one palm on his desk, a scrunched up expression on his face before a familiar voice reeled him back into reality. “Hyung..” he straightened his back and looked up at the other.

His friend, Bin, who was by the door took several purposeful strides towards him and sat on the desk just across Jaemin’s. The class ended for some time now but Jaemin seemed to be glued to his seat, not noticing that he was the only one left in their room. “You seem out of it,” he commented. “Chan wants us to play volleyball, you game? Donghyuck is already with them at the gym.”

Playing volleyball sounded tempting at first, it had been awhile since Jaemin last played the sport, but he wasn’t in the mood somehow.

“You feeling alright?” Bin probed when the other male took a while to answer. Jaemin’s attention seemed somewhere else, he was distracted.

“I’m fine,” Jaemin assured as he repeatedly shook his head.

But Bin did not believe him. Although he was cluelessly blinking his eyes, Bin was observing the younger intently and Jaemin let out an irritated groan at the gawking gaze the other had on him. “I really wanna punch you in the face right now.”

“W-why?” The sudden assertion caught Bin off guard. It wasn’t something he had expected. “What did I do?”

“You look like him, it’s irritating.”

“By him, you mean Lee Jeno, right?” Bin grinned knowingly. So that’s why Jaemin was acting strange, Bin should have known. “Well, we both are handsome.”

Jaemin should have been used to it, to Bin’s vainness since they had been friends for a long time, but he really wasn’t. Jaemin snorted, clearly unimpressed. “Asshole.” He leaned back onto his seat and folded his arms.

“Language, Na Jaemin. I’m just kidding, geez. Loosen up.” Bin chuckled, but Jaemin only rolled his eyes at him in return, not even bothering to come up with a comeback.

Although conflicted whether to ask or not, Bin heaved a breath before he finally asked, “So…. is Jeno the reason why you’re feeling down?”

The mention of the name made Jaemin’s mouth drop down into a small frown. Albeit hardly palpable, Bin noticed it before Jaemin’s expression turned passive.

“I’ll take that as a yes then,” he concluded when Jaemin did not answer. “Are you guys really together just like what Hyuck said?”

“We’re not.” Jaemin was quick to answer, maybe _too_ quickly for his own liking.

“You’re being defensive right now.”

“Hyung ..” Jaemin whined childishly, squirming on his seat, and even swaying his feet under the desk. “Stop acting like Donghyuck, it irritates me.”

“I’m not,” Bin argued. “But I’m serious though. Ever since you and Hyuck got yourselves tied up to Mark and Jeno, you rarely hang with us anymore. We rarely even see you guys after class or at lunch.”

Jaemin was ready to reply, but as he opened his mouth, no words came out. What was he even going to say in the first place? Bin was looking at him, expecting something, a rebut maybe. But Jaemin could not come up with anything to counter the elder’s accusations. He hesitantly closed his mouth again.

“I’m sorry,” Jaemin said instead, his voice sounded mumbled and he had his head downcast. Bin was right after all. And he was guilty about it, for not finding time to hang out with his other friends. He was a bastard, leaving them out like that. They probably hate him now, _great_.

“Hey, c’mon, it’s alright, man,” Bin said, reached an assuring hand to pat the younger’s shoulder. “We might not look like it, but me and the guys understand. After all, we can’t steal you away from your boyfriends even if we wanted to. But we really wish they’d stop hogging all your time.”

“I don’t know about Donghyuck and Mark-hyung, and I’m sure that Donghyuck will kill you if he heard you saying that, but me and Jeno aren’t a thing,” Jaemin clarified, a rather painful pang throbbed in his chest. “We never were.” When the statement rolled out of his tongue, it tasted bitter somehow. Was that supposed to happen?

“Really? Huh, you could have fooled us.” Bin looked genuinely shocked when he said it. “Everyone thinks you guys are dating.”

“What?”

“Haven’t you heard those rumours floating around lately? Most of the girls in our year are mourning ‘cause their so-called Prince Jeno is off the market.”

“They do?” Jaemin wasn’t aware of it, of any of it.

Bin hummed then shrugged his shoulders dismissively. “And to be perfectly honest, you guys really look good together.”

The assertion made Jaemin’s face heat up, but he tried his absolute hardest for Bin not to notice. He audibly cleared his throat to sooth the unsettling feeling he had sitting on the pit of his stomach and sat up straight. “I don’t like him in the sort of way that you think I do, hyung. I don’t _like_ Jeno.”

Yes, he didn’t like Jeno.

 

 

“I never said you did,” Bin directly pointed out.

 

 

 

Bin’s words made it more embarrassing for Jaemin. He was already confused enough as it was and Bin was making the while ordeal much more difficult. Jaemin wasn’t even sure what was happening to him lately. He can’t understand anything; what he was thinking, what he was feeling. Everything was a mess, he was a mess.

Earlier, with that incident with Chenle and Renjun, there was no excuse whatsoever to justify his emotions and actions. He came to realize, just when Jeno looked at him, that he was really jealous; first of Donghyuck, his own best friend, and then of Renjun, of Jeno’s own cousin! It was childish and stupid of him, and yet he still felt it.

Was it really normal? For someone to feel like that for a friend? Was he normal?

“W-we’re friends, hyung. J-just friends. Nothing more.” Jaemin sounded less convincing than he first thought he would be.

“You sure?” Bin abruptly stood up, staring down at the younger. “We’re not blind, Jaemin. You’re a very dense person, do you even know that? You’re quite oblivious yet you wear your heart on your sleeves for everyone to see. Anyone could read you, which makes me question why he hadn’t realized it as well.”

If it would have been a whole different situation, Jaemin would have thought it was funny, Donghyuck said the same thing to him before as Bin did. “What do you mean by that, hyung?”

“Nothing.” Bin sighed in defeat. Getting through Jaemin’s thick skull was hard. It took all of Bin’s energy and he felt tired, just not physically, though. “Hyuck and the guys might be looking for me, come join us if you feel like it.”

And just like that, Bin left a confused Jaemin to wallow in his thoughts all alone in the empty room by himself.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sad about pd101 but I still managed to finish this HOW??

Days passed by like a breeze and before anyone managed to notice, Christmas break was fast approaching, just a few more weeks away and everyone was ecstatic about the holidays.

It was a Sunday, the boys were at the mall, hanging out and shopping for some gifts like they had planned a few days prior. Since they came in with their usual pairs, they had decided to split up into two; Chenle dragged Renjun to the nearest ice cream parlor, Kun and Winwin were who knew where, Mark and Donghyuck said they had other business to take care of, and which automatically left both Jaemin and Jeno by themselves. When the others went their separate ways and it was just them, the air shared between Jeno and Jaemin became very awkward; none were saying anything and Jaemin didn’t like it one bit.

Jeno rarely talked, he knew that already, but why was it suddenly a big deal for Jaemin? What drastically changed between them? Was it because Jaemin wanted Jeno to pay more attention to him? Or was it because he had finally managed to realize his hidden affections for the other male that being left alone with Jeno was nerve wrecking and was messing with his mind? But whatever the reason was, Jaemin needed to sort them out; he can’t let Jeno know he was experiencing that sort of dilemma. He just can’t. However, the whole ordeal proved itself to be quite easier than he expected when Jeno was the first one who initiated a casual conversation, brought up a light topic they could talk about as they were discussing on where to head onto next, Jaemin was very thankful that Jeno was capable of salvaging the situation on his own.

As they walked together, Jeno eagerly told him that he finally decided to spend his holidays with his Mom in China and even managed to talk to his Dad about visiting France on the next vacation. Although shocked, his parents were ultimately happy with his decision. Jeno then asked Jaemin if the latter could accompany him to buy some gifts for his younger step-brother. The proposition made Jaemin smile and he agreed right away. Despite the obvious loath he had for his parents before, Jeno had finally warmed up to them bit by bit; it was great progress, huge progress. Jeno’s face suddenly lit up when he turned to Jaemin and thanked him with utmost sincerity, if it wasn’t for Jaemin, Jeno wouldn’t have even mustered the guts to talk to his parents at all. Jaemin felt very proud at that certain moment, he was happy that he was able to influence the older in that sort of way even though he hadn’t done anything significant.

They decided to head to the toy store to look around, searching for prospect gifts that Jeno should bring with him to China. Jeno had neither seen nor met his step-siblings before so he was kind of worried on what he should give them; although it was late, he wanted to make a good impression on them. Seeing the usual calm Jeno become indecisive about something as vague as gifts warmed Jaemin’s heart. It was cute, Jaemin thought.

But apparently, the day wasn’t going to be as smooth sailing as Jaemin first thought it would be; the rocky waters were bound to come much later. It was just ….. Jeno wasn’t dressed any differently, he was wearing the same casual clothes he’d normally wear on various occasions but he still managed to attract attention no matter the location. Wherever they went, a bunch of girls would turn their heads at their direction, eyes focused on Jeno, giggled and squealed, whispered under their breaths about how handsome he looked and surprisingly, Jaemin heard them all. It was really irritating, how Jeno was able to attract other people without even doing anything. And the worst part was that Jeno didn’t seem to mind and it annoyed Jaemin more.

How could he stand it? Being the center of it all without feeling uncomfortable?

 

 

After several minutes of looking through a bunch of video games and action figures, Jeno had finally bought the gift that he wanted. The corner of his lips curled up into an undeniable happy smile when the cashier handed him the items that he purchased after paying for them. He was like a little kid whilst holding the paper bag and Jaemin couldn’t help but let out a soft snicker.

“Jeno?” a feminine voice suddenly called from behind as Jaemin and Jeno were headed for the shop’s exit. Jeno instantly turned around, recognizing the soft voice and was greeted with a familiar face when he did. “It’s really you, Jeno-ah!”

“Noona!” Jeno said, he broke into another wide smile when the seemingly older brunette girl neared them.

 “Look at you. It feels like I haven’t seen you in a while.” The girl ruffled Jeno’s locks endearingly when she reached for him despite their obvious height difference. “You’ve become so handsome.”

Jeno chuckled. “Noona, it has only been a few months.”

“But still…”

 

Jaemin could only stare back and forth at the girl and at Jeno. The way they spoke to each other was with familiarity and there was no confounding that they indeed knew each other, were probably even close for all Jaemin was aware of.

_Who was she?_

And there it was again; that unsettling and unpleasant feeling sitting at the pit of Jaemin’s stomach at the idea of Jeno being close to some girl.

 

 

Noticing the lack of reaction from Jaemin’s side and as he if he could read the younger’s mind, “Nana, this is my cousin,” Jeno introduced, gestured for the girl in front of them. “Noona, this is Jaemin.”

 

 

“What?”

Jaemin suddenly felt relieved at the statement. _Thank goodness it was just another one of Jeno’s cousins._

“I’m Irene, nice to meet you.” She held out a hand and Jaemin took it almost instantly and gave it a friendly shake. At the proximity, the latter got the perfect chance to stare at her properly. Irene was smiling, her lashes would flutter gracefully and she looked very beautiful; probably the most beautiful girl— besides his mother— Jaemin had ever seen in his life.

“Where were you heading to, Noona?” Jeno asked.

“I was with Koeun, but she ran off somewhere,” Irene explained. “She said she saw Mark so she ran after him.”

“Really? We came with Mark.”

“Oh, that’s good,” she started. “Mind if I stay with you guys for awhile? I have a movie to catch in one hour and I have nothing to do before that.”

“Sure,” Jeno said but then pondered a bit and added, “If it’s okay with Jaemin, that is.”

“Huh? What?” Jaemin was confused when he heard his name being mentioned but Jeno was looking at him, half expecting, so he was quick to answer, “Yeah, it’s totally fine with me.”

“That settles it then. Let’s get something to eat, okay?”

* * *

 

 

 

They found a nice restaurant just close by to eat lunch at. Jeno volunteered to take their orders to the counter before he excused himself and went to the bathroom, leaving the two by themselves at the table. Irene was looking at Jaemin intently— even before Jeno left— one elbow resting on the table while her cheek was on her palm, her eyes were sparkling from that angle; mischievous and probing. Jaemin grew conscious. She was observing; watching his every move and Jaemin was afraid to make a single mistake under her watch. She was Jeno’s _cousin_ after all.

“So Jaemin, was it?” she asked suddenly. “Renjunnie has told me about you. You look exactly like how he said you’d be.”

“He did? How so?”

“Charming and very pretty,” Irene answered with a smile which made Jaemin flushed red. People rarely complimented him so it definitely caught him off guard. The reaction Irene got made her satisfied. “Yeah. He told me a lot of stuff.”

He already knew it was a bad idea but, “Like?” Jaemin dared to ask.

“Enough to know what’s going on between you and my cousin.” There was something about Irene’s tone that was off, it was slightly teasing yet intimidating and commanding at the same time. It sounded like trouble.

Jaemin cleared his throat audibly; it suddenly felt dry for some reason. “W-what do you mean?” Shit, he stuttered.

“You know exactly what I mean.” Irene was tapping her perfectly slender fingers on the table impatiently and Jaemin swore he felt time slowing down between the two of them. The whole situation was nerve wrecking. “So…” she sing song. “What are planning to do about Jeno?”

“About w-what?”

“You know, you’re pretty clueless for someone who’s easy in the eyes.” She chuckled lightly then tilted her head to the side. “About _Jeno.”_

“I-I don’t know what you’re t-talking about.”

_What am I going to do?_

“If I were you, I’d confess straight away,” she continued on, had not even bothered to listen to Jaemin’s reasons. “My cousin is the type who is oblivious to anyone’s advances unless they clearly say what they want from him. You should just tell him if you want him to know.”

“But… I-I don’t-” Jaemin wasn’t sure what to say. What was Irene even talking about? She made it sound like as if Jaemin liked Jeno, but that was absurd! Jaemin did not like Jeno. Right? “I-I ….”

Seeing Jaemin all flustered, struggling to string together a coherent sentence just to come up with an excuse, was amusing in Irene’s opinion. Jaemin was surprisingly adorable. _No wonder Jeno likes him._ “You’re just as bad as Renjun said you would be, just as emotionally constipated as Jeno.” She meant it a loving way though.

Irene was Jeno’s cousin from his father’s side while Renjun was from his mother’s; but regardless of their obvious age gap with one another, Irene adored Jeno and Renjun like they were her own younger brothers, the former most especially. Jeno had gone through a lot while growing up and Irene felt guilty for not being there for Jeno when he needed someone the most. She wanted to make up to him for it. So when Renjun suddenly brought up Jaemin in one of their many conversations together, talked about Jaemin being the reason why Jeno seemed happy lately, Irene was ecstatic about meeting him.

Jeno rarely opens up to other people except to those already close to him so seeing him smile wholeheartedly made Irene happy as well. All she wanted for Jeno was for him to be happy, without reservations.

And apparently, Jaemin made him happy. Irene was fine with it.

“Don’t worry too much, just give it a shot.” She smiled encouragingly. “You’ll never know, maybe Jeno feels the exact same way.”

Not that she could read her own cousin’s mind and heart, but she was sure to an extent that whatever romantic feelings the two boys share for one another, it wasn’t one-sided, not one bit.

* * *

 

 

 

 

“You feeling alright?” Jeno asked as they were heading to the mall’s main entrance. After dropping off Irene at the cinema, Winwin had texted them to meet up at the front door so they could head on home since it was getting pretty late and they still have a ton of school work to do for Monday.

“I’m fine,” he answered but Jaemin didn’t sound as convincing as he thought he would have.

And Jeno saw right through it. “You haven’t been talking much since Irene-noona showed up. Don’t you like her?”

“It’s not that,” Jaemin defended. “I like her. She’s pretty cool.”

Jeno hummed lowly, but not quite believing him.

“I’m fine, Jeno.” Jaemin assured, more sincerely that time. “Really. I am.”

“If you say so,” Jeno trailed off.  “I’m just worried, that’s all.”

“You are?” Jaemin quirked a brow, not expecting the sudden shower of concern.

“Hmmmm.”

It made Jaemin smile, it was sweet. “Thanks, Jeno.”

 

 

They walked in silence after that but Jaemin didn’t seem to mind the lack of usual chatter anymore, it was the comfortable kind of silence anyway. Walking beside Jeno was enough to suffice.

They arrived at their destination shortly and none of their friends were there yet so the two decided to patiently wait for them instead. Then suddenly, Jaemin saw Donghyuck from afar, he was pacing towards them with an evident scowl on his face and Jaemin found it strange. Before Jaemin had managed to greet his best friend, the other male harshly grabbed his wrist. “Sorry Jeno but I’m taking Jaemin home,” Donghyuck said as he turned to the eldest.

Jeno was stunned at the sudden proclamation, to say at least. “Why? Where’s Mark? Wasn’t he with you?”

“I don’t know,” Donghyuck was quick to answer, almost seething when the mention of the other’s name came and started pulling Jaemin along. Jaemin wouldn’t budge, shifted his weight so Donghyuck wouldn’t pull him so easily; he wasn’t going to let Donghyuck man handle him like that. But the look his best friend gave him was of desperation and pleading; they needed to leave. Right now.

Jaemin urgently turned to Jeno and gave him a glance which the latter instantly understood the meaning of and gave him a small nod, permitted them to leave as they wished.

“Hyuck!” Mark’s voice was heard just close by, the three boys instantly turned their heads to the source. Mark was jogging towards where they were—he looked just as flustered as Donghyuck was— and Jaemin saw Donghyuck visibly panicking.

“We’re leaving,” Donghyuck said under his breath and started to tug onto Jaemin.

Although it was slow, Jaemin was able to piece the situation altogether and decipher what was going on.

_Wait, was Donghyuck avoiding Mark?_

“C’mon, don’t be this unreasonable. Let’s talk about it,” Mark said when he was finally in front of them and was about to reach out and grab a hold onto Donghyuck’s shoulder but the younger was faster and was quick to swat his hand away.

“And it’s my fault, hyung? Just go back, Koeun is probably looking for you. I’m sorry for interrupting your time together,” Donghyuck answered back, leaving behind a dumb founded Mark Lee who hadn’t expected the reaction as he and Jaemin left. Jaemin couldn’t blame Mark though, he himself hadn’t expected to see his usual happy-go-lucky best friend act like that as well, in front of Mark of all people.

And Donghyuck called Mark ‘hyung’ for the first time ever; whatever they were arguing about, it had to be serious.

 

 

 

They were already at the parking lot when Donghyuck finally slowed down, his long and fast paced strides were coming to a halt; Jaemin patiently waited for him to completely calm down before he said, “wasn’t that too dramatic? I thought I was watching a drama happen in real life.”

“Fuck off,” Donghyuck hissed but it lacked his usual bite and it made Jaemin frown. Something was definitely wrong with his best friend. Donghyuck never threw half-hearted insults at him before; it was some sort of mockery.

“Okay, wanna tell me what happened or do you want me to leave you alone for a minute?” They had stopped walking by then, the grip Donghyuck had on him loosened and Jaemin easily retrieved his hand, massaging his aching wrist. With the amount of strength Donghyuck had used earlier, it was bound to bruise later on.

Donghyuck hadn’t answered immediately and Jaemin let him be, allowed him to take his time. “It’s Mark,” he finally said.

“Why? What did he do?”

“I hate him.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow ... idk what I should think after writing this. Lol. Enjoy though!

 

“Here.” Jaemin had just gotten back from the kitchen after rampaging through their fridge and threw a small chocolate packet at Donghyuck which the other easily caught, thanks to his amazing reflex.

 

“What’s this for?” Donghyuck asked, stared at the pack in between his fingers confusingly. It was KitKat, his favorite.

 

“Chocolate makes everything better,” Jaemin explained. “Now, stop complaining or I’m taking it back.”

 

After that rather strange fiasco at the mall, the two decided to head on home, to Jaemin’s house more precisely. Since Donghyuck was still feeling quite down while on the way, Jaemin, being the kind best friend that he was, offered to let Donghyuck spend the night at Jaemin’s to keep him company, until his boiling rage simmered down and was controllable again. Donghyuck had already called his mom and asked permission, Jaemin even did the liberty of letting the older borrow his clothes for the evening so he could get changed. They were just waiting to be called down for dinner; Jaemin’s mom was still in the middle of cooking up something for them.

 

“So, care to tell me what _really_ happened?” Jaemin sat on his bed, cross legged. He figured that Donghyuck was finally ready to open up so he asked. Besides Donghyuck mentioning Mark’s name in a fit of fury, Jaemin still had no clue what went down for the other to act up like he did.

 

But Donghyuck hadn’t answered immediately, he finished his small snack instead before he crumpled the wrapper and threw it inside Jaemin’s waste basket at the side of the room then dropped himself onto the younger’s bed. “You know Koeun, right?”

 

Jaemin tilted his head to the side thoughtfully. “Rings a bell. Sounds familiar but I can’t seem to recall the name.”

 

“You probably know her. She’s the same year as us. But she moved to a different school in the middle of our first year, went abroad probably,” Donghyuck continued. “She was really well known before she left. She was even friends with Mark’s gang.”

 

“And?”

 

“She and Mark …. well, everyone thought they were together back then.”

 

The revelation was something Jaemin hadn’t expected, not at all. He raised a questioning brow at his best friend. “And you thought so too, huh?”

 

“Well, duh. Were you even listening? They were _always_ together,” Donghyuck said, emphasizing on his words. “Who wouldn’t?”

 

“Oh right, I think I remember her now.” If Jaemin’s memory served him right then he was certain he had met that girl before if she really was a friend of Mark’s. “Wasn’t she friends with Hina, too? The pretty one?” Hina was a mutual friend of theirs, a classmate.

 

Donghyuck snorted at the term Jaemin used before he pushed himself back up to sit properly. “Yeah, that’s her. The _pretty_ one.”

 

“Okay… but what got you so worked up earlier anyway?” Jaemin dared to ask. He still didn’t get where Donghyuck was going with the conversation. “Was it because of her?”

 

Donghyuck bit his lower bit, he looked faintly anxious for some reason and Jaemin was confused as to why he was. “I don’t know, Koeun suddenly approached us at the mall earlier and Mark’s face just lit up when he saw her.” He sighed. “It was insulting … in a way. Mark never looks at me like that.”

 

“Wow Hyuck, that’s …”

 

“Petty? Yeah, I know.” Donghyuck laughed, but it was bitter, laced with venom and it made Jaemin shiver unconsciously. “Couldn’t help it though. No matter how hard I wanted to.”

 

Jaemin frowned. “So you got ….”

 

“I got jealous,” Donghyuck finished the younger’s sentence for him, sparing him the trouble.

 

“You….. got jealous?” Jaemin clarified. Oh how Jaemin wanted to laugh, he really did. But he controlled himself, not wanting to make Donghyuck even more pissed than he already was. The mere fact that his best friend honestly admitted something embarrassing was already amusing enough in Jaemin’s part. _Damn, Mark-hyung got him whipped._

 

“Hard to believe, right?” Though it stained his ego and it badly wounded his pride, Lee Donghyuck really got jealous because of some girl. “Damn that Mark Lee.”

 

“It’s alright,” Jaemin assured, even reached for the other’s shoulder and gave him an encouraging pat. “Everybody goes through that at some point.”

 

“Well, I hate it,” Donghyuck answered back, almost seething. “It’s not a very nice feeling y’know.”

 

“It never is,” Jaemin retorted. Jealousy wasn’t the sort of emotion Jaemin was foreign with after all. “But don’t you have the right to get jealous? I mean, you guys are together, right?”

 

Donghyuck turned to him almost hurriedly and gave him a weird look, like Jaemin had said something very offensive and Donghyuck was ready to smack him on the head. “Nana, we’re not dating,” Donghyuck clarified. And it took a few seconds more before Jaemin understood what he meant. “Sure, we hang around a lot and Mark takes really good care of me, and I annoy him to no end but … we never made it official.”

 

“Wow, you would have never guessed.” Jaemin snorted, very unimpressed. Donghyuck and Mark weren’t together? Like Jaemin would believe an obvious lie like that. With the way they’ve been acting, it made no sense at all.

 

“Well, same goes for you and Jeno. Everyone thinks you guys are together except for yourselves.” Donghyuck had his arms crossed idly, a challenging look on his features as he quirked a brow, provoking Jaemin, but the latter wasn’t in the mood for a fight just yet. “If that's the case, you’re just as guilty as we are then.”

 

“Leave me out of this.” As much as Jaemin wanted to prove Donghyuck wrong and defend himself, he didn’t want to talk about Jeno at the moment, not when Jaemin didn’t know what he should even talk about in the first place. Just thinking about the older male was already mentally and emotionally taxing and Jaemin had enough for the day, thankyouverymuch. “This is about you and Mark-hyung. Not about me and Jeno.”

 

Donghyuck didn’t like backing down in the middle of a possible dispute but the look Jaemin spared him was enough to say that their argument could be considered for another day. It wasn’t defeat, not yet, but he should at least cut Jaemin some slack; after all, Jaemin did a lot for him that day.

 

Then suddenly, Donghyuck gradually leaned sideways until the back of his head was resting against Jaemin’s left thigh, using it as a pillow, and he stayed there. Though Jaemin feigned disgust and annoyance and squirmed in place so Donghyuck would move, Jaemin smiled secretly. Despite their casual arguments and petty fights, he missed Donghyuck being like that; childish, arrogant as hell yet overly affectionate. The Donghyuck he grew up with was awkward with his words and made his intentions clear with his actions instead. Donghyuck was strangely comfortable with skinship. “So why aren’t you and Mark-hyung dating yet?” Jaemin was playing with Donghyuck’s hair since the latter refused to budge. “It should be about time.”

 

Donghyuck was staring at the ceiling of Jaemin’s room, admiring the uneven paint job like it was the most fascinating thing on earth while he was deep in thought, but still purred softly as Jaemin’s hand caressed his hair gently. “The idea was appealing at some point but I was contented with what we have. I never asked Mark about it ‘cause I never thought we had to, you know, be _official_.”

 

Donghyuck’s maroon locks were soft around Jaemin’s fingers, he twirled it around ridiculously and asked, “but now you want to?”

 

“Not necessarily,” Donghyuck replied. “It’s just….. I know he likes me, he has said that a bunch of times before, but it still sucks, not knowing where I really stand in his life.”

 

Jaemin hummed thoughtfully. “Okay, he likes you.” Jaemin wasn’t even surprised, Mark had been very obvious about his feelings for Donghyuck from the very beginning anyway, he was never subtle. Anyone with eyes would see how Mark was carrying a torch for Donghyuck despite the latter’s vain attempts of keeping Mark away. “But do you like him back?”

 

Donghyuck turned his head to him gradually, was staring directly at Jaemin, reading his eyes. Jaemin did the same, just not as intently as Donghyuck did. “Yeah, I do.” There was neither a trace nor hint of reluctance or hesitation in the elder’s orbs and tone and it left Jaemin awestruck. “I really do.”

 

It was Jaemin who broke eye contact first and looked away. The love and affection that radiated on Donghyuck’s face when Mark was being talked about overwhelmed him, it was too much. “That’s tough, man.”

 

“Yeah, it’s pretty complicated, no?” Donghyuck chuckled bitterly. “I don’t think I could talk to him again after the scene I did earlier. It was embarrassing.”

 

“Well, you took it over the top, but it wasn’t _that_ extreme.”

 

“I went all diva on him, in a _mall_ , with _a lot_ of people watching. It was scandalous, Nana! I should be ashamed for pulling a stunt like that! What was I even thinking?!” Donghyuck groaned in frustration, hid his face behind his hands in embarrassment. Jaemin thought it was cute.

 

“C’mon, by tomorrow or the next day, people will already forget about what you did. Trust me.”

 

“You really think so?”

 

“I know so,” Jaemin said, confident for once.

 

“So … what do you think I should do?” Donghyuck then asked, shortly after he took his hands away from his face. “About Mark, I mean.”

 

“Give it time, sort your thoughts out and talk to him after. Don’t rush yourself, if you aren’t ready to face him yet then don’t.” Jaemin shrugged his shoulders dismissively. “Regardless of whatever happens after that, I’ve got your back. Don’t worry.”

 

“Wow, for a second there, I thought you were just gonna let me to wallow in my sorrow all alone like you always do,” Donghyuck replied, sincere amusement rich in his tone. “This is a first.”

 

“Nah, what are best friends for?” Jaemin laughed lightly. He was finally feeling slightly better. “We’re pretty much stuck together for the rest of our lives anyway so I might as well be used to your crazy shenanigans. Who’ll help your sorry ass if I didn’t?”

 

Donghyuck pinched his side rather hard at the remark and Jaemin flinched at the contact. Both ended up laughing at how childish they were acting. If only they could stay like that forever, happy and unbothered by anything else, but ….. it doesn’t work like that.

 

“So .. how are you and Jeno holding up lately?” the dreaded question from Donghyuck came when they finally settled down. “You both looked quite intimate before I came in and ruined your moment together.”

 

“Again, this is not about me, Hyuck.” Jaemin sighed, for the nth time that day. No matter how hard he tried at dodging it, there was just no escape from Jeno anywhere. Not when Donghyuck insisted on dragging the other’s name in their conversation so casually. “And besides, we’re not like _that._ ”

 

“Yeah … _sure_ ….” Donghyuck didn’t sound as convinced as Jaemin hoped he’d be. “Until when are you gonna keep this up anyway? Nana, be honest with me. Do you like him? ‘Cause I’m pretty sure that he likes you.”

 

The statement made Jaemin blush; he was silently praying that Donghyuck wouldn’t notice the red tint ghosting his cheeks. “A-As if Jeno would like someone like me.”

 

“I have eyes, Nana. I’m not blind,” Donghyuck countered. “I see the way how he looks at you. You’re like the stars in his night sky and it’s sickening sometimes, no offence.” Jaemin couldn’t believe it. Donghyuck was messing up with his head again. Jeno, _the_ Lee Jeno, liked him? It was absurd. Why would he? Jaemin was practically nothing compared to him. “But the real question is….do you like him?”

 

Donghyuck was basically throwing him the same questions Jaemin threw at him earlier. Donghyuck had him cornered. But ….if he thought about it… did Jaemin really liked Jeno?

 

Jaemin pondered on the idea for a bit it, thought about what his hyungs had been saying to him for the past few weeks, what his friends did, what Donghyuck did, what Irene did, and what everyone else did. “I-I … I don’t know,” he answered so softly that it almost bordered close to a whisper but Donghyuck heard it nonetheless.

 

“You really don’t know?” Donghyuck raised a cynical brow at him.

 

Jaemin had his head downcast and was staring down at his best friend. Honestly, Jaemin was jealous of Donghyuck for some odd reason. Because despite his best friend’s rather complicated situation with Mark, at least Donghyuck was sure about his feelings for the older, at least he was certain that he liked Mark. But for Jaemin ….. he was never sure of anything before, let alone anything that involved Jeno; his feelings, his thoughts about him, and everything else in between. “Yeah, I don’t know.”

* * *

 

 

 

Jaemin let out an inaudible breath he hadn’t noticed he had been keeping in for awhile. He was at the rooftop of their school building, at the very end, resting his arms against the railings, admiring the distant sky in front of him in silence. It was rather peaceful, something he hadn’t felt once in the past few months. It was nice, Jaemin thought. Escaping all his troubles for a while, Jaemin felt unburdened and he liked it.

 

“Hey.”

 

Jaemin’s eyes widened at the sound that ringed pass his ears, it was in the area, but belonged to someone other than him. The rooftop was restricted to students so Jaemin hadn’t expected any company. And that voice— deep yet soft— Jaemin didn’t even need to turn around to confirm who it was. He knew its owner perfectly. “Jeno? How did you—”

 

“I was looking for you,” Jeno said before Jaemin even had a chance to finish his sentence. He had his hands stuffed inside the pocket of his pants and coolly made his way towards Jaemin and stood by his side. “Donghyuck said I’d find you here.”

 

_Donghyuck, that ungrateful bastard._

 

Jaemin could only curse under his breath and hum in response; he didn’t trust his mouth to utter out a reply without stuttering or embarrassing himself in front of the other male so he willed himself not to.

 

“You’re not scared?” Jeno asked, referring to the edge, they were at the 3rd floor and Jeno knew how scared Jaemin was of heights after all, had witnessed the younger breaking down infront of him after being exposed to such tall elevations. Jeno sounded worried.

 

 

 

 

“With you here, not anymore,” Jaemin answered shamelessly. Where the hell did he get the sudden surge of courage to say something like that?

 

He saw Jeno smile at the answer, genuinely. And it did things to him. Jaemin’s heart raced frantically, threatening to burst inside his chest, and his palms were sweating at the sight. They stayed silent after that, Jaemin hadn’t added anything and so did Jeno.

 

A rather strong gust of wind then came. It was cold since it was December, and the Christmas season promised nothing more than cool temperate. Jaemin huffed in annoyance but was left speechless when he turned to the other beside him. The word beautiful crossed his mind as the air tousled and uncharacteristically disarrayed Jeno’s hair before it gracefully fell on his forehead. Jeno still looked perfect though, everything about Jeno was perfect.

 

“You guys didn’t come to our room today as well,” Jeno suddenly said, breaking Jaemin’s train of thought. “What has it been like, a week?”

 

“Well ….” Jaemin was suddenly anxious, internally panicking; his mind was running a few miles per second just to come up with an acceptable excuse as to why they had been distancing their selves from their friends. Jaemin was bad liar and he knew so too. “It’s because …..”

 

“Donghyuck is still avoiding Mark,” Jeno finished his sentence for him. “Am I right?”

 

Jaemin sighed in defeat, there was no use trying to fool Jeno when the latter already knew the answer to his own question. “Kinda.”

 

“Figures.” Jeno sighed as well. The conflict with Mark and Donghyuck had been going for a while after their trip to the mall and it hadn’t cooled down since. Jeno thought they’d get over it but it was worsening by the day. Jeno pitied Mark, the latter had been stressed about the whole ordeal and it was affecting their small group as well. “But why don’t you come there anymore?” Because when Donghyuck started avoiding Mark, Jaemin did as well. “It’s lonely without you guys.”

 

“Really?” Jaemin hadn’t meant to avoid any of them intentionally. But it was hard … Donghyuck was his best friend and he promised to stick by him no matter what.

 

“Yeah. Truth is, I miss you,” Jeno confessed without remorse, just like what Jaemin did earlier. His whole demeanor brightened by tenfold when he turned to stare at Jaemin, smiling so fondly till it reached his eyes and hid them in crescent like moons. “I really do.”

 

At the other’s sweet words, Jaemin’s heart throbbed— it hurt, in the worst way possible. Jaemin was hesitant about what to reply, he opened his mouth but then closed them instead before he finally gathered his rationality and wits, and eventually asked, “Jeno, can I ask you something?”

 

“Sure, anything.” Jeno was still smiling and it was bright, bright enough to light up a whole damn city with just one grin.

 

_What is Jeno doing to me?_

 

Jaemin’s conscience was eating him up alive. There was a glint in Jeno’s eyes that made Jaemin certain that he was going to regret what he would say next. “Can you leave me alone?”

 

........

 

 

 

“What?” Jeno asked, rather unsure and skeptical. Jeno was definitely taken aback— he had to be— and disbelief was as clear as day on his face. “What do you mean by that?”

 

“I want to be alone.” Jaemin hadn’t intended it to sound as cold and dead as he did but Jaemin tried his absolute best to make it less painful for the both of them. They needed it, he needed it. “Can you just … leave? Please?” And of course, Jaemin hadn’t missed the flash of pain and that spiteful expression on Jeno’s features; it literally broke Jaemin’s heart.

 

Finally understanding the situation, “If that’s what you want, okay,” Jeno said stoically and he carefully retreated his steps, left Jaemin all alone without ever looking back as he slammed the door behind him.

 

Jaemin involuntarily quailed at the harsh sound and was already regretting what he had just said.  _What have I done?_

 


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Very short but oh well. I'm probably gonna end this in a few more chapters but .... I need more drama. Lol.

It was one cold Saturday evening. Jaemin and the gang were at Ten’s house for another small group dinner. Like the usual, they ate, played a few games and fooled around. It was fun at first, but it became awkward, _very_ awkward. Amidst Mark’s continuous attempts to get on Donghyuck’s good side, trying to corner him so that they could talk in private to make amends, everything Mark did was backfiring on him. Donghyuck avoided him like he was the plague and ignored him all throughout the night. And Jeno— he wasn’t any better.

 

Jaemin and Jeno were not talking to each other again. Jeno was casual about it, silent like he usually was and Jaemin was the one suffering more at first glance. It was torture— the worst kind. Jaemin knew that it was his fault since he was the one who practically told Jeno to stay away from him in the first place, but he could not bring himself to talk to Jeno again and apologize for what he did, for the harsh words that he said. _It was for the best,_ he thought.

 

But why did it hurt? One look at Jeno and that blank expression he had on his face pained Jaemin’s heart. All he wanted was for Jeno to be happy but—

 

Everyone caught on eventually. Donghyuck was the first to ask, Jaemin told the former everything. Donghyuck thought that Jaemin was only doing it because he was avoiding Mark but it was Jaemin’s own decision. He was pathetic, a coward; he couldn’t face Jeno, he couldn’t speak to him, he couldn’t go on like they used to, he couldn’t bring himself to accept the fact that he _might— probably_ like Jeno.

 

And of course, the other guys also noticed. The hyungs were concerned— especially Ten and Doyoung. But when they asked Winwin and Chenle what was the wrong— since Donghyuck wasn’t going to tell them anything— the two wouldn’t answer, they couldn’t; they knew they shouldn’t. They knew better than to get themselves involved with their friends’ personal banters.

 

So the evening wore on just like that and Jaemin was suddenly alone. Jeno and Mark were nowhere to be found. Donghyuck already left since it was getting late and his driver had arrived to pick him up. Jaemin was just waiting for his brother— who was missing as well— so they could head home together since Yuta brought his car. Jaemin was tired— physically and emotionally— and all he wanted was to sleep to clear his mind somehow, his thoughts were getting toxic by the second and it somewhat ticked him off.

 

“Hey, Jaemin-ah,” a voice called from behind and Jaemin turned his head marginally to face its owner.

 

“Hyung ….” Jaemin greeted the other with a familiar smile.

 

It was Taeyong.

 

 

 

 

Taeyong took a nearby chair and sat beside him, offered the younger a cup of grape juice which the latter gratefully took. They sat in silence and Jaemin grew nervous with each passing second, he clasped onto the paper cup in his clutch to keep himself sane. He knew that Taeyong was going to talk to him; Taeyong was perceptive and keen but his maternal instincts got the better of him most of the time and was nosy for his own good. “Hey, is something up between you and Jeno?” Taeyong finally asked. “Jeno seems like he’s in a bad mood and so are you. He doesn’t talk much nowadays too.”

 

“Yeah, he does so.” Jaemin gulped inaudibly, trying to clear the agonizing lump that had formed at the back of his throat.

 

“Look, I know I might be overstepping myself here but I know that something’s wrong,” Taeyong started. “I’ve known Jeno for a really long time but this is probably the most dejected I’ve seen him since his parents left and I’m very worried.” Though Taeyong liked all of his younger friends equally and showed no sign of favoritism to any of them, Jeno had always been special case for Taeyong. He was very protective of him. Jeno wasn’t weak, per say, but there was something about the latter that made him want to shield Jeno from the world itself. Taeyong’s family was close to Mark’s, thus became undeniably close to Jeno’s. Taeyong had known the boy since he could barely walk. Jeno had been through a lot of struggles in life despite his young age and the older just wanted Jeno to be happy— truly happy for once. “Tell me what’s happening. Maybe I could help?” he offered.

 

“I … I really don’t know, hyung.” Jaemin’s head was muddled; it took a lot of his strength to even form a coherent sentence to answer the older male back. “Things just got really complicated recently. It’s not his fault, though. He did nothing wrong,” Jaemin assured. Jeno never did anything wrong, if Jaemin thought about it. It was always other people hurting him, not the other way around.

 

Taeyong frowned in quiet disappointment but nodded his head nonetheless. “Okay, I understand.” There was no use trying to get the answer out of Jaemin if the younger wasn’t willing to comply. “But can you promise me something?”

 

Jaemin found himself nodding rigorously. "Anything, hyung."

 

“Please keep an eye out for him, okay? Jeno likes to pretend that he could handle himself well when in fact he couldn’t. He thinks he’s grown up already when he’s still just a kid.” Jaemin couldn’t help but smile at Taeyong as he continued blabbering on; though he sounded like he was condemning Jeno, fondness was apparent in Taeyong’s tone and face. Jaemin was happy that there were people like Mark and Taeyong that cared for Jeno like he did.

 

 _But you hurt him_ , his conscience reminded but he shook the thought away.

 

“Yeah, hyung. I promise,” Jaemin replied.

 

It was Taeyong’s turn to grin blissfully at the younger male. He ruffled Jaemin’s hair and reeled him in for a side hug. Jaemin chuckled; Taeyong rarely initiated affectionate skinship after all. “Mark has told me that Jeno opened up to you about his family. He never did that before, not even to me,” Taeyong said after a few minutes when both of them settled down and sat up straight. “You must be very special, for him to tell you everything.”

 

Jaemin flushed at the underlying statement behind the elder’s words and turned so that Taeyong wouldn’t see him beet-red. _There they go again._

 

Jaemin hadn’t made a response to the elder’s previous assertion so Taeyong decided it was best to let the matter slide. He stood up, suddenly remembered that he promised to help Taeil wash the dishes. “Don’t worry, everything will be alright eventually,” Taeyong said before he left and went inside the house, leaving the young Jaemin alone with a bittersweet smile on his face as he cast his head downward and sighed deeply.

 

_I wish it would._

* * *

 

 

 

The stars were bright, twinkling at a distance; the moon lit up the dark sky. It was beautiful. But for Jeno, it was just another ordinary night. The young lad was at Ten’s veranda at the third floor, looking above the vast, infinite expanse but couldn’t care enough to admire the stillness of the night like he usually did.

 

“What are you going out here?” Mark’s voice echoed through the area as the sliding door that led to the veranda squeaked open. “Jaehyun-hyung is looking for you right now. Let’s head on down.”

 

Jeno hadn’t turned or bat an eye at the newcomer. “I’ll stay here for a while,” he said, wary and exhausted.

 

“C’mon Jeno.” Mark’s tone was persistent. He neared Jeno and stood beside him. “Don’t be like this,” he pleaded, slightly irritated but Jeno was stubborn.

 

“I’m not in the mood, Mark,” Jeno reasoned. It sounded rather childish to his ears but Jeno wasn’t lying; he wanted to be alone. How ironic, Jeno thought bitterly. That was what Jaemin wanted as well.

 

“Well shit, Jeno, we know! Who doesn’t?!” Mark exclaimed, hands held up in the air in vexation. He finally lost all of his patience. “Everyone has their own problems, not everything is about you, okay?!”

 

Jeno was caught off guard, to say at least. He was frowning when he turned to his best friend. “Don’t talk to me like that.”

 

“Like what, huh?”

 

“Just because you and Donghyuck are in bad terms right now doesn’t mean you could be a dick about it.” It was never in Jeno’s nature to use vulgarities in a conversation so he thought it was a bad move. Jeno tried to keep his cool by breathing deeply through his nostrils but Mark made the ordeal even harder than it originally was.

 

“Yeah right,” Mark rolled his eyes at him, clearly unimpressed as he crossed his arms. “Same as you and Jaemin, then? _Please_ , you aren’t any better.”

 

Jeno knew that Mark was going through something but that did not gave Mark the right to lash out his frustrations on Jeno, not when Jeno was innocent and had anything to do with it. “You brought this onto yourself, Mark. Don’t blame us, don’t blame me.”

 

“What did you say?” Jeno only shook his head in displeasure, Mark was being irrational and he wasn’t willing to play along. “So what, you think you’re better than me now?” Mark sounded outraged and pissed. “Well, newsflash man, you are not. We will never be.”

 

“Why would I even want to be like you? When you’re this fucked up?”

 

“I dare you to say it again,” Mark hissed through gritted teeth, almost seething, invisible fumes coming out of his ears.

 

Jeno felt like a fight was going to escalate but he could care less. “Admit it, Mark. Not everything has to go your way.” Jeno’s sanity was wearing thin as Mark was suddenly all up in his face, provoking him to argue back. “If you hadn’t messed up then none of this would have happened.”

 

“And it’s my fault now?” Mark snorted in disinterest. “Blame yourself ‘cause you haven’t done anything in the first place! At least I _did_ something, what have _you_ done?”

 

“Don’t start with me,” Jeno warned, stern and serious.

 

“For pete’s sake Jeno, all do you is pine and watch! All this time! You can’t even blame Jaemin if he doesn’t like you back—”

 

And that was it; Jeno finally snapped. Like a dam, all the pent up emotions he had carefully concealed within him came crashing down and he was drenched in both rage and wrath that his eyes darkened gradually. Jeno harshly grabbed Mark by the collar of his shirt. “Shut. The. Fuck. Up.”


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was actually part of Chapter 15 but I cut it off like that since it made a perfect cliffhanger (everyone needs some drama nowadays) so this explains why this chapter is very short. The next ones will be longer though. Anw, enjoy!

 

“For pete’s sake Jeno, all do you is pine and watch! All this time! You can’t even blame Jaemin if he doesn’t like you back—”

And that was it; Jeno finally snapped. Like a dam, all the pent up emotions he had carefully concealed within him came crashing down and he was drenched in both rage and wrath that his eyes darkened gradually. Jeno harshly grabbed Mark by the collar of his shirt. “Shut. The. Fuck. Up.”

Mark jerked and stumbled back when Jeno pulled him forcefully but he regained his footing at an instant. Jeno might be pissed— but so was Mark. Jeno reeled him in, close to throwing him but Mark stood his ground. The older had his fingers curled tightly into a fist then grasped onto the younger’s tee to return the favour. “Try. Me.”

They stood face to face, not backing down from the challenge laid in front of them, grips snug around each other’s shirt. Jeno’s eyes were burning, his head was hazy and his blood was boiling in his veins. He wanted to lash out in anger, in undeniable frustration, knuckles tightly clutched, ready to strike Mark anytime, to leave a bruise or two in his best friend’s irritating smug face — but he felt something holding him back.

Though the area wasn’t the brightest, Jeno could still see undoubtedly that there was something shining through Mark’s dark orbs, the sort of emotion he could shake off if he wanted, but Jeno was well acquainted with such to not notice. Mark’s eyes were clear, with a tinge hurt and sadness. Mark was upset— they both were. And the realization doomed on him and his rationality came back. _This is pathetic,_ Jeno thought.

So with a somewhat heavy heart, Jeno loosed his grip on the other and let him go. It was not worth it, hurting Mark and himself never will be.

“I’m sorry,” Jeno said as he took a step back, gave the other his personal space and released a breath he did not knew he was holding in. “I didn’t know what got into me for a second there.”

“No, it’s my fault,” Mark said. He had finally simmered down, same as Jeno, just as apologetic as the latter.  “I’ve just been so stressed lately. I lost myself.”

Jeno’s face softened and so did Mark a few moments after— they were both assholes, hopeless bastards of their own.

 

 

They sat down on the cold tiled floor after that. Their clothed backs leaned against the metal railings, head thrown back to fully admire the stars for the first time that night. It was really beautiful, Jeno thought. He had been so caught up in Jaemin lately that he had forgot about those little things that he appreciated and made his life a gradually better even before Jaemin came in.

Both boys were quiet, Jeno wasn’t sure what to say and either was Mark. But it wasn’t awkward or strange — being around a close friend never was. Their conversations flowed naturally, not forced, and Jeno liked it that way, not wanting any of that to change between them.

“I’ve been in relationships before and you know every single one of them, but with Hyuck, it’s different— everything is. I could be myself around him without holding back,” Mark started. “I don’t have to pretend to be perfect like everyone thought I would be. He tells me stuff like how my jokes are bad as hell and I still like him for it.” There was a kind of sparkle in his eyes, the type that turned luminous because of the moon light that hit Mark’s face coincidentally. Mark  chuckled in between statements; his voice was lovingly as he freely talked about Donghyuck and Jeno thought he was being cute and adorable for once. Mark was rarely like that. “I really like him. And I know he feels the same.”

Jeno hummed knowingly. “But?”

“I could never ask him out properly,” Mark admitted with a heavy sigh. “We act like we’re together, I even feel like we are. But— I don’t know. I just don’t want to mess things up, you know how I could be.” Mark turned to Jeno and the latter frowned as he saw Mark trying his hardest to conceal the sadness on his face. “I just don’t want to ruin whatever he and I have now just for the sake of my own selfishness. Donghyuck deserves so much more than what I could offer.”

“How would you know?”

“W-what?” Mark was taken aback at the question. “What do you mean?”

“How would you know that’s what Donghyuck wanted?” Jeno repeated. “Did you ask him?”

“No?” Mark answered, uncertain. “I just assumed tha—”

“You’re scared, man,” Jeno said. “Scared to find out that what he wants is not the same with what you want.” Jeno knew that Donghyuck was special to Mark, just like how Jaemin was to him. But only now did Jeno comprehend just _how special_ Donghyuck was to his best friend, to an extent that Mark would actually be anxious and stressed.

Jeno gave the other an encouraging pat at his shoulder, a silent proclamation that he was supporting him and will stand beside him through anything. “Well, it’s alright. You’re not the only one. I’m scared as well,” Jeno continued, “scared about telling Jaemin anything.”

Mark listened, Mark was good at it. They rarely talked about their problems and as Jeno was uncharacteristically pouring his heart out, Mark lent him his ear. “What are you most scared of right now?” Mark probed when Jeno was finally done voicing out his own troubles.

“That he’ll leave if I tell him how I really feel,” Jeno confessed. Jeno had been certain for some time that he indeed liked Jaemin but was insecure about it. _Jaemin probably wouldn’t even like me back._

He heard Mark sigh. “We’re cowards, man. Both of us.”

Jeno wasn’t even going to argue since the older was right. “Yeah, that we are.”

It was tiring, how fucked up their lives were, regardless how other people thought highly of them. _You can’t have everything._

 

 

“We should do something,” Mark prompted. “We can’t let this keep on forever.”

“I was thinking the same thing too. You’re right, we should clean up this mess.”

“I’ll talk to Donghyuck tomorrow, no matter how hard it takes.” The idea sounded so ambiguous but Mark was finally determined for once. Donghyuck could lash out on him for all he cared, Mark was going to set matters straight between them. Donghyuck didn’t deserve it, he deserved so much more. “You should talk to Jaemin as well, sort things out.”

Jeno pondered on the notion for a bit before he slowly closed his eyes and heaved a breath to straighten his thoughts out in his juggled head. It was going to be difficult; Jaemin made it clear that he did not want to talk to him. Jeno should respect his wishes, right? But was Jeno going to leave it at that without a fight? Jeno had willingly let other people in his life disappear before and pass by without doing anything, so was he going to let Jaemin be one of them? Was he going to let Jaemin go?

 

 

 

 

“Fine, I’ll try,” he answered, finally decisive and it made Mark smile.

“Let’s make a promise, dude,” Mark proposed out of nowhere then turned to Jeno.

It sounded promising. “Like what?” Jeno asked, peeked through his thick lashes.

“Even though we might not get the person that we want, we’d still remain friends in the end.” He held his pinky finger up and Jeno laughed _._ “Let’s pinky swear on it.”

 _How childish could Mark get?_ Mark was fond of pinky promises even when they were still young and hadn’t grown out of the habit just yet. But nonetheless, Jeno still hooked his finger against the other’s and smiled— it was nostalgic somehow. “We only have each other after all,” he promised.

“You and me against the world, then? No take backs?” Mark quirked a brow at him, wagged them suggestively and Jeno grinned in return before he nudged Mark by the shoulder gently.

It was very endearing. Despite almost getting into an ugly brawl earlier, Mark was truly the only person who could understand Jeno better than himself. And he honestly wouldn’t want it any other way. Jeno was thankful that he had a friend like Mark.

“Yeah, you and me.”

And then they laughed like naive little kids, like they weren’t troubled at all, like they weren’t hurt— like they weren’t in love.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you guys are into supernatural!au and mysterious fics, do check out my JohnTen fic, Bad Blood. I really recommend that one since it's interesting. XD
> 
> Anyway, enjoy!

“Ringggggggggggg…….”

Jaemin groaned irritatingly at the deafening sound. He trashed and turned and buried his head with a pillow but the forsaken noise wouldn’t stop. His alarm clock had been ringing continuously for 5 minutes straight but Jaemin couldn’t bring himself to stand up and turn it off. He was too lazy to move.

Busy with his own inner feud, mentally noted pros and cons about wasting energy just to shut the damned device up, Jaemin hadn’t noticed the way the door to his room squeaked open and in came another male that turned his clock off for him.

“Hey, Jaemin-ah! Why aren’t you dressed yet?”

 

 

“What do you want?” Judging from the timbre of the other’s voice, it was bound to be his brother. But Jaemin wasn’t in the mood to answer formally; his face was still deep in his pillow and his response came out muffled.

“Mom told me to wake you up,” Yuta explained and sat at the end of the younger’s bed, the mattress dipped under his weight. “Hansol’s downstairs. He brought his car, he’s coming to school with us.”

“I don’t feel like going to school.”

“Why? You sick or something?”

“I’m just—” Jaemin had pulled himself off his messy sheets and turned to his older brother, hair tousled and state disheveled. “Hyung, I did something bad.”

Yuta raised a questioning brow though he was confused by the sudden assertion. “How bad?”

“Really bad.”

“….”

“…..”

 

 

“Okay.” Yuta was frowning and then he stood up abruptly that shocked the younger. “Does Mom need to know about this or do I have to—.”

As Yuta was about to take a step forward, Jaemin immediately grabbed onto the elder’s right wrist to prevent him from moving. “Hyung, it’s not that _bad!_ Mom doesn’t need to know.”

“Good, I thought you got yourself involved in a gang or started taking illegal drugs or something.” Yuta sounded relieved and even brought a hand to his chest and took a deep breath. Goodness, he was overly dramatic.

That was ridiculous, Jaemin thought as he let the older go. “Hyung, have more faith in me, will you?”

“Whatever you say.” Yuta waved his hand dismissively before he sat back down at his previous spot on the younger’s bed. “So, what is it? What did you do? I’m all ears.” 

Jaemin was slightly reluctant. Should he tell Yuta? What if Yuta was going to judge him? But Yuta’s eyes were expecting, waiting for him to continue so Jaemin just gave in. Yuta was his brother— he should at least trust him. So Jaemin told him a lot of things, but mostly about what had been going on between him and Jeno lately. He had made sure to leave out some information here and there though (about liking Jeno and all his mushy feelings for the slightly older male). Yuta did not need to know any of it, thank you very much.

“Wow, you’re actually pretty stupid, Jaemin,” Yuta said when Jaemin was done explaining, disbelief and mocking was clear in his face.

“Thanks for rubbing it in.” Jaemin rolled his eyes at his brother. Yuta wasn’t being helpful at all!

“I’m serious.” Yuta shrugged but he had a grin on his face, purposely riling the younger up. Teasing Jaemin had always been rewarding. “But why did you do it, though? Why did you ask Jeno to stay away?”

Jaemin thought for a minute. Exactly. Why did he?

 

 

“I don’t know— I was confused, shocked and I thought it was the right thing to do at that moment.” But who was he kidding? Jaemin clearly wasn’t at the right state of mentality then. He acted impulsively and did what he thought he had to do— run away. It was cowardly and stupid, but it had already happened— there was nothing he could do to change any of it. He had already hurt Jeno.

“Obviously, you were wrong.” Yuta looked disappointed, _very._ He hadn’t expected his brother to act like the way that he did at the slightest— Jaemin had been very insensitive at some point.

Jaemin sighed deeply. Guilt was eating him up alive. Usually he would defend himself but— he couldn’t even argue with the older when Jaemin knew that Yuta was right. “Tell me about it.”

 

 

Both boys were quiet for a while. Jaemin also ran out of words himself. He and Yuta rarely talked seriously so it was something new for the both of them. “I don’t actually know what to say to cheer you up right now.” Yuta looked rather sad knowing that he couldn’t aid Jaemin or offer any kind of help. “You know I’m bad at giving advice, right?”

Thought it was slightly close to the truth, Jaemin thought otherwise. “It’s alright, hyung. I just needed someone to talk to, somebody that would listen without prejudice.” Yuta just being there for him had already been more than enough. Besides Donghyuck, Jaemin hadn’t told anyone what had been happening. Bin and his other friends were worried since he had been acting strange and rather depressed but Jaemin just couldn’t tell them— it wasn’t just his problem to tell. It was exclusively just between him and Jeno; no one should interfere. And somehow, telling Yuta made things easier for Jaemin. It made the burden less and it was as if the weight of the world wasn’t on his shoulders anymore. “But what do you think I should do, hyung?”

“You’re smart, Jaemin, but you overthink alot. You might have fucked up now but you can still fix it if you want to.” Yuta was bad with words— sometimes he wondered how Hansol could stand being with him— but Yuta trusted his instincts and said the first thing that came to his mind. “Just follow your heart, okay? Or else, you’ll regret it until the very end.”

 

 

Jaemin was stunned. Yuta might be a big pain in the ass at times but Jaemin really could count on him when the situation called for it. They might not be related by blood but they’ll always be brothers.

Yuta extended his hand when he saw the astonished expression on Jaemin’s face and ruffled the younger’s brown locks in between his fingers endearingly. “C’mon, take a bath and hurry up. We’ll wait for you downstairs. Mom cooked your favorite so don’t lag off, okay?” Yuta added before he stood up and went out the door. “And yes, you’re coming to school with us. You can’t run away from Jeno forever. You guys still need to talk.”

Jaemin could only stare at elder’s retreating back as he gently closed the door behind him then sighed out loud, dropped his back onto the soft mattress again and stared at his white ceiling.

_Hyung is right. I need to talk to him._

* * *

 

_  
_

_  
_

 

It was a fine Monday afternoon, classes had ended and they were at their usual spot again, at the rooftop of their year building. When they arrived, they immediately sat on the cold tiled floor, their bags left at the corner while they stared at nothing in particular.

Jaemin wanted to play football after their last lecture with Bin and Chan since they asked him to join them but Donghyuck turned down the offer nonchalantly. Donghyuck then asked Jaemin if they could stay at the roof for a while, he wanted to tell Jaemin something. It seemed serious so Jaemin agreed, promising his other friends that they could play next time.

But ever since they came up, leaned their tired backs against the vertical steel railings, Donghyuck hadn’t said anything. Jaemin didn’t force him though. He knew Donghyuck too well; he would eventually speak up if was ready.

 

 

“Mark texted me,” Donghyuck finally said after a few moments of that much dreaded silence Jaemin was afraid of.

“Really? What did he say?” Jaemin was rather shocked. He wasn’t informed that the two were texting each other again. Donghyuck said a few days ago that he still couldn’t talk to Mark but now—

“He wants to meet, when his classes end.” Despite the winter holidays being near, the special class seem to have been busier lately that their lectures always ended late compared to normal classes. “To talk probably. He has been bugging me nonstop about it since last Saturday night. He sent me like a gazillion messages in one evening.”

Jaemin wasn’t a bit impressed. It was already expected of Mark. “And?” Jaemin probed, urged his best friend to continue. “Will you? Y’know, talk to him?”

 

 

 

“To be honest— I’m tired of it. Of running away, of ignoring him when all I ever wanted is to be around him." Donghyuck sighed, like he had been holding it for quite some time. "It freaking hurts, I miss him already.” Donghyuck looked dejected and lost.

Jaemin couldn’t help but smile fondly at the heartfelt explanation. Donghyuck really liked Mark. _Damn, that lucky bastard._ “You’re whipped, Hyuck.” Jaemin chuckled. He meant it in a good way though. “But if you feel that way, you should talk to him then. Honestly, you’re lucky Mark is head over heels for you or else he would have already dumped your sorry ass for being so complicated.”

“Yeah right. And you think you are any better?” Donghyuck rolled his eyes but the way he fought back a grin to break into his face made it contradictory. “So, what about you and Jeno? Will you talk to him again?”

Jaemin frowned at the sudden mention of the name. Donghyuck saw and was about to apologize for being tactless but Jaemin had beaten him to it, he shook his head. “I’m thinking about it, what to say and all that. But don’t worry, I’ll reconcile with him too. I’m just waiting for the proper timing.”

 

Before Donghyuck could add anything else, had already opened his mouth but his phone suddenly went off and came a rather familiar ringtone. Donghyuck glanced at the screen and Jaemin was sure that it was from Mark, judging from the way Donghyuck’s eyes widened marginally as he stared at the device. He turned to Jaemin, probably asking the younger if hw should answer the call or not. Jaemin gave him a small nod. _If Donghyuck wanted to talk to Mark then now should be the perfect time._

Although he was hesitant, Donghyuck brought his phone to his ear and answered. He swallowed hard, he looked rather nervous. “Yeah, hi.” Donghyuck was blushing— it was very obvious since he was tanned— and Jaemin had to stop himself from teasing his best friend. Mark was just at the other line, he would have heard. “Okay, yeah, see you.”

The conversation was cut short when Donghyuck ended the call and put his phone back inside his trousers. Donghyuck seemed rather happy and Jaemin smiled as he stared at his best friend.

“It was Mark.” Donghyuck said as he regarded Jaemin. “He skipped their last class, said he couldn’t wait to talk.”

“Freaking finally!” Jaemin exclaimed and Donghyuck hurriedly covered his mouth to keep his voice in.

“Bastard, don’t make a scene!”

“What? I’m just happy for you!” Jaemin added when Donghyuck retrieved his hand. “Good luck, Hyuck. He better be your boyfriend by tomorrow or else—”

“Piss off,” Donghyuck cursed, nudged his best friend’s side gently with his elbow and it made Jaemin chuckle while he feigned pain. “You too, good luck with Jeno, lover boy.”

For once in the past week, Donghyuck was smiling again— genuinely. Jaemin was happy for him.

_Just wait for it, I’ll be happy too._

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

Jaemin was left alone when Donghyuck excused himself and went to meet Mark. It was off putting, how he eventually to realized that there was no one there except him. Lately, Jaemin detested being alone in various situations. No, he wasn’t being sentimental. But he thought more deeply by himself, over complicated a lot of things in his head and Jaemin did not need to go all philosophical again when he was already a wreck.

Jaemin would never admit it out loud but— he sort of envied Donghyuck and Mark. Their relationship was complicated but at least they knew that they liked each other. _Does Jeno even like me?_  Thoughts like that made him doubtful and insecure and Jaemin’s mood would instantly drop.

“I knew I would find you here.”

 

 

 

“Hyung…”  

 

 

It was Ten.

 

 

 

Ten neared him and looked down at Jaemin who was still sitting on the cold floor with a warm smile on his face. “Why are you here? Where’s Johnny-hyung?”

“Yuta told me you needed my expertise. I came to help you,” Ten explained. “And Johnny’s at the library, studying. I told him I’d go find you so he let me be. You don’t how hard it was to convince him to let me talk to you alone,” Ten whined but there was still a hint of affection in his voice as he recalled his beloved boyfriend.

“Did Yuta-hyung tell you?” Jaemin asked. “About—”

“All Yuta told me was that you were bummed out and that you needed someone to talk to. And who would be perfect for the job other than your favorite hyung?” Jaemin smiled as Ten slummed down beside him. “So, spill. What has been bugging my favorite dongsaeng to make to look this down?”

 

Ten had always been one of his favorite people, he was comfortable around the other male. Despite the obvious age gap, Ten understood him better than some people, even better than Yuta did. Maybe that’s why his brother asked Ten to talk to him? Jaemin had been honest with Ten, he told him everything without reservations, had not left out a single detail; from how he and Jeno met till their recent misunderstanding. It was both gushy and nostalgic, how far he and Jeno had come ever since they crossed paths.

Ten listened the entire time, he hadn’t said anything in between Jaemin’s rumbles and allowed the younger to finish cleanly before he actually said, “Nana, I’m gonna be straight forward with you. Are you even sure you like Jeno?”

Jaemin was taken aback at the question. “What do you mean?”

Ten looked indecisive but he took a short breath and continued, “I know you know what he has been through and you feel sorry for him but maybe that’s just all that there is— pity. Not love. You like him because you think you can fill up the gap of his empty heart but Nana, you know you can’t. You think you can make everything better for him because he deserves to be happy.”

“But you can’t fix him, Nana. He’s already too broken— he knows that himself too,” Ten added further, his tone was serious yet impassive. “That’s why he doesn’t talk much, that’s why he keeps a lot to himself. He doesn’t want to bother anyone, he doesn’t want to be a burden. And the fact that you pushed him away probably hurt him. He has already lost a lot, he doesn’t want to lose anyone more.”

The way Ten made it sound— it hurt. It stabbed Jaemin’s heart in the most agonizing way possible. It was a big slap in the face— being blamed. But no matter how hard he denied it, Ten was right— it was the truth. Jaemin had undeniably hurt Jeno.

_How stupid can I get?_

“So tell me, seriously, do you _really_ like Jeno?”

 

 

Jaemin mentally counted to three to calm himself. After he was sure that his thoughts were straightened, he said, “To be honest hyung, I’ve never thought of it that way, of fixing him or anything. I did pity him, sure, he had been through a lot growing up but— that’s not why I stayed.” He did not know where the sudden confidence came from but Jaemin hadn’t pondered on it any longer and continued, “He just— makes me happy and I like being around him.”

It was a nice feeling. Being with Jeno had brought Jaemin nothing but happiness. How they met was purely coincidental and rather vague but Jaemin wouldn’t change anything even if he got the chance. Even in silent moments, he still preferred Jeno’s company over anyone else. “The Jeno I knew was always soft-spoken, he rarely talks at all but when he does he gets engrossed to the point that he wouldn’t realize that he’s already blabbering. His smile is the prettiest I’ve ever seen and he is simply beautiful.” Just because Jeno doesn’t speak much doesn’t mean he was faking everything, especially his actions. The way Jeno looked at him, the way Jeno took care of him, smiled at him like he was the only person that mattered— they can’t all be lies. Jeno hid a lot but he never crossed off as a liar. Jaemin never thought that. “Regardless of what his past was and what he is now— broken and whatnot, I still like him.”

 

 

_Yeah. I like him._

 

 

 

 

Ten’s face brightened at the confession, like he had been waiting for the younger to say the exact same thing since the moment he had arrived. “I’m proud of you, Nana.”

Wait …. Did Ten just— was it a test? Was Ten just testing him? To know if he really cared about Jeno or if it was just one of those childish phases?

But Jaemin couldn’t bring himself to care that much anymore. He felt so light, like his being was up in the clouds. It was heavenly, being honest with himself after all the stalling. The idea made Jaemin smile. Yes, Na Jaemin really did like Lee Jeno!

“So what are you waiting for?” Ten asked with a smile, rather impatient. “Talk to Jeno, set things straight, apologize and tell him what you really feel!”

“I will.” Jaemin was determined, returning back the grin and nodded his head vigorously.

“C’mon now, go! Get your man!”

Jaemin chuckled. Ten was practically pushing him away. “Thanks hyung!”

“Anything for you, Nana,” Ten said with another smile before Jaemin grabbed his bag and hurriedly went out of the door and climbed the staircase to search for Jeno. It was still early, Jeno couldn’t have possibly left.

_I could finally tell him that I like him._


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost done... Anyway, enjoy!

Jaemin was in a rush, he dashed from his building to Jeno’s in a huff, hadn’t minded bumping into innocent bystanders in his path as he ran across numerous crowded hallways. He couldn’t bring himself to care at all. He was in a hurry; he needed to see Jeno as soon as possible!

“Is Jeno here?!” Jaemin asked with urgency when he arrived at Jeno’s room. The area was filled with special class’ students and Jaemin instantly got embarrassed at his sudden outburst. He rigorously apologized for his rudeness and for interrupting them. Thankfully, the other kids paid him no mind, some gave out small chortles, and while others carried on with their tasks. They were used to seeing Jaemin in their room for the past months; he wasn’t a stranger in their eyes. Shortly after, Jaemin noticed Winwin and Chenle by their usual seats and immediately approached them. “Have you seen Jeno?” Jaemin asked again.

Although shocked at the his untimely and unannounced arrival, Chenle observed Jaemin from head to toe with a weird expression on his face. He was sweating like a pig. _Did he run all the way here?_ Chenle thought. “His bag is still here,” Chenle answered then he turned to his older seatmate. “Ge, you got a clue?”

Winwin had been on his phone the entire time, entertaining some messages from Kun, but the moment he saw the dishevelled Jaemin enter their room, hysterical and hurried, he hid the device almost instantly. “I think he said he would go outside, to stroll around or something.”

“Why did he leave his bag behind? Aren’t you guys heading home yet?”  
  
“We’re staying till later since we got a group project going on,” Chenle explained. “Why? Did you need something from Jeno-hyung?”

“Nothing in particular. I just—” Jaemin bit his lower lip, he was anxious, “—want to talk to him.”

Chenle saw the action but hadn’t questioned Jaemin about it, afraid that it would make the other male uncomfortable. “You could look for him outside. He’s probably in the grounds, we are still waiting for Mark-hyung anyway.”

“Okay.” Jaemin nodded his head. “Thanks, I’ll just look for him then. Anyways, I owe you one.”

 

 

“Hey Jaemin, is everything alright?” Winwin asked before Jaemin left to continue his quest on searching for the other light brown haired male. Winwin hated being a busybody and bothering other people with their own personal affairs but he had to ask; he couldn’t control the urge not to. Jeno had been strange lately, was down most of the time and Winwin was worried for his friend. Winwin didn’t like pointing fingers but he was certain to an extent that Jeno was acting weird because of Jaemin. “You and Jeno, are you two alright?”

Jaemin appeared like he was contemplating on what to say, going through various words inside his head before he settled with a simple yet meaningful, “we will be.”

Winwin was evidently pleased at the statement, and apparently, so was Chenle. “I’ll keep your word for it,” Winwin said. “Take care of Jeno for us, okay? Make him happy, he deserves it more than anyone.”

“You guys talk like as if you’re giving him away.”

“We’re just giving you our blessings as his friends, for y’know, just in case…..” Winwin shrugged his shoulders and grinned knowingly when he saw Jaemin flushed red.

“Keep in mind that even though we might be friends but if you hurt Jeno-hyung, you’re gonna get it,” Chenle threatened, but he still had a smile on his face when he said it so Jaemin wasn’t scared. “I’m not kidding, hyung.”

“I won’t.” Jaemin returned the simper and took his leave. “I won’t hurt him.” _Not ever again._

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

Jeno sighed deeply for the nth time that day as he leaned his clothed back onto one of the many school ground’s trees near the football field. Though the bark’s surface was rough and hard against his skin, the spot was comfortable enough that Jeno slowly closed his eyes shut.

They were supposed to do a project for their physics class that afternoon but Jeno asked Winwin if he could get some fresh air while they still had free time. He felt stuffy being inside their room for a few hours straight, it was suffocating. Classes might be wraping up for Christmas break but Jeno saw no end to all their schoolwork and extra assignments— their teachers were on a solid mission to let them suffer before the holidays. And since Chenle and Winwin wouldn’t think of starting on their project without Mark’s consent, they were waiting for him instead. Mark had skipped their last class that day. Before he left, Mark told them what he had in store. Mark went out to talk to Donghyuck, to officially ask the maroon haired male to be his boyfriend. The confession earned him a roar of happiness from Chenle and multiple pats of congratulations from Winwin. Finally, Mark had made his move and was ready to stake his claim.

But what was Jeno going to do? He was definitely lagging behind from his best friend.

“Jeno!”

Jeno opened his eyes and turned around as he heard his name being called out loud.

 

 

 

 

“Lami…” Jeno mumbled as a familiar looking girl neared him. She was neatly wearing their school’s uniform, her waist long black hair shining as the rays of sunlight hit it perfectly and her skirt gracefully swayed back and forth against her knees as she ran towards Jeno.

“Why the long face?” Lami asked as she stared down on the wary looking male who sat cross legged. “You look sad.”

“Not really. I’ve always been like this.” Jeno scooted over to give her some space to sit on beside him.

“No wonder girls swoon over you.” Lami gratefully accepted the other’s quiet invitation and settled down on the ground. “The mysterious yet gentle prince Lee Jeno,” she teased and nudged him on his shoulder playfully.

“Nonsense.” Jeno chuckled at ridiculous notion and Lami smiled, seeing as though Jeno didn’t look as down compared to earlier. “What are you doing out here anyway?”

“I came to talk to Hina. I was planning to go back to the room when I saw you here, thought we could go back together.” Lami was another one of Jeno’s classmates but she was also a friend. Lami was quite famous in school. She was the friendliest girl in their class and well, everyone loved her because of it. “Aren’t you gonna work on your project? Isn’t it due tomorrow?”

“We’re still waiting for Mark to come back. He had some unfinished business to take care of so we can’t start on anything without him.”

Lami was about to add something, probably to interrogate Jeno further, when they both heard a meow close by. They turned their heads at the direction of the source.

 

 

 

Jeno’s gaze landed on a small creature that was hiding behind the tree they were leaning on.

It was the kitten from before!

It had been awhile since Jeno last saw the adorable feline and noticed that it had fattened somehow. _It looks like someone is feeding it well._ The cat had fully revealed itself, had willingly detached from its hiding place and was staring at them— at Jeno more specifically. Its orbs were glistering underneath the daylight, beads of emerald sparkled beautifully as it slowly approached Jeno.  

Jeno picked it up from his feet when it was near enough and laid the feline on his lap, patted its soft and subtle snow white fur gently. The small animal mewled and nuzzled its head against the fabric of Jeno’s slacks at the comforting contact.

“Is she yours?” Lami asked as she ogled the delicate creature with sparkling eyes.

“Nope,” Jeno answered. “I found it here a few weeks ago. It just got attached to me somehow.”

“It really likes you,” Lami said with a faint smile. It was obvious that Lami was the type who adored animals.  

“Do you wanna hold her?” Jeno suddenly offered.

Lami was hesitant, somewhat anxious, but Jeno could tell that she really wanted to do it. “Can I?”

Jeno nodded his head and handed her the cat, careful enough so that the feline wouldn’t get shocked. Lami tensed up at first but when the cat started mewling instead of hissing and appeared quite calm in Lami’s arms, her face broke down into another happy smile, showing off her array of perfectly white teeth. “She’s so cute,” she cooed.

Jeno could only watch Lami quietly as she tried to converse with the cat. “Yeah,” Jeno found himself mumbling. It was nostalgic, how it reminded Jeno of a certain person who he had been missing terribly for the past few days, someone who was just as cute as the cat.

 

Jeno and Lami talked for a bit more as Lami continued playing with the animal; their topics ranged mostly about school and their subjects— nothing more.

 

 

 

“Oh!” Lami exclaimed as the cat suddenly jumped out of her hold and wandered somewhere else. They followed its bum until it stopped in front a pair of shoes and rubbed its head against an unknowing stranger’s feet. Jeno was stunned as he saw who it was when he looked up to confirm its identity.

“Hey Jeno, isn’t that your friend for the other class?” Lami asked as she noticed the newcomer.

 

 

 

 

 

“Isn’t that Na Jaemin?”

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

Jaemin had been running like a maniac for a few minutes and he was so close to losing his mind, his sanity was hanging on by a loose thread and he was about to crack. _Where the hell could Jeno be in this damned school!?_ Jaemin had circled the high building but still no sign of Lee Jeno anywhere. He was tempted to go over to the college department but somehow he knew Jeno wouldn’t even think of going there. _Where is he?!?!_

 

In the midst of his torment and inner monologue, an idea struck him like lighting and he immediately dashed. _Stupid! Why haven’t I remembered this sooner?!_

 

 

 

Jaemin headed straight for the school grounds.

 

 

 

 

 

 

And yes, Jaemin’s instincts were right all along. Jeno was indeed there, sitting by the tree, the exact same place Jaemin had first seen him up close and strike up a conversation.

 

 

But he wasn’t alone. Jeno was with someone— with Lami, one of the prettiest and most popular girls in their year. And he was smiling.

 

 

_Damn it._

 

 

 

Jaemin was so caught up at gawking at the two that he hadn’t noticed the familiar cat nuzzling its head against his feet. Jaemin’s face paled, like the blood was drained right out of him.

_They look perfect for each other._

 

 

 

“Isn’t that Na Jaemin?”

 

 

 

When Jaemin heard his name, with Jeno looking at him with something akin to longing in his eyes, Jaemin’s mind went overload and did it again— he ran away. Jaemin wasn’t sure what got into him that time but his feet moved on their own, like they were hard wired to run away. _Why am I always doing this?!_

 

 

 

 

“Jaemin!”

 

 

 

It was Jeno’s voice. _Is he following me?_

 

 

Jeno kept shouting Jaemin’s name repeatedly in the open air but the latter wouldn’t stop running. He wasn’t even sure where he was heading exactly but he needed to be somewhere else, somewhere other than there.

 

 

“Jaemin!”

 

 

 

 

The sight of Jeno laughing happily with another person, especially a girl, wouldn't leave his head— it hurt his heart.

_Damn it. This is the worst._


	19. Chapter 19

 

“Jaemin!”

Jeno was almost out of breath, his chest rose and fell as he took several desperate pants to regain his oxygen intake whilst running all over the place for a few minutes. Jaemin was a fast runner since he did sports and wouldn’t stop no matter how much Jeno told him to but Jeno still tried his hardest not to lag behind. The pained expression on Jaemin's face, when their eyes met briefly earlier as he was with Lami, was still engraved his memory. _Why did he look hurt? What happened?_ Jeno increased his pace— did not care if he ran out of steam or not— and inched forward until he grabbed the other by the wrist. They needed to talk.

“Stop.” Finally, he had gotten a hold of Jaemin. Though it was difficult, he pulled Jaemin until they were behind a nearby building, away from prying eyes, so that they could talk freely and wouldn’t cause a scene. It was already late in the afternoon so there weren’t a lot of high students left in the area.

“Let go of me!” Jaemin shouted, pulled his hand back but it was in vain. Jeno’s grip was strong.

“Not until you tell me what was that all about,” Jeno argued and reeled him in.

But Jaemin was stubborn. “I said, let go of me!”

Jeno would have understood if it was in another circumstance— he would have— but no matter hard he tried analyzing the situation over and over again in his head, he just couldn’t comprehend. Jaemin was behaving like a child, impulsive and irrational, squirming out of Jeno’s touch, shouting, and it irked Jeno to the point that he realized that he had enough. “Jaemin! Stop it!”

 

* * *

 

 

“Jaemin! Stop it!

Jaemin was stunned at the sudden raise of tone; he flinched evidently at the sound. _Jeno never does that._ Jeno’s movement came to stop, both of them did. Jeno had managed to back him up into an unfamiliar building’s wall, Jaemin’s clothed back pressed against the concrete while Jeno stood before him with a menacing face, something Jaemin had never seen before. The grip Jeno had on his wrist was also too tight— it was bound to bruise. Jeno’s eyes flickered in a strange manner and it darkened gradually. Jeno looked mad— really mad. _What have I done?_

A few seconds fleetingly passed by but neither boys had said something. It was so suffocating, how quiet they were. Jaemin was scared, really frightened, and Jeno might have noticed how Jaemin stiffened after his sudden outburst. Jaemin had his head downcast, afraid to stare at the older. Jeno was guilty. So with a heavy feeling of regret, Jeno retrieved his hand; Jaemin suddenly missed the warmth it emitted when the palm left his regardless of how hard the grasp was. “I’m sorry for shouting,” Jeno apologized in a gentle voice. “I’m sorry for scaring you.”

 _Why is he sorry? Jeno did nothing wrong!_ The words echoed in Jaemin’s head repeatedly like a broken record and it was sickening the more it lingered in his consciousness. Jaemin was trembling somehow, resentful and embarrassed. He found himself leaning down and was carefully trapped inside Jeno’s arms. Jeno had hugged him. “Calm down, okay?” Jeno whispered in his ear, trying to sooth the younger’s nerves away, caressed soft circles on his back. His breath was hot and Jaemin was shaken.

 

It took a while before Jaemin finally managed to calm down but Jeno hadn’t let him go before he did. There they stood, awkwardly enclosed the other in a protective embrace. But it was comfortable. When Jaemin’s breathing turned even, Jeno pulled him back by his shoulders, offered a small smile then said, “Now, tell me what’s wrong?”

Jaemin wasn’t sure what to say, how he should act after everything. He was insecure, anxious and definitely clueless. “I’m sorry,” he uttered lowly, Jeno almost hadn’t caught it.

“Sorry for what?”

“For a lot of things,” Jaemin started. “Do you want me to go alphabetically?” It was meant as a joke to ease the tension between them but Jeno didn’t look impressed as Jaemin thought he initially would be. Jaemin pursed his lips into a tight line. “I’m sorry for everything that I’ve put you through— for running away, for pushing you away, for being an insensitive jerk, for everything!” he breathed, “what I did was stupid, I know that now! But it was just— I was so confused.”

Jeno had been listening intently, eyeing Jaemin’s reactions for any slight change and asked, “Confused about?”

“Myself and the feelings I have for you.”

 

 

 

“Jaemin, what do you mean?” Jeno tilted his head to the side in confusion, brows knitted in question.

Was Jaemin going to finally admit what he really felt for Jeno? _Is this it?_

 

“I know you don’t want to hear this but bear in mind, I didn’t want this to happen as well— it just did.”

“What?” It hadn’t made the situation less complicated than it already was. Jeno looked genuinely lost. “Jaemin, where are you going with this? You’re confusing me.”

“I— it happened so suddenly, after we became close, or probably even before that, but one day, I just realized that I couldn’t stop thinking about you no matter how hard I try. It was straining, I couldn’t sleep well at night and I stare off in space at day.” Explaining how he really felt was hard, Jaemin knew he was blurting out nonsense and Jeno might not even understand half of it but it had to be done, Jaemin had to let it out before his heart exploded. “I was so confused why it was happening to me— I did not know what to do.” His chest was hurting. Was he going to die? He felt like he was. “I— like y-you!”

 

 

 

Silence soon followed. Jaemin had his eyes closed tightly but he was expecting. Jeno just stood there, hadn’t uttered anything as he continued to stare at Jaemin, without word, tracing the latter’s face in his mind until the picture was engraved in his memory permanently. His face remained passive despite the rapid beating of his own heart.

Jaemin had grown sick of the stillness. “Please say something. Anything!” Jaemin knew that his confession was lousy and stupid and not what he had in mind but the way that Jeno remained unperturbed as the latter received his proclamation was nerve wrecking. He was beyond antsy, his hands were shivering and he wanted to disappear, to dig put a hole and hide there for all of eternity. He just confessed to Jeno! And it was just as mortifying as he thought. “Get mad! Shout at me!  Anything! But don’t stay silent, p-please? I-it’s killing m-me.” Goodness, he was beyond distress that his eyes started to sting in frustration. “P-please….”

 

 

 

But what Jeno answered in return definitely took Jaemin aback. “Tell me this is real. Tell me I’m not dreaming.”

Jaemin’s eyes faltered open at the statement. He hadn’t seen that one coming, not by a mile.

 

* * *

 

 

 

“Tell me I’m not dreaming,” Jeno said lowly in disbelief, but like a whisper, meant for only Jaemin to hear.

When the words caught his sensitive ear, Jaemin opened his eyes to stare at the other incredibly. “What?”

“You’re not joking, right? You’re being serious?” He was bewildered. Did Jaemin confessed to him? He wasn’t just imaging it, right? He heard it with his own ears, right?

“Of course I’m serious! Why wouldn’t I be?!”

Jaemin looked offended, crossed at Jeno’s query but Jeno couldn’t blame him. Jaemin was serious and it was stupid to ask. “I don’t know,” Jeno answered, almost uncertain. His head was in a frenzy and he tried his absolute hardest to stay cool outwardly but his mind was a train wreck. He collected every bit of sanity and rationality he had left in his distraught state so he wouldn't utter another unintelligible statement. “I just don’t know what’s going on inside your mind a lot of times, I thought I could but I can’t. You look like you’re easy to read but in fact, that’s not the case. You’re very unpredictable, Jaemin.”

“I— I k-know, I— I’m sorry.” Jaemin ran out of things to say, in the end he just sighed warily. “Really, Jeno, I am.”

Jaemin looked so dejected and vulnerable, and Jeno hated it. “Don’t be.” Jeno shook his head disapprovingly. “It’s not your fault. I guess… it was all mine.”

Disappointment shone through Jaemin’s orbs but Jeno overlooked it and brushed the sight off. “Don’t say that.”

“But it is,” Jeno insisted. “I mean, I’m bad with people, I don’t know how to handle them, everyone for that matter. I don’t know how I should act around them. Mark and the others— sometimes I ask how they could still stand me all throughout these years, when I’m, y’know, _me._ " There it was again, the same venomous tone he used when he talked about his parents before, when Jeno told Jaemin about his past. And now that the tables were turned, he had used it on himself. He promised he wouldn’t but he did. Jeno chuckled bitterly at the notion. "And with you.... it’s all the same. I understand why you wanted me out of your life.”  If Jeno was honest, when Jaemin asked to leave him alone, that day on the rooftop, it hurt; it wounded his pride and ego, but most especially, it broke his heart, smashed it into smithereens. All he wanted was to see Jaemin and yet again, he was pushed aside and left wanting from a distance. But after careful thought, Jaemin had every right to ask Jeno to stay away. At some point, Jeno had been selfish, pressuring the younger with his own advances. Jaemin didn’t deserve that. And Jeno was just not good enough.

“It’s not like that, Jeno," Jaemin disagreed but Jeno was just as stubborn as he was. "It has never been like that.”

“I get it, Jaemin. No use trying to make things better for me.” Jeno waved his hand dismissively; he was so convinced with his own perspective that he hadn’t listened to Jaemin’s desperate pleas anymore, had deemed them very unnecessary given the situation. “You don’t have to lie anymore, okay?”

“But Jeno—”

For once in his life, Jeno felt completely hopeless and tired. “I’m afraid,” he started. Jeno wasn’t sure why he was being truthful all of a sudden but it was better than nothing. Mark was right, he wasn’t going to achieve anything if he just continued staring, pining in silence and did nothing. He had to do _something_. “I have been so used to people leaving me behind that I don’t seem to care anymore if someone else does. In that sense, I felt like I had nothing left to lose and I wouldn’t get to feel the exact kind of pain I felt back then. It was playing safe, being a coward, but I preferred it that way. I just didn’t want to get hurt anymore. I didn’t want to hurt anyone.”

“But then you came along, you made everything brighter, the world seemed like a better place with you in it. You gave me something to look forward to everyday, seeing you, hanging around, and just being with you.” Jeno smiled fondly as he looked back at Jaemin but it wasn’t right. It didn’t reach till his eyes like it usually did. “But that’s just it. As time passed by, I started having these feelings for you and I got scared. I’m scared that everything will end eventually because I know it will. Everything ends, it always does. I'm scared at the very possibility that I’ll get hurt, that you’ll be dragged into this mess that I created, that all of this,” Jeno gestured towards himself and at Jaemin, “will just be a beautiful dream and that you’ll disappear when I wake up.” Jeno’s voice sounded so strained and wary, his body was hunched forward. “And I don’t want that.”

 “Jeno, I won’t do that.” Jaemin was trying to let Jeno see reason, though Jeno had turned a blind eye on him. “It won’t end up like that.”

 Jeno didn't listen. “Y'know what, I like you too. Wait .. no, _in fact,_ I love you," he emphasized, albeit his previous actions had told otherwise, Jeno meant very word. Jeno smiled again but he knew it wasn't genuine, Jaemin knew that too. Suddenly, everything turned stuffy. It was starting to get dark, faint shadows formed underneath their feet, and though the sun was slowly setting behind his back and the skies were illuminated by colorful hues, Jeno couldn't seem to care. The ambiance was romantic but it wasn't how things were supposed to be. It wasn't how their mutual confession should have happened. "But— whatever this is, whatever we have between us, let’s just forget about it.”

 

 

 

“What?” Jaemin was dumbstruck at the proposition. "How could you say that?" His voice cracked again, he was close to tears and Jeno hated himself for intentionally hurting Jaemin like that.

“Can’t you see how complicated it already is? If it’s this hard for you, for us, now then it would be much harder later on. How about we just stay as friends while we still can? Like what we already are?" The hand he still had on Jaemin's shoulder slowly slid down his school jacket, hanging loosely by the sleeves until Jeno had finally let him go. "That way, no one will get hurt.” It sounded so vague in his head, so selfish, but Jeno had no other option. If it meant that Jaemin would be free from any more potential harm and heartbreak, and even if Jeno's own feelings were at stake, so be it.

 

Jaemin appeared speechless and confused. He opened his mouth, his lips were evidently quivering, but was quick to close it back again in hesitation. In that sense, Jeno knew that Jaemin would agree eventually, that Jaemin couldn't think of a comeback to counter his request. Then, Jeno instinctively took a step back. Since the dispute was clear and there was no point in talking anymore, he had to leave, he still had to do his part for their group project. Mark probably had came back and his friends were waiting for him at their classroom. And also, Jeno wasn't in the mood to stay and wait for Jaemin to recover, he had to get away, or else, he wouldn't move on.  _It's for the best._

But just as he was about to spun around and retreat his earlier strides, Jaemin harshly grabbed him by the arm, both hands reached out to keep Jeno still, preventing him to leave. Jeno slowly regarded the other male, his gaze was questioning. Then Jaemin found his voice and courage back and finally said, stern and decisive, “I don’t want to be your friend, Jeno.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1 more chapter and epilogue left. Lol.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, the last chapter (there will be an epilogue but idk when I'll post it up though lol Please anticipate it though 'cause it is hella amazing and cute). I know I promised I'd post the last chapter right after the previous one but I wanted it to be special so I changed and added a few stuff to make this more memorable.
> 
> It was a tough ride but yeah, it's ending. TAC had been my escape when school related stuff became too much to handle and I'm happy that alot of you guys read it. At some point, I was kinda dissatisfied with it and wanted to delete it instead 'cause istg the first few chapters were shitty af (idk why y'all keep reading this tbh) but nah, I wanted to finish this and here we are. :)
> 
> Me and axidreinn started writing this after NCT Dream debuted and now we're ending it with them coming back. Keep supporting those kids, okay? (And the rest of NCT as well). 
> 
> Thank you for reading this story, I met awesome people because of this. I even talk to some in twitter and I find it to be quite fun. I keep saying this and I think I'll never stop, y'all are the real mvps and I appreciate every comment and vote. Thank you. 
> 
>  
> 
> \- Kiiesaa

 

 

Jaemin wasn't going to lie, it hurt. Every single word that spewed out of Jeno's mouth, accidentally or intentionally, it pang his heart and it stung— really bad. Was Jeno even aware of it? But, seeing the way Jeno's once gentle orbs glint in distrust and silent melancholy made Jaemin realize that he wasn't the only one— Jeno was pained as well.

Jaemin was quick to admit that it was his fault why Jeno had turned out like that and there was no cure that could heal their mutual wounds. Perhaps it was karma's way of saying he had fucked up big time and there was no way out? Jaemin wanted nothing more than the misunderstanding to end already. Jaemin felt too tired, too numb to cry, but silent tears were clinging on his cheeks, and it took him everything he had to clench his teeth instead, bottle away the grief and to wait just a little bit longer.  _Everything will be alright,_ he told himself repeatedly like an overused mantra. But maybe ... that was a lie as well.

When Jeno attempted to leave, prompted to take a step back, Jaemin's hands immediately flew and held Jeno by his arms, securely, afraid that he'd go away. Jeno had turned to him, eyes questioning yet waiting, anticipating what Jaemin's next move would be.

"I don't want to be your friend, Jeno," Jaemin finally said, with every ounce of conviction he had left in him. Jeno looked stunned and disappointed at the same time with his statement, and Jaemin was glad that he was. He was not going to allow Jeno to do whatever he wanted like that. "I don't want to be _just_ your friend." Jaemin corrected. "I don't want to be at the same level as all your other friends. I don't want to be like Mark who you are closest yet can't freely talk to, like Chenle, or Taeyong-hyung, or anyone else for that matter," he enumerated one by one. "I don't want that. I want something  _more_."

"But—"

"Jeno, listen to me," Jaemin beat him to it, before Jeno could make up another excuse. He was going to make Jeno see reason; he was going to make Jeno listen no matter how hard it was. "If this is about your past, I don't care. Those stuff? They don't matter. You don't live there anymore, you shouldn't let what happened before dictate how you live your life now. What matters is right now; you, me—  _us._  We matter, Jeno." Jaemin swore he almost choked on his own words when he let all of it out in a huff, almost frantic, hurriedly wanting Jeno to comprehend.  _Where did I get this sudden gush of confidence from?_  "I know a lot of people had hurt you but I won't do that. I won't leave you like they did."

"How could you be so sure? How would you know?" Jeno turned abruptly to look straight at Jaemin, lips tugged down into an obvious frown at his statements. "My parents, they—"

"I'm not them, Jeno!" It was impulsive— his instincts were getting the best of him again— and crude. Jaemin didn't mean to shout out loud, to stun Jeno but he did; he couldn't stop himself. Jaemin was getting relentless and frustrated the more Jeno tried to box him out. "I'm not like your parents, I'm me! And stop thinking that we'll end up like they did. We're not them, and we will never be. I— I won't leave you." Jeno parted his lips to retort, to argue back but before he could, Jaemin continued on rambling almost incoherently, "Okay, I'm sorry since I already did but I promise I won't do it again. I swear, with all my heart," he breathed. Jaemin bit his lower lip nervously as sudden flashes of what he did to the slightly older male flooded his mind. But the deed was done, Jaemin knew that; someone had already suffered. There was no use trying to take back all the agony and foolishly wish that he could turn back time and make things better. "I'm done with running away, from you or from my own feelings. I just— I love you, okay?" It should have sounded sweet, or romantic, or anything within those lines but it was strenuous at some point.  _Our confession shouldn't have happened this way._ "So please, give me a chance,  _give us_  a chance."

"I already did," Jeno answered. Jaemin could feel his heart clenching painfully in his chest when he saw Jeno's pained expression though the latter tried to mask it out by remaining detached. Jeno's words had the ability cut him like knife and Jaemin wasn't sure how long he'd be able to handle it. "Wasn't it enough?"

"Then,  _one more_  time,  _one more_  chance," Jaemin trailed off, voice was starting to crack. _Shit, not now._ "P-please?" Jaemin's throat was dry and he stuttered in between dialogue. And when Jeno offered him no reply, the little bit of hope Jaemin had inside him— that Jeno would still reconsider his pleas— dispersed. Everything fell apart and Jaemin felt his world crumbling down into nothing. "Jeno, you can't possibly think I'm that shallow, right?"

"I don't know,  _are you_?"

Jaemin kept repeating inside his head that Jeno had every right to get mad at him but— goodness, it hurt. "I—" Jaemin faltered, it was difficult to speak.

Both hadn't said anything for a while, Jaemin was silently picking up the remainder of his broken heart. He opened his mouth to say something, but was fast to close it again in hesitation. It was cruel.

 

 

 

 

"Will it be worth it?" Jeno said after a few moments which caught Jaemin off guard. His adam's apple bob prominently as he swallowed. Ah, Jeno was nervous— probably just as much as Jaemin was. "Jaemin, will all of these," he gestured between himself and Jaemin with his hand, "be worth it?"

Jaemin was rendered speechless at the query, not because the question was far-fetched or unreasonable, but rather, it was because he hadn't thought about it before. "I can't answer that."

"Why not?" Jeno asked.

"'Cause the future is something I can't predict, it just— it happens," he answered.

"But can you foresee it?" Jeno took a committed step forward, leaving Jaemin no place to run or move, a foot separated their bodies from each other. And when Jaemin got a clearer view of Jeno's face, the foundation of it changed, slipped into a momentary lapse of confusion and that was when Jaemin realized that their breaths were tangled across each other. "Me, in your future?  _Us_? Together?"

 

 

 

 

 

"Yeah," Jaemin answered airily. "I can."

"And? What do you see?" Jeno asked again, his voice low.

Jaemin tried not to stare, but somehow his gaze was drawn to Jeno like a magnet. "Something  _real_." They were so complex, to the point of being ridiculous; but it was not one sided, both of them were difficult. However it wouldn't stop Jaemin from wanting to believe with every inch of energy he had left, that there really was something between him and Jeno. Something they share which was unpredictable and delicate and special. Something that made Jaemin push aside every doubt and every anxiety crawling over his shivering body. " _And beautiful_." Jaemin smiled genuinely for the first time.

 

 

 

 

 

"Jaemin. Why are you crying?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

He was?

Although astounded by what Jeno said, Jaemin held out a hand and gently caressed his face, it was damp. He was crying. Had it been for a while now? He hadn't noticed. "Because.." He trialed explaining but he could think up of anything believable to make him appear less pathetic than he already was. A snuffle came, then a more audible sob. A lone tear fell down his eye, rolled from his cheek without consent and even though he tried to turn his head so that the older wouldn't notice, Jeno already saw it.

"There you go again, crying for someone else." Jeno took out his hand and reached for Jaemin. Jaemin felt dozen of electric bolts ran down his spine when skin grazed skin briefly. Jeno softly wiped the droplet that was straining Jaemin's delicate face away with his thumb, careful enough so that Jaemin wouldn't get hurt. But the tears kept falling, the more Jeno touched him.

"I.. I-I can't h-help it," Jaemin hiccuped. He was stubborn by nature, Jaemin couldn't help it.

Seeing as though Jaemin wouldn't listen, Jeno waited until the younger had composed himself and when his breathing finally turned even, by instinct, Jeno fixed his messy fringe that was sticking untidily on his forehead with delicate fingers. Jeno could see the tears glistening on Jaemin's chiseled cheekbones, could see them creep down into the hollow by his ear, and it made him ache. He tousled Jaemin's locks endearingly for extra measure. "Don't cry anymore, okay? Even if it's for me, I don't want to see you sad."

Eyes now dry, Jaemin said, "I can't promise that—"

"Stubborn, Nana." Jeno cut him off before he could finish his sentence but Jaemin didn't mind the interruption, not when Jeno had worn a smile whilst he looked at him.

"Call me that again." Goodness, he sounded so needy but he couldn't bring himself to care at all. "By my nickname. I've missed it." He hated his nickname— he still did— but not anymore when it came from Jeno, when there was a truck load of emotions attached whenever the older male called him that. Jaemin still hated Ten for coming up with it but Jeno had always been the only exception to everything.

 

 

 

 

"Silly." Jeno chuckled lightly, his breath came out as smoke and it looked pretty. "Of course,  _Nana_. Anything you want."

Jaemin was smiling happily when he heard the familiar nickname slip pass Jeno's lips. He felt fulfilled somehow.

And as for Jeno, seeing the way Jaemin's eyes curled upwards as he grinned made him feel slightly giddy, imagery butterflies fluttered in his stomach. Jeno found the sight rather cute,  _very._ But his inner monologue was cut off when he caught Jaemin staring silently yet deeply with evident admiration into his eyes. They were still in their previous position as before; Jaemin backed against the wall and Jeno was in front of him. They hadn't moved at all. But only then did Jeno realize just how  _close_ they were; their bodies barely had any gap between them and their faces were inches apart. It wasn't uncomfortable though, Jeno liked it. He could gawk at the other freely. And honestly, Jaemin was very pretty up close. Of course Jeno had already knew that prior but there was something majestic about the way Jaemin's gorgeous chocolate orbs shone against the barely noticeable sun light, how his long lashes softly grazed his face as he blinked, how cute and pointed his nose was, and his lips— especially his lips.

Everything was visually overwhelming and it warmed his heart. Jeno wanted to confess again right then and there, to tell Jaemin that he loved him, to properly ask Jaemin out before the chance got away again, his chest was threatening to burst but— Jeno was too distracted by the idea that he wanted to kiss Jaemin so bad. His eyes unintentionally dropped to the plump flesh and he wanted nothing more than to claim it like it was long overdue. It was so tempting. But he was reluctant as well; a lot of thoughts were going through this mind by the second and he was confused on what action to execute next. But the way Jaemin was looking up to him, a smile on his face, so beautiful and real, it made it hard to breathe for some reason.

So he did what he thought he had to do; Jeno leaned in slowly, but careful enough not to scare Jaemin away. Jaemin visibly flinched at their sudden close proximity when Jeno cupped his cheek gently, so Jeno stopped mid-way. He waited, for any sign of protest; he didn't want Jaemin to hate him, or to run away again. But when he saw Jaemin close his eyes willingly, awaited what Jeno was going to do next, Jeno knew there was no turning back— it was inevitable. So with enough mustered courage, Jeno drew him in for a kiss.

The distance between them decreased and when their lips touched for the very first time, for Jeno, everything felt so right. It felt like home. Invisible fireworks exploded behind his closed lids, like in those romance movies, like they were meant for each other in some odd way. The lock was clumsy yet innocent and pure at the same time, lips pressed firmly against each other, no movement, just feelings. Jeno was afraid to ruin the moment so he hadn't pushed Jaemin further than that, to venture into uncharted territories that both weren't ready for— not yet. They were young, they have their whole lives ahead of them, and there was no need to rush.

Jeno pulled back after a few moments, couldn't fight back his own smile that curled upwards at the corner of his mouth as he rested his forehead against Jaemin's. And Jeno loved him so fucking much —he'll never be able to tell him enough, but god, he loved him. "Never ever leave me again, okay?" Again, the situation was nostalgic, like they've done it before. It felt so warm somehow. "Promise me?"

Jaemin nodded enthusiastically after he had recovered from his initial haze, stared at the other male through half lidded eyes then returned the grin wholeheartedly. "I promise."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will post the epilogue soon!


	21. EPILOGUE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dated a few years after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is it. Thank you for sticking by. Till the next long-ass Jaeno/Nomin fic! Xoxo.

Mark was gently tapping his slender fingers against the wooden table, a cupful of freshly brewed coffee on his other hand. He had brought the ceramic close to his mouth and took a generous sip. Donghyuck had told him long before that a cup of good quality tasting caffeine would always be enough to heal his fatigued self and Donghyuck had never been wrong before. The aroma of sweets and pastries in the small yet tranquil vicinity was enough to chase away the stress he had accumulated from all his recent business meetings and trips, his body went lax and he felt better already. _Donghyuck was right._

 

Mark had found the unique looking café on his second day back in Seoul when he decided to wander around the streets impulsively. He just happened to pass by the shop, it was purely coincidental. He was hungry and a certain magnetic pull had urged him to go inside even when he was a picky eater. The ambiance was nice, Mark thought. The place wasn’t big in size and space but it felt exactly like home, the air was warm and food tasted really good. There were a few Japanese paintings and scripts written on the walls and it was very aesthetic. Mark made a mental note to bring Donghyuck to the said café if ever he brought his lover with him back to Korea.

 

It was very nostalgic. It had only been a few years but Mark missed everything about Seoul; the cold winter air, the busy streets, the swarms of people during rush hours and the food that he had enjoyed so much when he was younger. Albeit he grew up in Canada, it could never compare to Seoul. It was his second home. Mark then questioned why he rarely comes back to visit when the feeling was superb every single time he did. But then again, he had a ton of unfinished work and truckload of responsibilities back in Canada that he could never neglect no matter how much he wanted to.

 

As he was in the middle of his buzzing thoughts and sentiments, small brass bells attached to the door of the café jiggled and the sound resonated around the area. A familiar figure had came in; a tall and handsome man in his early thirties, dressed in casual clothes, average sneakers, topped off with a thick coat gracing his broad back. His best friend looked exactly the same as Mark remembered him, like he had never aged during the time they were separated. As the other entered the shop, he looked around for a bit; head scanning the place for his alleged meeting parter. There weren’t a lot of people inside so he was able to locate Mark at the vacant table at the back most part, right beside the window.

 

“Jeno,” Mark called the newcomer from afar, even raising his hand so the other could spot him easily.

 

Jeno broke into a smile when he saw the person he was looking for. “Hey Mark,” he greeted as he came near. Mark beckoned the younger to occupy the seat across from his.

 

“Want anything?” Mark asked as Jeno had finally settled in. He took off his coat and hanged it behind the back of the chair he was sitting on and then turned to look at menu on the table. Jeno was always troubled when it came to choosing what to eat so when it took him awhile to come up with a response, “the usual?” Mark asked with raised brows. Jeno smirked in reply then nodded his head.

 

Mark called the waiter’s attention and ordered a plain black Americano for his friend then a small snack to go with it since Jeno had always liked his coffee strong and bitter. They chatted for a bit as they waited.

 

They had set that meeting of their's months prior when both found out that they would be in Seoul at the same time. Despite their frequent video calls, it had been about 3 years since Mark last saw his best friend in the flesh. They had a lot of catching up to do. After their high school graduation, Mark went back to Canada to study for college while Jeno and the rest stayed behind. Mark took over their family business shortly after that. He had very busy ever since, barely had enough time to hang out or talk to anyone for that matter.

 

The last time they met up was probably at Johnny and Ten’s wedding and that was ages ago! The two lovebirds got married in the states and even though their friends were mostly in Seoul while the others were scattered all around the world, Ten was very tenacious. He hunted everyone down and demanded they attended his wedding against all odds. Nobody could say no, of course, it was Ten for crying out loud! Mark hadn’t seen his other hyungs in awhile and he had missed them all just the same so he agreed without second thoughts. Everyone came to the wedding; the occasion had turned into their gang’s own grand reunion, it was spectacular and quite memorable.

 

But since their time to bond and reconnect was limited and both Mark and Jeno’s schedules were packed and hectic with their own respective dealings, they hadn’t stayed long and left— Mark with Donghyuck and Jeno with Jaemin. Just like Mark, Jeno became the CEO of his Dad’s company in France in spite of his young age. Jeno didn’t want the position at first— he never did— but his father insisted with much persistence so Jeno couldn’t decline the offer.  He too had moved to the company’s base in Europe since it made things easier for him. Jeno hated traveling back and forth from Korea and the jet lag that came with it so he decided to stay in France instead.

 

“So, how are you and Donghyuck?” Jeno suddenly asked when his order had finally arrived; the query caught Mark off guard.

 

Jeno was quiet, silently stirring his own cup but he was also expecting, awaited what his friend had to say. But Mark was quick to recover from his initial daze and he didn’t answer, he just shrugged his shoulders casually and brushed the conversation off. As weird as it sounded, Jeno understood the underlying meaning behind Mark’s actions and hadn’t interrogated him any further, he just took it as that.

 

Mark’s life had mostly been smooth sailing despite rocky waves and rigorous storms; that had never changed. After he had confessed a few years ago, Donghyuck and Mark finally got together, exclusively. They went steady till the end of their senior year in high school but Mark had to return home for certain personal reasons. His dad had drastically fallen ill and his mom had asked— practically begged— him to come back so Mark was left with no choice but to pack his bags and catch the first flight to Toronto. He told Donghyuck— of course— he told his lover almost everything. As much as he didn’t want to be separated from Donghyuck, he had to; a long distance relationship was very much uncalled for. Mark had been insecure about it first, afraid of the possibility that it wouldn’t work out for them in the end and that they would just break up. But Donghyuck wanted their relationship to carry on, so with much difficulty and perseverance, everything turned out well. After he graduated, Donghyuck followed Mark to Canada despite numerous job offerings in Korea. They settled down there for good, together.

 

“How about you, man? How are you and Jaemin?” Mark shot back, hoping that the other would just be as overwhelmed as he was.

 

But unlike him, Jeno only smiled. And just like before, when they were still kids, even without words, Mark knew what the simple simper meant. They didn’t need words to communicate— he understood. And from what Mark had heard from Donghyuck— since he regularly stayed in touch with his best friend unlike Mark did— they had been going strong for all those years, after all the pining and drama. It took them awhile but at least they ended up together, and that was what all that mattered.

 

They continued talking some more later on, just random things that popped up out of the blue; how Toronto and Paris were, their jobs, life in general. Then the front door creaked open and when Mark turned his head to the side, he saw another familiar face nearing them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Jaemin-ah!” Mark exclaimed rather enthusiastically. He was shocked; he hadn’t expected to see the younger male that day. “It’s been awhile.”

 

 

 

 

“Nice to see you again too, hyung.” Jaemin waved and grinned at him. Ah, he hadn’t changed at all. Maybe a tad bit taller and more physically mature, but just as pretty as he was before. He was still the ‘Na Jaemin’ that Mark had known and that Jeno loved _oh so dearly_.  

 

Mark opened his mouth, to add something, but was cut off when—

 

 

 

 

 

“Daddy!” a small yet high pitched voice came from not too far away. Though astonished, it was only then did Mark notice that Jaemin hadn’t came alone.

 

The corner of Jeno’s lips tugged upward into an extensive smile that reached till his eyes, it formed crescent moons and he hurriedly went out of his seat, bent his knees, hunched his body forwards and opened his arms wide, welcoming the small kid. “Hi kiddo.”

 

A toddler, about 2 or 3 years old, wobbled slightly as he ran towards Jeno, barely managed to not stumble down on his own two feet, and the latter enveloped the younger in a tight embrace and carried him on his arms. There was no denying the profound happiness that shone pass Jeno’s orbs as he caught the child and even Mark was speechless at the touching encounter.

 

 

 

 

“Who is this?” Mark dared ask.

 

“Baby, meet your Uncle Mark.” Jaemin stood beside Jeno then gestured the infant towards the much older male in front of them. The kid’s gaze then held his, staring at Mark intently before he looked startled. Then suddenly, he hid his face behind Jeno, arms raised to cover his head, peaking at Mark through tangled limbs. He was shy and Mark wanted to coo. The little child was adorable!

 

And then it struck him, the realization hit him so hard that he felt absolutely stupid for not noticing it sooner. Mark couldn’t stop looking back and forth at Jeno and the kid. It was really strange, Mark decided. They looked slightly alike, the similarities were uncanny. Could it mean— “Don’t tell me you guys—”

 

But Jeno paid him no mind; Jeno was rather engrossed in teasing the kid, trying to get the young boy to greet Mark formally though it was in vain. He was usually bubbly but it appeared like he was awkward with strangers and was wary of them.

 

When his curiosity had gotten the best of him, Mark hastily turned to Jaemin instead, hoped for a vivid explanation his own best friend could never give.

 

 

 

 

 

Jaemin gave him a smile in amusement, sensing Mark’s confusion and replied simply, “that’s Jisung,” pointing at the kid in his lover’s arms.

 

 

 

 

Mark was dumbfounded at the answer.

 

 

_Oh._

 

 

 

  
**THE END.**


End file.
